This practice is called the self-compassion break.
It was adapted from Dr.
Krista Neff and Dr.
Chris Germer with their permission.
This meditation practice illustrates how we apply the three components of mindful self-compassion,
Which are mindfulness,
Common humanity,
And self-kindness,
Especially when difficulties arise.
You can use this compassion break at any time and during any situation.
Once you've practiced going through the three steps,
You can take your time and sit with each step in the meditation,
Or you can do it in a mere moment during a really stressful situation at school or at home or wherever you are,
Whenever you're experiencing a challenging moment.
So to start this practice,
I'm going to invite you to actually think of a difficult situation in your life that's causing you some stress.
It could be a health problem,
A relationship problem,
It could be a work problem or perhaps a problem with a friend that's also struggling.
But when we're starting to first bring self-compassion into our life,
We need to not jump to the hardest problem in our life.
So please choose a mild to moderate situation,
One that's not overwhelming,
Since we want to gradually build this resource,
But also one that does create some discomfort in your body.
If many different scenarios are running through your head right now,
Just choose one.
Just choose one to work with this practice.
We can come back and do the other ones another time.
Once you've chosen,
Please visualize this situation really clearly in your mind.
Seeing if you can feel some of the discomfort in your body as you bring up what's going on in this situation,
What's being said,
What's happening.
Really allow yourself to feel a bit of that uneasiness.
Once you've identified the situation,
We're going to go through three different steps.
The first step is to just try saying to yourself in a real kind and gentle tone,
This is a moment of difficulty.
This is mindfulness,
We're just inviting an awareness of how hard it is into our body,
Into our mind.
Perhaps there's other words that may feel better just like,
Oh,
This hurts.
Yep,
This is really stressful right now.
But just giving yourself permission to really notice what's going on.
When you think of this difficult situation,
Really bringing in that mindful awareness.
This is a moment of difficulty.
Now try offering yourself and again that lovely kind tone these words.
Difficulty is a part of life.
This is that component of common humanity.
It might sound instead something like,
I'm not alone,
Or everyone experiences this just like me.
Or perhaps this is how it feels when people struggle this way.
Really reminding ourselves that it's okay to be a perfectly imperfect human being and that suffering is a part of just being human,
This common humanity.
Again,
Difficulty is just a part of life.
And then the final step.
Perhaps when you're ready,
If it feels right to offer a hand to your heart right now just to bring some warmth and sort of kindness,
Affection to your body.
Could be a hand to your cheek or any other soothing or supportive touch.
But in this last part,
Finally try saying to yourself in that lovely gentle tone,
May I be kind to myself or something like may I give myself what I need.
This is that third component self-kindness.
Perhaps there are other words of kindness and support you might need to hear.
Especially as you're going and imagining this really difficult situation,
This challenging situation.
Maybe you offer yourself the words like,
May I accept myself just as I am?
Or maybe even may I begin to accept myself as I am?
May I forgive myself?
May I be strong?
May I be patient?
May I know I'm loved?
If you're having some difficulty finding the right words,
Imagine that a dear friend or loved one is having the exact same problem as you.
What would you say to this person?
What simple message would you love to have just delivered right to your friend heart to heart?
Seeing if you can offer that same message to yourself.
Again,
As you offer this message,
You may just want to bring your hands to your heart and feel the warmth of your hands or adopting any other supportive touch.
Just reminding ourselves of these phrases.
This is a moment of difficulty.
Difficulty is a part of life.
I'm not alone.
May I be kind to myself?
May I give myself what I need in this moment?
Just absorbing all those words and recognizing how they feel as you hold them close to your heart,
Knowing you can come back to those phrases anytime you need to whenever you're in a difficult situation,
Whenever you're experiencing difficult feelings.
Thank you for practicing with me.
