10 Day Meditation Challenge For Beginners, #4, Inner Critic

A warm welcome to you.

I am delighted to share this time with you.

During this meditation,

We shall shine a gentle light on that part of ourselves that can be self-critical.

We may call it our inner critic,

Our saboteur,

Our negative voice.

It doesn't matter what we call it.

We all have one.

Sometimes its voice is strong and clear,

Sending its message from the mountaintops deep into the valley below.

And sometimes it is more like a whisper,

Touching you like a gentle sea breeze.

This voice may speak to you at work,

At home,

Even in your dreams.

It may appear when you are on your own or in the company of others.

Perhaps it's there when you look at yourself in the mirror,

Quietly whispering to you that it does not like what it sees.

Maybe when you try something new,

It may quietly speak in your ear,

Warning you that you are not sufficiently capable.

When you desire to communicate your ideas and thoughts to people,

It may be there,

Gently tapping you on the shoulder,

Planting the seed that if people see you for who you really are,

They may not accept you.

By gently focusing our awareness on this part of ourselves,

By attending to it with both curiosity and openness,

We may begin to understand it a little more.

It is through this understanding that we may strengthen our capacity to release its grip.

Whether loud or soft,

Overt or subtle,

Negative beliefs and attitudes about ourselves are more than just thoughts holding space in our minds.

They have a real physical effect on our bodies,

Our minds and our hearts.

Negative self-talk stimulates the stress response in us and over the long term can lead to unnecessary worry,

Anxiety,

Fear and feelings of low self-worth.

This can have a profound impact on the way we see ourselves.

When the inner critic tightens its grip,

It can trick us into thinking that we do not deserve to be happy.

It can convince us that our choices are limited,

That we are not good enough or not sufficiently capable.

Seeing ourselves through these limiting lenses hides us from new experiences and opportunities.

Our view of the world and our place within it is contracted.

So before we begin to understand this part of ourselves a little more,

Let's take a moment to settle into a comfortable position,

Closing down your eyes if you like.

Making any adjustments you need so that you feel comfortable and supported.

Giving yourself permission now to really settle in,

Remembering that it's okay to take this time for yourself.

Bringing your awareness now to your breath.

Noticing the feel of the air as it enters your nose and leaves your mouth.

Noticing the gentle rise and fall of your chest.

Noticing the soft expanse of your belly as the air flows in and out.

Allowing yourself to soften a little on each exhale as if your breath carries tension out of your body.

Surrendering to the rhythm of your breath.

Relaxing into the simplicity of this movement of being breathed.

Gently moving your attention now to your mind.

How does your mind feel?

Alert,

Busy,

Peaceful,

Sharp,

Fluid,

Foggy.

Taking a moment to reflect on the tone of your thoughts today.

Where would they sit on a continuum from supportive to self-critical?

With over 60,

000 thoughts a day,

It's no surprise that so many of them are reoccurring.

Some research even suggests that up to 98% of the thoughts we have today,

We also had yesterday.

No doubt many of these have a self-critical tone.

We all have self-critical thoughts that are reoccurring in our mind.

They are like music tracks that play on repeat day after day.

Inviting you now to spend some time identifying some of your self-critical thoughts.

Some of the tracks that play day after day in your mind.

Sometimes loud,

Sometimes so quietly you almost can't hear them.

What are some of the themes that regularly take over your mind?

Are you critical of your physical appearance?

Are you hard on yourself when you make mistakes or when things don't go to plan?

Do you worry you aren't good enough,

That you are not sufficiently capable?

Is there a quiet rhythm in the back of your mind whispering to you that you do not deserve to be happy?

Spending a few moments now letting these critical thoughts move around your body,

Mind and heart.

No need to analyse,

No need to judge.

Just seeing if you can attend to these thoughts with curiosity and openness.

I wonder if through this awareness,

If any of these thoughts have changed shape,

If they have altered in strength or potency,

Or if your relationship to them has changed.

Often the very act of awareness can loosen the hold these thoughts and beliefs have on you.

Inviting you now to spend some time imagining you are sitting on a large smooth rock by a gentle flowing river.

The rock has been warmed by the sun and you are enjoying the sensation of receiving this warmth.

The river is clean and cool and makes a soft trickling noise as the water streams by.

You can feel a slight breeze on your skin.

You feel calm and relaxed.

You are surrounded by rocks of different shapes,

Sizes,

Colours and textures.

One of these rocks grabs your attention,

So you pick it up,

You examine it,

Noticing its details,

Its colour,

Its texture.

Imagining now that this rock represents one of the criticisms you hold about yourself.

Feel how heavy it is in your hand,

Feel how it weighs you down.

When you are ready,

Throw this rock into the river,

Watching it sink,

Falling heavy to the river bed below.

How do you feel after throwing the rock and the negative self-talk into the river?

Noticing any feelings of lightness,

Of relief,

Of freedom,

Of ease.

Noticing also any resistance to letting the rock or the negative thoughts go.

Accepting with ease and grace any feelings that come up for you.

Just allowing this experience to be what it needs to be.

When you are ready,

Taking a moment now to pick up another rock,

Again noticing its details,

Noticing its weight in your hand.

What self-criticism does this rock represent to you?

When you are ready,

Toss this rock into the river,

Watch it sink to the river bed below.

Letting go,

Letting be,

Feeling light,

Feeling free.

Visualisations like these can be helpful in reducing the grip of your inner critic.

I wonder how you found this experience?

No right or wrong,

Just being curious.

Another approach for responding to our inner critic can be to offer yourself some soothing,

Supportive phrases in response to critical thoughts.

Cultivating this ability to be on your own side is a powerful practice.

I am going to suggest some phrases that may appeal to you after I have said the phrase gently and silently repeat it to yourself in your mind.

Being curious about which phrases speak to you most strongly.

I am capable.

I am trying my best.

It's okay to feel this way.

I cannot control everything.

I am learning all the time.

I deserve to be happy.

Could you relate to any of these supportive phrases?

What phrases could you use to support yourself when you notice your inner critic tightening its grip?

Spending some time now tapping into your own inner wisdom.

How can you support yourself when your inner critic appears?

Perhaps you will use a letting go visualisation,

Perhaps a supportive phrase or even a few soothing breaths.

Maybe the simple act of cultivating awareness will be enough for you.

Offering yourself a gentle commitment now about how you would like to respond to your inner critic.

Sealing this commitment with three deep mindful breaths.

Slowly finding movement now through your fingers and toes.

Taking any other movements your body needs.

When you are ready please open your eyes.

May you move through your day with greater awareness of your inner critic and a stronger sense of how to be on your own side.