The human brain is wired for separateness and is always vigilant for intruders into our space.
As children,
We develop a sense of ourselves that comes from how our parents talked about us and to us about us.
Many of us have been wounded and we protect ourselves through strategies we've built,
Pleasing others to like us,
Judging ourselves and keeping ourselves on a tight rope,
Obsessing about our looks or withdrawing from relationship.
There are many more strategies,
But these strategies,
Although they protect us from others,
They also keep us from being in touch with ourselves and tend to cover up the best of ourselves,
Our own natural presence.
We will begin a journey now to a sense of wholeness and acceptance of ourselves in this very moment of our lives.
Positioning yourself in dignity and wakefulness with a straight back and a grounding through the feet on the floor,
Allow the eyelids to slowly come down.
Take a few full breaths and hear the out-breath leave the body through a gentle blow through the lips,
A shh.
And hearing this breath,
Allow it to calm you as you would imagine a mother calming her baby.
So breathing in,
Allowing the belly to expand on the in-breath and breathing out.
All the way through before taking a new breath.
Allow yourself to now feel a sense of deep comfort arising in the body.
Check any areas of holding and release through the shoulders now and the jaw.
Just drop down.
Let yourself release into a wakeful,
Relaxed,
Calm presence and allow a vision of yourself to come to mind as a child,
Maybe five or six years old.
See what you're wearing.
See what you're doing.
See the child you were and see yourself doing something that you enjoyed doing.
Maybe coloring,
Playing with a ball,
Making something.
See your young child and see as you look at your child.
You can see yourself in there from here,
From this observer place.
What are the characteristics of your child you still recognize?
Curiosity perhaps,
Excitement,
Maybe shyness,
Bewilderment,
Openness,
Closeness or protection.
Just notice as if you are an observer of this child from behind a mirror.
No judgment.
Just take it in,
Look and listen in on your child.
Now see if you can connect with the goodness in this child,
With the innocence,
The brightness and spark of this young child at play absorbed in the moment.
And now,
Recognizing the you in that child fully.
You have been you,
Your whole life.
You have a core of goodness that was there then and is there now.
There is a way that you know this and know this now in your bones.
And taking a deep breath in and breathing out and just focusing again on the breath,
Moving in and out of the body.
Now calling to mind a picture of yourself,
A vision of yourself,
An image of yourself as a teen,
Maybe 16,
17 years old.
See how you are dressed and see what you are doing that brought happiness.
Maybe skating,
Reading in your room with your favorite blanket,
Just letting an image of yourself as a teen emerge and hold it in your mind's eye.
And step back into the observer place behind that mirror and observe,
Hear and listen to your teen.
As adolescence tends to be a difficult time,
Notice perhaps what confusion you had,
What you longed to figure your way out of,
How you perhaps felt stuck and unsure.
Just be now with your teen as though you were getting to know this person who is becoming you.
Allow what comes up for you to surface,
Holding this image of your teen and his or her inner dimension in your mind's eye.
And notice the goodness that was there and the longing to be seen and heard and respected as good and capable in your own ways.
And now,
Recognizing the you in that teen fully,
You have been you your whole life.
You have a core of goodness that was there then and is there now.
There is a way that you know this and know this in your bones now.
And breathing in and bringing full awareness to the breath now and just letting the vision of yourself as a teen fade into the past.
And now recalling yourself as a young adult.
What were you wearing?
How did you look at your first job or in college?
Seeing that young adult and finding what it is you enjoyed spending time on and seeing yourself perhaps enjoying a hobby.
Notice how immersed you are in it.
Even if it's just visiting your favorite beach or place.
Just seeing your young adult there and seeing the goodness,
Feeling the goodness.
And stepping away and observing from behind the mirror again.
What do you see?
Happiness?
Fear?
Shyness perhaps?
Just notice some of the characteristics of your personality that were prominent then.
And notice now how you have been you your whole life.
There is an essential quality that has been there looking out from those eyes and trying to understand the world from those eyes all your life.
You have been you your whole life.
And know that now in some deep way.
And feel it in your bones.
And breathe in and letting go of the breath letting the image of your young adult recede into the past.
Rearriving in the next breath and in this time now this moment that you find yourself in your own internal space.
And in contact with your history and personality and fundamental essence.
You have been you your whole life.
You have developed strategies for being loved and appreciated in a culture that doesn't allow belonging without expectation.
And now in a deep way begin to know that the thoughts that take up space in your mind about how you're doing.
Those thoughts that contain self judgment and commentary are not you are not your fundamental essence and do not represent the best of you.
These thoughts do not touch into your natural presence.
The you that you have been all your life.
They actually separate you from that you.
And that you that authentic you is here that you is located in your wise heart.
That you is the you who has seen the struggle and the joy and the fear and the growth.
That you is always with you.
That you is worthy of respect and care from you.
That you is whole and solid and unwavering.
That you wants you to be present in your life to be present with your life whole and beautiful.
Like a mountain which sees the seasons change and weathers the storm.
Always remaining solid and real in the face of it all.
Welcome to wholeness.
Welcome to your best most healthy self.
In a moment you will hear the bell to end this practice.
Thank you.
