The first step in practicing self empathy is really being present with yourself with compassion.
So whatever you're bringing into this moment,
Bring a wide field of compassion to meet it.
Allow your heart to open and to be present with whatever you are experiencing.
If it is hard to really tap into this compassion for yourself,
You can borrow some of it from me or you can imagine an earlier moment with someone you love where you have experienced that beautiful compassion and acceptance and just presence with all that is.
From this compassion,
All healing is possible.
Today,
We're going to invite some inquiry around a particular moment of something that you or someone else said or an action that was taken that brought about discomfort,
Irritation,
And satisfaction.
Identify a particular moment of what something said.
Someone said a couple of sentences or did a specific action that you were unhappy with.
Bring that to mind now without piling on any stories,
Without piling on interpretations.
Just what was the moment when you shifted and something difficult arose in you?
Isolate it to a few words that were said or a simple action and look inside about what are you feeling in response to that?
As you're feeling into it,
Do you notice a tension in your shoulders or neck,
A tightening of your stomach?
How does this irritation live in your body and in your emotional landscape?
From this awareness of how this moment has affected you,
Touch into your deeper values of what really matters to you about this situation.
Is it that you're longing for more connection or more autonomy?
What is the bigger picture value that matters to you underneath this situation?
As you connect into those deeper values,
Perhaps honesty or peace,
Something to do with meaning or even play,
What is it that was missing in that moment when something shifted for you?
As you connect to that value that really matters to you,
How are you experiencing it?
Are you still in that original feeling tone of frustration,
Irritation?
Are you in a space of sadness for that value not being honored in this situation?
Allow yourself to shift.
Are you experiencing that unmet need now?
Allow yourself as much time as you need to tap into the beauty of that unmet need.
We all are so human and we have these same beautiful needs and one,
They're not met.
They remind us of what can make our lives more beautiful.
Now as you tap into that unmet need,
Ask the question of what?
What is one small thing you can do to connect more to that need in your life?
It could be something like journaling about that need and what is it like when it's really met?
It could be a step of brainstorming.
How could I get that need met,
Whether in this particular situation or in another situation?
Take a moment to look for one small step that you can take to honor your beautiful need.
Allow yourself the gift of connecting with this need,
Knowing that it matters.
Matters to you and it's a need that matters to others as well.
And by putting this attention on it,
You are shifting your energy from a space of constriction and confusion to clarity about what really matters and about what you can do to bring that into your life.
Now if your situation included another person who perhaps expressed their unmet needs in a tragic way,
Ask what could they have been longing for that they weren't able to express?
Try to empathize with them.
What beautiful human need were they struggling with?
And maybe there's an opportunity for you to go back and check in with them about what was going on for them and to share what was going on for you and what matters to you in the situation moving forward.
From this resourced place,
You bring the gift of connecting with the beauty of our needs and open to more possibilities to creatively meeting everyone's needs.
Thank yourself for taking the time to practice today.
May you have the courage and strength to bring this beautiful integrity with you into your day.
Namaste.
