This exercise is called the self-compassion break.
Because it's portable,
It can be used in daily life when you encounter difficult moments.
You can do it in a slow way as a reflective meditation,
Which we'll do in a little while,
Or you can do it in the heat of the moment.
I invite you to think of a situation in your life that is difficult,
That is causing you stress,
Such as a health problem,
A relationship issue,
A problem at work,
Or perhaps a friend is going through a particularly difficult time.
Choose a problem that's in the mild to moderate range.
So play out the situation like a movie.
What was happening?
What were you doing?
What were you worried might happen.
So maybe you're noticing some stress and discomfort arising in your body.
So the first part of the exercise is to recognize that this is a moment of suffering.
This is mindfulness.
Being aware of how you're feeling in the moment.
And you might find some words that acknowledge how you're feeling.
This hurts.
A simple ouch.
Or this is stressful.
And the second part of the exercise is to remember that suffering is a part of life.
This is common humanity.
Perhaps some words like,
I'm not alone.
Or you may like to say to yourself,
We all struggle.
And this is how it feels when people struggle in this way.
Remembering that when we feel like this,
We're not abnormal,
And there's nothing wrong for us feeling like this.
I invite you to use a physical gesture of self-compassion.
Putting your hands on your heart,
Feeling the warmth of your hands,
The gentle touch of your hands on your chest.
Using a soothing touch that you know works for you,
That feels kind and reassuring.
Saying to yourself,
May I be kind to myself?
Are there any other words of kindness or reassurance that you need to hear right now as you're going through this difficult situation?
Perhaps you might like to say,
May I accept myself as I am?
May I learn to accept myself as I am?
May I forgive myself?
May I be strong?
May I be safe?
If you are having difficulty finding the right words,
Imagine that a dear friend or a loved one is having the same problem as you.
What would you say to this person?
What simple message would you like to say to them,
Heart to heart?
With their words that arise spontaneously,
Can you now offer them to yourself?
Letting go of the practice,
Can you allow yourself to be just as you are in this moment?
This practice can be done at any time.
To recognize that there's a moment of suffering helps us pause and not react,
Making things more difficult for ourselves.
Can we remind ourselves that we're not alone,
That all people feel like this at times,
And we bring kindness to ourselves in the moment?
