Belonging To The Sacred Web Of Life

All My Relations is a profound exploration of relational healing through the lens of Indigenous wisdom, ancestral awareness, and somatic presence. What does it mean to truly belong - to our bodies, our ancestors, our communities, and the living Earth? With reverence for the phrase "All my relations," we explore cultural context and personal experience, reflect on identity, lineage, intergenerational connection, and how safety and kinship can co-exist even amidst complexity.

We are invited to soften into this sacred web of life, breathe with it, and find our place within it - no matter our history, pain, or sense of separation. Where do we feel at home?

Transcript

All our relations.

If you're Indigenous,

You're probably very familiar with that phrase,

Or if you are connected with Indigenous people.

It's something that I hear a lot at the end of ceremonies.

I'm not Indigenous,

I'm a white settler in Canada,

And I also feel very connected in many different ways with Indigenous people,

With the earth.

So we're going to explore a little bit of our ancestors,

Our descendants,

Who we've connected with.

All My Relations is something that's often spoken at the end of a prayer or ceremony by Indigenous people.

It signifies interconnectedness and unity.

It challenges the individualism of Western cultures.

It acknowledges that all humans,

Animals,

Plants,

Rivers,

Mountains,

The earth,

The sky,

We're all relatives.

We're part of the sacred web of life.

We're not separate from the world.

One of the things that I'm cognizant of with a lot of us as we're moving about in the so-called modern world is that we feel very disconnected,

Often disconnected from our body,

From who we are,

And certainly disconnected from families,

From each other,

From each other in a larger sense,

As well as personal relationships,

And from the earth.

All My Relations is a reminder to live with respect for all beings,

To be connected in the world that we're in,

Whether that's our personal neighborhood world,

Our families,

Or the wider world,

That we need to be accountable and connected.

And when we're disconnected,

It has a lot of the impact of what we're seeing now.

So it reflects this way of being where we know that relationship is essential,

It's central to our identity,

To our ethics,

To our existence.

We're part of this sacred web of life.

What does that feel like for a moment to sit with that?

I'm part of the sacred web of life.

Now we're part of this sacred web of connection,

Doing this practice together.

We could breathe that in,

We could allow our body to soften a little perhaps,

Connect with the chair or the floor,

With our feet,

And act with what we're looking at.

If you can see outdoors especially,

Maybe you can see other people or pictures of other people,

Letting ourselves feel that connection.

There's a woman I've been connected with for a while,

Fiery Jean Gravelin with Life as Medicine,

And she talks about how is it to be more than one in one body.

She's an artist and an art therapist.

Much of my work in my art is really trying to come into some wholeness with that process of merging multiple identities within.

What are some of those?

Some of that is our biological ancestors and descendants,

Those of our heart.

We're going to go through these more slowly.

We have relationships,

Romances,

Friendships.

We have our own ways that we identify in relationship and gender identity with our own mind body.

Are we connected and how are we connected with our own body and our own emotions,

Our own sensations,

Our energy?

And then there's people that we've mentored and nurtured,

Being kind with,

And people who have mentored us,

Being kind with us that we feel connected with.

Perhaps we look towards them as an elder or as someone that we feel like they are kin to us.

Other than human beings,

Earth,

Sky,

Water,

Trees,

But also four-leggeds might be a dog or a cat or a horse or something that you've connected with,

Another being who's not human.

Do you feel like there's a integration within yourself of all of these identities or is there something that's pulling at you,

Something that doesn't feel integrated?

A lot of people are blended in terms of there's more than one racial background.

There might be a feeling of disconnection or connection with your gender identity or your sexual orientation.

We have all these identities within us.

Just as we're sitting with this and doing a little bit of a connection with our body,

Is there anything that jumps out at you of something that's a little bit uneasy with the other identities?

Not quite at home.

So let's go into this more specifically.

Where do I belong biologically?

So who are your ancestors?

So if we look at that generally,

I might say my ancestors are mostly Scottish.

I know a little bit about some of them and not a lot about a lot of them.

So what is your ancestral line and is it more one or is there more of a blend of different genetic geographical boundaries and connections there?

When I think about my ancestors,

Often we'll think about parents,

Grandparents,

Aunts and uncles,

Maybe several generations back.

And we can also think about it more globally.

Bdika,

The warrior queen of the Celts,

Is one who comes to mind.

So who is that for you?

And then who do you know as your ancestors through your mother's line?

Most people know who their mother is.

It might be genetic,

It might be adopted mother,

There might be more than one mother figure,

There could be stepmothers and different things.

Who do you know through your matrilineal line in terms of your mother and then their mother,

Grandmother,

Great-grandmother?

Is that something that you've researched?

Is it something that maybe you're very connected in a long line of we know who they are?

I could name my matrilineal line,

I could name my mother's name as Gwen and my grandmother's name was and is that something you know or don't know?

And how do you feel about that?

Was it a close connection?

Was it kind of complicated?

Was it disconnected?

Let's sit with that for a moment,

Your mother's line.

And then what about your father's lineage?

Much more likely to be researched,

Given that we most of us live in a patriarchy,

Where the patriarchal line is probably more researched,

More valued.

Many women take their husband's name if they get married,

Not as common but still generally very common.

I know my father's line back seven generations from when they came to Nova Scotia and an eighth generation back where they were in Scotland when the highland clearances were happening.

They were just smashing the clan system,

So I know a little bit about that.

What is that for you?

Who are those people?

How much do you know about them?

How connected do you feel?

And notice the different elements of that.

Does it feel comfortable?

Are you feeling really connected with them?

When I think about my seven times great-grandparents,

I know both of their names and I think about what it must have been like for them to have made that decision to leave and come to the new world.

And also there's a complexity there around colonialism and what happened once they arrived here.

I feel a lot of empathy around what they had to leave to survive and also then what happened once they got here.

Colonization has had a devastating impact on the Indigenous peoples of this land,

So there's some complexity there when I look back at that biological lineage.

So notice that for yourself.

It might be something you've really sat with a lot,

That you're very familiar with.

It might be something you haven't connected that much with yet.

When you think about your lineage,

How connected do you feel to them?

I know when I was growing up,

I was always told to be proud of them,

That their courage,

And I do feel that they had courage,

So I do feel connected with them in that way.

Sometimes I would use that as an inspiration.

This is my family.

This is the kind of people I come from.

We're brave.

We're fair.

We fight for justice.

Those are some of the things that are in my lineage.

So let's go beyond now the biological into who do you admire as an ancestor who's not biologically your ancestor?

So these are people who influenced us,

Who we feel respect for,

Kinship with.

For me,

Audre Lorde comes to mind,

A Black feminist,

Writer,

Poet,

A real example of courage and authenticity,

Integrity.

So when I think about my elders or ancestors,

Dozens that come to mind,

Audre Lorde is one of them.

Who is that for you?

And how do you feel when you spread your web a little bit wider?

Who are these people that you have felt,

These are people that I could turn to?

I never knew Audre Lorde in person,

But I turned to her books many,

Many times.

There might be other people who are still in their bodies who are alive,

Like Michelle Obama.

There's so many people that we admire.

These are people that I could learn from,

Who I respect,

Who I feel kinship with.

So notice that,

Take a few breaths,

Notice all the different ways that we're connected,

All the different threads.

So who do you belong to as an elder?

Who considers you an elder?

Who are your biological descendants,

If you have biological descendants?

So I have one son and three grandchildren.

And who are children,

If any,

Who you helped to raise,

Who you're not genetically linked with them?

This could be adoptive,

It could be stepchildren.

There's so many families now that are blended families of different children coming together.

Who are the beings who look to us as a wise person for courage,

For connection,

For love?

It could be as a teacher.

I have some wonderful memories of one particular teacher,

Mr.

Harder,

When I was in grade school and then a little bit older.

It could be a therapist or another kind of mentor who we look to as someone who's really helped us and who we respect and who is wise.

And then what about in your neighborhood?

Sometimes one of our children's friends or a neighborhood child just comes into our life and turns to us for connection,

For help.

Is there someone like that that you think of,

Or maybe many?

All these different ways that we mentor people or people who might look to us for that.

And it's not necessarily someone who's younger,

Someone who's struggling and who you are helping.

And then let's take a breath and we'll move on to the next one.

And as we're doing that,

We're just really noticing what is the impact of that in our lives?

In my body or the sensations?

Is it a fond memory?

Many of these are quite complicated,

So it's not just one thing.

And now look at nature.

Who do you feel connected with in nature?

It could be animals,

Some that are wild,

Some that we tame,

Like dogs and cats and horses,

Animals that we have that kind of a relationship with.

Also,

We can feel a kinship.

There's herons that fly over here that I love to see.

What are your relationships in nature?

The standing ones,

The trees,

The waters,

Creeks,

Lakes,

Oceans.

Who are you in kin with?

There's the elements of air,

Earth,

Water,

Fire,

Space.

Do you feel at home in nature?

Or maybe it's more accurate to say,

What are the conditions when you feel at home in nature?

I don't necessarily feel at home in nature when there's a hurricane going on.

I need to protect myself from the winds that are too strong,

And yet I love a breeze.

We all have this continuity of relationship,

And it's complex.

It's not all one thing.

Water is life-giving,

And it can also be destructive in floods,

For instance.

Let's just sit for a moment with,

How do I feel in kinship with Mother Earth,

With the elements,

With other animals,

Other beings?

And one of the things that it's helpful,

I think,

To look into is,

Does it have to be perfectly safe in order for me to feel related?

When we look at all my relations,

That phrase,

Or one of the ways we disconnect sometimes is because a certain person doesn't feel safe,

Or we have a complicated relationship in our families,

Biological stepfamilies,

In our neighborhoods,

Certainly in the wider communities that we're in.

Safety is not assured.

The same with nature.

Can we accept that that is true,

And could we still feel kin?

What are you inspired,

Perhaps,

To develop a little bit more of a closer kin relationship with?

It might be an ancestor,

A descendant,

A teacher,

A mentor,

A tree,

A body of water.

What are you inspired to form a closer connection with?

Let yourself feel that in your body.

Let your body soften and open up.

Yes,

That feels like I'd like to do that.

It might be more general,

Like I have felt so alone,

And here are all these options of ways that I could connect people,

Beings,

Elements.

How might I open to that?

It could be internal,

A closer nourishing,

Nurturing relationship with our body,

With the cells of our body.

It could be anything,

Whatever comes to mind,

Other beings,

Nature,

Our sense of who we are in our lineages,

Who we can count on,

Who we can look to for support,

And who might look to us for support.

This web of connection.

Where are you in that web right now?

And are there some possibilities that might be interesting and helpful to connect with more deeply?

The air we breathe.

Notice your body.

All my relations.

I am connected.

Let yourself feel that in your body.

I'm connected in this sacred web of life.

Let yourself breathe a little easier perhaps.

Notice what that feels like in your body.

Just as our attention is often drawn through the nervous system into how we need to protect ourselves,

We can also turn towards how we can connect.