Accepting Reality

Let's look into the relationship that we're having with the present moment. If you were to have absolutely no shame, no wanting something to be different, that would be a powerful experience or way to experience the moment. In this somatic mindfulness inquiry, we say I Accept What Is, and then we notice our response. It might be a sensation or energy in our body, or we might have thoughts about it. We keep returning to noticing our relationship to what's going on right now, including wanting it to be different, and we offer ourselves kindness and compassion.

Transcript

Let's look into the relationship that we're having with the present moment.

When we look around the space that we're in,

We might be really appreciating that this is where we are.

We might be critical of something in the space.

I have the warmth and safety of my home,

Which hasn't always been the case.

Observing our experience,

Notice what is my response to the experience.

It's a wonderful practice to savor the positive.

What do you really appreciate right now?

Maybe take a few deeper breaths and let your body soften and settle in.

Notice what's coming through your thought stream as you're doing that.

At some point,

Our mind will wander off into something that's not relevant to the practice.

That's what our mind tends to do.

We keep coming back into this observing and noticing our experience and how we feel about our experience.

If you were to have absolutely no shame,

No wanting something to be different,

That would be a powerful experience or way to experience the moment.

Even if you were to say to yourself a reverse inquiry,

Which is when we say something that we would want to be true,

And we know it's probably not quite true,

It's a way to elicit our unconscious objections to it.

If we were to say,

I have complete acceptance of my experience in this moment,

Notice if there's a response.

It might be verbal,

It might be about your body,

It might be about something else.

This is what is,

And I accept it completely.

Sometimes there's a subtle response.

Energy starts to move in your heart area or somewhere in your body.

There might be some verbal response.

I've often had the response,

Yeah,

But it's not fair that it's this way,

Which is not irrelevant to the question,

But it's also not the way life works.

And I open a little bit more into,

This is actually what is in this moment.

And could I stop shaming myself for what's here?

My part that I played,

So to speak.

There's a lot of factors that come into the part that we play.

Could we allow those to be present without shaming ourselves for them?

Our inner critic often has a negative impact on our well-being.

Often the inner critic can really be debilitating.

It can drive us away from connecting with ourselves with kindness.

As we explore this,

I accept what is right now.

Notice if there's any talk back.

Well,

If you weren't so lazy,

The dishes would be done,

Or you'd have made more money.

Maybe it's not that blatant,

Whatever it might be.

I accept what is,

And then we notice our response to that.

And if there's a persistent energy in your body or sensation,

You might really focus in on that for a moment.

Notice the qualities.

Is it moving?

Is it still?

Is there kind of a sharp edge?

Does it peter off and diminish gradually?

What's happening in the space above the sensation or below the sensation?

There's a lot of ways that we can be mindfully observing the sensation.

Sometimes we can go right into the middle of that energy or sensation.

Sometimes there's a resistance or it's not okay for me to go right into that.

I'm going to just focus on the edges for a little bit.

I could let myself be aware of the space around the sensation.

If anything's getting a little bit too intense,

We could always move back a little from it.

We could open our eyes,

Look around,

Exhale a bit longer for a minute.

We're just curious.

This is a somatic mindfulness inquiry.

What's happening and what is my relationship to what's going on right now?

Often the energy in our body has associated memories and thoughts.

So we might sit a little bit with the energy.

I accept what's happening right now.

There are so many things that have happened in all of our lives that have been harmful and that are happening right now for ourselves,

For other people.

So we're not saying I love what's happening right now.

We're not saying I hate what's happening right now,

Although either one of those might be true to some extent.

We're just saying I accept that what's happening is happening.

I fully accept what's here.

I don't need to block it out.

I don't need to block it out.

I don't need to be fully absorbed in something that's difficult.

I can watch and see what's my nervous system doing,

What are the thoughts generated around it.

Then let's take a few breaths.

Let ourselves breathe out any tension,

Any contraction.

If you want to move your body a little,

You could do that.

You could lift your shoulders as you inhale.

Move around.

Come out of the inquiry for a moment and notice what was your experience in the last several minutes.

Is there something that came to mind where you're feeling kind of stuck?

I know this is happening and I know I'm supposed to accept it,

But I can't.

It's awful.

It's not right.

There's too much pain there.

There's so many things that are true and yet here it is.

And the very least that we could do in any situation,

Especially when we're feeling like it shouldn't be the way it is,

There's something too difficult here,

Is to be aware as much as we can.

We can dip into this mindfulness and then we could offer some kindness and compassion.

Here I am sitting in this practice and we're looking at this suffering that happens when we don't accept that what's happening is happening.

That doesn't mean anything else.

It doesn't mean we aren't inspired to change or to work for change.

It doesn't mean it's right what's happening.

It just means it's happening.

And here I am working with that.

And I could really notice that some parts of this are difficult for me.

And could I offer myself some space to have a difficult experience with this?

We all have things that we chew on that we have trouble with.

And we're human.

Of course we do.

One of the ways that we're able to be with our reality is that we disconnect from it.

Sometimes we rage against it or we disappear into something else.

We get really busy.

And then here we come back into our body,

Our breath,

And let whatever it is that came through in the last several minutes be as it is,

Really offering ourselves kindness.

And one of the ways we offer kindness is to allow ourselves to breathe and to relax.

Notice your whole body,

Head to toes,

The whole front of your body,

Your face,

Mouth and jaw,

Front of the neck and shoulders,

Down through your arms and hands.

From your face through your collarbones,

Your chest,

Your stomach area,

Large muscles of the legs,

Down through to your toes.

And through the back of your body,

Head to heels,

Back of your head and neck,

Shoulders,

All the way down from your shoulders to your hands.

Back of the head and neck through the large muscles of your upper back and mid back.

And the lower back,

The back of the legs down through the heels into the soles of your feet.

And from the head through the core,

So the top of the head through your brain area,

Your nose,

Your mouth,

Your throat,

Down through the heart area,

The stomach area,

Down through the legs to the soles of the feet.

And what is drawing your attention when you pay attention to your whole body?

Maybe it's you realize you could adjust your pose a little bit and be more comfortable.

Maybe it's that usual,

Your shoulders up around your ears,

You're clenching your teeth.

We could work with that specific area for a moment.

We can notice our breath.

Our body wants to soften and softens more easily on the exhale.

As you breathe in and out,

Notice the sensations of movement in your body,

The movement of air flowing through your nose,

The movement of the stomach area from the diaphragm muscle moving.

Notice the pace,

The continuity of your breath.

If you're holding your breath,

Let it be more continuous.

Take some deep inhales through the nose and long exhales.

Let your body release on the exhale.

Let your burden slip off your shoulders for a moment.

And come back to this whole body awareness.

If you want,

You could bring your hands to your heart and offer yourself another hand.

Blessing of kindness,

Compassion.

We're so hard on ourselves and we cause ourselves so much suffering when we can't just accept that this is what's happening.

And I'm a master resistor on that too.

I really know that this is all of us.

And then when we are able to come into some kind of compassion and give ourselves some space to be human and to experience what we do,

Everything else seems to lighten up a little as well.

Sometimes working with minor things,

When something's happening that I don't like,

It's like,

Well,

Okay,

I don't like this,

That's true.

And I accept that it's happening.

It can be a really deep practice to lean into,

I'm okay to have the responses that I have.

And I can really be present with what's here.

Reviews

Excellent meditation on accepting reality instead of resisting it!

Thank you acceptance of my situation is hard but this has helped me let go and accept I will continue with this meditation 🙏😊

This is a hard thing to do and your meditation really helped. Thank you so much, Lynn. 🙏🏻💚

It is sometimes so hard to accept that life can be hard. This practice really helped, in a very loving what. After the practice I could feel my body shift to a more restful state. Thank you. 💚

Wise and helpful! With the US election next week, I feel a lot of resistance to accepting the real possibility of an outcome that seems unthinkable. Giving myself the opportunity to explore my reactions (instead of pushing them away or turning them into a story) felt like it opened up some space and softened the knots in my stomach. Thanks!