No More Chasing: A Meditation For Inner Belonging

So many of us are caught in a quiet chase—chasing perfection, worthiness, or a version of ourselves we think will finally be “enough.” In this guided meditation, you’re invited to stop running and gently turn toward the parts of yourself you’ve learned to hide. Through soothing visualization, we soften the need to be perfect and welcome the whole self—light, shadow, and everything in between. This is a practice of inner belonging, a soft place to land, and a reminder that you were never meant to chase what already lives within you.

Music by Maksym Dudchyk from Pixabay

Transcript

Welcome to Whispers of the Heart,

Guided Meditations.

I'm your host and the voice behind the meditation,

Noriko Tanigawa.

Today's meditation is called No More Chasing,

A meditation for inner belonging.

Because sometimes,

Without even realizing it,

We spend our days chasing.

Chasing perfection,

Chasing approval,

Chasing the version of ourselves we think we are supposed to be.

But real belonging,

It doesn't come from becoming someone else.

It comes from letting yourself be exactly who you are,

Right here,

Right now.

This practice is an invitation to put down the chase,

To stop fixing,

To stop performing,

And to finally,

Finally rest in your own enoughness.

Whether you are carrying self-judgment,

Shame,

Or just the quiet ache of never quite there,

This space is here for you.

Now,

Let's begin.

Find your breath,

And softly,

Lovingly,

Let's come home to ourselves.

Find a comfortable seat or lie down.

And for today's practice,

I want you to spend this moment to find this position that works best for you.

So,

If you're usually sitting up,

You might want to lie down today.

And if you lie down all the time,

Maybe you might want to try sitting up.

You might want to lie down on your back like Shavasana,

But maybe today you might want to lie on your belly,

Or lie on your side,

Be in a fetal position,

Whatever the position that works for you.

Feel free to explore the position that's you.

There's no right or wrong way,

And if one position makes you a little uncomfortable,

Feel free to move.

You might want to change the position every three to five minutes,

And that's okay.

Let's create this very safe place where you get to be you.

Now,

Hopefully by now you found your position that you love,

That feels you in this moment.

Let's take a deep breath in and out three times.

Let's take a deep breath in,

And breath out.

Let's take another deep breath in,

And one more time.

Let's take a deep breath in,

And breath out.

Allow your breath to get back to normal.

Let's feel your breath coming in and out.

Just let your body handle the breath,

And you'll notice your breath is not regular,

Sometimes shallow,

Sometimes deep.

It's not as rhythmic as you think it should be,

And it's just your body knowing exactly how much oxygen to take,

And how much of the air you need to release,

Whatever it is that you're ready to let go.

And this breath is uniquely you,

And there's no right or wrong way to do it.

So today we are going to look at ourselves,

And we are going to create this very safe place to accept ourselves as a whole.

I want you to think about who you are in your life.

How do you introduce yourself to others?

And I think for most of us,

It depends on the circumstances and situations,

Because we take on so many different roles in our life.

Sometimes what you do to live for your work becomes your primary identity.

And some other times,

The role you fulfill in your family,

Especially if your parents,

Becomes your primary identity.

And some others,

It just becomes a friend.

And sometimes,

When you're playing sports,

You become an athlete.

And when you're doing some passion project,

If it's something that's creative,

Something to do with art,

You become an artist.

I want you to just think about all these different identities that you have,

And just take it in,

Because each one of us is not just a simple being.

We are multi-faceted,

Multi-layered,

Very complex being that not just one tiny bit of identity explains the totality of us.

Our identity is more complicated.

It has more layers to it.

And that's exactly what makes us unique.

We need to think of one of those 80s disco ball with all these tiny pieces of mirrors stuck on a ball that reflects light.

If you're too young to remember that,

I'm pretty sure you've seen it on TV or the movie.

Anyway,

I want you to think of that as you.

Each little identities that you possess represents one tiny mirror.

But you're not just that tiny one mirror,

Are you?

You are this entire disco ball that is ready and capable of refracting everything around.

All you need is a light and you're ready to shine.

So when you look at this disco ball as you,

You will probably notice that there are some parts of it that is left in the darkness.

There's not much going on.

It's pretty much hidden and those are the parts that you'd rather hide from other people's view or maybe you want to hide it from yourself too.

So let's bring light to those parts that you're hiding from yourself and others.

We are going to look at ourselves as a whole.

Now I want you to really look at those parts of you that you're ashamed of.

The part that makes you feel not good enough or not lovable.

We all have this,

Right?

We all have parts of us that we don't really like about ourselves.

The parts of us that we'd rather hide from other people.

We are ashamed.

We are embarrassed.

And we might even hate that part about ourselves.

And for now,

I want you to just allow that to be there.

Acknowledge that you have those parts.

You don't have to do anything.

You don't need to fix it if you don't feel good about it.

Those parts of you,

Allow it to be.

Just feel whatever that is coming up to you.

We are not trying to change it,

Fix it,

Chase it away or anything.

Allow it to be here now.

Now,

Let's take a step further.

And I want you to look at yourself.

And then think about what made you feel that way.

And I think for most of us,

We probably feel deficiency in that area.

That somehow we are not good enough compared to others.

And we might even repeat some of the words that we heard as a child.

From our parents or teachers.

How not able to do it or not being able to accomplish it well means you're less than and somehow you're not worthy of love.

And we have this image of us that we created through all the comments that we heard by adults and other people surrounding us as we are growing up.

We created this like phantom image of us that are perfect that we could never,

Ever reach.

We already know that we cannot be this superhuman that we created,

But we somehow beat ourselves down each and every time when we compare ourselves to this phantom self and we fall short.

Of this image.

And while this phantom image that we all created when we were young was a great idea when we were little because we needed it in order for us to understand how to be functional in this society,

How the rules work,

And how to be a responsible adult navigating in this society.

But we are now an adult and we don't have to hold on to this anymore.

And I think this image of us is pretty harmful because because we compare ourselves to this phantom image of us.

We never let love in because we think we are not worthy of love.

So we are conditioning ourselves to seek conditional love only and not practicing unconditional love to ourselves.

And if you have noticed this phantom self changes the goal post all the time.

Once you're able to do one thing it gives you another things that you cannot do that you should be doing and somehow makes you not good enough.

When you start comparing yourself with others or this phantom image of yourself there is no end.

You will always find someone who is better than you in doing this one thing than you.

And you might even have this role model that you have in your head that you aspire to be.

But then if you actually look at this person that you're aspiring to be or you're inspired by if you really really look closely to that person's life this person isn't perfect either.

This person has a whole new set of difficulties and challenges and so-called deficiencies that they're struggling to overcome just like you.

So in that sense we are not alone.

We all have this and also just because we all have it doesn't mean it's healthy for us to hold on to it or it's good for us to hold on to this image.

What if we let go?

What if we stop our chase?

Trying to be this phantom image of ourselves that will never get there.

What if love is something that we can open our heart to right now instead of some kind of future tense that will get some kind of love only when we become this phantom self one day.

What if we let go of the excuse that we are holding on to that doesn't allow ourselves to be loved?

What if accepting exactly the way we are right now opens our heart to love and to be loved?

Bringing more compassion to ourselves and by fully loving ourselves we get to love others the same.

And what if by cultivating unconditional love to ourselves and others we create this world a kinder,

Gentler,

More loving place for everyone?

And what if you being this brave one who let go of this phantom perfect image of ourselves gives permission to others to do the same?

So I want you to imagine yourself standing in this white blank space.

This space that expands in infinite direction.

You don't see any walls or boundaries and you're just standing there and in front of you visualize this phantom image of your perfect self.

That you've been carrying all your life.

I want you to look at this phantom image straight into the eyes and say thank you.

Thank you for being here.

Thank you for being in my life up to this point.

And I know you were trying your best to guide me in your own way but I think I got it from now.

I can let go of you with love because I don't need to be perfect like you to be loved.

I'm going to start loving myself exactly the way I am right now without needing to fix anything.

Without needing to change who I am.

Without needing to do anything differently or special.

Without meeting everybody else's expectations.

I'm enough.

I am perfect in my own way with all the imperfection I have within me.

And I'm learning to love and accept myself exactly the way I am without any judgment.

So thank you for being here phantom self but I don't need you anymore.

And I'm gonna send you off with love.

And I would like you to take one step closer to your phantom self.

Give your phantom self a hug.

Although this figure and your ego may have tormented you,

Shamed you,

Made you feel like you're despicable sometimes.

Less than average person and somehow you being horrible or really bad.

They also taught you many many lessons and one of the most important lesson you're about to learn is this.

You don't need to be someone to be loved.

You can start loving yourself right now.

And you can make that change right in this moment.

And as you release from hugging your phantom self,

Allow your phantom self to walk away and then watch it dissolve into a mist.

And now I want you to think of that disco ball from earlier.

And all the darker parts of the disco ball.

That never seen the light before.

I want you to look at it as just another part that makes you you.

This very complex and unique you.

And just because you've never shined light to that part of you.

That doesn't mean that it needs to be hidden forever.

So you being this director of your life.

Know that you can direct the light in any direction possible.

So imagine you're holding this light.

That is unconditional love.

Nice,

Warm,

Bright light.

And you get to shine this light into this darkest part of this disco ball of yourself.

And bring more love in that area.

And in this very safe,

Sacred place.

You don't have to worry about how that's gonna look like.

Because nobody else is looking at it but you.

Let's bring light.

Do you see all the hidden part of you beautifully lit up by this unconditional love?

Bringing much needed warmth and love.

Without needing to fix anything,

Change anything.

It's here now.

Whether you like it or not.

It's here and that's part of you.

That's what makes you you.

This very unique,

Complex person.

And know that each one of us has this dark space.

We all have this and it's okay.

And for most of us,

Those dark areas are the parts of us that we don't like about ourselves.

And that's okay too.

You know,

It's okay to not like something.

But we can still bring love to that aspect of us that we don't like about ourselves.

Like and dislike is just a preference.

And love is something that we can practice unconditionally.

Meaning that we can learn to love something that we don't like.

Especially with this English language and Western culture.

We sometimes mix up like and love as preference.

But these two are very different things.

We can like something or not like something.

That's our preference.

That's our individual taste.

And love is something that comes from our heart.

Something that lovingly accepts without any judgment.

Something that welcomes its presence.

Can you bring love to parts of you that you don't really like about yourself?

Because you're here.

And by loving that part that you don't really like about yourself.

By acknowledging that it's here and by welcoming its presence.

Then you can do something about it to start the healing process.

You don't need to shame and punish the part of you that you don't like about.

You can bring much-needed healing through love and acceptance.

And can you imagine the world where we all practice our unconditional love like that too?

And not just to ourselves but to each other,

Community and society.

The world is going to be such a loving place.

Can you imagine living a life where you're not being judged by others?

You're not shameful of anything and you can just be you.

And then we can totally do this because we can start by practicing this ourselves.

And slowly spreading this to our everyday interaction with others.

So we no longer need to chase something that's not here.

Someone who we are not.

We can just accept us exactly the way we are and love ourselves for exactly who we are.

Let's take a deep breath in.

And breath out.

Ah.

Hopefully by now you feel the buzzing sensation of unconditional love.

From head to toe we're gonna bring this back into our physical reality.

Are you ready to bring more love into yourself?

Are you ready to bring more love into others?

Let's slowly wiggle our toes and fingers.

Rotate our ankles and wrists.

Shake your head yes and no.

And whenever you're ready,

Slowly open your eyes.

Welcome back.

Whenever you are struggling with self-acceptance and you feel not good enough or unworthy,

Come back to this practice.

More you practice unconditional love to yourself,

More you get to embody that unconditional love and spread it to others.

With all the spiritual healing,

It really starts with you.

So let's be this brave soul who takes this giant step to love ourselves unconditionally.

Thank you very much for being part of this healing journey.

I love and appreciate you and sending you all my love and support.

I love you all.

Thank you so much for listening and I will see you next time.