Hello!
Welcome to this meditation to help you get acquainted with your internal system.
If at any moment you start to feel overwhelmed,
I invite you to drop out of the exercise and do what's best for you.
You can also choose to just spend some time with a particular part or parts who might be showing up.
There is no right or wrong way to do this meditation.
I invite you to keep a journal nearby in case you want to take any notes as we go along.
Get comfortable in a way that's right for you.
That might be lying down,
Sitting,
Standing,
Or moving.
You might be still or stimming.
Your eyes might be open,
Soft,
Closed,
Or even transitioning between open and closed.
No one is here to judge how you do it because your way is the right way for you.
Now,
I invite you to breathe in and out normally,
Noticing what's present.
You might want to use your external senses,
Sight,
Hearing,
Smell,
Taste,
Touch,
Whatever's accessible,
To find an anchor in this moment if that feels right to you.
I'm going to give you a few moments to make any adjustments or modifications you need to make.
You can also take some notes about what is or isn't working for you.
Now that you've gotten as comfortable as you'd like,
Try to send an invitation out to your parts to gather around you so you can meet whomever wants to show up.
Each system is different.
People's parts may show up in different ways and may express themselves using any sensory modality.
It might help you to have a visual,
Like seeing your parts gathering in a movie theater,
At a campsite,
On the beach,
In a secret safe underground cave,
Or at an enormous conference table.
Anything's possible in our inner world.
You might perceive them as balls of energy moving around you,
Or have a felt sense of their proximity to you.
Maybe you feel them as bodily sensations.
You might hear them in the form of thoughts,
As voices,
Loud or soft,
As expressions.
You might experience a certain taste or a certain smell that goes along with different parts.
Your parts can show up in one,
Several,
Or all of these ways.
I'm now going to leave three minutes for reflection.
This reflection can happen internally,
You can just stay with your parts,
Or this reflection can happen externally,
Via writing or drawing.
Just notice what's happening for you,
How your parts show up,
How they communicate,
What they are saying to you,
Or how they are responding to the situation.
Whatever you are experiencing here and now is an important message from your parts to you that allows you to get to know them better.
If it feels okay,
Let them know that they are seen by you,
The you of today,
The you who is not a part.
Now that any number of parts may have gathered round,
I invite you to get some perspective on who has shown up.
A lot of our parts are working hard to protect us,
Which sometimes causes them to have extreme behaviors,
Like harsh criticism,
Dissociation,
Numbing,
Intense fatigue,
Addiction,
Just to name a few examples.
But their strategies always come from a place of positive intentions,
Even if we don't understand what those are yet.
For example,
They might be protecting us from the painful experiences,
Beliefs,
And shame held by vulnerable parts exiled within our system.
They might be protecting us from the outside world,
Whose message has been that we are different and maybe even damaged.
They might be justice-minded,
Looking to protect others from the outside world.
They might be implementing preventive strategies to protect us from nervous system overload and triggers,
Which can have so many causes.
They might be protecting us from other protectors because of disagreements around how to best protect us.
A lot of our parts are also holding pain from trauma we experienced in the past or continue to experience in the present.
Sometimes that pain comes from personal experiences,
And sometimes it has been passed down to us through generations.
Right now,
Some of these exiled parts might be peeking out from behind the protectors.
Some might be former exiles who have since released their burdens.
There might also be resource parts,
The ones that hyperfocus,
Encourage us to listen to our favorite song over and over,
Read a special book,
Watch a special TV series.
They might even show up as our favorite characters.
There might be parts who love to play with words and sounds or with movements and stim toys.
Just notice who's here and be with them in this moment.
If it feels authentic,
Thank them for their presence and let them know that you will be getting to know them better in the future.
Let's take another three minutes now to reflect on what you are learning from your parts.
From this place of connectedness with the parts who have gathered,
I invite you to reflect on the qualities of self that you are feeling in the moment,
Even if there's only a tiny sliver of self present right now.
That's okay too,
Because we're always on a spectrum of self energy,
And our specific type of neurodivergence might also shape the degree of separation between us and our parts.
Some of us might have more separation,
Some of us might have less separation.
Many of us have heard about the self's eight C's.
Connectedness,
As I named,
As well as compassion,
Clarity,
Courage,
Creativity,
Confidence,
Curiosity,
And calm.
We may have also heard about the five P's.
Patience,
Persistence,
Playfulness,
Presence,
And perspective.
Some or all of these might have come into play for you during the meditation thus far.
However,
There are other dimensions of self energy that may or may not do a better job of expressing our unique systems.
They might include spaciousness,
Groundedness,
Acceptance,
Unconditional love,
A sense of companionship,
A sense of community,
Having a wider lens or a longer view,
The ability to forgive.
Self could even be associated with a color,
Smell,
Taste,
Or texture.
Essentially,
Self comes down to anything that allows you to be with your parts rather than in your parts.
Think about how this lands for you.
Are there specific qualities that better describe yourself?
If you were to take a snapshot of your self qualities,
What would it convey?
This can serve as a reference point in your healing,
A reference point in your communication with your parts.
Let's take another three minutes now to reflect on how self shows up for you.
We are now coming to the end of this meditation.
If it feels authentic,
Offer up some love and gratitude to everyone inside who has shown up today.
If it feels authentic,
Acknowledge that you can see the hard,
Hard work that they are doing each and every day in the interests of the system.
If it feels okay,
Let them know that you'll come back to spend more time with them,
To get to know them better.
Thank you for sharing this journey with me.
