Doubt What You Know + Release Resentment

This is a 13-minute guided meditation to bring insight into the root of resentment. I believe this to be true. But what is truth? If we doubt what we think we know to be true, will it help us to let go of our want to resent? A Japanese poet, Haruki Murakami said, “Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional." Are you choosing to suffer? Seneca, a Roman Stoic philosopher believed that we suffer more in the mind than in reality. Where does it hurt?

Transcript

Hi,

My name is Karen and this is an Insight Moment.

I'm asked often how to let go of anger and resentment.

And I think that it is our attachment to feeling righteous that builds a space for us to hold such toxic,

Poisonous thoughts and emotions.

And it is these very thoughts of entitlement to be right that stop us from being able to move forward.

We insist on holding onto our sense of being wronged.

And in holding that sense of being wronged,

We further suffer,

But at our own hand.

Seneca,

A great philosopher,

Said that we suffer more in the mind than we do in reality.

I think this is very true.

I have found in my own life experience that the more I think I know,

The further I am from the truth.

And truly,

The more I think I know,

The more I understand that I am a fool.

I know nothing.

Those things that we believe to be true are based on a singular perspective,

And a perspective which is very likely guided by a blinkered understanding of what is actually happening.

Not intentionally.

We arrive to any experience with some underlying bias,

And we see it from a very limited space.

We see only what is exactly in front of us,

With no understanding of the complexities that might lie beneath.

I remind my students often of something that Confucius said.

The truth has four corners.

As your teacher,

I give you one.

For myself,

I find that I'm constantly searching for truth.

And the best and easiest path I can find to truth is to release what I feel is known.

I come from all space as a student,

As best I can,

With a very open mind,

And a very strong suspicion that I truly know nothing.

Regarding the idea that the truth is a four-cornered square,

I believe,

In fact,

That the truth would therefore be found at the dissection point if you drew a line from one corner to the opposite corner,

And then from the opposite direction.

However,

That makes a very bold assumption that there is a static understanding that this is a one-dimensional thing.

In fact,

I don't think that these are static moments at all.

All truth is understood within the concept of the moment.

If we assume,

In fact,

That it is not a square,

But instead the points of the corners are now moving all about as though you had wrapped string or elastic band around a nail,

And rather than tacking it into the board with a hammer,

You simply kept moving it and pressing it into the wood or the press board.

Therefore,

The lines which cross are moving all the time,

Just as truth does.

Let us further on that assumption build.

If this is not actually simply four corners,

But in fact,

To the right and left of each corner is another point of perspective of truth.

And to that another and another,

Until in fact,

It is a beautiful circle constantly moving,

Sometimes oval,

Sometimes almost a flat line,

But in constant play.

Now,

Building on that theory,

Assume that it is not a singular flat surface.

We already know that there are two sides to every paper.

In fact,

I would argue there are six.

Let us now assume that it is a circular sphere,

And around that sphere is a perspective,

Constantly moving and changing.

How will you find the truth then?

And how can you be certain that you have the truth?

Even if for a brief moment,

You glimpsed at it or felt it?

Why are we so very willing then to assume that we have the truth or that someone else does?

We can only assume that at any given moment,

What we had may have been truth,

But in a flash of light,

It changed.

And it is our desire to hold that moment as though we understand it to be a permanent situation.

But the one constant in this life is change.

An irony,

Really,

Isn't it?

The constant is change.

And yet that is what life is.

It is constantly in flux,

Constantly in play.

And there is no grand agenda of the universe.

The universe,

Like us,

Simply strives to continue.

We in consciousness of self,

Give those events in life context to either hurt,

Help,

Hinder,

Or assist.

In a moment,

Our essence is born without a sense of self.

Our awareness of self is learned through interactions with others.

We are born into whatever circumstance without a sense of entitlement.

We become aware of our basic needs to be fed,

To be sheltered,

To be safe.

We quickly learn of the importance of other to fulfill our need.

And other and need becomes intertangled into a relationship of love.

Rewarded or punished,

Identity built on this relationship,

We very quickly discover our essential need to be accepted and found worthy,

To be held in high enough esteem,

To be loved and cared for.

When was it,

Though,

That we began to see other as a threat to our acceptance,

Our being found worthy?

Somehow we began to see that any of their needs being met were at the expense of our own needs being met.

And in that moment was born the idea,

The notion,

Us and them.

Or perhaps more to the point,

Me or them.

In an attempt to be accepted and welcomed by other,

We separated from other.

And in that space of competition and fear,

Resentment grew.

It was the natural child,

The natural flower of that soil,

So toxic.

Ignorance breeds fear.

Fear breeds resentment,

Animosity,

And anger.

Hate.

All that can grow in the poisonous soil of fear is nettles and thorns.

Poisonous.

Toxic.

And the more we demand to be loved,

The less lovable we become.

Our birthright,

If there is one,

Is to learn that we are born worthy and to strive to live our best life,

A life of compassion and kindness,

A life of love.

You may wonder how this applies to you.

How can you let go anger and resentment?

By simply acknowledging that you do not necessarily know the truth.

All suffering is chosen.

When you choose to suffer,

You are choosing to see yourself as a victim,

As someone who is wrong,

Or as though your entitlement has been denied.

By acknowledging that none of us can truly understand the inner workings of the truth,

It is a mystery.

If you ask yourself,

Am I not more deserving of this than someone else?

Wouldn't you then have to also look back on your life and ask for every moment that happenstanced in a way that benefited you,

Were you more deserving of that than someone else?

The universe is far too busy with existence to worry about the bounce of a ball in one direction or favour of another.

Were you to demand the universe to set your account straight?

Would you be willing to go back through all the pages of your accounts and settle the account truly to the decimal point that you think is right?

To notice every decision,

Every serendipitous failure and success,

Every green light.

Are you so certain that you would be content with the ledger?

The most that any of us can strive for is a life of contentment,

To have our needs met and to be satisfied with what we have.

If you truly wish to be happy,

Give up this belief that you know.

Give up a sense of entitlement that you feel.

Instead,

Open your eyes to the many gifts and blessings and balls that bounced in your court.

See that you are enough and worthy,

That you are born enough and worthy,

And that ever you shall remain enough and worthy.

Choose not to suffer.

Choose to give more,

To feel more,

To love more,

To laugh more,

And to acknowledge that all of these things that you are feeling,

You are choosing to feel.

They are all a reaction to what you believe is the truth.

Question that and you will be free.

Reviews

Beautiful. First time I've listened to her. I will listen to more as she makes sense, to me! Lovely voice. I feel much calmer, and grateful now ☺️

Powerful food for thought! Thank you 🙏🏽 Namasté 🪷🧘🏽‍♀️

This speaks to exactly my situation. Thank you so much for an enlightening perspective 🙏

Superb insight. Thank you.

I’ll come back to this!

Amazing!!! Exactly what I needed! 🙏🌈🌟🍀🥰 So grateful you are on my path today!

much needed perspectives on truth and the arrogance of believing we know it intimately; the compulsion to create rigid definitions to approximate control over an uncontrollable change wired into our very being is the epitome of suffering. grateful to have listened to this, and I’m looking forward to finding deeper humility and serenity by questioning what I believe to be “truth.” 😌🙏🏾

Profound, so much to unpack here. Thankyou

So very true, or what I am able to consider as true! Thank you for that deep insight!

Enlightening

Powerful! Thought provoking and calming. Thank you. I don’t think I would go back for too many crazy wonderful balls have bounced in my court!!!
In gratitude,
Patricia

There is so much rich content in this audio that it's definitely going to be a re-visit for me. Truly appreciate these messages today; perfect timing. Thank you for the wisdom 🙏