The skill of tenderness.
No matter what doorway we use into meditation,
Or we could call it a gateway,
There will always be experiences that occur during the practice that will encompass a range of sensations,
Feelings and emotions.
As we give over to meditation we come into a state of rest.
We naturally start to relax.
We move into scientifically what we would call the parasympathetic state where we feel safe and secure.
Part of the beauty of meditation is that in this relaxed and safe state our subconscious can bring up feelings,
Emotions,
Memories that are painful and our spirit is looking to release them.
It's times like these that we want to practice being compassionate with ourselves.
To allow all the feelings and sensations to run through our body completely and hold ourselves with complete and utter tenderness.
If you think of how you hold a newborn child or a kitten or a puppy,
Can you hold yourself this tenderly?
One of the radiant sutras speaks to this being with ourself in times of darkness and the attitude that we take towards ourselves at that time and it refers to that as a fierce tenderness.
Let's just listen and feel the words of Sutra 64.
Thoughts are hidden in darkness and difficult nights.
You awaken into a pang of aloneness,
A howl of separation.
This is the call of the dark one,
The roar of life seeking its source.
The union you long for is within reach.
Throw off all hesitation,
Become one with the fear.
Plunge into the uncanny blackness,
Eyes wide open as if there were no other choice.
Vibrating with fierce tenderness,
Breathe intimately with the Lord of infinite space.
Vibrating with fierce tenderness for whatever arises.
This is a skill to be practiced over and over again.
We can judge ourselves harshly for past transgressions.
Can you forgive yourself completely?
Tenderly holding space for yourself.
We can relive times where we have been terribly hurt.
Can you feel the depth of love and compassion for your former self that experienced these hurts?
These wounds can become portals to healing.
But only,
Only when we can show ourselves this fierce tenderness.
A tenderness that says no matter what others think,
No matter how I've treated myself in the past,
I'm going to allow myself to experience fully everything that I am.
And at the same time be held and safe and treasured.
So as you're meditating,
No matter what the doorway,
Whether it's with something that you love or some place or experience or person,
As you engage with all of your senses and you're open to the universe of feelings and sensations,
Go there with the intention that no matter what arises,
That you'll tend to your experience with a gentleness that is like a warm embrace.
