Being okay with who we are and being okay with who others are.
We don't need to be somehow perfect or different.
We could start slow and then move up to love.
Maybe it's something like,
I know who I am.
And does that feel true?
I know who I am.
And so much comes in there about wanting things to be different.
We definitely want other people to be different.
We want our way to be smoother.
We want the people who are there that could be supportive.
We want them to be there for us when we need them.
We want people to be healthy and happy.
If we're around somebody who is clearly different from who we want them to be,
That's difficult.
We might go into judgment.
And this freedom of allowing other people to be who they are,
We could also work with that in terms of allowing ourselves to be who we are.
So just to notice right now,
I know who I am.
And does that feel true?
I know who I am.
And of course,
If we were to make a list,
That would be a long list with much complexity.
Who am I when I'm in a good mood?
Who am I when I'm scared?
Who am I on a much deeper level than my personality and my daily life?
So we might even soften that one a little and be using some inquiry words like,
I'm curious and I'm interested in knowing who I am.
And how does that sit?
I would like to know more about who I am.
I would like to be more in connection with myself.
And notice if you're in your body,
It's probably not a yes,
No,
It's probably somewhere on a continuum.
So we might bring a bit of movement into our body as one way to know who we are.
Notice that.
Wiggle your toes or bring your hands together.
Just do something to bring your sensory awareness into your body.
You give yourself a hug or use your sense of touch to notice your body.
And we know a lot about our body.
We know how it functions.
We know how we are dissociated or disconnected sometimes.
We have a lot of opinions,
Sometimes judgments about our body.
This is such a complex question of,
I know who I am.
There's so many facets to that that are so interesting.
And if we were to move a little bit deeper into this,
I accept who I am.
I accept myself.
And if we lighten that up a little bit,
It might be I acknowledge who I am,
Or I acknowledge my characteristics.
Or it might be true,
I accept myself.
Might be more deeper,
More true.
Notice what's happening in your system as you're entertaining those thoughts.
One of the reasons this is so complicated is because of trauma,
Because of shame.
Somehow could we deepen into allowing ourselves to have made mistakes,
To not be perfectly kind and regulated and happy and cheerful all the time.
So if we were to remove all of the judgment,
What might that look like?
I'm neutral,
This is what I'm observing,
And I'm okay with what I'm seeing.
I'm not pushing myself to be different.
I might have feelings about what I see and what I know.
I might really prefer something to be different,
Or I might be grieving.
Could I allow myself the freedom to be a human being with the experience that I've had,
With the open heart and the more closed heart?
The accepting mind and the judging mind.
What if I could be free from shame and judgment and just be who I am?
Let yourself feel that in your body.
Our minds have a lot of persistent habits,
So it might not even feel possible to be free of judging.
But what if we had a magic wand just for a moment,
And we could sense into that?
I allow myself the space to be who I am,
How I am,
Where I am,
Have a history that I have without judging,
Without shaming.
And see if you could take a few deeper breaths and sense into that,
Feel into that.
I'm free.
You might have an image of that,
Of some of those chains falling away and releasing them,
Letting them go.
And just as this magic wand moment,
Allow yourself to feel into that.
What would it be like?
I'm free.
I don't judge myself.
I know myself.
I accept myself.
And then circling back to,
I love myself.
And I don't need to have any criteria.
I don't need to meet some standard.
I could let the whole arena of judgment and shame and not good enough be as irrelevant as it actually is.
Sit with that for a moment.
I know myself.
I accept who I am.
I love myself.
I don't have to be any different at all.
I could love myself right now as I am.
If you wanted,
You could put your hands on your heart and let yourself feel that.
Let your shoulders release,
Let your heart open and soften.
I love myself just as I am.
I've let go of wanting something different,
Of judging,
Of pushing,
Right now,
Just as I am.
I love myself.
Breathe that in.
May I always know the freedom to love myself.
May I always know the freedom right here,
Right now.
I'm free to love myself.
And that might feel like not very true.
It might feel like there's a lot more work to do there,
Or it might feel quite open and spacious in the moment,
But then we know that it's gonna come back,
That judgmental mind.
This is a practice.
Part of loving ourselves is practicing loving ourselves and practicing being free from judgment.
Open-hearted,
I know and love myself just as I am.
And from there,
We can send that wish,
That blessing.
May I be free from judging other people.
May I cultivate that willingness to let people be who they are and appreciating ourselves and each other for who we are right now in this moment.