Release Trauma Signals - Stubbornness

Stubbornness often arises as a protective shield — a response shaped by past wounds and the need to feel safe and in control. In this sacred space, we will lovingly explore the deeper layers beneath resistance, inviting grace to soften the edges of fear and rigidity. With the guidance of Higher Consciousness, we will open the heart to trust, surrender, and the gentle flow of Divine wisdom. Allow yourself to remember: your true strength lies in your openness to Light.

Transcript

What a nice gathering that we're all here today.

We're going to hold this space together and really have a lovely session.

We always talk about releasing energy signals that are causing a little block in our pathway.

These trauma signals that have been passed on to us and that are just accentuated because we're doing the life that we're doing.

But my treasures,

Because I do this work such a lot and I read so many energies,

In most of the cases that I'm seeing,

The stories that we think are ours are actually very old imprints,

Trauma signals that have been handed on to us by our ancestors with a little package of kindness,

Not a meanness at all,

But a warning that would say,

If the sky gets dark,

Then run away and find cover.

And if you hear the sound,

Then definitely find a way to do what you need to do to stay alive,

To survive.

So there has been a lot of these survival codes because we know that just being in this existence is very challenging.

So we have created all kinds of defensive mechanisms and systems to protect ourselves.

And so many of those are just no longer serving us.

They've become like walls and barriers.

The worst part is that if we have lots of these signals that have been passed on to us,

The systems that we are holding are running those programs.

Even when we're sleeping,

These darling adrenals are being horrified and terrorized.

We just have to have a bad dream or think of something that's happened during the day and our whole system ignites into a lot of trauma.

So we really are a cocktail of all those stress hormones that cortisol and epinephrine and norepinephrine and all the others.

We are that,

We are that beautiful being,

But we're also filled with the anxiety and the trepidation of just trying to be here and just trying to survive.

But underlying all of this,

There's also a desire to show up in this world in our most excellent,

Unique and delightful way.

And that's what we want to awaken,

Even though this life is very challenging,

Even though,

Even though,

We want to keep saying that,

Even though.

So today we're going to talk about the energy signal that is all about stubbornness.

And it is a trauma signal if we interpret it the wrong way.

If we cause ourselves to come into a downward spiral within that idea or that feeling,

That behavior,

Then we're using it the wrong way.

And just like everything in this life,

There is one way and then there is another way.

There's always a choice.

There's always at least two things being offered to us in every single moment.

And some of you might love to go,

Oh,

Jo,

I don't believe it.

If you're being incarcerated or if you've been injured in some way,

What's the choice in that?

And there is a choice.

And I know it's not a very big choice,

But it's still a choice that holds your sovereignty.

Who am I in this devastation?

And that choice is yours to make.

Oof,

That's a hard one though.

I don't wish that for any of us to make and have to find our higher self in the very,

Very traumatizing situations this life is presenting.

So let's talk today about this energy signal of stubbornness and see where we go with that.

We're on a mission to release them one by one.

All the other ones that we've done are posted on Insight Timer so you can go back and you can start clearing,

Clearing,

Clearing,

Clearing.

It's the best thing you can do is to clear the stuff,

The contamination.

We've just got to find a way that works for us.

When we're trying to find a way that works for us,

We truly want to find it in a way that doesn't deplete our energy even more.

So this will be a really,

Really good place for us to play and to connect.

Settle down where you are.

I'm going to bring in this bell and we're going to take some deep breaths.

We're going to open our collective energy and hold each other so gently.

Let's take a deep breath in.

Long,

Slow out-breath,

Oof,

Drop,

Drop,

Drop into this moment,

Release,

Relax,

Drop your shoulders.

Feel the balance of your body on the left and the right.

Make the connection that you have right now through the base of your body or the soles of your feet to whatever part of the earth is holding you right now.

Drop a little bit more of your burdens,

Your weight,

Your troubles into that space.

Lovely you.

And sometimes when we close our eyes,

If it's safe for us to do that,

Just for a little while,

Make that connection with our breath,

With gravity that is holding us,

And find these as our stabilizing forever and ever beautiful connections.

Because if we can always find something that can stabilize us very quickly,

That is gonna help us from not getting into too much of a wobble or wobbling out too far.

When we wobble out very far away from our center,

It becomes very challenging to come back,

To save face and to be able to come back into that moment and just be there just becomes a bit tricky.

Just stop,

Take a breath,

Anchor yourself in the space where you are,

Connect to the absolute assurance that you're being held,

That gravity is holding you,

And the breath of life is breathing into you,

Your heart is beating,

And all those things are happening whether you are paying attention or not.

Find something in your life that will help you to connect to those few little things.

And then if there is a picture,

A sound,

Or color that you can add to this and start to build upon it,

That at any moment when you need to very quickly come back to an inner connection,

You can either connect with a mudra,

Picture that color,

Or sing that song in your mind,

And find yourself back in your center.

When we do this,

We want to claim that this is me here right now.

And find that for you.

This is me in my space right now.

I'm being held and loved.

And one more thing that I've been wanting to say to myself many times in the day is that I am in the divine design.

I'm in it.

And if we're in the divine design,

Surely my treasures,

We can allow ourselves to feel a deep sense of trust and love.

If we know that there is a divine design,

Which there absolutely is,

We're not gonna get too much evidence of that when we see the ridiculous human stories around us.

But just look at nature.

Look at that which is unfolding around you,

The predictability and the steadiness of the ebb and flow,

Wax and wane,

Day to night,

Night to day,

And all the things that are steady and consistent,

Beautiful and gracious.

These are the things we want to anchor our awareness into.

The more we feel wobbly,

The more we want to come back to the awareness that we are in the divine design.

So here we are.

While we're in the space that is holding us,

We ask our angels and guides,

Divine presence,

Come in,

Be with me now.

When you invite your guides and angels,

Divine presence to come close to you,

It becomes a little easier for them to come close because you're opening up your heart to greet a friend.

And we all know how delicious that is.

When a friend comes up to us and hugs us and says,

Oh,

I've missed you,

It's so good to see you,

That feeling of warmth,

Love,

And acceptance,

We must create that connection with our guides.

Come close,

Be with me now.

Whatever will help me and support me,

And whatever will help and support every dear soul here,

Then ripple from everyone that is here into their families,

Into their communities,

Their workspaces.

Imagine how much energy we are using as a connection of light and love.

So we hold this space now,

And we ask that we can start to get some guidance about what it is in that signal of stubbornness that is traumatizing for us.

If you were to ask your beautiful being and say,

But what is it that makes me feel anxious when I'm with someone who's stubborn,

Or when I am holding a very stubborn stance in life?

Notice the word stubbornness always thinks like a donkey that refuses to move.

Do what you will,

But it will not move.

Stubborn,

Gonna stand and hold my space.

I think there's nothing more stubborn than a three-year-old other than my husband and my dad.

I always tell them they are the most stubborn men in the entire wide world,

And I just love them so much.

But that stubbornness,

It's a standing in an absolute.

Can you hear how that could be a wonderful thing,

To stand in your absolute?

But when we stand in a way where it depletes our energy,

It's a stubbornness that does not allow for anything else to come in.

There's no allowing,

No agreement.

There's no kindness in it.

It's a very hard and a very difficult,

Often rejecting,

Defending,

Deflecting,

Denying,

Or distracting energy.

So we absolutely don't want to play in that frequency of stubbornness.

But there is another one where we can hold ourselves in a way that can allow ourselves to be strong,

Forthright,

Determined,

Or courageous.

And I like those words more than stubborn because it makes us think that there is a bit more space.

It amplifies our awareness of ourself when we say that I'm standing in my right.

I'm standing in the agreement of myself.

I'm holding my space with determination and courage.

This is not for me,

And this is for me.

There is a certainty within it,

But there's not a stubbornness that pushes away.

It's a holding of yourself.

So just try and feel that with me now,

Right there where you are in the space that you're in.

Imagine it any way you can,

That stubbornness where you won't let anybody in,

Where what you've decided and what you're gonna do,

You've dug in your heels and you've got that jaw set and you're just not going to move from that position.

Feel what that feels like inside of you when we connect to that energy of stubbornness in that kind of way.

It is so solid,

And it's also so rejecting and pushing away.

We have to defend ourselves or justify or push others away from coming close to us in case we are a little wobbly or vulnerable,

Heaven forbid.

So we put this great big fence,

This wall,

This concrete structure around us,

And we stand in the place that we are.

When the whole body is clenching up and becoming tight within that,

The holding of it,

Trust me,

Your mind becomes tight and locked and blocked as well.

We cannot think of anything that is new or imaginative or creative.

It's very difficult to come up with other possibilities.

When we hold a stance that says it's my way or the highway,

This is the only way it can be.

There's no movement,

There's no progression,

And there's nothing new.

We have been locked in to the systems that have locked us in now.

And we,

My lovelies,

Are locking ourselves in to the systems that have locked us in.

Must I say that again?

We have been locked in to the systems that are oppressing us but we have locked ourselves into them because we are too terrified to try something different,

To step out of the mold,

To break free,

To express ourselves in a different way.

I would love for you to really discern where you are in your life.

If you are in a space where you're feeling like the best you can do is to maintain your status quo,

Nothing must change and no one must suggest any change.

And certainly your family,

Everyone must abide by these rules and these structures,

These systems,

Because this is the structure that is going to help this whole family to stay safe.

And I'm the monitor and the keeper and the jailer of this energy.

I'm gonna keep it and I'm gonna hold it and I'm doing it with love because I want you all to be safe.

But in that,

We are holding each other hostage.

We are imprisoning ourselves and others in a place that becomes so very,

Very tight.

When we hold a hard stance,

It is often because we are fearful or anxious and that is what makes us hold that space even more determinedly.

So can you feel what that energy feels like in you,

My lovelies?

Can you get what that would feel like?

Please tell me that you're not playing in this game.

If you've noticed that you do every now and again,

Notice you in that game in that way.

This is the finest way for us to slip out of a story is to notice ourselves in it.

We have to notice these things in ourselves and we have to be kind to ourselves because,

My lovelies,

They're not our stories.

I really want you to hear that.

These are not our stories.

We have got this protective field that's around us that is trying to help us to survive and to keep safe.

So there's two amazing things you can do here.

And the first one is to notice yourself in it.

Just notice yourself when you find your stance,

Your awareness,

Or the way you're moving or being in the world is a little bit too rigid or controlling or you're shutting down,

You're becoming small.

Notice that.

The moment you've noticed that,

You are already in a different place.

You've stepped one out of the misery and now you're in a good place.

Are you okay?

That's the first one.

And the second thing to really pay attention to is to ask ourselves,

Is the story encoded in the idea of survival?

Is the story encoded in the idea of survival?

And my lovelies,

If there is a coding of survival,

It's going to be a difficult energy.

It's very certainly going to be a downward spiral where we have to defend and deflect and protect ourselves.

And in doing that,

We have to create a rigid space around us.

So those two things,

Notice yourself,

Be aware,

Watch yourself in the process of your journey as you are unwrapping and becoming clear and more aware,

That awareness is your greatest gift to awakening,

To come into a much higher vibration.

When you notice yourself,

You become aware when you notice yourself playing in something that is not so great,

You could be doing a little bit better.

I catch myself all the time,

But I do catch myself.

I don't get myself off the hook because if I don't catch me,

No one else is going to.

I need to be responsible for the way I'm being in the world because I am the me in this world.

So I take complete ownership of that.

And I catch myself out all the time.

It's fabulous.

But when I catch myself out,

Just double check with you.

Okay,

There you are.

Not your finest moment here,

Joy.

What's going on?

Then ask this to your being,

What's going on?

What do I need to protect myself against?

What is this code,

The survival code in this that is pushing away life and pushing away life force energy and making me rigid,

Tight and stuck,

Stubborn,

Locked in?

What is it that's going on here?

The awareness and the noticing and the speaking to myself in this way helps me very quickly to step out the story and come into witness.

When you can witness yourself in your journey,

It's the most delightful journey.

Even though crazy things happen,

Even though this,

Even though that,

And you're witnessing yourself in your journey.

I can't tell you how freeing that is,

But we must train ourselves to become aware and to notice and then to be the witness.

It doesn't just happen automatically.

The default setting is to immediately defend,

Protect,

Deny,

Distract,

Destroy.

That's the immediate default setting.

We might slip into that,

But be kind to you.

I wonder what's going on here.

I wonder what my being is doing around this.

I wonder what inspired this.

I wonder,

And you just keep wondering and unwrapping it and unwrapping it.

So you take control of that story.

It does not take control of you.

Does that feel like something you could manage?

Fear is the feeding food for survival.

It's why we agreed to just try and survive in the very first place.

It was because we were fearful and because we wanted to live.

The will to live,

The wishing to live,

Is a wonderful gift.

But the wonderful gift got a little distorted when we allowed fear to become the thing that would rule our mind,

Body,

And our soul.

So watch that place,

That trigger.

Notice that it comes from way,

Way,

Way back.

Those signals are so ancient and so old.

Notice yourself in the pattern.

I hope that helps you a little bit.

It's hard to break a cycle of survival.

Being the witness.

When I discovered that feeling of being able to step back and be in witness of my own process,

It just gave me so much information.

And if I just sat with it without blaming,

Shaming,

Condemning,

And dropping into guilt,

And stood one away from that as well,

Then the information that comes in is enormous for us,

For how we can operate as we decide to move into our life,

Into the next step of this journey,

And then how to be with others.

This is a wonderful gift for us,

But my lovelies,

We're going to fall down and be dreadful every now and again.

And that's when we want to be kind.

We want to be kind to ourselves and just say,

Oh,

There you go.

Not your finest moment.

Own it and be in it.

Own up that you're not being so great.

Remind yourself that you are paying attention,

That you're not going to be carried away in a thoughtless,

Horrible pursuit,

An aggravation that plummets your energy,

That you're going to be able to step out,

Notice it,

And take a next action that hopefully is more thoughtful,

And that you are more aware of in that next action with a bit of luck.

But if you don't,

And you take two steps out,

And then you're revolting and revolting,

Then own that as well.

Oh my gosh,

Oh my gosh.

And then take a breath and say,

Right,

Now what was that about?

Can you see how we're going to do this?

How are we going to gently,

Kindly release all these triggers so that we're not servants to the story?

We don't hold each other hostage in our pain.

You are in this space.

You and all of us who know stuff and have seen stuff,

Been in stuff,

We are here.

Why are we here?

Because we have these hearts and these souls that are seeking something else.

And that's what we're doing in this world.

That's the expression that we are to bring in,

The something else.

We know something else.

The minute you know this,

You also know that.

Really listen to that inside your being.

You're a magical,

Divine,

Illuminated,

Clear,

Beautiful,

Gracious being.

And doing this journey is giving us a wonderful opportunity to start to see who we truly are.

We've got each other,

My lovelies.

We can do this together.

So much love to you.

Thanks for being here.

I really appreciate it.