Hi,
And welcome to this meditation.
For whatever reason you decided to come here today,
I'm glad you did.
Perhaps it's due to some sort of distress.
We could even go as far as calling it a crisis,
Big or small.
A crisis of the mind or the spirit,
Or both.
Maybe you've come to a point where you just feel out of control.
That despite how many things you ticked off your list,
You felt you got nothing done.
Like trying to walk up an escalator that's moving in the opposite direction.
From my own experiences with stress and panic anxiety,
That is where I usually got stuck.
That despite my mind racing tirelessly I felt like I was slowly sinking in mud.
And the more I struggled to think to regain control,
The more I sank,
Becoming more paralyzed by the sheer burden of some circumstance or situation.
It was exactly like stepping on the gas pedal of your car and not switching to first gear.
You get a revving engine,
But you won't move an inch.
For many years I thrived on being able to work and do things at a very high speed.
I just stepped on that gas pedal and kept switching gear seamlessly.
My energy and my thinking were always in perfect sync.
It felt like there was no limit to how fast I could go.
But after burning myself out too many times,
Very much from that way of living,
It became more and more difficult to switch that gear.
My mind could start racing,
But my thinking just couldn't keep up.
I was pressing down on that gas pedal,
But I couldn't even switch to first gear.
I just got stuck,
And in the frustration I just kept pressing down on that gas pedal,
Convinced that I just needed to power through the panic.
But my engine just kept on revving,
And I wasn't moving an inch.
From the process of meditation,
What started to become clear was that I needed to calm down in order to gear up.
When my head started racing,
I couldn't do what I'd always done,
Which was to simply gear up and take off.
I now had to take my foot off the gas pedal completely.
Through the breath,
I had to stop that engine from revving.
To get anywhere,
I had to slow down.
So let's begin.
I would like you to take a comfortable position,
Be it sitting or lying down,
As long as you feel relaxed,
Or a position that can allow you to relax.
Let's take a few deeper breaths together,
Breathing in through the nose,
And out through the mouth.
Try and feel every little sensation in your body right now.
The tense parts,
The parts you are letting go,
The parts you are resting on.
Feel your mind and body start working as one.
Keep your focus on the breath.
Feel your chest widening.
Now you might experience some resistance in your body and mind.
The last thing it may want to do is calm down.
It may be convinced that it just needs to keep going.
Don't fight these emotions.
Just try and breathe through them.
Take your foot off the gas pedal completely.
Feel that internal engine of yours quieting down.
For this moment,
You don't have to go anywhere.
Everything you need is right here.
It's not in any action or performance.
Just breathe in,
And breathe out.
Whatever situation you felt that you ended up in,
What we're doing now is trying to start over.
Remember,
When we get lost,
The best way is to go back to where we started.
Retrace your steps.
I'm going to let you sit with this practice for just a while now,
Breathing deeper,
Feeling looser.
Keep your focus on the breath,
Feeling that stillness coming to you.
I'm going to let you sit with this practice for just a while now.
I'm going to let you sit with this practice for just a while now.
Feel that energy coming back.
That energy you thought maybe you wouldn't reach by just slowing down.
That feeling of capability and maybe even creativity,
But it's there.
Sometimes you just got to stop running around in search of it.
Now I want you to start coming back to the space that you're in.
Take notice of the sensations in your body,
The position that you're in.
Now together with me,
I want you to take a deep breath.
When you fully exhale through the mouth,
I want you to open your eyes.
Breathe in,
Breathe out.
Welcome back.
Now returning to the real world may be a strange sensation.
So if you want to,
I'd advise you to take a few more deep breaths,
Eyes open before continuing on with your day.
I hope you got your engine to quiet down a bit.
I know mine did.
Thank you.
