A Better Way To Practice Gratitude

This inspiring short talk discusses a way to practice gratitude without needing to compare ourselves to others. Gratitude is one of the best practices to bring more happiness into our life, and this insight provides a helpful perspective to take full ownership of our thanksgiving.

Transcript

Hello,

I want to share a little bit today about how we look at gratitude.

We've all heard this before.

Be grateful for what you have because there are people living with less.

At first glance,

This sounds normal.

If you're listening to this on a smartphone,

You probably have more than most people.

There's a lot we can be grateful for.

But is relating it to others the best way to do it?

As a rule,

Anything that involves comparing ourselves to others is rarely healthy.

When we compare in the lens of gratitude,

We're practicing guiltitude.

We're consciously or subconsciously guilting ourselves to feel thankful.

During the pandemic,

I heard people say,

I should feel grateful for my job because others lost theirs.

What if they don't actually feel grateful?

What if their job is killing them and they hate it?

Gratitude is not an obligation.

Bypassing the feeling because they should feel grateful is not helping the underlying issue.

The real power of gratitude lies in feeling the energy of appreciation at the core of our being.

From there,

We know viscerally the blessing of what's holding our attention.

The thing with guiltitude is we can't know how others,

Quote unquote,

With less,

Actually feel.

Happiness is not measured by what we have.

Everything is relative.

Everything is subjective.

We might be suffering with depression,

Yet trying to be grateful because we have more money than some people,

While all the while,

Those people may actually be doing much better than we are.

If anything,

Our gratitude should be compared to ourselves.

In December and January,

I had a bout of insomnia which gave me a new understanding and appreciation for a good night's rest.

I could never feel the gratitude that I have now by just thinking about being grateful for sleep because others can't.

I needed to have the challenge myself.

Let's stop feeling the need to be grateful because of someone else's perceived suffering.

Let's be grateful because it's a beautiful emotion that leads to well-being.

Let's be grateful because each moment is precious and an opportunity for us to celebrate the fullness of life.

Let's be grateful for what we have,

Period.

While there's nothing wrong with practicing gratitude in comparison,

It's much better than being dissatisfied and resentful.

This way is more empowering.

But don't take my word for it.

If your gratitude practice has always been thinking about others who have less,

Try focusing solely on yourself,

Keeping the gratitude emerging from your own experience.

If you want a meditation to help,

One of my most popular ones on Insight Timer is called Morning Meditation,

Gratitude and Abundance.

And it's a nice shorter one from me to help you bring in that gratitude into your life.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on this little share.

I know this might be different or you might have different thoughts around it.

So please feel free to share.

I love to read comments and get a chance to engage and hear different perspectives as I like to share what I feel is sometimes different perspectives.

As always,

Thank you so much.

One more thing,

If you're on Insight Timer and you use circles,

I'd love to invite you to join mine.

You can just search Lose Circle on the app and get to join a beautiful community of people that we have on here.

So I thank you again for taking the time to listen and as always sending so much love,

Support and guidance on your journey.

I hope you get a chance to connect again soon.

Namaste.

Reviews

Thankyou Lou for shifting my perception of gratitude 🙏 your words land with an ease of understanding 🫶

I agree. Comparison is not gratitude. I also try to avoid negative things to be grateful for. Saying I am grateful for good health not grateful I’m not sick if others are ill is an example of this.

Very interesting and helpful perspective… agree that gratitude can be generated independently, though I realize I do amplify it when I think about the reality others may be dealing with.

Sending gratitude for this inspiring reminder, cheers Lou! 💚

I love this little talk. I've never heard gratitude described in this light. Your explanation has changed my point of view on how to approach gratitude. Thank you.

I feel as you do .Thank you.I feel that just by looking or hearing something from someone else that is indifferent or less than me and me saying I am grateful that I'm not in that situation is completely judgemental.I have been literally homeless and with my partner at the bus station years ago and I am grateful to be out of that situation with a wonderful home now.To just say I am thankful for not being homeless without the experience then I don't find that it is relatable to anyone.You must have had the experience to be grateful to not be in it or in it.You can not look at someone and say I'm grateful that's not me .I follow a man who is someone you would think has less by his attire( society's opinion ) and his look . Many say I'm grateful to not be in his situation.What they don't know is he is so rich he could do,buy ,or own anything in the world.He is a famous man ,who is an artist on Porsche cars .He actually does all his work on the details without precision,just by sight alone when altering the car.He is amazing but it's like you said,how do you actually know what someone has. So I am with you on the view that as a rule comparing to others is not healthy and can make you look ridiculous.Thank you for this and I love to hear different views as well.This was great ...Much Love and Peace ❤️✌️ Also to just be grateful from the energy of our core being is more powerful to me .

Absolutely bang on, I spend lots of time trying to explain gratitude to people who don't obviously get it. They always ask how can other people feel gratitude who are less fortunate than themselves, and that's exactly it!! They are comparing themselves to others, and missing that it needs to come from within. Thank you. Namaste

Totally agree Lou. Feels more heartfelt to simply appreciate abundance in all its forms...and to feel it from the heart ♥

Yes! Helpful, insightful perspective. There is danger in comparison! I liked the share about your struggle with insomnia. A good night’s sleep is worthy of gratitude.

A nice way to shift my thoughts about gratitude. Thank you!

This was so awesome! Gratitude is an attitude not a comparison.

Lou,
You hit the target here...
appreciate the key to flipping my attude toward practising gratitude.

Christine Verzuh
High Desert Sierra
Colorado

I like this approach to gratitude since I reflect on what I have been given, what I lost and what I have left.

What a beautiful perspective in gratitude.
Thank you 🙏🏽

Love it and yes I very much agree 😇 gratitude comes from the heart and is an internal experience .. when I practice gratitude- I am grateful for people in my life but there is no comparison as it’s truly the “ thief of joy ” - gratitude comes from the heart and radiates outwards . Thanks 🙏🏻 love your meditations

Lovely gratitude practice! Before bed, I'll either write in my journal or silently name 3 things that have happened or that I've experienced during the day that I'm grateful for. Added bonus: this helps me be more present during the day. Namaste beautiful souls. 🙂🙏💜🕊

Love this concept. Guiltitude! Some how I always knee that was true.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING YOUR JOURNEY AND WHAT YOU FIND WORKS BEST WHEN EXPRESSING OUR GRATITUDE TO THE INFINITE, TO THE DIVINE.

Appreciate the different perspective on gratitude, Thank you 🙏

Wise words to just be greatful for what you have. There will always be others with less and others with more, but their experience doesn’t add or subtract from my experience, my life.