The State Of Our Nervous System

If you broaden your time frame to include right now to 20 minutes ago and over the last few months, what is your sense of your overall nervous system right now? As you're bringing those forward, stay really connected in your body. We're just looking.

Transcript

Notice your whole body from head to toes.

Notice your breath.

There's that sensation of air in the nostrils.

The movement in the stomach area,

Navel center,

Lower belly.

And notice again the whole of your body and how you feel energetically.

That's your overall sense of how you feel right now.

If you broaden the time frame to include right now,

But also 20 minutes ago and two weeks ago and just generally the last few months.

What is your sense of the overall state of your nervous system right now?

One of the things that happens when we're under threat is that we have a lot more hypervigilance.

We feel kind of charged up or we might feel really depleted.

Suddenly there's a lot more anxiety and anxious thoughts,

Compulsive thinking.

And we're not saying that any of that is wrong.

It's all human nature.

It's all part of our nervous system.

Our nervous system,

Our primitive brain,

That whole mechanism has evolved to keep us safe.

And part of that safety is feeling comfortable and secure.

We have a predictability,

At least in our conscious mind.

Life goes this way and I can count on these things,

My job,

My relationships,

The people that are around me.

I can count on coming here.

I can count on,

You know,

If you like to knit,

That knitting might be relaxing or if you have a pet or an animal that you enjoy or a person.

We have these ideas that we can count on certain things to help us feel better.

They help us feel grounded.

We know that when we come and do a relaxation practice that by the end of the practice,

People generally will feel more relaxed.

Our mind has settled.

Our breath has gotten more ease.

One of the ways that the nervous system alerts us to danger is that we get an energetic feeling of that.

Our mind starts to be more hypervigilant.

We notice sounds.

We're scanning the environment with our eyes.

We're looking around.

We might have more thoughts about what's going to happen next and how am I going to protect myself and people that I care about.

All of that is natural.

That's the way our nervous system works.

We have a drive to survive physically and we have a sense of community as well that our survival is best met when we're in community.

All of those are true around our nervous system.

We feel better.

We feel safer when certain conditions are here and we feel less safe when other conditions are here.

When we're doing a practice where we're connecting and noticing our body,

We're letting our breath be easier,

More continuous and smooth.

We're working with thoughts in the mind.

Our cortisol supports our feeling of being grounded and comfortable and safe.

And when we're doing these practices to feel this way,

We generally approve of ourselves for doing that.

It would be unlikely to shame ourselves for coming to do a relaxation practice.

There's something that we know is this is a good thing.

We're doing something healthy for ourselves.

Our nervous system,

We're nourishing ourselves,

We're supporting ourselves.

So this drive for comfort and safety,

We're not judging that drive and we're not judging how we're meeting that need.

Notice again your whole body,

What came up.

Just hearing those words and really acknowledging,

Yeah,

That is how the nervous system works.

When we're under threat or we feel like there's danger,

Certain things happen in our system.

We prepare and we try to keep ourselves safe.

That makes sense.

And when we're doing something like this,

A practice,

We're not shaming ourselves for that.

We're approving of ourselves.

We're doing something that's good for us and that's helpful.

Feel that in your body.

Feel it in your breath.

Notice again if there's tension or tightness somewhere in your body.

Finally we have to come back over and over again to softening and relaxing.

Let the thoughts move to the background for a moment.

Just rest,

Be aware of your body and breath.

And now for a moment let's look at some of the less healthy ways that we comfort ourselves.

And one of the real factors in this is shame.

So if we comfort ourselves by doing a breathing and relaxation practice,

It has a very different feel in our body than if we comfort ourselves by eating too much ice cream or gambling or drinking or smoking a joint or whatever it might be.

Some people really relax when they go shopping.

There's some people they get on the phone and talk to their friend or maybe they gossip about somebody.

There's so many different ways that we interact and that we find our way to kind of comfort ourselves.

We get into these familiar grooves.

So notice what you do to comfort yourself,

What you've been doing over the last few days,

Few weeks,

Few months.

And as you're bringing those forward and looking at them,

Stay really connected in your body and your breath.

We're just looking.

I know that when I feel under threat I do things to calm myself and these are some of the things.

As you're looking at those,

Notice if there's any shame.

And in this sense,

We're not trying to say that drinking is good or gambling or eating or any of those things.

We're not looking at it from a good,

Bad,

Healthy,

Unhealthy.

Just for the moment,

Look and see if you're shaming yourself for doing that.

Well,

I should be able to manage this without ice cream.

Or maybe you're shaming somebody else.

They shouldn't be drinking like that.

Stay connected with your breath.

Thing about shame is that it always shuts us down.

So we might be going from having some feeling of connection and empathy and kindness for ourselves that it's a very hard time right now.

Our nervous systems are all struggling to stay regulated.

Some days that's going better than other days.

We all want comfortable.

We all want safe.

We all want I'm going to be okay.

And that's hard to come by right now.

So our nervous systems know that even if we reassure ourselves in our mind,

We're feeling the change,

The global pandemic,

The militarized police,

The Black Lives Matters,

The death of George Floyd,

And also the people that took to the streets and are still doing that to protest that.

It's a very unsettled time.

So let's see if we can move into and maybe you already are moving into some compassion,

Some support.

If you look at your own ways that you have been supporting and comforting yourself,

Probably some of them are really helpful.

I've been going out for a lot more walks,

Getting outside.

I know a lot of other people have.

Sometimes people go for a drive and that makes them feel better.

We might be reducing some of the stressors that normally kind of push us a bit.

We might be trying to just really take care of ourselves in a lot of really good ways.

A lot of people are eating really well most of the time.

And this is a really nuanced,

It's not a all or nothing kind of a thing.

The fact that you're listening to this practice and doing this practice would indicate that at least a lot of the time you're really trying to do things that are helpful and supportive.

And then we bring in with this clarity and also with kindness,

What are some of the things that we're doing that aren't so helpful?

That make us feel shut off,

Shamed,

Frustrated with ourselves.

It's really frustrating to know that we're doing something that's harmful to our health,

Physical,

Mental,

Emotional health.

And judging ourselves or shaming for that is really unhelpful,

It really makes it worse.

See if you could sit with that.

And if the person that was doing the same things you're doing is someone that you really love,

Your partner,

Good friend,

Child,

How would you support them during this time?

What would you think about them and what might you say to them?

And bring up an image of somebody or how would you like for someone else to support you in this time?

What would you say?

It's not your fault that the world is as it is and that you're struggling.

We're in a common situation with other people.

I want you to feel better,

I want you to do things that are really nourishing.

And it kind of upsets me when I see things that are harmful for you,

When you're overeating or drinking or can't get out of bed.

It hurts to see you struggling so much.

And I love you and I want you to be well.

And if you're thinking of someone else as you're saying those things,

See if you could take that in for you as well.

I can see that you're struggling right now.

I want you to do things that are healthy and supportive and nurturing,

Not things that disconnect you or hurt your health.

And that's a heartfelt wish for you,

Not a shame.

It's really natural that we all do these things and it doesn't make us a bad person.

It doesn't mean that we're always going to be doing them.

It just means that right now,

Sometimes we go into a pattern that's not very healthy for us.

What I really wish with all my heart is for you to be safe and comfortable and happy and to be on your own side.

To move through the difficult,

The shaming really quickly and come back to equilibrium.

Come back to connection with yourself,

With your own goodness.

And then let all of that go,

Rest your attention in your heart center.

Let yourself really feel that love and connection and support.

Notice your body,

Your whole body again,

From head to toes,

Notice your breath,

Notice sounds in the room.

Move your fingers,

Your toes,

Your body,

When you're ready,

Open your eyes.

Reviews

🙏very calming delivery
Excellent tools on this channel! 🌻

Another great talk/practice from Lynn. So helpful for anyone experiencing the after effects of childhood trauma/living with CPTSD.

It helps to understand why. It helps to think about what activities bring me/loved ones relief.

💖💖so spot on, I am so grateful I came across you and this particular meditation today💖💖

Thank you 🙏

Timely and helpful.

Thank you so much Lynn, this was so soothing during a difficult time. 🌸

Beautiful thank you

Love this. This put the words to so many of the struggles and responses I have been trying to observe and name over the past year. Thank you for this gift. It will greatly expand my own meditations.
Namaste 🙏

Amazing! Your voice is so calming. I got in touch with a part of me that has been really scared. Love the distinction between helpful and not helpful (no shame attached) vs healthy and not healthy (which for me has a bit of shame attached).