Covid-19: Daily Grief

These meditations focus on grief in this time of the Covid-19 virus. Amidst all this change, and the natural emotion of grief, I offer a reminder of what does not change. Interwoven with brief spiritual teachings on grief, and practical coping strategies, are silences for integration and meditation. We join our beloved community in a shared experience to grieve not alone, but together, and find our calm true unchanging nature, our original self, here and now in this present moment. Begins and ends with 3 rings of the singing bowl.

Transcript

Ching Ching Ching Ching Ching Hello,

This is Jacob Watson,

And this is a continuation in the series of teachings and meditations on grief addressing the COVID-19 virus.

Welcome.

The topic here is daily grief,

What we feel every day,

Especially these days as we live in the days of the virus.

Interwoven with these teachings on grief are coping strategies and silences for integration and meditation.

Let's go back to the moment you woke up this morning,

Still in bed,

Still half asleep.

I'll bet you had a second or two when you were emerging from sleep and you were free of thought,

Free of remembering the COVID-19 virus.

Then a thought came,

And these days it's likely to be grief,

Some real and natural response to the COVID virus.

Here,

It's helpful to respect and honor your response of grief.

You feel it because you are alert,

Aware,

And alive as a human being.

You allow yourself to be human,

To have a heart,

To feel what you feel,

To have a healthy response to your environment.

And right now,

Your environment is living with the COVID-19 virus.

To do otherwise could be avoidance or denial or even depression.

No,

You are alive and well and feeling grief today.

This day,

You have here and now.

You are experiencing daily grief.

Then,

As you wake up more fully,

The daily grief hits in whatever form,

Perhaps even an unexpected form,

A new day and a new wavelet of grief.

But then,

Maybe in a few minutes,

You had to concentrate so you can brush your teeth or a bit later,

Cut up some fruit to go on your cereal.

When you do these tasks,

The grief went away briefly,

Or maybe it didn't.

Maybe you were able to do two tasks at once.

But be aware,

Multitasking is way overrated.

When you brush your teeth,

Hold onto the toothbrush.

When you cut strawberries,

Hold onto the knife.

Do one thing at a time.

When the thought of grief lingers,

Intrudes,

Put down your toothbrush,

Put down your knife.

Or maybe you do a brief negotiation.

You contract with the grief and say,

Not right now,

I'm busy.

It's like putting the feeling,

Grief in this case,

On a shelf and promising to take it off the shelf and give it its moment,

Its time,

To your attention later.

But not too much later.

This is daily grief,

So agree to bring it off the shelf sometime this day.

Here we'll have some silence.

Choose to give your grief the space and time it is asking for.

Maybe it won't be as quick as you would like.

Maybe it won't finish with you for a while until it's had its say,

Taken you over for a part of your day.

But this is your decision.

Grief recycles itself,

Bores into your mind,

And images of grief appear unbidden.

But you decide how to respond.

You don't ask for it,

But your mind brings it.

Always remember that you are in charge of your day,

Not your mind.

You respond how you want.

And in addition to the thought of grief,

We often have a bodily sensation of grief as well,

A physical form or feeling.

Daily grief can come as a headache or an ache somewhere else in your body,

Even of course a heartache.

The physical manifestation wants acknowledgment as well.

Perhaps it calls for a physical kind of healing,

A walk outdoors,

Some yoga practice,

And essential oil,

Stretching your body,

A soothing cup of tea,

Etc.

Grief of course is strong.

It will not be denied.

It seeks even demands its own time and space.

What it seeks is acknowledgment and then expression.

They say what you resist will persist,

And that's true of grief.

So it's best to pause,

Acknowledge what is true at this moment.

You are feeling grief at this moment today,

Right now,

As part of your day.

But if you make it your choice to pay attention to the grief,

It is your life again.

You are exercising choice.

This makes a big difference.

Expression is next,

Some form of moving the grief today.

Perhaps it is enough to say,

I'm grieving or I'm sad.

Also,

You can send thoughts and prayers to someone and thus bring them into your consciousness and especially into your heart.

You can express your love to them and talk with them.

They can be present in spirit.

This is healing not only for them,

But for you as well.

And it takes place instantly,

Faster than the speed of light.

It's done.

In this way,

Grief is a powerful stimulant,

An encouragement to feel and share compassion right now,

Here in this day,

As part of what you do today.

And part of that is giving yourself this silence.

Remember,

You can choose to control the incoming sources of daily grief by selecting if and when you expose yourself to exterior input from your,

Let's say,

Your iPhone,

Your computer,

Your TV,

Etc.

Because you don't want to be out of your mind with grief,

You can remember that you can limit your intake.

Again,

Limit your intake.

It's your choice.

This grief comes for a brief time at your invitation while as you notice it,

Express it and thus respond to it in some way.

But it comes and goes relatively briefly.

What takes up a lot more time and a lot more energy are the judgments,

The opinions,

The reactions,

Imagining what people will think,

How will it turn out,

Etc.

,

Etc.

That's all extra.

Takes extra time and energy and gets the mind,

Your mind,

Really going back into the past and ahead into the future,

The two areas where you have no zero control.

Then you've lost your freedom,

The freedom you'd won by simply being in the present,

Acknowledging and experiencing the grief.

Now and here today,

You can regain your freedom.

Once the grief is expressed,

You are free.

You and your attention,

Your consciousness is available to you,

Open to whatever comes in this day.

The question comes up,

Will the grief return?

Maybe it certainly will return someday,

But now you know that it comes back for a reason to be acknowledged and expressed.

That's what it wants.

And now you know because you remember how to do that.

You can choose to do that.

Choice is wonderful.

So,

Amidst your day,

Grief will come.

Grief about living in this pandemic generally,

All the ways your life is different than it was say two months ago and grief about the general public feelings of loss due to illnesses and deaths.

And specifically,

Feeling grief about individuals,

People you know.

Here is some more silence.

In this stillness,

Remember and recall to your heart people that you want to honor.

I encourage you to be very specific when you choose to welcome.

Yes that's the word.

Welcome the grief,

Your grief from living in these days of the COVID-19 virus.

And yes,

It does help to say the word out loud,

Not just read it on a screen or listen to someone say it,

But you say it,

Use the words COVID-19.

Using it out loud reduces its power,

Diminishes its impact.

Imagine your day and choose a particular time to feel your grief.

Be specific when,

Where and how you acknowledge daily grief.

By that I mean quite intentional.

Be intentional.

Choose a place,

A space in your house or apartment,

Perhaps you sit in a bedroom chair or have tea in your living room or outside on your porch.

Again,

It's your decision.

Also,

Choose a time when exactly do you choose to invite daily grief into your day,

Both a beginning and really importantly an end.

You can allow grief to be with you for a short time,

A minute or longer,

Say maybe 10 minutes.

Again,

You choose.

Remember,

Choose a beginning and an ending.

So daily grief is here and then acknowledged and expressed not here.

We choose to acknowledge it and to express it and then to live for a while this day without it.

We choose to give grief its time,

Its space and its expression and then to move through our day.

Daily grief,

Yes,

But our day is so much more full than the scant time,

Space and expression we choose to give to grief.

You have the whole rest of your day,

Your day.

I'll post another reflection on grief and COVID-19 soon.

Thank you.

May you be well and to conclude,

I'll ring the singing bowl three times.

May you be well and to conclude,

I'll ring the singing bowl three times.

May you be well and to conclude,

I'll ring the singing bowl three times.

Reviews

Thank you, very helpful.

Thank you so much for your meditations/talks on grief. They are truly a balm.

I appreciate the periods of silence in your messages. I need to follow your suggestion to limit the media input. Thank you

Thank you so very much for this reflection! It is absolutely perfect and when I needed to validate my feelings and process as well as offer your meditation to others. This is going to help so many people. What a blessing!

Helpful. Thank you.

💖this is such a valuable series, thank you, it's the guidance and reflection I need💖

Fantastic meditation...thank you so much for sharing!

Very clear and helpful, thank you. Will look for the next one.

Thanks for this guidance...Covid-19 virus is real and I am called upon to reach out and help within my family ❤️🙏❤️