Cultivating Compassion

Enjoy this teaching on compassion with a guided meditation from Jeremy. Originally given onsite to a group of tech employees, this meditation is profound and will help to open your heart to the desire for all beings to be free from suffering.

Transcript

Cultivating compassion and cultivating compassion not just for others but for ourselves and using this idea of compassion as a fundamental way to interact with those we work with,

Those we love and really everybody in the world.

Compassion I think of as just feeling love for the welfare of others.

It's really about,

It's not just about caring for others,

It's not just really about feeling others pain like empathy.

It's really about connecting with what's deepest within us which is a desire for happiness,

Desire to be free of pain,

Desire to be free of suffering and then recognizing that everyone else has that same desire.

Everybody else has that same right really.

And so it's helpful for us to start practicing opening our hearts to compassion,

Practicing what compassion means and you can actually practice it.

So again it's really a desire,

A genuine desire coming from,

I'd say coming from your heart but coming from deep within to remove the pain and suffering of others to help others as well as ourselves find joy,

Find peace,

Find what we're all looking for in life which is just a sense of fulfillment.

And sometimes this is hard because some people treat us poorly and some people,

Especially when we look at the news and when we look at the world there's seemingly so many people who are in our first judgment,

Bad or stupid or taking us in the wrong direction,

All of that.

But every single person within them has the desire for joy and the desire for happiness and the desire to remove suffering.

And so it can help us to practice compassion and the simple way to practice it is just to ask yourself whenever you encounter somebody,

It's just simply asking yourself how is that person suffering?

What is in the way of that person's joy?

What is in the way of that person's happiness?

And simply just to ask that question from a place within you that strives for the same.

And so as we get better at it we can overcome some of their actions and ways of being in the world that are tasteful or cause us to react to it.

But it's helpful and especially helpful in the work environment to look at each other and look at those you're working with and ask yourself how is this person suffering?

What is getting to them today?

And how can I be a small bit of respite in their world?

How can I just take the situation,

Take a conversation,

Take an interaction and bring a little bit of joy,

Bring a little bit of caring,

Bring a little bit of affection and love for those that I'm working with?

And we want to then bring and expand these ideas out into the world so that we can all feel a sense of caring that we're all here for each other,

They're all here with each other.

Because we all do share the same needs for love.

Everybody needs it.

Everybody needs affection.

Everybody needs the feeling of safety and support.

And at work that feeling of safety and support allows us to be more creative,

Allows us to be more,

You know,

Bring ideas forward that we might restrict ourselves from because of fear of somebody else's judgment.

So it's just about recognizing other people's suffering.

And we're all suffering.

That's the great discovery,

If you will,

From the Buddha,

Which is that everybody,

No matter who we are,

We're all facing stuff.

We're all working through space and time and we're all feeling friction and we're all feeling some kind of challenge to our sense of self and to our ability to be happy and productive and successful.

So today we'll do a little meditation on compassion and bring a little bit of what's called a meta style meditation,

Which is a loving kindness meditation to bring happiness and wellbeing,

Joy and peace to ourselves,

To others,

To those we work with,

Those we love and to everyone really in the world at large.

Because I think if we all look deep within ourselves,

That's what we want.

We want a peaceful,

Loving world without conflict,

Without fighting,

Without inequality,

Without all the stuff we're trying to stumble over and fix if we can these days.

So if you haven't already,

Just find a comfortable spot to sit in.

It's always good to have your back up so your spine can move energy through it.

Get some of those vertebrae open.

Remembering about the belly breath,

The diaphragmatic breath.

As we breathe into our bellies,

We tell the brain that we are safe,

That we are okay,

That it's okay to close our eyes and to go inward,

To bring down the stress temperature and to open up our metabolism to be able to absorb not only food and digest material,

But also be able to take in ideas and work with stuff that we're not normally comfortable with.

So we breathe into our bellies slowly and we breathe out slowly.

And the breathing can gently elongate,

Elongate the in breath,

The inspiration,

And then elongate that exhalation.

And we look,

While we're breathing,

Always good to look for where we might feel restricted.

Now for some of us,

Our diaphragms might actually be quite restricted and it's sometimes difficult to take that diaphragmatic breath.

And so that's just slowly and gently working through that,

Working to gently pull the breath down,

Pull the diaphragm down,

Pull the lungs down.

And then sometimes when we fill our bellies up and then also fill our chest up,

We may feel restrictions in the chest as well.

All good just to notice,

To notice these restrictions,

To notice where we aren't fully open or energy isn't fully flowing.

All of this has information for us in our lives and how we perceive ourselves and how we perceive the world.

So keep taking slower,

Deeper breaths,

Allowing anything that you came in here with just to start to drop away,

You'll get back to it.

It'll be waiting for you.

Sometimes we can just take a pause,

Even though our minds are telling us there's so much that we need to do,

So much to pay attention to,

Stop doing this meditation thing and get back to work,

Get back to what you need to do.

If this,

That you'll be just as productive,

Probably more productive after a break.

Get things done quicker,

Easier,

Calmer.

Breathing in,

Noticing your body,

Feeling into your head and neck,

Noticing the tensions,

Seeing if you can move any of that tension or relax or let go of some of the musculature there.

Just letting it soften,

Noticing all those areas in your personal body where you have restrictions,

Where you have tension.

There's oftentimes a lot in the eyebrows and the eyes and the jaw and the neck,

Back of the neck where the head meets the neck.

Notice all those places,

Allowing some energy just to start moving,

Settling,

Letting go.

Listening consciously,

Noticing the breath,

Listening to the breath,

Feeling the breath,

Feeling in the shoulders and the chest and the back.

Just noticing any of these areas where there's tension,

Where there's upset,

And just allowing that to relax and release.

Going down into the abdomen and the lower back.

And then thinking about those in your life or around you.

Think about those who you're working with.

Ask yourself how they might be suffering.

And open your heart.

And gently,

As you can,

Just bring somebody,

One person into your mind and ask yourself,

What could I do to relieve some of this person's suffering?

What can I do in my interaction with this person?

That would gently awaken their inner spirit.

Taking yourself away from your own needs and the interaction and simply focusing on their needs,

Connecting your heart to their heart.

Remembering that we all share love.

We all share the need for affection.

And that there's really no difference between us at a deep level.

And you may notice there how they are different from you.

And your mind may bring in all the things about them that bother you.

And in this moment,

Allow those things just to be set aside.

Those differences are small compared to what's most important.

And so with this person in front of you,

Just gently give them that sense that you care,

That you see them,

That you wish and will for them to be happy,

Joyful,

And fulfilled.

And then bring in another person,

Bring in a loved one.

Or if you're up for it,

Bring a complete stranger that you've seen somewhere or somebody who's bothered you,

Somebody who's rubbed you the wrong way in the past week,

Somebody who gets on your nerves from time to time.

Breathing in and just looking into their heart.

Recognizing that when they do stuff to bother you,

When they do stuff that seemingly off-putting comes from their suffering,

Comes from whatever it is that they're upset about in their own life.

So breathing in and feeling love for this person.

Opening your heart,

Allowing that person's humanity to come forward and sending them the message that you care,

That you wish for their happiness,

That you wish for peace within their heart.

And that you recognize that your differences are foolish or they're small compared to shared need that we have to care for each other.

Just breathing deeply into your body,

Allowing that transfer to happen between you and this other person.

And then we'll turn this around and look at ourselves.

Ask yourself what you've been doing recently that has been off-putting,

Disturbing to yourself.

Something maybe judging yourself.

You withdraw love and compassion from yourself.

Push yourself too hard.

Judge yourself for doing something wrong.

Help to punish and discipline yourself for not being as efficient or productive as you'd like to be.

And open your heart to yourself.

Recognizing yourself joy and happiness.

Recognizing that you need love.

You need affection.

Feel that opening in your heart.

Allow yourself to be exactly as you are.

Allow yourself to be in the state of growth that you are.

Allow yourself to be imperfect,

Less than you know that you can be.

Allowing yourself to make those mistakes,

To do stupid things,

To say things that you don't mean that may hurt other people's feelings.

Support yourself with an open heart so that you may be better,

That you may speak more clearly from a place of love and kindness,

That you may work with others from a place of compassion.

That you will recommit to yourself to be the best person you can be under the difficult circumstances of your life.

And so in Metta meditation,

Which is a loving kindness meditation,

You can repeat the following phrase to yourself.

May I be happy.

May I be well.

May I be safe.

May I be peaceful and at ease.

May I be happy.

May I be well.

May I be safe.

May I be peaceful and at ease.

May I be happy.

May I be well.

May I be safe.

May I be peaceful and at ease.

Just notice those words and notice how they connect with you.

And anything that comes up while you're saying them.

May I be happy.

May I be well.

May I be safe.

May I be peaceful and at ease.

A wish for joy,

A wish for love,

A wish for compassion to oneself.

And then we can turn that also back around thinking of those we brought forward for anyone else and send that same message to others.

May you be happy.

May you be well.

May you be safe.

May you be peaceful and at ease.

May you be happy.

May you be well.

May you be safe.

May you be peaceful and at ease.

Simply opening your heart to all beings around you.

All beings seek happiness,

Wellness,

Safety,

Peace,

And ease.

May we be happy.

May we be well.

May we be safe.

May we be peaceful and at ease.

May we be happy.

May we be well.

May we be safe.

May we be peaceful and at ease.

Notice anything that comes up and tries to counteract your commitment to these words,

The commitment to compassion for others,

The commitment to a more joyful,

Peaceful,

And happy planet.

May we be happy.

May we be well.

May we be safe.

May we be peaceful and at ease.

Breathing into the belly.

Breathing in some gentle,

Longer belly breaths.

Listening to the breath,

Feeling the breath.

Imagining a world of peace,

Imagining a world of joy and happiness.

Breathing in slowly,

Breathing out slowly.

Trying to elongate that breath in,

Starting to count seconds.

Seeing if with each in breath you can get just a second or two longer.

Doesn't have to be so strenuous,

Just a little bit deeper,

A little bit longer.

Challenge yourself just a little bit to get a little bit more air into the lungs and then releasing for about the same number of seconds.

Breathing in and breathing out.

And I'll allow you to take a couple of minutes in silence and see if you can continue with your breath when you hear your mind dragging you back into its grasp.

Just bring yourself back to the breath.

Just focus on the breathing,

Listening,

Feeling,

Imagining.

Breathing in and breathing out.

Breathing out.

Breathing out.

Breathing out.

Continuing to breathe.

And start gently moving into the closing moments.

Feeling the body,

Feeling the quietness,

Feeling the energy that we've brought into this meditation,

The intentions that we've brought in around compassion,

Loving kindness,

Caring,

Respect,

Honoring the life force within each one of us,

All beings,

All people,

All living sentient beings.

And then we're going to take some bigger,

Quicker breaths to bring in some powerful,

Positive,

Invigorating energy into our bodies so that we can start our day or continue our day with clarity and passion.

So these breaths are to fill up the abdomen,

Then fill up the chest rather quickly and then letting the breath go.

And I'll give you the example.

We'll do that five times together.

One,

Two,

Three,

Four,

Five.

And gently feeling your body wiggling your toes and your fingers,

Noticing the energy,

Noticing who and where we are in this moment.

And if anybody has any questions or feedback from that meditation,

Please let me know.

Think about bringing this meditation into your day.

Think about it when you're interacting with other people,

When you're in meetings,

When you're talking to yourself.

Think about how we can be kinder,

Gentler,

More inspiring to ourselves and others.

And I also encourage you as usual to try to pick this up as a daily habit,

Even for five minutes in the morning,

Especially at the beginning for just about five minutes,

Just to separate aspects of your day to bring your intention towards positivity,

Towards productivity,

Towards joy and clarity.

The more you do it,

The more you receive.

More you give,

The more you receive.

So I thank you all for being here with me this morning.