This Too Can Be Here

In this grounding practice Lou offers insight on how to help you be okay with unwanted thoughts or emotions. This meditation will help you create a new relationship with your emotions and give you some comfort & support as you navigate the ups and downs of being human. In the beginning Lou shares his inspiration for this practice from his recent silent retreat.

Transcript

I'd like to start by sharing how this practice came to be.

I just returned from a seven-day silent meditation retreat,

A silence in the fact of no journaling,

No reading,

No writing,

Nothing but the time to really be with my own experience.

And overall,

I have to say it was one of the most beautiful experiences of my life.

The ability to sit and see what my mind does constantly,

To really understand the habits of thought pattern that my mind engages in,

The constant trying to one-up the future,

The anxiety,

The self-consciousness,

All in these habits,

These loops that show up with sometimes the same thought,

But oftentimes they're different thoughts,

But within the same category.

Having that much space to really understand that was really,

Really beneficial in just studying my own mind.

And the practice that we were doing was called Insight Meditation,

Or as many of you are probably familiar with,

The Vipassana,

Which is really kind of a core basis of a mindfulness practice,

Of following the breath and really feeling the emotions,

Feeling what is happening within your body.

It's a very simple practice,

But it's not always an easy one.

And the reason that it's called Insight Meditation is because in that power of presence,

We gleam insight into our own life.

And I tried to differentiate what was an insight and what was just a thought that I thought was interesting.

And I found that for me,

I had two,

What I consider insights on the retreat,

That brought with it a little bit of release and some tears.

So there was one day that there was a lot of tears happening,

And one of them was brought on by the practice that we're going to be focusing on today,

The insight that this too can be here.

And what that means is I was having a thought of something like anxious,

Or something that made me feel negative,

Where I felt some resistance to it,

I didn't really want to have it in my experience.

And just the words just came to me that,

No,

No,

No,

No,

This too can be here.

That I don't have to run from these thoughts,

I don't have to run from these emotions anymore,

That it is okay,

That I can shine the light of awareness,

And that love will give it what it needs.

It's a really,

Really powerful practice.

So today,

That is what today's practice is going to be about.

And just really quick,

One more note,

Because it may offer some people some comfort,

If you're looking to do a meditation retreat,

Is that I actually fainted on our first sit first day.

I've never fainted in my life.

And that really brought me into the experience.

So although it was overall incredible,

That definitely had something to do with it.

But the first day was a little challenging after that happened.

But I just wanted to mention that,

In case you think that I just went there and it was just all bliss and peace,

That we all,

Regardless of our experience,

Regardless of where we're at,

We can always have these different energies do things to our body that we may not expect to see what happens.

So let's go ahead and just get into our practice.

So go ahead and clear out your space,

Or just start to come into your body.

You need to close down the eyes if they're not,

And just come into the support of wherever your body finds itself.

So it could be the support of a chair,

Or your cushion,

Or a bed.

And just come into that physical connection of where your body is supported on the ground,

Where your body is touching the chair or the cushion.

Where other parts of your body are touching your body,

Either your legs crossed or hands on your thighs.

Connecting to some of the inner senses.

And seeing if you can just allow yourself to be held,

To feel held by support of your cushion or your chair or your bed.

And to be held maybe in the larger sense of the energy that's floating around you that you may not be able to see.

Or feeling held by the people in your life that you know,

The people in your life that maybe you don't even know.

All with a similar intention that you have.

So take a few more moments here just to allow yourself to surrender into that support.

So we're going to practice,

A really core practice in the beginning of our meditation,

And then kind of weave that into the insight that I just shared.

So we're first just going to find our anchoring point within our breathing.

And there's three points that I will offer you,

Either through the nose,

The chest,

Or the abdomen.

And as we just pass through each briefly,

Notice which one feels best for you right now.

So begin by simply following the breath in and out through your nose.

Feeling the sensation and the cool air from the outside come in.

And the warm air from the inside move out.

Just take a few inhales and exhales following that in and out through the nose.

And slowly start to move that awareness from your nose into the center of your chest.

And feel the breath as it expands the body,

Expands the chest on the inhale.

And then feel the fall of the chest on the exhale.

Just noticing the natural rhythm of breath,

Not really forcing the inhale and exhale in and out.

It might just be a very slight expansion and contraction.

And sometimes the abdomen,

Or excuse me,

The chest,

Or the abdomen may be easier for some because it gets us out of our head and moves us more into our body.

Notice if there's any sense of that from moving from your nose to your chest.

And there might not be.

And then lastly,

We're going to move down into our navel,

To our abdomen region.

And it's the same practice,

Just simply feeling the breath as it moves in,

Feeling the belly,

And feeling it as it passes the air out.

And then think about all of those three,

Which one felt best for you right now.

The nose,

The chest,

The belly.

And see if you can just pick one of those to root yourself in.

And if you get distracted,

Your mind wanders,

That you can come back to this feeling wherever it be.

Let's just stay here for a moment,

Cementing into our centering breath.

I found it fascinating really how simple the practice of meditation and its foundation at a mindfulness foundation is.

Sometimes we can complicate it with lots of other things.

And often it's our thoughts that offer the most complications.

And the Buddha said in one of his main discourses on the foundations of mindfulness that if one breathes in and knows that they were breathing in,

And if one breathes out and knows that they are breathing out,

The entire Dharma will be revealed.

Or another way to say that is the entire truth of your life,

The entire truth of what you're seeking,

Of what we all really want will be revealed.

That is a bold statement in just following your breath in and out.

So you may note already that as you practice doing this,

It's not always easy.

Because we are constantly getting bombarded with thoughts of,

I have to do this,

There's a worry,

There's a planning,

There's a self-judgment,

There's an outer judgment.

And one of the teachings that our teacher offered on this retreat,

Which I found very useful,

Is to practice being a door person.

That was the analogy he used,

That a door person lets someone in and they don't go and hang out with that person.

They stay at the door.

So that's all we need to do,

Is that willingness to be present,

That when we have a thought that distracts us from our breath,

We can be the door person,

We can see that thought as a guest visiting,

Our judgment's here,

Worry is here,

Rumination is here.

Instead of getting caught up in the stories of rumination,

Just allowing the thought power to drop and come back to that anchoring breath that we chose.

And let's just be here for a minute and just practice that,

Giving ourselves this really powerful gift of a trained attention and awareness.

Remember,

Your only job is to find the breath in and out,

Letting the thoughts,

Being the door person,

Letting them pass by.

And let's all take a good and conscious breath in and out.

When I say all,

I just mean me and you.

So we're going to work on dealing with maybe a difficult thought or emotion that tends to come up in our life,

Because there's some thoughts that we can let go easily,

And there's some that have a little bit more of a sticking power.

They cause sometimes an emotional stir within our body.

For me,

I've been noticing the comparison.

If I'm on social media and I'll catch myself comparing,

I'll feel that icky feeling,

My initial reaction is to run away from that,

Is to say that this is not good and it's almost feel bad for myself for even having to feel it,

Push it away.

So I'd like you to think about maybe something that you find that stirs some sort of unwanted emotion,

Whether it be a thought,

It could have been something that maybe you were just thinking about in our little bit of silence.

It could be thoughts of unworthiness,

Shame,

Fear,

Whatever comes up.

And see if you can,

If it's a situation,

Maybe you think about that situation.

It's just a thought,

Maybe you can bring that into your experience and just let's notice where this is kind of manifesting in your body.

See if there's a place that you can actually feel this emotion without getting caught up in the story of what it means.

Just on a physical level,

Is it a chest that's tightening,

Throat that's clenching,

Belly that feels a little nervous?

And again,

Just using that core of our breath to be with this part of our body,

To be with this emotion.

And I invite you the insight that I was given,

That came to me.

And instead of wanting this to be over,

Instead of saying,

Oh,

This too shall pass,

As we often tend to hear.

What if you say,

This too can be here?

This too can be here.

Oh,

My fear,

My worry,

My shame,

It's okay.

This can be here.

Just notice if there's any difference in your feeling in allowing it to be here.

And there might not be.

Let's see if that light of presence and love and care that you're caring for this feeling,

You're caring for this emotion right now by allowing it to be here.

Like a friend who came to your house who needs a place to stay.

It's okay.

They can stay.

What we learn is this power to not change our experience,

But to learn how to be free from whatever experience happens.

Because we all have these negative feelings that come up.

We all have these icky feelings that we don't want to feel,

That we're shameful of feeling.

It's just part of being human.

Every single person that you'll see today has had these same emotions.

And this practice is about not running from them anymore.

About inviting them in.

And with our hearts,

Showing them the love that we all deserve.

So take a few more breaths here,

Sending any other forms of compassion or nurturing you can give to this feeling.

Not needing to run from it anymore.

Knowing that we all have difficult emotions,

We're all just really doing our best.

It's one thing I realized when we got to talk afterwards in this retreat that everyone was going through similar experiences,

Or everyone was having different doubts,

The things that were coming up.

That we're all just working at this one day,

And we all just want to be happy.

So from that heart space,

Wherever either your breath,

Whether it was at the nose or with the abdomen,

Let's just see if we can bring our attention to that heart and chest space.

Let's just send out some loving kindness to everyone.

To everyone that we know,

Everyone that we don't know.

And to ourselves.

And repeating either out loud or silently in your head,

Or just listening.

May we all be happy.

May we all be healthy.

May we all find joy.

May we all be free.

And may we all be at peace.

May we all be happy.

May we all be healthy.

May we all find joy.

May we all be free.

May we all be at peace.

And just feel that love going out to everyone,

Because doing the work on yourself,

Setting this time for yourself,

Is having an impact on every single person that you come across.

Take one last cleansing breath in,

And let that all go.

And just begin to come back to that foundation,

To that sense of being held in your space.

And then,

Whenever you feel ready,

Open your eyes and come back into this day.

And I hope you maybe can take that practice with you as you go out through your day,

And if something comes up where a negative emotion is stirred,

Or something that you'd rather not be there,

Maybe inviting that praise,

Now this too,

What if I say that this can be here?

How is my relationship to it then?

I always thank you for your attention and for practicing with me.

If you've been on a silent retreat and you have your own experiences,

Please,

Please,

Please feel free to make a comment.

I read all of the comments,

And I reply to most of them.

So if you are wanting to share your experience,

I'd love to connect.

As always,

Much love,

And Namaste.

Reviews

Lou I think you are amazing. A calm force in my life, making me feel lighter and that I will get through this. Thank you. Sending you much love from Jo'burg, South Africa.

I loved the purpose of this meditation on being present with my current feelings. There was a deep sensation of acceptance without judgment from my mind. Thank You for your kind words.

First meditation I’ve done in a while, and it being this track was so necessary. Thank you Lou 🙏

This was perfect timing for exactly what I needed…permission to embrace those uncomfortable thoughts without feeling shame. Thank you 🙏

This was like a comforting breath of Spring air. THANK YOU ♡.

Really good for me today. Experiencing physical symtoms of anxiety, seemingly without provocation. I want relief of course, but instead said to myself, ok, you can be here too. I’m grateful.

Just what I needed. This too can be here. Namaste 🙏🏼

Thank you so much for sharing and teaching us your experiences. 🙏🏼🙏🏼

This was really powerful. I recently lost a pregnancy and have really struggled with how afraid I am of the pain. I had to work myself up to even try this. But it helped. It helped a lot. Thank you for helping to make my pain easier to carry. Bless you Lou. Big hugs.

Thank you for showing me a way to accept what I do not want to accept, I will come back to this guidance and use this as my mantra ❤️

IT was very helpull. Thank you very much.

This helped me be with some challenging symptoms and reminded me of the humanity in the struggle. Thank you!

Really calming and reassuring meditation. Lovely message, I always feel better allowing rather than fighting against unwanted emotions or sensations, but so easy to forget to allow it in without judgement. Thank you Lou, I would love to do a silent retreat someday but the idea scares me too. I applaud you for making it through 7 days! 😉🙏😊

Lou- Thank you for this meditation.
My teacher shares a similar metaphor... that every thought or emotion which arises can be greeted and welcomed like a guest to your table. That it is more than ok for them to be there, stay awhile, then go. The doorkeeper visual further aided me in my understanding that we aren’t meant to feel blissful all the time. Staying by the door helps us to not get stuck to the thoughts or emotions but allows them to be present...seeing them with some distance helps me with accepting them abs myself.
I’ll surely be checking out your other practices.
In light- Rachel

I was curious by your teacher profile and tried this guided meditation. To me, you transmit a grounded and calming feeling. I’ll listen to more of your work. Thank you and namaste.

Thank you! Very helpful for managing sticky thoughts.

I truly appreciate the conversational technique of this meditation. I found it easier for me to follow through my mental chatter. Allowing myself to sit with the "unwanted" emotions actually helped change the way I have been recieving them; rather than moments of discomfort i need to get away from I see them simply as messengers. Focusing on the physical manifestations was a wonderful way to identify where I have been carrying certain emotions as well. All together, this was extremely beneficial for me and i look forward to returning to this practice. Thank you for your hard work.

Fantastic Lou. May YOU be happy and healthy. Thank you!

Wonderful as always and timely. I've been struggling with a strong emotion lately and fighting the urge to run away from it. I'm going to work on allowing those feelings in and showing them some compassion. Thank you for sharing your insight.

I appreciated the calming energy and the honest truth of your experience. Thank you.