The Art Of Being Happy Alone

Do you ever feel lonely? We’re mammals after all and we were made to touch, dream, and be together. But we live in a time when many of us feel more alone than ever. You will learn how to be happy when you’re alone. In fact, being alone can be incredibly nourishing.

Transcript

As I love yourself,

I can drop into the feeling of being here and now.

We've all heard those famous words,

We come alone and we go alone.

And even if we feel we are surrounded by a lot of people,

Sometimes we just find ourselves alone.

Even with our family,

We may sometimes observe that we feel particularly alone,

Even in a crowd.

So what is this loneliness and how do I truly feel about being alone?

Being alone is the gift of solitude,

The gift of being with yourself,

Being quiet.

Now feeling lonely on the other hand is what happens when you become uncomfortable with being alone.

And you strive for company,

Strive for stimulation,

You strive for some distraction,

They can relieve you of this discomfort,

This discomfort of being lonely.

And being lonely understandably is not particularly pleasant,

So we try as hard as we can to run away from it.

But ask yourself,

What are you running from and why is it that you feel so uncomfortable?

When at a time we live with the greatest population on the planet,

Why is it that there's a growing pandemic of loneliness?

Why is it then that when we have the maximum amount of sensory stimulation ever in history,

That we still feel lonely?

Why are we so uncomfortable with ourselves to the point that we fear loneliness?

And then how do we overcome this sensation of loneliness and our fear towards it?

You see,

The root of all of this is that we were never taught to be comfortable with ourselves.

You are not taught what to do when we are with ourselves alone.

There's always been some sort of a dependency from the time you were born.

Dependency on your parents,

Of course,

Then your friends,

Partner,

In your marriage,

In your job,

On your community.

And so we've always relied on others to give us a sense of our identity.

You think about it when you are in a relationship,

You're a couple,

You become dependent on one another to the point that if you really look at it,

There's an anxiety about separation.

There's a fear of what would happen if this partner were to leave either willingly or unwillingly.

And there's also the fear that what if this person loves me less or even gives me lesser attention?

So there's dependency and usually the dependency is on both sides.

And this is the root of attachment.

There's attachment to your partner,

To your team,

To your family,

To your nationality even.

Attachment and dependency come together,

They're a package deal.

And when there's attachment,

There is always the presence of fear.

Fear of loss,

Fear of damage,

Fear of isolation,

Fear of separation.

When you embark on the spiritual journey,

When you embark on the path of wisdom,

You'll begin to hear that person security,

Your sense of identity is something that comes from within,

Comes from your own self.

It's only when there's no attachment to anything or anyone in particular,

Can there be the sense of security.

But it's not easy because we weren't really taught this in school or by our parents even.

So I ask that you consider the essence of our being.

To understand this independence,

You need to understand that you're made up of two energies.

There is the material,

Which is the physical form that you can see in the mirror.

And there is the spiritual or the consciousness that feels,

That knows,

That understands.

And we've all learned how to take care of the primary,

The first one,

Which is the material,

The physical world,

Which we all know is dependent on food,

Air,

Shelter and light.

But how much do you understand about your own consciousness,

The non-material?

The truth is this,

The spirit that you are is completely under your control.

But only if you have the level of awareness that allows you to be the master creator of your thoughts,

Your feelings,

Perceptions,

Decisions,

Which then lead to actions.

And yet that's not easy as the very fact we do not feel secure and we are searching for security is a sign that we do not have the level of self-awareness that is the foundation of that mastery.

So what do we do then?

Here's one suggestion.

Notice feelings of self-security.

Notice the time when you feel most secure about yourself.

And you may realize that your strongest,

When you're either openly loved,

Loved by someone,

Or you are loving,

Loving towards someone.

And if you become a little bit more aware,

You will notice that when you gave something,

Whether it was time,

Attention,

Help,

Guidance,

Etc.

,

Without wanting anything in return,

You were naturally loving.

And at a time like that,

You weren't thinking,

Aha,

Now I'm being loving.

No,

You just were.

If you pay attention a little bit more closely to your awareness,

You'll notice that you feel not only good about yourself,

But your anxieties,

Your insecurities begin to disappear.

It's a time when you feel like you have value.

You're bringing value to someone else.

And that's a state that's very natural.

And if you go even deeper,

You may become aware that there is a feeling of freedom of spirit.

And in that state of unconditional love,

Your heart begins to soar.

If you're ever a parent,

You know what I mean.

Because parents have this relationship with their newborns.

A time of giving unconditional love without expecting anything.

And when you're in that state of love,

There's a sense of security for yourself.

You're no longer seeking,

You're no longer needing.

You're not dependent on someone saying that,

I love you.

But if they do say that I love you,

That's great.

But we don't need that to feel good about ourselves.

Because you have found a state of being within yourself that is loving in itself.

And when you express that state,

You feel at your very best.

And what's ultimately happening at that moment is that you're realizing for yourself that love is what you are.

So a connection is being made.

When you are being your natural loving self without needing to think,

You feel secure within yourself.

Dear ones,

Ultimate security for every human being is love.

And I don't mean the love of another,

But the realization that love is what I am,

Followed by an expression of that state.

And if you're wondering,

After all this,

If love is what I am,

What is love?

It describes a state of consciousness,

The highest state of being.

And it's interesting because this highest state of being cannot be known,

Felt or understood unless we express it in action.

Unless you give it away.

A clever design by the universe.

It's that's when you know who you are and what you are.

And sometimes you tend to mix that up with attachment,

Dependency,

Desire,

Passion,

And even possession,

Taking and holding.

And you will learn pain comes as a great teacher,

Comes as a teacher to take you back to your truth.

Love doesn't hold,

Doesn't desire,

Doesn't get attached to anything.

And in that loving state,

When you love that state to shape your intentions,

Your thoughts and actions,

You return to your state of security,

Secure with yourself.

And the search for security in what you are not,

That is the world out there,

Comes to an end naturally.

Your anxieties disappear naturally.

Your emotional dependencies end naturally.

Loneliness comes to an end naturally.

And in that state,

Being alone or being with another are both equally okay.

All of this when you start acting from your highest state of being.

When you act from that state of love,

There is an awareness that your sense of inner security is stable.

You notice it arising from the inside out.

Your neediness for the stimulation of another or by many others is gone.

You realize that all those old ways are simply methods of escaping responsibility for the creation of your own goodness,

Your own intentions,

Feelings and then acting upon them.

Now you understand your value.

You begin to understand that you are a source of the most valuable energy in the world.

And no one,

Absolutely no one can ever take that away from you.

Because you've understood that your sense of security arises from the inside out.

And you don't fear being lonely anymore.

How do you begin?

Just start.

Just do something for someone without wanting anything in return.

And notice the sensation of complete liberation.

Now,

Let's do a little practical experiment of this giving away.

I want you to think of someone,

Some people or some place that could use some healing energy.

And imagine that there is a sparkling star in your forehead,

Somewhere just behind your forehead,

Below the brain,

In between the ears.

And in this star,

There's a great energy of wellness.

Now imagine a beam of light coming out of your forehead and shining towards that person,

People or place.

This light heals.

This light gives hope.

This light makes it known that you care.

Let that go.

And now just sit under the loving divine grace of the supreme light.

And bask under the glory of this divine supreme mother.

And now just sit under the loving divine grace of the supreme mother.

And now just sit under the loving divine grace of the supreme mother.

And now just sit under the loving divine grace of the supreme mother.

And ever so gently begin to wiggle your toes,

Wiggle your fingers,

And gently rock your head side to side.

And some nice deep,

Comfortable breaths.

Just whenever you feel comfortable,

I invite you to open your eyes and acknowledge how you feel right now.

Thank you for joining me in this practice.

I invite you to go ahead and share if you feel comfortable how you feel right now in one word.

Reviews

Thank you ✨❤️

One word doesn’t do it. Surprised, subtle, activated, frail, spark of invigouration, shaken (in the sense of vibration), grateful and grace would be my ‘one word’.

🤍🙏

Oh my goodness what an incredibly wonderful meditation and a great way to begin my day. My word is “peaceful”. Thank you for this meditation. 🙏

A higher vibration. Instead of meditations seeking love, this one focuses on the ultimate truth that we ARE love! Such a critical message for us during this (any) time. Thank you for presenting this material in such a loving way!! Namaste. 🙏🩷

Thank you 🙏 Felt peaceful 🩷

Thank you 🙏🏻

Peace.
Namaste 🙏

That was beautifully explained… I was beginning to think something was wrong with me because I am so comfortable when I am alone and not lonely and in my work I overflow universal energy for everyone I encounter and it makes me feel so connected and in harmony!
Thank you ☺️

I agree with most of this guidance and this presentation is quite helpful. I have experienced this and it is true. I do think our society makes it difficult to feel comfortable alone and sometimes presses us to feel lonely because we are alone. Our venues, like restaurants, travel and other activities aren’t set up to be welcoming to a person who is solo and this can make it difficult. Still a fine lesson and so true. 🌺

Loved🙏🙏🙏

I used this to help myself fall asleep. The teachings showed up in my dreams. Will listen again.

Excellent flow through understanding loneliness and how to grow and heal.

Blessed

Peaceful :)

This was an emotionally transforming experience- I actually enjoy being alone but the possibility of growing old alone scares me especially now that my husband has terminal cancer. I gained a little confidence listening to this meditation and I plan on listening many more times so I might move from fear to acceptance- thank you 🙏

Apprehensive 🥰

Love 🙏💖

Deeply healing. I needed this reminder today. Thank you! 🙏🏼💞🌟

Love