People have always found it strange when I begin a conversation with this question.
Isn't it interesting to think there was a time as a child that we were picked up and put down for the very last time?
My peculiar statement is often met with some very blank expressions,
But the concept of it has never failed to interest me.
In fact,
There are many things we did as children that at some point became the very last time we ever did them.
Like climbing a tree,
Making up a play,
Or playing whatever game it was that we grew up with in the playground.
And if we were to sit and reflect now,
We would be able to compile an extensive list of things we did,
Said or experienced for the very last time as adults too.
I believe if we were to really grasp this concept,
It would enable us to become truly present in each moment we experience,
As we don't know if and when it may become our last.
When my darling Nan was approaching the end of her life,
I regularly went round her house to perm her hair.
After washing it for her,
She would sit as I would delicately wrap her hair around each roller.
Sometimes we'd listen to music,
Sometimes we'd be in silence,
And sometimes we'd be nattering away.
I can still remember the feel of her soft mousy hair,
And the view of standing behind her whilst she trusted me to do something she herself could no longer do.
Leaving her house and driving back to my own,
I had no idea that that time was going to be the very last time.
If I had,
I would have taken my time,
I would have soaked up everything in those moments before that last roller went in.
Maybe I would have stayed for another cup of tea,
Or maybe I would have held onto her a little longer when we said goodbye.
But what a beautiful lesson in the practice I call,
The very last time.
This practice requires intimate and peaceful moments of examining an instant you are in or a person you are with.
Here's an example.
Whilst my partner is silently reading his book,
I'll soak up every aspect of him.
From the way he turns a page,
To every detail,
Every line and every hair on his head,
As if it might be the last time I ever got to see him in this exact moment.
This practice has not only taught me that this moment is all we truly have,
But it's also taught me a vast amount about gratitude.
Gratitude for these moments,
Gratitude for these experiences and above all gratitude for this life.
What this practice is not,
Is morbid.
It is not an invitation for fear or panic to take a seat at our table.
There is no space for that here.
This practice instead,
Teaches us about gratitude,
Contentment and the opportunity to live an abundant and full life by finding presence in every single moment that this precious life has to offer us.
I invite you to take a breath here.
Now really take a breath and feel the softness ripple through your body as you release.
You are here.
There is life within you.
You may experience moments like this one again,
But you will never experience this one again.
When you allow yourself to fully experience each moment,
You are training your mind.
This is mindfulness.
So,
Can you keep this mindfulness with you as you go about the rest of your day?
Perhaps as you stand up from this practice,
Or as you make your cup of tea as you walk from one end of the room to the other,
Or as you engage with a loved one?
Be in that moment,
For no other moments matter.
Thank you for being here my friend and I will see you next time,
Unless this time is the very last time.
