How To Actually Let Go

We hear it all the time among motivational speakers and spiritual teachers, that we have to "let go". Yeah, easy in theory I guess. But when has anyone ever mentioned the practice of letting go? If I need to let go, what do I actually do? If letting go was a cooked meal, what ingredients do I need? What is the recipe? In this podcast episode, I share seven ways (plus one bonus way!) to actually put the art of letting go into a step by step effective practice.

Transcript

Hello,

Hello and welcome back to my podcast here on insight timer.

Thanks so much for joining me today.

So today we are talking about how to actually let go.

Like how,

Like how do you let go?

Like I feel like we're always told when things happen.

Oh,

You have to let go or let go and let God.

Okay,

Boo boo.

I hear you boo boo.

I hear you,

But how like what do I need to do so that I can let go?

Like what is like what is the stamp like?

What's the first step in letting go?

Let me ask you,

Do you know what is the first step in letting go?

I'll wait.

Right,

That's my Jeopardy music.

Look,

I feel like we may not have the answer for that because we're not really told how to let go.

We're just told in theory,

Yes,

Let go.

And actually I will say some folks may say you need to give it time.

Let time be the aspect to allow you to let go.

And I will say that that is partially true.

Time does help.

However,

Time does not only help.

And time is actually not as effective as we may always think.

Here's an example.

The saying goes,

Time heals all.

That's not true.

Time heals a few.

Because if we look at the physical body as an example,

We know that the physical body has the opportunity and the chance and the ability to heal itself.

We know this to be true.

You get a paper cut,

You don't do anything to it.

It might sting for a bit the next day.

But after two weeks,

Three weeks,

There's nothing there.

Nothing is gone.

However,

If that paper cut is not a paper cut and it's more of a big gashing wound,

By two or three weeks,

You might be dead.

Because blood is just overflowing and your body's losing blood.

So we know that time can heal a few things,

But it can't heal all.

In the case of the paper cut,

Yes,

Time can heal that.

In the case of the big gasher wound,

Time plus rest plus also adding pressure and also wrapping it in something is effective in helping that heal.

In the same way,

A lot of us are walking around with not just paper cut emotional,

Mental,

Spiritual wounds,

But we're walking around with big gashes of emotional,

Mental and spiritual wounds.

And we think time will just heal it all.

It's not.

Time is just one aspect.

If you were like majorly violated,

You need more than time.

You need other things to help you overcome and to successfully heal from these past traumas in various ways.

So in this episode,

I'm going to be sharing seven steps plus a bonus one to help you truly let go effectively so that you can heal and move on with your life.

Okay,

So here we go.

Here's the first one.

First one is intention.

Intention.

So literally setting an intention that you are letting this go.

And the intention can just be simple as like,

Okay,

This thing happened.

I'm feeling this way.

In this moment,

I intend to let this go.

In this moment,

I intend to let this go.

In this moment,

I intend to let this go.

And just keep saying that over and over.

And that helps and like saying it in the present,

You know,

Not saying,

You know,

I will let this go.

I will let this go because if you keep saying,

I will let this go,

You will always be letting it go in the future if you keep saying will.

So keeping it in the present and using your intention to let it go.

I mean,

That's a very sort of simple,

Easy way to do that.

So that's one is intention.

Like just intend to let it go.

Second,

Another one you can do is pray.

So for those of us that have connections to God,

To the universe,

To a higher being,

A higher power,

That which is higher than ourselves,

Or you know,

You want to focus more on like the highest version of yourself,

Perhaps your soul,

Your spirit,

Whatever you connect to.

When you pray,

You can pray and ask for this thing,

These feelings,

These emotions,

These thoughts,

These whatever,

To like let go and ask God the higher self to do what it needs to do so that you can let it go effectively.

Now let me let me share this and this this is not what the podcast was going to be about today.

But this is where we're going.

Let me just share this this little tidbit.

When it comes to prayer,

And maybe this will be another podcast,

But let me just plant this seed.

When it comes to prayer,

We have we've been having it wrong the entire time.

We've been having it wrong.

Let me tell you why.

When people pray,

They throw every and anything at the prayer.

Pray for this,

Pray for that,

Pray for this person,

Pray for this opportunity,

Pray for this relationship.

They throw everything in a prayer.

Prayer is effective.

Prayer works.

However,

Prayer is deeply connected to vibration.

So whatever level you are vibrating at when you pray is essentially the thing that creates that connection or spark between yourself and your higher self and God.

Here's the thing.

When you pray for,

Let's say,

10 things in one prayer,

What you're doing is you are essentially trying to trying to you are trying to switch your vibration 10 times within one prayer.

Now,

Unless we are a massive spiritual guru,

Master,

Praying,

Meditating on in the Himalayas,

Most people,

99% of people cannot change their vibration consistently that amount of times within a short period of time.

So if your prayer is like,

Say,

One minute,

Two minutes,

Maybe three minutes,

Maybe even five minutes,

And you're praying for 10 things,

I guarantee all of your prayers are not getting to where they need to get to because the vibrational switch from one ask or one request to the other isn't able to happen as seamlessly.

And when essentially when you pray,

When you're shooting the energy up towards your higher self towards God,

You're shooting the energy up.

When you switch and you go to a different ask or different request or different vibration,

You're not giving that first thing you pray for enough time for it to fully reach the universe to reach God for you to then ask for the next thing.

So I always tell people when you pray,

Pray for no more in one sitting.

Pray for no more than like two things in one sitting because the energy,

The vibration,

It needs to have enough time to shoot up and to answer it in the way that you need to get answered.

When you're praying for a lot of things,

It's harder to do.

Anyway,

Again,

This is not my intention to do this for this particular podcast episode,

But I'm making maybe another podcast about prayer and how that works.

So anyway,

Praying,

But like when it comes to letting go,

Praying specifically just for this situation that you want to like release and to let go.

So it's a relationship or an event or a trauma or whatever it is,

But like praying for that and that alone and nothing else within your prayer.

So prayer is important number two.

Third one,

Meditation.

I like to say prayer is talking,

Meditating is listening.

So even in these moments of like deep meditation,

When you have meditative moment in which you're listening,

Sometimes the way for you to let go or the answer for you to let go will come to you in meditation.

Sometimes like you sit in meditation and you intend,

Our first one,

You intend to say,

I want to let this go.

And you sit and you kind of see who waits,

What comes to you rather and you wait and see what comes to you,

What the answer is.

So meditation is our third way to let go.

Fourth way to let go,

Journaling,

Writing it down.

There is power in writing things down.

Let me tell you,

There is power in writing things down and like bringing something like from an ethereal level in the thoughts and the mind,

And then actually like writing that down to make it plain is powerful.

So journaling is actually a wonderful activity that I think we should all be doing in some sort of way daily.

I know Oprah mentions she keeps a gratitude journal and she's always journaling about things that she's grateful for every day.

So journaling is like major.

So like journaling about what you want to let go about your experience,

About what you're feeling about,

What your thoughts are and using the journaling as a way for you to let go,

Just to get it out.

Because I realized for me,

Like when it comes to like emotions or thoughts or just like other stuff that might bother me,

Sometimes it's just important for me just to just like get it out.

So whether that's writing or journaling,

Whether that's like talking to the person or persons that I might feel offended by,

But like getting it out,

But like getting it out with no expectation of getting something back.

So what I mean is like sometimes if we tell someone something,

Say like you're mad at someone,

I'm mad at them.

I want to tell them,

Give them a piece of my mind and I hope that they,

You know,

That they apologize or better apologize.

No,

No,

No,

No,

No,

No,

No,

No.

We might want that validation from the person,

Right?

They apologize,

They feel bad,

They acknowledge,

Whatever,

Whatever.

But if they don't,

Then you're going to be even more upset and more mad.

I found for me that I just say the thing just to let it go so that the energy is no longer held within my being,

My body,

My mind,

My spirit.

It's important for me to just let it go and just let it out so that it's no longer within me,

Like with no expectation of like what might come back to me from the person or anything.

So it's important,

I would say,

In our process of like letting go and our process of releasing,

It's important to journal and journal is like one way to sometimes get the stuff out so that it's no longer like within you and in your being,

Because it's going from the internal in regards to how you're feeling,

Thinking,

And then it goes towards the external with you writing.

So journaling is great.

So that's our fourth one.

So let's just review.

So our first one is intention,

Setting an intention.

Our second one is prayer.

Third one,

Meditation.

Fourth one that we just did was journaling.

Fourth one is doing an activity.

So what do you enjoy doing?

Like what do you enjoy doing?

I know for example,

My aunt,

She really enjoys crafting.

So for her,

A way of letting go could simply be finding a time to craft,

To do some knitting,

To make some clothes,

To do something that brings her joy,

Her passion,

And use that as a way to let go.

Again,

Setting an intention,

Setting an intention to say,

As I'm crafting,

I'm letting go.

For her,

That'll be her thing.

Maybe for you,

Maybe it's gardening.

You enjoy working with plants,

Using your hands,

Doing that,

Set that intention before you start.

As I do this,

I'm setting the intention to let go.

For someone else,

It might be maybe doing hair.

For someone else,

It might be cooking.

It might be singing.

Maybe it's working out.

Maybe it's dancing.

Whatever it is for you,

Find an activity that you enjoy,

That you like,

And then just set that intention to say,

Hey,

With me doing this activity,

I'm letting go.

I'm letting this all go.

I think in some instances in regards to letting go,

So for example,

I said some people might like doing hair,

Doing someone's hair.

Now,

Two things can happen here.

Doing someone's hair,

It's important for you not to pass this energy to the other person whose hair you're doing,

Because we don't want that.

You don't want the person to feel your energy.

It's also important,

If you're doing something with someone else,

So maybe if you're dancing and you're doing a partner dance with somebody or you're cooking food for other people or doing someone's hair or you're doing something that involves other people,

It's important for you to set the intention to let go,

But to also say,

I don't want any of the energy that's released to go to the other person,

For example,

Or to be mixed in with the food.

What happens is usually is that when you're doing something that you enjoy,

Because it brings you so much joy because you love doing it,

What begins to happen is that the energy,

Instead of it being exchanged to the other person or to the food,

For example,

The energy is actually transmuted because this brings you so much joy.

It's your passion.

Your love for doing it,

The love energy begins to actually transmute the negative energy so that the negative energy is not passed on to someone else.

I would say,

Again,

As I've said this before in many of these other steps,

Set the intention first and then do the thing.

An activity is great.

Let me just say,

Because I feel like I'm hearing some people say,

Well,

How many times do I do this?

How many times do I meditate?

How many times do I journal?

How many times do I do an activity?

I would say do it as often as you can,

But also realize it's important for you to do the thing and then let it go.

For example,

In the example that I gave with the paper cut versus the gashing wound in the physical sense,

If you have a gashing wound,

You treat it,

You have to rest,

But you also have to apply pressure,

You have to wrap it up,

And then you let it rest,

Maybe for a day or two.

Then you might say,

Okay,

Well,

Maybe we need to rewrap it because the gauze is very bloody,

Whatever,

So let's rewrap it so that you don't have a fresh clean wrap,

Fresh clean gauze on it.

You don't necessarily put the wrap on,

Apply the pressure,

And then the next half an hour,

Take that off,

Put in another gauze,

Another half an hour,

Take that off,

Put in another gauze.

You don't necessarily do that for two or three weeks on end.

You don't do that.

It's about doing things in increments.

You do it this one time,

Let it go.

Then come back to it.

In the same way,

With the gashing wound,

You have to also assess where you are.

Let's say,

For example,

You decide,

Okay,

Well,

My activity is dancing.

I'm going to go to a studio.

I'm just going to dance,

Have a good time,

Get to dance.

Then you come back.

Maybe that day after you dance,

You're going to assess where you are.

The next day,

You assess,

Okay,

Where am I?

Then by the third day,

You might go,

Okay,

I'm starting to feel some stuff come up again.

Let me go back and dance again.

I would say you need to assess where you are for yourself to determine how often you need to do this.

I will say that in regards to some of these aspects of letting go,

It's not just one event or doing prayer once is going to fully allow you to let go.

It might,

For sure it might.

But prayer might take a few prayers.

For journaling,

It might take a few journaling.

Why?

Because this stuff is layered,

Y'all.

It's layered.

If you were in a relationship with someone for 25 years and then all of a sudden you break up or they no longer with you,

You think just journaling one time for a half an hour is going to do all the healing?

No,

No,

No,

No.

It's layered.

There's layers to this.

A lot of our stuff,

As I said before,

Is not these paper cuts.

These are bigger wounds that we have to deal with.

Bigger wounds are also layered.

Don't think you're just going to be able to do it once.

Okay,

Now I'm free.

Now I can move on.

It's layered.

It's a layered process.

In the same way,

In order for you to see results in regards to your physical body,

In regards to working out,

Maybe you want to lose weight,

Maybe you want to gain some muscle,

You go to the gym,

Right?

You're going to go to the gym just once for 45 minutes and say,

Okay,

Great.

Now I'm on my perfect sides again.

I'm on my perfect sides.

I got my perfect whatever.

That doesn't happen.

You got to keep going to the gym to get to where you need to get to.

In the same way,

You might have to keep doing these steps,

Keep doing these things to really help you get to where you want to get to in regards to letting go.

Great.

Let's go over our list so far.

We have intention.

We have prayer,

Which is number two.

We have number three,

Meditation.

Fourth,

There's journaling.

Fifth is doing an activity that you love,

Something that you find to be a passion of yours.

Now,

The sixth one is one that maybe we haven't heard of too many times.

This is something called cord cutting.

Cord cutting.

You know,

Like cutting a cord.

This is a technique that I have done and that I do every single day that I learned in energy healing.

I'm an energy healing practitioner in a system called Pranic Healing.

It was created and founded by Grand Master Chobacoxooy,

Who was an engineer actually by trade,

An engineer businessman.

And then after he said,

Okay,

This is great,

This is a good career,

He then went into healing and decided to create his own energy healing system based off of other healing modalities and sort of seeing what worked with these other modalities and figuring out,

Okay,

This is what works in this one,

This works in this one,

And kind of brought them all together to make a really effective codified step-by-step energy healing system.

So there's maybe some other energy healing systems where maybe it's more about feeling,

Intuition,

Or kind of maybe doing the same kinds of things for different ailments.

And in Pranic Healing,

You do a different protocol,

Or there's a different recipe for each ailment that you can think of.

So with this particular energy healing system,

Pranic Healing,

Which it's amazing,

Mind blowing to me,

It's changed my life and blessed me in so many ways.

There's a technique called cord cutting.

So essentially,

You would imagine your dominant hand,

Imagine your dominant hand,

The color of lightning or the color of like an electric spark,

Like that electric violet sort of color,

You would imagine that as your hand,

And you're going to imagine a cord between you and the person or between you and the event,

And imagine cutting a cord between you and whatever else it is.

Because essentially what happens is when you get into a situation with someone or an event happens,

A situation happens,

There are these energetic cords that connect you and the other person or the event,

The situation.

So if those cords are not cut,

The energy is still going back and forth.

Think about it in this way.

I know before we had cell phones,

We had landline phones,

Landline phones essentially connected into the wall.

So imagine that.

Imagine like a cord,

This like telephone cord is like connected between you and the person or you and the event.

And that cord stays there,

Although maybe I don't talk to the person anymore,

The event hasn't happened,

It's passed,

There's still an energetic cord connected between the person.

In the same way,

If you're not using a phone,

Guess what?

The cord is still connected to the wall.

So it's important for us to cut these cords so that the energy is no longer flowing between us and whatever it is that we need to let go.

So this particular technique just requires your imagination,

Visualization,

And imagine your hand as this electric violet color,

The color of lightning or the color of like an electric spark.

And imagine cutting a cord between you and what is it that you want to let go of.

And then after you cut the cord,

You can then put some hand sanitizer on your hands to sort of energetically cleanse your hands or you can use essential oils like lavender or frankincense or tea tree,

Sage,

Those are really good to also cleanse your hands.

Or you can also just go to the bathroom or kitchen or wherever and just wash your hands with soap and water.

Because it's important for you,

You know,

After you disconnect from whatever it is that you want to let go of to then energetically cleanse yourself so that the cord is no longer like lingering even on your hand.

So that's another one,

Cord cutting.

Cord cutting has been powerful for me,

Powerful cord cutting.

And the next one I'm going to share is something called whiteboard wiping.

Whiteboard wiping.

So for this particular technique for this one,

This one really involves your imagination,

Again visualization.

And again,

This one really connects as well to energy healing.

Once again,

I learned this from the Pranic Healing Energy Healing System by Grandmaster Choa Koxxue.

And this one simply,

You would imagine with your eyes closed,

You would imagine a whiteboard in front of you.

You would essentially throw up on the whiteboard any feelings,

Any thoughts,

Any words,

Any images,

Anything that comes to you in regards to the situation that you want to let go.

Throw it up on the whiteboard,

You would imagine your dominant hand again as this electric violet color,

This color of like electrical spark.

And you would imagine that dominant hand as an eraser,

As an eraser in that color of lightning or an electric spark.

And you would just erase that stuff on the board.

Just erase it.

So like 10 seconds,

Maybe 5-10 seconds,

And then that's it.

Then maybe you might want to throw up some more stuff there on the whiteboard.

And then again,

Dominant hand,

Electric violet,

Lightning,

Electric spark,

And erase it.

So actually,

This one,

Why don't we try this one now,

Shall we?

We'll do a very short,

Short test.

So close your eyes.

And I want you to imagine a whiteboard in front of you.

A whiteboard.

And think about one thing that you want to let go,

That you want to get rid of.

Just one thing.

Good.

And now I want you to throw up on the whiteboard this thing.

Any feelings,

Emotions,

Words,

Thoughts,

Any connections to this thing.

Throw it up there on the whiteboard.

Throw it up,

Throw it up.

Good.

Good.

Stop.

And now with your dominant hand,

Imagine that the color of electric violet,

The color of lightning,

The color of an electric spark,

Put your hand in front of the whiteboard,

Start erasing it with your hand,

And now say erase,

Erase,

Erase completely,

Deeply,

Thoroughly,

Erase,

Erase completely,

Deeply,

Thoroughly,

Now,

From me,

My entire being now,

Erase,

Erase,

Erase,

Erase.

Good.

Hand down.

Good.

Let's try it again.

Throw up everything on the whiteboard connected to this thing that you want to let go,

This event,

This person,

Situation,

Whatever it is.

Throw it all up there on the whiteboard.

Good.

Keep going.

Good.

Stop.

Dominant hand,

Electric violet,

Color of lightning,

And go.

Erase completely,

Deeply,

Thoroughly,

Erase,

Erase now completely,

Deeply,

Thoroughly,

Erase for my entire being now,

Erase completely.

Good.

Hand down.

Good.

We're going to do it one more time,

And this time I'm going to help you on my end.

I'm going to assist you with the energy.

So again,

Imagine everything that you want to get rid of regarding the situation,

Thought,

Person,

Whatever you want to let go.

Just this one thing.

Throw it up there on the whiteboard.

You might notice maybe it's a bit less this time,

The feeling,

Which is good.

That's great.

Good.

And stop.

And dominant hand,

And go.

Erase completely,

Deeply,

Thoroughly,

Erase.

I'm helping you here now.

Erase completely,

Deeply,

Thoroughly,

Erase,

Erase with the help of God,

The help of your God,

The help of all the angels,

Erase completely,

Deeply,

Thoroughly,

Erase,

Cut,

Cut,

Let go,

Let go.

So it is let go.

Good.

Hand down.

And notice how you feel.

Just notice.

You might notice maybe things are quieter,

You feel calmer.

Good.

Okay.

If your eyes are closed,

You can open them now.

So that is a powerful technique.

And that's actually a technique I tend to teach in my classes.

So y'all are getting some extra stuff here from me today for this podcast.

But I felt it was important to share because,

Again,

I really don't know anyone that has actually taught the how to let go.

Always hear people say why.

Why do I need to let go?

Because you need to be free.

Great.

I always hear people say you just need to let go because it's good for you.

Great.

Thank you.

I hear people talk about the what.

Why do I have to let go?

I have to let go of this person from my life,

This relationship.

I have to let go of hoping things were better,

Wishing things could have been different.

But how?

Like,

I've never heard a talk about how.

So it was my intention,

Intention,

Our first way to let go.

It was my intention to make sure that I taught you all the how.

And I gave you all some tools and tips on how.

So I was going to give you seven,

Which I did.

And we will review our seven.

Do you remember?

I think you do.

First one is intention.

Second one is prayer.

Third one is meditation.

Fourth one is journaling.

Fifth one is doing an activity.

Sixth one is cord cutting.

And the seventh one is whiteboard wiping.

And I would say after the whiteboard wiping in the same way that you did with the cord cutting,

If you can grab some hand sanitizer and wipe your hands off with the hand sanitizer or use some essential oils to wipe your hands or washing your hands with soap and water,

Again,

Just to like cleanse your hands so that the energy is no longer on your hands.

That'd be great too.

Once you do that activity.

And there's a bonus one here that I want to share a bonus part,

A bonus thing you can add to your letting go list.

And that's to see a professional because we can't do everything by ourselves.

All of us need help to do something in life.

And the fact that we got here to be where we are in this space and time.

When we were younger,

From the ages of what,

Zero to two,

Three,

Four,

Five,

Maybe,

We couldn't do much on our own.

We had to have someone take care of us.

Wipe out poop when we went in the diaper.

Clean us,

Clothe us,

Feed us.

Even if the persons or people maybe weren't the best,

We have issues with them.

They did that at the very least.

They at least allowed you to essentially get you to this point and they did what they could so that you stayed alive.

So even with that,

We need help.

Even in listening to this podcast,

We did not create,

Well,

Maybe,

I don't know,

Maybe you did.

Maybe you did create your computer,

But we didn't create the computer.

We didn't create insight timer,

Or maybe you did if you are listening,

A creator of insight timer.

We didn't create the internet.

But we all need help at some point from other people,

Other minds,

Other spirits to help us on this journey.

With that said,

Sometimes you might need to see someone.

You know,

If you go from a paper cut to a wound or a gash,

But if something is broken,

You have to go to surgery because you need open heart transplant.

You need someone to help you.

So again,

That's the physical.

Some of us are walking around.

Physically we look fine.

We have these emotional,

Mental,

Spiritual brokenness,

Or mental,

Emotional,

Spiritual needs and strong hurts and pains that we really do just need someone to come in and open us up and get the junk out and replace a newness in us.

So go see your holistic wellness people.

Tap into seeing a psychotherapist.

You all need some sort of help.

And I'm glad to be here on insight timer to offer that to you.

So I would say this has been a long podcast,

Which it has.

I did not think this is going to go over 15 minutes,

But it has been at least 35 minutes thus far.

So now 36.

So I'm going to end it here.

Please feel free to leave some comments,

Questions.

I will definitely back to them.

I pride myself in getting back to my students and people that tend to listen to my work here in insight timer.

Also if you like this,

Please give this five stars because this allows other people to find my work with a high rating and also allows insight timer to say,

Hey,

Kadima is doing some great stuff.

I think we should promote him more.

So others consider find out what he's doing.

So thank you so much for listening.

Hopefully you found value in this podcast and until next time.

Bye bye.

Reviews

So helpful, especially the white board which I’ve never done before. Thank you 🙏🏽

I really enjoyed this talk, and found it useful the white board wiping I found really powerful, thank you for sharing this. With Metta ♥️

I actually learned and suggestions are doable. I am a stroke survivor and I was able to visual and understand and connect to your words. I never rate and seldom share from insighter; sharing to 2 friends right now. THANK YOU DO MUCH

Thank you for sharing specific techniques on letting go.

Great ideas/ methods to free ourselves from holding on to hurt, pain & disappointments.... Thank you🙏🏽✨🙏🏽

Dealing with emotional trauma. This was exactly what I needed Thank youuuuuu 🙏🏾

I enjoyed this lesson. Letting go can be very difficult. It opened up my eyes in reaching other avenues.

I’ve listened to a great deal of very good content. on Insight Timer. This has to be one of the best . Kadeema both teaches and instructs. Thank you!!

You are a great teacher on the how to go about a concept

Thank you Kadeem for all your valuable, practical advice on how to let go. I’m going through break up and even thou I understand why this happened, learned the lesson, working on emotions is still so hard to let it go!!!
You put it all together making powerful tool❤️

That was beautiful & amazing! It really resonated with me…no I just have to get to a place where I can sincerely Let Go.

A fabulous set of techniques/steps for guidance in “Letting Go”! 💜🙏🐸

It's so true, people talk about how you should "let go" of things, but not how. Kadeem offers some really practical and valuable ways to do it, thank you!

Great insight & information! Really enjoyed this.