Channeling Your Bravery With Humor

Episode Eight from the Center the Absurd Meditation Podcast where we engage deeply and mindfully with the silliest and most absurd spaces within ourselves in order to find levity and relief from the pains and stresses of our human existence. Today’s meditation focuses on your personal evolution, confronting fears, old wounds, and challenging circumstances, and connecting with your inner warrior, your source of courage and wisdom.

Epic Music Credit
The Great Battle by Alexander Nakarada

Transcript

Welcome to the Center of the Absurd Meditation Podcast,

Where we engage deeply and mindfully with the silliest and most absurd spaces within ourselves in order to find levity and relief from the pains and stresses of our human existence.

This meditation practice focuses on your personal evolution,

Confronting fears,

Old wounds,

Challenging circumstances,

And connecting with your inner warrior,

Your source of courage and wisdom.

Start by relaxing into your space.

With your eyes open,

Take a look around and notice what surrounds you.

Perhaps you see walls,

A ceiling,

A floor.

Perhaps you are outdoors and see tall trees,

Open sky,

Buildings,

Mountains,

Water.

Know that for now,

You will be held in safety by your surroundings.

Feel the energy wrap itself around you,

Shielding you,

Blocking negative thoughts,

Energies,

And tensions.

If you would like,

Feel free to close your eyes.

Breathe normally,

In and out.

You can trust in your breath.

There is no need to exert effort or intention.

Just know your body will keep breathing steadily.

Again,

Notice how naturally you take in a breath of air,

How it moves through your body and then is released as you exhale.

This visualization will be taking you into a virtual video game.

To start,

You see yourself from a short distance.

You are the coolest avatar.

You take a moment to look at yourself fully.

You select a super rad hairstyle,

Really cool clothes and accessories,

And awesome boots.

You also get to choose to wear body armor or a shield that straps across the front and back of you.

Next,

You select your battle instrument from a choice of several.

You pick something you can carry easily that has multiple features and will be useful for striking from a distance and up close.

You can choose something with magical features,

Something with a sharp blade,

Something heavy and blunt,

Or something that propels objects.

You are in charge and get to choose which instinctually you feel will serve you on this quest.

You are about to enter level one,

The training ground.

You hear music begin to play from somewhere behind you.

And as an ascending bell tone sounds,

You find yourself on an open playing field.

There is a steel barrier a few feet from you.

You duck behind it,

Fully protected,

And take a peek at what's in front of you.

You see five small forms,

Each representing a mild worry,

Fear,

Or emotional hurt scuttering about in front of you.

Each one is carrying a tiny energy blaster.

As you lean closer to get a better look,

One of the figures fires a blaster in your direction and you feel a sharp sting momentarily and see that there is now a small green splotch staining the fabric on your shoulder.

You're okay,

But that kind of sucked.

You realize that even though the hits aren't deadly,

They still hurt and will certainly slow you down or interfere with your progress.

You resolve to do your best to take cover while you work on a plan to eliminate the threats in front of you.

You take a breath,

Raise your battle instrument,

Take aim at one of the figures and let it go.

You see the small figure pop up into the air and then vanish.

Where it stood,

There is now a glowing golden orb of energy.

You really want to pick it up,

But first you better clear out a few more of the figures in your path.

You take aim at a second figure approaching and release.

Your aim is off just a bit and misses.

This is harder than you first thought.

But you're persistent and try again.

This time,

You hit your mark and the figure shoots into the air and disappears.

Now there are two glowing orbs of light.

You begin to notice that a couple of the small figures are moving around rather unskillfully.

Now that you're getting the hang of this,

You recognize there are patterns that make it easier to pick each of them off.

One figure is moving really,

Really slowly.

Another seems to be taking two steps backward for every step forward it takes.

You eliminate both easily.

That's two more golden orbs to collect.

The final figure is moving erratically back and forth,

Aimless and frenzied.

It's firing its energy blaster,

But all of the shots are way off the mark and are missing you by a mile.

Again,

You take aim and with one release,

The final one vanishes.

The battle is over.

A bell rings three times and you step out from behind the barrier.

It is now safe to run out onto the field and collect the five golden energy orbs.

As you pick up each one,

You feel a burst of energy.

Your strength and stamina increase and you are awarded five experience points.

You have leveled up.

You now have three options.

You can end the game here and call it a day.

You can restart the level and practice a bit more,

Gaining more and more experience points for each critter you confront and defeat,

Or you can move on to level two.

If you choose to end the game now,

You may stop this meditation track and replay it again at a later time.

If you choose to replay this level,

Rewind or restart the track from the beginning.

If you choose to advance to level two,

Take a few deep breaths and get ready.

You are about to enter level two,

Team battle.

You are in a large enclosed arena.

Scattered throughout the room,

There are a few small raised platforms onto which you can easily jump.

There are also several glowing light shields behind which you may take cover.

You are not alone.

Standing to the right and left of you are virtual projections of yourself,

Each able to move independently of you.

There is a swell of energetic music,

An ascending bell tone,

And you see three large figures all dressed in the same dark brown uniform entering the playing field.

Each has the same menacing look on its face,

And each is holding a long staff with a sharp blade at the end.

The edges of the blades are letting off blue sparks.

You can't tell exactly how they work or what kind of damage they might do.

You definitely don't want to find out.

The three figures seem to have a strategy.

One leaps onto a platform to take the high ground.

Another ducks behind one of the energy shields,

And the final one sets off on a full speed charge directly at you.

For a moment,

You close your eyes,

Take a deep breath,

And then assume a battle stance.

You are stronger than you were at the start of this game,

And your instrument now has greater precision and increased force.

One of your projection teammates darts to the left,

Providing a barrier between you and the shielded figure.

Your other projection teammate leaps onto a nearby platform,

Drawing the fire from the elevated dark figure and skillfully weaving and dodging to avoid its strikes.

You step forward,

Directly facing the charging figure,

And with incredible accuracy,

You let go.

The figure stumbles backward,

Falls to the ground,

Dropping its weapon,

And dissolves into some kind of sparkling purple dust.

You dart behind the closest energy shield to catch your breath and recharge.

Your teammates run back to join you and are standing guard at your back.

You set your sights on the figure on the platform.

You watch it closely,

Studying its strategy and measuring its skill level.

The figure is aiming its staff in your direction and firing with great accuracy,

But its range is limited.

The distance is too great to actually harm you.

You realize no damage can reach you as long as you remain outside of a 6 feet radius of the dark figure.

Moving carefully,

Keeping an eye on the third figure,

You begin to bob and weave closer and closer to the elevated figure.

Your increased experience and skill points have extended the reach of your instrument,

And once you are about 8 feet from the platform,

You take aim and release.

You see the figure thrown backward off the platform,

Dissolving instantly into a spattering of sparkly purple dust,

Its staff clanging to the floor.

One more to go.

You run backwards to the closest energy shield and duck behind it.

Your teammates are now in lockstep with you,

Wherever you go,

They go.

You know that as long as your team and the final dark figure remain hidden,

The battle will be an endless standoff.

You're going to have to muster the courage to step out and trust your speed,

Agility,

And armor to protect you.

The final figure remains ducked behind the barrier.

You step into the open,

Hoping to draw it out from hiding,

Your teammates at your side.

Just as you hoped,

The figure peeks around the barrier,

Aiming its staff directly at you.

One of your teammates charges the figure,

The other jumps high up into the air,

Sounding a battle cry.

You take the opportunity to drop to your knees,

Raise your instrument,

And let go.

It's a direct hit.

The final figure collapses,

Disarmed,

Into sparkly dust.

You and your teammates high five and jump up and down,

Raising your fists in the air.

You did it.

A bell rings three times.

Your two virtual teammates merge into you,

And you feel your courage triple.

You move toward each of the piles of sparkling purple dust,

And as you pass over them,

You feel yourself grow taller and stronger.

You are now much,

Much bigger than when you started.

Your armor is now much fancier,

Your instrument much more powerful,

And you have gained another three experience points.

You have leveled up.

You now have three options.

You can end the game here and call it a day.

You can restart this level or the previous level and practice a bit more,

Gaining more and more experience points for each critter you confront and defeat.

Or you can move on to the final level,

Level three.

If you choose to end the game now,

You may stop this meditation track and replay it again at a later time.

If you choose to replay this level,

Rewind or restart the track from the beginning.

If you choose to advance to level three,

Take a few deep breaths and get ready.

You are about to enter level three,

The boss fight.

You are on a raised platform,

Surrounded on all sides by water.

You can hear the deafening roar of wild,

Crashing waves below you.

There is no place to take cover.

In front of you,

You see the scariest,

Most hulking,

Repulsive looking beast.

This is your greatest fear,

Your deepest wound,

Your biggest stress.

It appears to be much,

Much larger than you,

Like ten times larger.

You look up and shudder.

This is your worst nightmare.

You move toward the far edge of the platform,

Away from the beast.

You make yourself very small and huddle as close as you can to the ground.

The beast is snarling and stomping its feet.

You see it has razor sharp claws and armored scales.

Every few seconds,

It lets out an earth shattering wail,

Sending fire shooting out of its nostrils.

This is super scary stuff.

You pause a moment to gather your courage.

You remind yourself that you have been training for this moment your whole life.

You have come so far.

You have acquired so many skills and you have become very adept at using the resources around you.

You know that while you are facing this beast alone,

Within you,

You hold the strength of three warriors,

Yourself and your two virtual teammates.

You have learned so much about the strategies your fear and pain use to control and bombard you.

You are much,

Much stronger and wiser than you were when you started this quest.

You have been victorious in each of the battles you have faced.

You are brave enough to face this final boss battle.

When the beast pauses for a brief moment after one of its fierce howls,

You take the opportunity to run at it,

Charging between its feet,

Using your instrument to cut sharply at its legs.

You run back and forth underneath it,

Confusing it.

It is becoming more and more furious,

But it cannot seem to find where you are as you bolt back and forth beneath its reach.

As it spins to locate you,

It is swinging its arms wildly,

Striking out in every direction at once.

It is out of control,

Shooting fire randomly,

Turning and grasping,

But you are dexterous and speedy.

Blow after blow,

You strike at its legs and underbelly.

You are exhausted,

But somehow you muster the energy to continue the fight.

You run full speed out from under the beast and are now standing behind it while it rages and whirls aimlessly.

From this vantage point,

You notice that despite its loud,

Scary noises and towering appearance,

It really hasn't been able to harm you at all,

Not even a little.

You almost feel a bit sorry for it as you watch it spinning and stomping and screeching.

It is virtually powerless.

You raise your instrument high into the air and bring it down with all of the force left in your body.

As it strikes the ground in front of you,

A wave of energy releases and shoots across the platform.

The already frenzied and unsteady creature topples over.

There is a loud explosion,

And when the air clears,

You see there is a bright white bubble of light energy inside of which you can see a shining golden chest.

You move into the light energy and feel replenished and recharged.

You approach the chest,

Reach down,

And flip it open.

A blast of light moves through you.

You have gained invincibility.

You may have to complete additional quests and challenges,

And you may encounter other foes along your path.

Your battles may be tough and daunting.

You may suffer small injuries,

But your wounds will heal quickly,

And you can never be defeated.

You have won the game.

And more importantly,

You have faced your inner demons with courage.

You have fought bravely and wisely,

And you have been victorious.

You are forever changed.

You will never unlearn what you have learned.

You can only advance forward.

You are a warrior,

A champion,

And you deserve a rest.

Set down your armaments.

Remove your armor and rest.

Your work is done here.

Be well.