As we settle into the awareness of our bodies,
We begin to see more clearly some of the deeply conditioned habits and tendencies and reactions of our minds.
One of these conditioned responses is the very powerful force of desire or wanting in the mind.
As an example of this,
I had an experience which illustrated the power of this particular thought,
Something I call catalog consciousness.
When I make the mistake of even opening a catalog,
I'll find myself turning pages,
Waiting for something to want.
Even if there's nothing in particular that I'm looking for,
The seduction of wanting itself is very powerful.
We want to want.
Place that we can easily see it in meditation is in the expecting mind.
We're with our experience and we're wanting something special to happen.
We want thoughts to become less.
We want to stay longer with the breath.
We want to have pleasant sensations.
As long as we're caught in this expecting mind,
In the wanting,
It prevents us from settling back into seeing exactly what's there,
Exactly what is presenting itself.
Whenever we become aware of the mind wanting or desiring,
Instead of judging it or trying to push it away,
We can make the desire itself the object of our meditation.
You can make a soft mental note of this mind state,
Expecting,
Wanting.
And in that moment of noting,
Allowing the mind to settle back into the experience of the body,
Into the experience of the breath,
Just as it is.
We'll begin this meditation by again sitting in an upright posture,
Gently closing the eyes.
You can consciously relax the eyes,
Soften them.
Sending the jaw and the shoulders,
Softening the belly.
Settling into the awareness of the body and the body posture to sit and to know that we're sitting.
You can gradually become aware of the sensations of your body breathing.
Remember that it's not a breathing exercise,
So that however the breath is presenting itself is fine.
Become mindful of the sensations of your body breathing in,
The sensations of your body breathing out.
Become aware of other predominant sensations that may be calling your attention,
Opening to those sensations.
If the sensations are pleasant,
Notice if there's a wanting them to continue.
If the sensations are unpleasant,
Notice if there's a wanting of them to go away.
When the sensations are no longer predominant,
Again come back to the awareness of the body and the breath.
When you notice wanting or desire in the mind,
The wanting or desire itself can become the object of meditation.
We can be mindful of desire or wanting without judgment.
It's a simple acknowledgement that this mind state is present and an interested investigation of what it feels like.
Wanting feels like this,
Desire feels like this.
We might make a soft mental note of wanting,
Wanting,
Desiring.
A common expression of wanting in meditation is expectation.
We're with the breath,
We're with the body,
And we want something else to be happening.
We want there to be less thoughts.
We want more calm.
When you notice this attitude of wanting or desire,
Again make a soft mental note of it,
Acknowledge it.
Become mindful of the wanting itself.
See how the wanting or desire arises and passes away.
Settle back into the awareness of the body,
Of the breath.
Attention to different sensations as they appear.
Seeing how the sensations themselves come and go.
Being aware of thoughts appearing and disappearing.
And paying particular attention to the arising of expectation,
Of wanting,
Of desire as it may arise.
Making a note of it,
Feeling it without judgment,
And seeing how it arises and passes away like all other aspects of our experience.
Good night.
And when you're ready,
You can slowly open your eyes and reconnect with the world around you.
It's important to include desire in the field of mindfulness because when it arises unnoticed,
We often are simply acting out that pattern of conditioning.
We want to be aware enough to see when it's appropriate to act on it,
When it's more skillful to see the desire and let it simply pass away.
Mindfulness gives us the space of choice.
It offers the space of wise discernment and it creates a space for greater happiness in our lives.
I look forward to continuing with you tomorrow.
