Seek To Understand

This compassionate meditation is a spirited blend of Loving-kindness & contemplative prayer. This peaceful practice helps you to find more love and understanding and helps you to let go of attachment or baggage you may still be holding on to. Included in practice are parts of the "Prayer of Saint Francis". In the first few minutes Lou shares his inspiration for creating this unique meditation.

Transcript

Hello and welcome.

My name is Lou and today's practice is actually inspired by something that happened in someone else's life.

So it's not really my story,

But it is my experience of this story.

So I'll give you some context.

My girlfriend is a yoga teacher and she was substitute teaching a yoga class at a studio that she doesn't really teach at often.

And she had been teaching for two weeks in a row at this class.

And at her second time teaching,

She had a woman sitting in the front who was at her previous class,

Who when she saw that it was her teaching again,

She asked in front of the entire class,

Are we actually going to flow this time?

Right?

In this kind of condescending tone that she didn't like her style,

I guess,

The previous class.

And you know,

My girlfriend was a little bit taken aback and she's a physical therapist.

So she knows the body pretty well and she just teaches in her own way.

And she told another class this and just explaining that,

Hey,

I'm going to teach my class.

So when my girlfriend gets home and tells me this automatically,

You know,

We're just like,

How rude is this person?

Like how rude can you be to not respect that this is the teacher and this is the class?

This person doesn't even know yoga,

Doesn't even know the true meaning.

They're just going there for an exercise.

And we're kind of like bashing this person.

Like they don't really understand the whole purpose.

And then later on that same day,

I was reflecting because the experience was really triggering for me.

Like I kept thinking about it,

Kept feeling like anger for this woman.

Like I wanted to tell her what I thought.

And then I realized that no,

No,

No,

No,

It's not her that is not understanding yoga right now.

It's actually me.

And it's actually my experience of what I'm doing to her.

Me judging her actions is exactly what she is doing.

So I am no better than this woman.

And once I realized this,

I kind of paused for a little bit and said,

How can I make,

How can I feel better about this?

What's,

What is actually going on here?

And it reminded me of,

Of one of my favorite prayers and a prayer that I repeat to myself often at least one line of it.

I almost repeat to myself every single day.

And that is the prayer of St.

Francis.

And there's one line in the prayer of St.

Francis that this reminded me of,

And that is seek to understand rather than be understood.

And in judging this woman,

I was trying to have her understand us,

Having to understand like that's rude.

How can,

How do you not get that?

So I flipped it and said,

Well,

How can I understand this woman?

What might she be going through?

Maybe her life is so chaotic,

So crazy that she looks forward to that hour of flow yoga that she looks forward to each morning.

And that's just her like saving grace.

And because she didn't think she was going to get it,

She was fearful that she wasn't going to have a good day.

Or there's a million other ways to try and understand where this woman is coming from rather than go automatic reaction judgment towards her.

So that's really what inspired this practice.

It was an understanding that we seek to understand and it's really kind of the core of a loving kindness practice of,

Of seeing someone else and wishing them happiness,

Trying to understand it.

So it doesn't kind of fill up us up,

Excuse me,

Fill us up with that anger or weird emotion.

So today is going to be a mix of a recitation of the prayer of St.

Francis.

We're going to use some of the lines in our meditation and also going to kind of practice more of a loving kindness.

So I call it a mix of a prayer of St.

Francis meets loving kindness meditation.

And if you're not feeling kind of right that we are going to do a Christian prayer,

If that doesn't kind of sit with you,

That then you have been forewarned and this is probably a good time to shut the recording off for those of you that want to be open,

Whether you're Christian,

Whether you're Jewish,

Whether you're Muslim,

Whether you're any of the different religions,

Buddhist,

You know,

We can learn from these core kind of mystical spiritual teachers in all these religions and I love doing that in my own study.

So go ahead and let's begin today's practice.

Just start to kind of ease in,

Move the body in the way that feels like it needs to move.

I just kind of went from a rapid me talking to,

You know,

Us kind of going a little bit more inward.

So shift whatever needs to be shifted in your own awareness,

In your own feeling of the body.

And then just allow yourself to find a few of your own breaths to open and create space and as well as to settle and to ease and to soften.

I'm just taking a few rounds just like that feeling the expansiveness on each inhale and feeling the rootedness on each exhale.

Start to come into your own center of being.

The core of your body,

Maybe it's the core of your heart.

Some place where you feel like you try to connect with a higher power,

Where you feel is the place where you speak from,

Whether you do have a prayer practice,

Whether you just talk to God or you talk to the universe or whether you just listen.

Where is the deep,

Where is the center of that place within your body?

It could just be the center of your body in a mindfulness practice,

Right?

We're just noticing and listening.

I'm going to go ahead and share this prayer very gently modified.

Just allow it to fall on your body,

To fall on your spirit.

Make me an instrument of your peace.

Where there is hatred,

Let me so love.

Where there is injury,

Pardon.

Where there is doubt,

Faith.

Where there is despair,

Hope.

Where there is darkness,

Light.

And where there is sadness,

Joy.

Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console,

To be understood as to understand,

To be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive,

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned.

And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

I want to repeat a few words from this prayer because I think it's really the essence of a loving-kindness practice.

May I not so much seek to be consoled as to console,

To be understood as to understand,

To be loved as to love.

So that's what we're going to work on now.

Loving,

Consoling,

And understanding both others and ourself.

So take a breath in with me.

Go ahead and bring your awareness to yourself,

To your body.

And just with your intention,

See if you can find some sense of consolation,

Some consoling,

Some understanding,

And of course,

Hopefully some loving.

Holding yourself in this light,

If it feels right,

Maybe even placing a hand on your heart and a hand on your stomach,

Feeling that sense of being held.

Feeling that understanding for all of the difficulties,

The struggles that you go through.

Only you know what it's like to be you,

To see through your eyes,

To love with your heart.

So giving ourselves that understanding and that love.

And welcome to repeat this out loud or to yourself or just listen.

May I be happy.

May I be safe.

May I be joyful.

May I be at peace.

May I be happy.

May I be safe.

May I be joyful.

May I be at peace.

May I be at peace.

Maybe repeating one of those that feels right for you or something else that you need right now in this moment.

It's really the core of this practice of learning to understand ourselves more and give to ourselves that which we need.

Wish for ourselves,

Pray for ourselves.

Pray to understand ourselves deeper.

So if there is any prayer or wish or thought that you'd like to share here,

More than just what I offered,

Maybe help with a specific circumstance.

Since we did start with a prayer,

Maybe there's something that you could bring up and allow out in this moment.

And let's take a breath in.

And let that go.

Now bringing to mind a loved one.

Someone you care for that could use your understanding,

Use your love,

Your consolation.

Bringing this person to mind and giving them that love that we give to ourselves.

May you be happy.

May you be safe.

May you be joyful.

May you be at peace.

May you be happy.

May you be safe.

May you be joyful.

May you be at peace.

Repeating one of those or anything else that you'd want to say or even wish for this person,

Pray for this person,

Any other form of seeking to understand,

Giving them understanding,

Giving them the love.

Maybe just saying,

Hey,

I see you.

I got you.

We're on the same path.

I got you.

Just taking a moment here.

And we're going to move on.

And this time someone you have a hard time with or feel has wronged you,

I'd like you to think about.

So for me,

This would be thinking about this woman I feel was rude.

Who is someone in your life that you feel maybe some sort of animosity to or you have some unease in easy emotions towards.

And if you can't think of someone,

Maybe think of the next ten people that are going to cut you off.

So bring whoever this person or people are in mind.

And again,

We're going to repeat some words from the prayer of St.

Francis.

May I not so much seek to be consoled as to console,

To be understood as to understand,

To be loved as to love.

Can we console this person?

Can we try and understand their situation?

Probably they are just doing the best that they can with what they know.

That's all they can do.

Thinking of them and repeating again,

May you be happy.

May you be safe.

May you be joyful.

May you be at peace.

May you be happy.

May you be safe.

May you be joyful.

May you be at peace.

And just notice if sharing that with someone that causes you some sort of negative emotion,

Notice if it's just seeking to understand or sharing those words,

If that changes any of that feeling.

Maybe it doesn't forgive them for something,

But maybe it forgives or might forgive them.

Maybe it just gives you the opportunity to not hold that emotion within you.

And there might not be any change,

Just noticing and breathing.

And if there's anything else that you'd like to say to this person,

Share with this person,

Take a moment to take a breath.

And let's take a breath in and let that go.

And thinking finally of everyone,

All loved ones,

All people,

All things,

All living and nonliving.

And wishing this idea of understanding and consolation and love for everyone.

May we all be happy.

May we all be safe.

May we all be joyful.

And may we all be happy.

May we all be and know deep,

Deep peace.

It is in giving that we receive.

It is in pardoning that we are pardoned.

And it is in dying we are born to eternal life.

And when you feel ready,

You can slowly start to come back into your body and come back into the room.

And roll out your body or move your body in any way that feels good.

You can begin to open your eyes.

And thank you so much for really kind of experimenting with me,

Using these different traditions in one practice.

And I think there is value.

I think all of these traditions are speaking to that same truth.

I think if you've connected deep in a meditation,

You already know that.

If you enjoyed meditating to that prayer,

I actually have a meditation on here with that name,

The Prayer of St.

Francis.

And we kind of go deeper into each line and meditate entirely on the prayer.

So definitely explore that if you enjoy that.

And on a side,

Just because I kind of enjoy listening to this on my own,

But if you like that prayer,

I think there is also a beautiful song by,

I believe it's Sarah McLaughlin,

Where she sings the prayer.

And it's really beautiful.

So definitely check that out.

And I hope to see you soon on another practice.

Please always feel free to connect,

Leave a comment.

I love reading them and I love to kind of see your experiences of some of these practices.

Much love and Namaste.

Reviews

This is very beautiful. It introduced me to the golden syrup of forgiveness, which will now flow abundantly as I seek to accept. Thank you.

Very thoughtful 🙏🏼thank you

I loved this. Really encouraging and strengthening. I work in acute healthcare and at times the magnitude of what we see at present can feel overwhelming. Thank you for the kindness and the reminder of the tremendous gift of compassion. Many many thanks and a virtual hug.

So soothing- thank you 🙏

Loved to hear your personal context for the meditation. Thank you.

just what I needed to hear. thank you so much

Thanks Lou, that was such a beautiful meditation. I am off now to find both the prayer and the song. I am going to write the prayer out and give it prominence in our home for my amazing 3 girls and hubby to contemplate on. :-) I am not Christian and have never seen this prayer. A truly beautiful practise for life. Thankyou again for your gentle and loving meditation.

My cat is dying and last night she showed a new sign that indicates the end. It’s tough but this meditation was just what I needed this morning. The “dying - eternal” line was super healing. And you repeated it toward the end which made it feel the universe was giving me a reiteration. As always thank you 🙏🏾 9/15/19 had to listen again. Thank you 10/10/19

A wonderful gift. We thank you. 🙏

Peaceful. I did this at the beach.

Thank you Lou. I was recently introduced to “agape”, and I have been struggling with it a bit. This was very helpful in my pursuit. 🙏

Exactly what I needed. Beautiful and thank you.

I really enjoyed this ... it was sweet and tender .. I love this meditation as a practice to prayer
Thank you for your calm and sweetness through out

Fantastic message! Namaste 🙏

Beautiful and wise meditation, Lou. You modeled how to seek understanding and how to reach peace which I think are important for us to learn. You set ego (anger) aside which opened the way to enlightenment. Thank you for offering us your journey. ❤️

Lou good meditation! Blending traditions is beautiful we are all on the same path. Rudy

Beautiful!!! Thank you 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

I’m a Buddhist that grew up Southern Baptist... didn’t know how much I was missing this prayer, thanks for giving it back to me (headed to the deeper dive version). Thank you.

This was fantastic I love how you talked about a personal situation and made it relatable , and thank you for mention your other meditation and the prayer I’m going to look for it now 🙏

Thank you for the beautiful gift I received this am. It was what I needed and brought me to a very peaceful place. A great way to start my day. 🕉🙏❤️