Part of what we're doing when we're focusing on our own experience is minimizing the input from the outside world during the practice.
It's never gone,
It's always still here inside of us.
So it gives us that opportunity to work more with what's here.
As we soften the forehead,
Let go of worry,
We might also notice the content of the thoughts in the mind.
And often we have a real habit of criticizing our experience.
Well,
I don't feel very open-hearted right now or whatever that might be.
If that is happening,
Just to notice it is a good idea and then let it be as it is.
Nothing we can really do about that at the moment.
Notice the sensation of air as it moves in and out of your nose.
Notice your mouth,
Your jaw,
Your tongue,
Your throat.
Another way that we can let go of the past and the future is to work with relaxing through the upper back and the shoulders.
We brace ourselves habitually against hurt.
So to soften ourselves is also helpful.
You could bring your shoulders up a bit or simply bring your awareness into your upper back,
Back of the neck.
You can move your head around if you want.
What's happening in the back,
Large muscles that cover the shoulder blades.
And behind the heart center.
It would make sense that if we have a really tight body that we wouldn't have such an open heart.
Let your body soften from the neck and shoulders down through the front of the chest,
Those large muscles of the chest,
Large muscles of the upper back,
Mid back.
Notice as well your neck and shoulders into your arms and hands.
Notice your legs and your feet so that your whole body is back in your awareness.
Notice your breath.
If your breath is smooth and continuous,
It signals to the nervous system that our body is safe.
We also notice how we're working with ourselves.
There's a lot of conditioning in our society to be pushy or critical.
Allowing your heart to open doesn't respond well to that.
If we soften,
We might allow or set up a good condition or cultivate an opening through softening.
It makes sense that we're in a fight,
Flight or freeze.
We're not going to have a soft open heart or a soft relaxed body.
Notice your body from head to toes.
Notice your breath.
Allow your breath to be smooth.
If you're breathing really shallow,
Then allow a little bit more volume.
Deep inhale.
A few long exhales.
Bring your attention back to your chest.
Notice the muscles at the front and the muscles at the back of your heart.
Bring to mind something that you soften around.
It could be a beautiful place in the forest.
It could be a person,
A dog,
A horse,
Hanging out with friends that you feel comfortable with or whatever that might be for you.
Bring to mind and let yourself really visualize it.
Use all of your senses if you can.
You might have a visual image.
You might be aromas or scents.
Sometimes there's touch,
Sounds.
And as you're focusing on something that allows your heart to soften,
Keep that observation.
Noticing feels a little softer.
I'm really focused on that for a bit.
And then I notice some other thoughts come in.
Sometimes those thoughts are kind of neutral.
We can let them be in the background.
But other times something else comes and it closes our heart.
We're just doing an observation of when I deliberately bring something forward that helps my heart to soften.
We notice number one,
It's not perfect.
It's not forever.
Our heart opens and closes all the time.
In some days our heart is pretty closed.
We don't have a lot of access to our feelings.
That often happens when there's been a long period of things feeling overwhelming or something sudden that feels overwhelming.
Kind of block that out or put it away until a better time.
There's all kinds of possibilities.
And all of us have experienced all of those possibilities.
We've all experienced an open heart.
We've all experienced kind of a numbness or I don't want to feel this.
And all the variations of that.
Part of what we're doing is noticing that this isn't static.
This is a moving experience.
And part of what we're doing is noticing what is it that affects the openness or the close process in the heart.
If you were to think about something that makes you angry,
There's usually lots of examples of that pop into the mind.
As you're thinking about that and visualizing that,
Bring it to mind using your senses,
Visual sounds.
Notice what happened with your breath.
Notice the general feeling in your body as you might be going into a fight response.
And check in with your heart.
What does it feel like?
What is the energy,
The sensations?
And then see if you could bring some connection with the part of you that's angry.
Being angry can feel really powerful and validating and we get to work in our mind.
Well,
Of course I'm angry,
That person.
We might have a lot of intensity and of a self-righteousness around what it is we're angry about or at.
Notice the impact that that has on your heart,
On your heart opening.
If you think about some specific person and say,
I feel openhearted towards this person I'm angry about,
It's probably not very true.
And see if you can set that aside for a moment and connect again with you,
The one who feels angry and maybe hard-hearted.
Can you offer yourself some compassion,
Some kindness,
Some support?
It's a difficult experience when we're hijacked by anger.
Let yourself come out of that experience.
If you need to,
You could do some tapping.
You could maybe hold your hands or do some box breathing.
Take in some deep inhales,
Long exhales.
Make some noise if you want.
Let it release out of your body so that you can come back to neutral.
And now notice again your whole body from head to toes.
Notice the mind,
The thoughts in the mind.
Notice if you can have kind of a soft-heartedness or an open-heartedness towards yourself.
As much as you can,
Let go of the stimulus of what it was you're angry about.
Let that move to the background,
Come back into the connection within.
Connecting with your own soft-heartedness,
Your own connection with yourself.
Sometimes there's a sense of an age or a very specific memory might have come up.
You could bring yourself into connection.
We don't get angry for no reason.
Somebody has hurt us or done something wrong.
It could be quite intense or it could be something that's more of an everyday thing,
Like someone cut us off in traffic and we got angry.
See if you could connect with that part,
That part of you that experienced that.
Have some open-heartedness towards you.
Notice what's happening in the muscles of the chest and the upper and mid-back.
Release any tightness out of your shoulders.
Notice other places you might be holding tension.
You might be clenching your teeth,
Frowning.
The arms and legs might be activated,
You could give them a shake or a stretch.
The next couple of minutes,
Let's just come back into this observation.
Notice the area around your heart center,
Your emotional heart.
Notice your breath and the rhythm of the breath just below your heart center.
You could put one or both hands on your heart.
Give yourself enough of a firmness with that,
That you can feel the support through your hands.
Remain aware what's happening in your heart.
What's happening in the whole of your mind-body.
Does it feel like to offer yourself love and support?
So often our conditioning leads us to judge or kind of bully ourselves.
You could step back from that and instead just offer yourself this kind attention.
Watching what's happening as the heart is opening and closing and opening.
We're acknowledging and experiencing directly that this is not static,
This is something that changes.
It changes for reasons.
Let the whole of that go now and enjoy what's here to enjoy.
Let your body soften,
Focus on your breath.
Bring yourself your own kind attention.
When you're ready,
Open your eyes and finish the practice.
