A Return To Innocence (Live Replay: No. 5)

Self Realisation is a Return to Innocence a purity beyond words. Using simple and brief meditation exercises experiential openings into the nature of the True Self as Infinite Silence are shared. This is part of the Self Realisation Programme on Insight Timer. Philip gently guides with exquisite clarity and offers insight on peoples experiences and questions. A guided Infinite Silence Meditation is included that has transformed the lives of many people around the globe.

Transcript

So welcome to you all,

Spread around the world.

This is part three of an initial 11 part program on spiritual self-realisation.

I tweaked the title of this one a little bit in between streams.

It's the same subject we're talking about,

What I've called it,

A return to innocence.

A return to innocence and we're going to explore that and what that's pointing to in some depth in this particular stream.

So welcome as I say wherever you are in the world and thank you for people who have made donations on previous streams.

They are always welcome both on behalf of Insight Timer and myself.

Helps us spread the word.

So really what I wanted to start tonight and I'm probably going to go to a meditation a little bit sooner than usual tonight to sort of start to draw this subject of innocence and returning to innocence out more fully for you.

But one point that you'll hear me expressing in many different ways over the next few weeks whilst we explore this live stream program on self-realisation is this,

Is that you are already that which you truly seek.

Now this you I'm referring to is not yourself as the body-mind.

It's you as infinite silence or infinite consciousness and as it is realised and when it is realised that that I'm pointing out there will become self-evident.

It is unmissable,

Unmissable and unequivocal as well.

And it will be seen that you've always been this and it's a like the biggest oh my gosh moment in the universe.

And it's that the purity of that the absoluteness of that the untouched nature of that the unblemished nature of that the unchanging nature of that.

That's the innocence the innocence and I actually started to refer to it that way a few years ago when I'd done an event not too far from here I'm in Lancashire in the UK sorry North Yorkshire in the UK and I was doing an event in Lancashire which is where I'm from originally and somebody had a great insight not long after that event and she told me about it.

And the insight that she got was actually she got that song by you've probably heard of the group Enigma and they have a song called I return to innocence and if you haven't heard it it's well worth listening to that after the stream and I'll hopefully remind you about that again later.

And actually if you listen to the words of that song it really is actually quite profound in relation to spiritual self-realisation and actually I would have played it for you here tonight but I suspect there's all sorts of copyright issues and the insight was not to do that for that reason but anyway you can go and have a look later.

So I want to kind of unpack that further as we go through the stream tonight and help you start to open to that and start to realise what it is I'm pointing to.

Hello there to Sheena and thank you for that comment.

One of the key pointings to be aware of when we identify with the ego mind as that which we already are that's all we are the body mind the ego mind.

Ego is in fact you will see the great what I call the great judge not only is it a judge it's the jury and the executioner as well and we do that to ourselves judging ourselves all the time but actually that same energy is being projected out into the world either we're judging others or others are judging us as well and that all comes from this sense of separation which I've referred to in this fibre optic lamp metaphor.

We see if we are these points of light we're seeing ourselves as separate from everybody else when actually all of the meditative journey as I've said many times now is about looking down the fibre optic first to the beingness the universal beingness state and then to the power that drives that the infinite silence or the infinite consciousness and that's the oneness and in fact it's actually everywhere and that's also the innocence.

So how do we get there?

You get there by realising that in fact you as this infinite silence or infinite awareness are in fact already there and there was nowhere for you to go and it's always been now here and the meditations I use which are based on rooted in what I call the infinite silence meditation which emerged as part of the realisation is this vehicle which is an awareness based meditation that is central and is going to move you deeper and deeper into this space of awareness but I'll often introduce it by a way of opening you and helping you to move beyond mind identification very quickly and I use that in various versions of what I call the who am I meditation and I've done that on each of the streams so far in slightly different ways to help you see different aspects of identification and belief which is blocking the realisation and therefore to start to look beyond that and to open to that which is beyond that.

I want to go there now pretty much very early in this stream rather than talking lots and lots of open that up a little bit with another angle another take on that who am I meditation that I haven't done it quite this way before on a stream but I feel it's going to be useful to you and let's see where we go with this and it's useful as I take you through this maybe just naturally see what emerges but maybe make a mental note of anything that comes up for you in this process it's very brief and it's very simple but it's a way of opening you up to and beyond mind identification.

So let's go there now and just simply close your eyes and as you close your eyes just simply and firstly bring your attention to your body and just simply notice any sensations,

Feelings,

Emotions,

Maybe even the breath and just notice that all these phenomena are coming and going maybe increasing in intensity or decreasing but just moving and shifting all the time and the reason that you can notice all this these changing phenomena is because there's a witnessing presence that I call the silent witness that is simply watching untouched,

Unblemished and unmoved by the changing phenomena so just rest as this silent witness and as you rest here I'm going to take you through various stages now of this who am I meditation and just see what if anything emerges for you.

So we'll start with who am I?

Who am I?

And see if anything emerges there.

Now taking the meditation a bit further asking this question inside who am I without judgment?

Who am I without judgment?

And just rest with that who am I without judgment?

And if anything arises maybe just a mental note of that and if it doesn't that's absolutely fine.

Now moving on asking this question inside who am I without guilt?

Who am I without guilt?

And resting with that seeing if anything emerges and finally now who am I without shame?

Who am I without shame?

Who am I?

Good good good so good so whenever the normal is right for you just gently opening your eyes and I'll see if anybody and it would be good if you happen to do this to just share anything that came to you on any or all of those and then we'll have a look at that and see what that points us towards so I can see by the way so sorry Shanna I got your name wrong yeah Patty said I feel free and light I feel free and light and I'm not surprised Patty that's great because these things that I was asking you to explore and ask who you were without particularly judgment guilt shame these are things that don't belong to you they do not belong to you they may be emotions that appear in the body from conditioning and the belief in the body mind identity but they're not yours they're not yours and if they ever appear they're simply invitations to be witnessed and dissolved by the power of awareness and I'll be talking about that length on one of the future streams which I call transmuting fear into love so LK has said free and brave excellent and that keyword there free because as the self is realized you will realize that you are freedom itself you will realize that you are freedom itself and Shanna's saying feeling more myself perfect and this self what I'm sensing there Shanna isn't the self that we've identified ourselves as we've the body mind but actually the true essence which is experiencing itself in the form of Shanna and it's likely that that feels more resonant more aligned more peaceful more still maybe even more expansive I'm going back to LK about the brave yes because we're so squashed down in the conditioning that we have that there's a kind of courageousness like a lion waiting to roar inside Stefan saying I felt lots of emotions coming up with guilt and shame thank you for sharing that Stefan and that's important to recognize that I'm not to run away from those emotions because that's as I shared many times and I know that you've been on many streams and many events those emotions are simply invitations to dissolve that which no longer serves you so I know that we've spoken at length about that in with him one-to-ones and so forth so you know the process that I'm pointing out is about letting it be felt be seen and witness and those emotions have arisen as an invitation to allow the power of awareness or infinite silence to dissolve them so I'm glad that you've shared that because it's important for other people to see that so that's very brave of you and I'm glad that you've done that and if there's emotions still there let them be there and just watch with this silent witnessing presence and they will pass they may increase in intensity they may change shape and form but just trust the witnessing presence nothing else so thanks for sharing that Stefan Rufus is saying on the first one nothing seldom do I get anything on the who am I question great so nothing this is actually quite important nothing or maybe even no thing we're so used to thingness which is limited and is bound by space and time but no thing or nothing is actually internet so it may be that you're just getting a sense of that without realizing it but on two and three she got free and love perfect so that's going back to somebody else got free and a reminder that we are as the selfish realized that's the true nature of the selfish realized as infinite silence or infinite consciousness we are in fact freedom itself and love which was the answer to her mind without shame actually love it turns out he's like it's kind of like a perfume of the infinite silence in the same way that the flower has a beautiful perfume the infinite silence or the infinite consciousness has perfumes and we use words like love truth peace joy gratitude and actually all of these are for no reason they're just the natural arising of this infinite silence so thanks for sharing that roof Tracy's saying at peace and in fact Tracy as I know that you're starting to see very clearly now from things you've been sharing with me you are in fact the source of peace because that is one of the perfumes of the silence great and then David is saying no thing with the first question and then with each of the other questions strong emotions and then boundless silent freedom fantastic David I'm delighted that you've shared that so it sounds like those emotions passed through very very quickly and dissolved and this this boundless silent freedom and that my friend as you know you've heard me say many times that is the silence itself for it is indeed boundless it is silent it is infinite it is the innocence this recognizes itself as that and the form of David is an appearance on the green screen of consciousness that it chooses to have the experience of being in the form of David but always it and you are that boundless silent freedom and then Shana says yeah the essence exactly perfect Shana I'm glad that resonates with you and LK is giving us a big big yes so thanks for sharing those experiences folks this there was a range of them there but I'm hoping that with people having shared that and the paintings it helps us see that actually we've all been going through this same journey of conditioning into the belief that all we are is this body mind and that actually if we're prepared to open up to awareness we'll see that there's so much more that we truly are and in fact it's already here and all of this stuff and the reason I asked those questions around judgment guilt and shame was to help you see that actually both yourself has been judging yourself and therefore creating sense of guilt and shame but others also who are lost in the story have been doing the same both to themselves and to each other and so we end up with this mirroring each other's ego rather than mirroring each other's truth as the essence as the silence as the awareness as the infinite consciousness so you can see the importance of being open to letting go of those things and that actually although they may be genuine appearances felt emotions in the body they're not actually that which you are they have come from the belief in the case of mistaken identity and the emotional trauma that gets built up in the energy body through that process and so these different versions of the who are my meditation where I've asked them questions in different ways to you using different words are all to unpack to dissolve the layers of the onion to start to see which is that which is before and beyond all of the phenomena and some of the most challenging ones I've addressed tonight judgment guilt shame these are big things in it pretty much everybody's life right from the word go and actually then ultimately in terms of who you really are they are not yours it doesn't mean that they don't appear but when they do their invitations to move in to realize that deeper presence that silent witnessing presence that is untouched unmoved unblemished and infinite and eternal and that and the power of that alone is what's going to bring about this realization only that will bring about that relationship for you are already this and there's nothing for you you have to do to be that you are in fact already that so it's about realizing that's why we use the term self realization but realization would oh my gosh I am that and this I is not a personal eye it's an infinite I you we collectively are that this is what you're here for and this is what you're here to realize and as I've said many times on the previous streams you don't need to believe a single word I say because it one day this will be realized so let's just have a look at what Ruth Essing loving your metaphors writing them down squished down with our conditioning such a great visual really helpful I'm glad that that works for you Ruth there's an endless supply of these these insights and I'm glad that they work for you my approached is tends to be very direct because that's how it unfolded here but also as I sometimes say without the benefit or hindrance of traditional teachings it's not that they're bad or good or actually they're wonderful but actually it was so direct but if that's why I draw on these very practical pointers and metaphors that are useful particularly for people from the West it's not that the people from these can't get it either they can it just that we the way that it emerged draws upon that very very direct essence so I'm really grateful for everybody who shared their things there and I'm hoping that with the various angles and things that people have said some have had emotions and then deep silence and some have had greater clarities and deeper scenes that you can start to see that actually in none of this stuff these energetic Barry baggage that you've been carrying is actually true about who you really are none of it and if I was to say to you that every thought you've ever had about who you think and believe you are was not actually true it seems like a big statement to make that but actually no thought about yourself no belief about yourself is actually true because that which you are seeking is before thought be all before belief beyond mind beyond space beyond time and that's why it's so important these very brief little meditations that I do with various aspects of the Who am I I just they're all awareness based meditations and an awareness based meditation is the most powerful form of meditation and the reason for that is because you are infinite awareness it's not based on phenomena there's nothing that you need to visualize just simply let the inside arise naturally out of awareness that's all that's all so whilst I remember before I go to the next phase and a longer meditation with the infinite silence I'm also gonna do a reading tonight I wrote a piece following that workshop that I did a few years ago the lady had this return to innocence song appearing a consciousness and I want to share that with you and towards the end of the meditation tonight it'll take a few minutes to do but he's got some important pointings in it that I feel is best for me to just simply do that as a meditative reading I've been asked on previous streams about a group and I thought I'd set one up well I did set one up but it turns out if you do it as a private group unless I can actually know who you are and invite you you won't be able to join you so what I've done is a reset up the group as a public group on insight timer the name is slightly different than the first one in that it has an exclamation mark after it's called nothing special nothing special with an exclamation mark and because it's now public you should be able to find it by searching nothing special exclamation mark and I don't know if it appears on my profile on insight timer but if you do want to join that the group is in support of the program and it's a place for you to launch your questions and connect so that's the name of the group so what I like to do now is build upon what we've explored so far the seeing that we've had so far and take you in to the meditative space again there's one more question that I'll ask in that guide you into the infinite silence and then at some point just with your eyes closed still I'll do this meditative reading because you have some important insights in there and it's a way of conveying insight to you in a meditative space that helps it seep deeper in to your consciousness so if you're good for that get yourselves comfortable again and closing your eyes and just like before becoming aware of the phenomena in your body the feelings any emotions the breath any physical sensations and just without judgment simply silently accepting they are here resting your attention in this silent witness you you simply silently watches the phenomena appearing good and now asking this question this awareness inside what if I had nothing to prove what if I had nothing to prove just resting with that seeing what if anything emerges what if I had nothing to prove and resting as this silent witness nothing to do here just be open from your heart to the energy and the experience of the spheres nothing to visualize just be open to the energy of the spheres resting as this silent witnessing presence and even this now is like a sliver of ice in an ocean of water and it's melting dissolving effortlessly silently becoming one with the water and the water is an ocean of infinite silence be still and know this rarified atmosphere of silence transform transmutes,

Dissolves all that you are not.

Effortlessly,

Silently.

Be still.

And know.

This.

Silence.

Infinite.

Silence.

In silence.

You will realize.

Your truth.

In truth.

You will realize.

You are.

Silence.

Infinite.

Silence.

Eternal presence.

Essence.

Eternity.

Be still.

And know.

Always this.

And now continuing to rest in this as this.

Keeping your eyes closed.

I'll now read from the piece that I wrote several years ago,

Which offers a number of insights.

It's called The Return to Innocence.

The return to innocence is the return to your truth.

Everybody is innocent here in this absolute truth.

And we are all one.

Perfect.

Whole.

Formless.

Timeless.

And eternal self.

Yet that same self can be expressed and experienced in a body.

Self-realization.

It is here now.

It is who you really are.

You are this now.

It is only your identification,

Attachment,

And belief in less than this infinite self that creates the experience of suffering.

The experience of overlaying that on others.

The experience of guilt.

Remembering your absolute truth is the return to innocence.

To beauty beyond words.

To where are you returning?

Nowhere.

Not a place.

But now.

Here.

The same letters,

But a totally different sense.

There is nowhere for you to go.

Nowhere you have to go.

Nothing you have to do.

You are already it.

It is only your false perception through the lens of that identification,

Attachment,

And belief in thoughts.

Ego,

In other words.

That makes you experience that you are not there.

You are already that which you truly seek.

This is not a body.

Not a single thing.

Nothing,

In fact.

Yet infinite.

Infinite silence.

This then is the return to that which you already are.

Always have been.

Always will be.

The return to innocence.

Or return to inner sense.

Your inner sense.

That profound knowing and experiencing of truth that is ever present in all.

This being the highest form of trust.

Which is not having to trust at all.

But instead being the living experience of truth.

This is the greatest opportunity.

The greatest gift.

From the self.

To the self.

And you are it.

Listen not then to the noisy voice in your head.

But instead to the gentle,

Graceful and truthful calling of your heart.

It never lies.

In following this totally,

Unwaveringly,

The return to your true home is guaranteed.

It is guaranteed anyway.

But you can make the experience and the flowering of truth easier by following this calling.

Now.

The moment of choice has arisen.

Which do you choose?

The head and the lie?

Or the heart and truth?

Put like that,

It makes you wonder why you would choose any different.

But we do.

And have done.

It's all rooted in fear.

A false perception.

Ego will try to prevent you from realising this.

In the false belief,

It is protecting you.

Protecting you from what?

Its demise.

How to proceed then when fear emerges?

Know then,

In that moment,

It is an invitation.

An invitation for it to be released.

To rest one's attention in the unchanging and infinite silence.

It is so simple.

Nothing complicated about it.

How could it be?

It is you already.

Return to the inner sense now.

That is the return to innocence.

The return to your true self.

And just continuing to rest in this.

As this.

Silent witnessing presence and essence.

In a moment,

I'll ring the ting sha bells.

The bell rings.

The bell rings.

And as the sound of the bells gently fades away.

Continuing to rest in and as this infinite silence.

Knowing it is here always.

And you,

None personally,

Are it.

Always helping.

Always will be.

This infinite silence.

And now,

Aware of your body.

The chair you're sitting in.

Or whatever you may be,

Lay on.

And whenever the moment is right for you.

Just gently,

Silently.

Opening your eyes.

Good.

Good.

So thank you for staying with that.

And just noticed a question that I couldn't answer in the midst of the meditation from Susie.

So I'll answer it now.

Hopefully you're still here,

Susie.

So Susie is saying,

Are these your words or from a oracle girl?

Dr.

Hobbs.

Well,

I don't know who Oracle Girl or Dr.

Hobbs are,

But they're mine.

Well,

Mine in the sense that it is the voice of Philip that's expressing it,

But they're emerging naturally and effortlessly.

From the infinite space of awareness or infinite silence and the essence of the.

Meditation of the shared earlier actually emerged as part of the realisation of the self.

And so what I share there just naturally flows from that space.

It was made clear that it was to be shared in this specific way.

And I give a little bit more guidance here on these meditations than I necessarily need to because we've got a worldwide audience.

Some people are very experienced and others maybe not so much.

So I tend to offer a little bit more guidance on these.

Susie saying so wonderful.

Thank you.

I think she admires you.

Well,

I'm not sure who she is,

But thank you very much for sharing that Susie.

But he's saying thank you very,

Very much.

I must say,

Thank you,

Patty.

Which do I use?

Stefan saying to use a matrix metaphor.

I choose to use the red pill.

You've been watching the matrix too much.

Stefan,

Thanks for sharing that.

Such a peaceful space,

Says Casper.

Hearts from Esfra and Jews,

Says Stefan.

Made me cry so beautiful.

I'm glad to hear that.

I suspect those were tears of joy arising in you,

Tracy,

The way you've expressed that.

So thank you for sharing that.

David says beautiful.

Namaste.

And Esther says thank you so much.

Thank you very much,

By the way,

Ruth.

I can see that you've made a donation there.

It is much appreciated on behalf of myself and Insight Timer.

There's lots of resources,

As you can imagine,

That go into producing the various things that go on to Insight Timer and the streams and everything that I do.

So that's very much appreciated.

It all goes to help spread the word and reach more people around the world.

Fanas is saying very soothing session.

Thank you.

Thank you for sharing that,

Fanas,

And thank you to Ruth.

I chose to miss,

I chose Miss Singer to watch this live.

Oh,

Right.

OK.

Well,

I'm glad that you chose this one anyway.

And perhaps your heart was calling you to this.

I often ask and maybe it's worth asking now if anybody wants to share that.

I usually do that,

Particularly at live events when I'm in person with people.

I'll often ask as the opening thing that I say is,

Why are you here today?

Why are you here?

Maybe some people will share that.

Feel free to do so.

I'll have a look at that in the comments.

But interestingly,

People might give many answers to that question,

And I've asked that many times over the years.

But really,

The common thread in them is that it's actually an inner calling from your heart.

It may manifest in many ways.

But really,

It's the calling from your heart that is actually arising from this innocence,

This infinite silence,

This inner space of awareness.

That's why people come to these events.

That's why they meditate.

That's why they want to connect,

Because that same essence,

That same energy is in us all.

It may not be your experience right now,

And that's OK.

There's nothing wrong with that or right about it.

It is what it is.

But I can say unequivocally,

With absolute clarity and certainty,

That you,

Even if it may not have been realized yet,

You are this.

And you're here to realize this.

And this is why you are here.

And that is your mission,

Your meaning,

Your purpose,

All wrapped into one.

And it may be expressed in many ways.

Let's just have a look at a few more of these comments.

Connecting with your energy,

Says Esther.

And this energy that you're connecting with,

Esther,

I'd like you to know is also within you.

It's within us all.

It's not just a nice thing to say.

It's actually true.

And it's really all about opening to that.

And all of the pointings I've shared over many years now is about you recognizing and realizing that.

Verena's asking,

Is choosing the heart a continuing choice rather than a one off?

Both and.

It is.

You will experience it in the human form as a continuing choice from moment to moment to moment.

Because in the human form,

Thoughts will still arise.

Things in the emotional body may still come up to be witnessed and dissolved,

And the identity will try to pull you back into suffering.

And so making this the constant choice,

The moment by moment choice.

The fact is,

Though,

And the reason I say both hands is that you are always this heart space of silence.

But at the human level,

Consistency in that choice is very,

Very important.

And it's one of the one of the ways in which I suggest that or point to people to connect with this regularly is to just use that who am I meditation?

The who am I and the who am I without memory that I shared on the very first stream on Inside Timer.

This one will bring you back very quickly.

And you can use that,

As I like to say,

Any time,

Any place,

Anywhere.

Just close your eyes just for a moment.

Who am I?

And who am I without memory?

Do this 10,

20,

30 times a day.

Eventually,

Just on the word who,

You will connect with awareness and you'll be back as presence and stillness.

And then you won't even need to ask the question at all.

So in any choice in life,

Marina,

Always go with this.

What is in the highest and greatest good here?

What is my heart calling me to hear?

Look for that.

And if it's not immediately clear,

Wait.

And best stay with it until clarity emerges and if emotions come face it,

Feel it,

Witness.

So hopefully that answers.

I'm just trying to pick up some of the comments before they rush off the screen.

So Farnaz is saying,

I'm here to help with feeling of missing connection,

Meaningful connections.

So this missing connection,

Farnaz,

Is because of identity and as the true connection is actually always there.

And as you move away from body mind identification,

The inner connection you will see has never gone anywhere.

And so we'd like,

I like to say like hearted souls,

We come into this sacred space of meditation and we connect truly with who we are.

We are all led to this sacred space.

Yes,

We are.

We are indeed.

Ruth is saying on the path,

I guess you could say and what Farnaz said,

Connection.

Yeah,

Absolutely.

Connection and that which you are connecting with is actually that which you truly,

We collectively already are connected with mind souls.

That's a nice way of putting it.

Gregory saying,

I'm here to inspire myself to follow the path to self realisation.

Good,

Because inspiration is one of those perfumes of the silent awareness.

Inspiration is the heart space of silence expressed.

Inspiration feels expansive,

Uplifting,

Inviting.

Mind feels contracting,

Compressing,

Heavy,

Dense,

Should,

Must,

Ought to.

That's the difference between following the heart and following the head.

One is uplifting,

Expansive,

Inviting.

The other is contracting,

Compressing,

Should,

Must,

Ought to.

So back to Varina.

This is how you distinguish and there's a short video I've got Varina and for everybody else.

It's the first one I put on Insight Timer three years ago,

And then I didn't put much on again until recently.

But it's called Trusting and Daring Not To.

Trusting and Daring Not To,

And it's based on a one to one I did with somebody a few years ago and offers a profound insight into the nature of trust and a different perspective.

And I recommend that you look that out on my page on Insight Timer and have a watch of that.

And even if you've already watched it,

Watch it again and again.

It's a very,

Very important painting.

Ruth F is saying,

When you asked,

Who am I with nothing to prove?

I felt uncomfortable and I got death.

And was that ego answering?

The uncomfortableness,

Ruth,

Was an expression of the emotional body.

Which comes from ego,

Comes from the belief in the case of mistaken identity,

The death thing.

There could be a number of facets to that.

Now,

Interestingly,

Self-realisation is often referred to as dying before you die.

Now,

It's not as the mind would have it as the death of the body vehicle.

It's the death of the identification with the body mind,

With the ego,

In other words.

The ego serves a purpose without the ego.

You wouldn't have a physical form,

Actually.

But one insight that emerged as the realisation flowered here was this,

Life is death.

Life is death.

Now,

That sounds strange,

But what it means is it's not the death of the body.

It means as the death of the identity falls away with the body mind identification,

All that remains is life and you are life,

Life eternal.

So I suspect what is coming up there for you,

Ruth,

Is the start of that seeing that life is death.

And the greatest fear of ego,

By the way,

Is death.

Because it equates its demise as the death of the body.

When actually it's not the body that's dying,

It's the identity that's dying.

And actually,

Even as our physical bodies die,

We will see that we are in fact life eternal.

There may be other pathways for us to go through if the self has not been realised and there's still desires in there.

But the,

Should we say,

The end of the road is the beginning of the road,

The realisation that you are this.

So death actually is a gateway and dissolution of the fear of death is actually an entry point to the realisation of the self.

So death isn't what it's cracked up to be from the mind's perspective,

It's actually a gateway to the realisation of the self.

Hopefully that's helped you there,

Ruth.

Sharna's saying,

I'm glad I came across this live one,

I'm glad that you did too,

Sharna.

And I'm glad that you shared that.

Tracy's saying,

I got acceptance.

Now the greatest acceptance,

My friends,

Is the acceptance that you,

True you,

Are already this.

This infinite silence,

This infinite awareness.

Which is why I've been working on unpacking your beliefs and things like shame,

Guilt,

Judgement,

All those things around knowledge and so forth in previous streams.

So that you can start to see this arising naturally.

Thank you for that comprehensive answer,

Says Farina.

Guest says,

After self realisation,

What to do?

Great question.

After self realisation,

What to do?

There's a number of ways we can look at that question,

Guest.

You know,

Actually as the self is realised and particularly also the emotional body is dissolved,

Which can carry on for some time,

By the way,

I need to make that clear.

The natural calling of your heart will start to become more evident to you.

Actually it will start to become more evident in the process,

But it will become much clearer as the self is realised.

And how that then seeks to express itself through your form will be unique to you.

You could have knocked me down with a feather if you'd have said to me 20 odd years ago when I first started meditation,

23 years ago when I first started meditating,

That I'd be doing this for the last 7-8 years now.

Never in a million years would I have believed that possible.

But it could be great music,

It could be a great piece of writing,

It could be a great piece of art.

It could be just bringing up a family in a realised way.

It could be many,

Many things and none of these are better than the other.

There's a unique expression that the universe is seeking to express through your form.

And of course there's that old,

I think it's probably Zen saying,

Before enlightenment,

Chop wood,

Carry water.

After enlightenment,

Chop wood,

Carry water.

Now in the first case there's suffering and that's what most everybody in the planet is experiencing.

It's only a matter of degree.

In the second case the realisation has flowered,

The emotional body is now dissolving and dissolving and dissolving and going away.

And life can be lived not normally but naturally.

Big difference folks.

I'll upload a video,

Sorry not a video,

An audio onto Insight Timer which is called Natural or Normal.

I must remember to do that.

And explain in greater depth.

We're moving from normal,

Which is what the world wants you to be,

To natural.

The natural expression of that which you are.

So hopefully that gives you a pointing guess to that question.

Tracy says,

You will have transcended the personality.

Yes you will.

There's still a uniqueness,

I often refer to it as like a diamond.

It has many facets and we see the beauty of the diamond by the light glinting off the facets.

But the facets of the diamond are intrinsically one with the whole diamond.

And actually with a whole diamond.

And each facet has its own unique expression and therein is the beauty.

Because this chooses to express itself in infinite variety.

So what's the arena saying?

Waiting for when you can lead the live sessions.

I'm not sure what that means but anyway.

Thank you very much by the way to Fonaz for the donation,

That's much appreciated.

Nobody else has donated,

I hope I've picked them all up.

Nancy's saying,

Is this true for all sentient beings?

We are all this.

All of us are this.

The unique expression and benefit in the human form is we can realise this.

But everything,

Every phenomena,

Every plant,

Animal,

Insect,

Planet,

Star,

Grain of dust.

Arises from this infinite silence or infinite consciousness which is an infinite field of energy.

And it's actually in multi-layered and multi-dimensional spheres of increasing density and contraction.

They're kind of like Russian dolls.

And the realisation of the self goes beyond all of those phenomenal spheres.

Into the absolute.

But the finite and the absolute as I've said on one of the early streams are actually not separate,

They're one.

So everything and everyone is this.

The benefit we humans have is to be able to realise that in our own experience.

It comes to know itself in its own experience.

That's deep,

Ruth says.

I am glad I asked.

Thank you.

I'm glad that you found it beneficial,

Ruth.

As I've said many times before,

The questions help other people because there are no stupid ones.

And you'll find that as somebody asks a question and an insight emerges.

That actually you'll find that one person's question is everybody else's question.

Until there are no more questions.

So I always invite questions.

For that reason.

Lea saying thank you.

I am experiencing my biggest ego death today and it's nice to know that there's another beautiful side.

In this you can trust Lee.

The beauty of this is truly beyond words.

It is truly the peace that passes all understanding is,

In fact,

An inner standing and inner.

Knowing.

Realisation.

So this may be a challenging phase as far as the body mind is concerned.

But this witnessing presence that I've talked about in the meditation.

And there are various versions of it.

There are seven versions of it on my profile and insight timer.

That gets you to start recognising this witnessing presence.

There are quarter of an hour to an hour and a half long in steps.

Then if you use one of those meditations,

Lee,

If you haven't already done the meditation today,

It will help you.

Just witness this dying off of the identification with the ego.

And yes,

It might be quite intense,

But as one trusts totally in the witnessing presence,

That passageway.

Will be eased and will move through that.

A lot more quickly.

So trust that process and maybe you might want to join.

For those of you who didn't hear,

I've now made the group public and it's called Nothing Special!

And I would put the link here,

But I don't have it right now,

So I might do that in a moment.

Just want to look at the rest of the comments first.

You have been the highlight of the day.

Thank you very much,

Nelsie.

It's a highlight of my day to share these as well.

Nancy's asking,

Lee's saying,

No that's Ruth,

Sorry.

Nancy's asking,

Did you study the Upanishads or other sources non-duality?

Sure answer Nancy.

No,

I did not.

It was direct.

Unexpected,

Direct.

But I think the key thing looking back was that I absolutely,

When I took up meditation in the year 2000,

I absolutely committed to it,

Even though I was working 60 or 70 hours a week in those days.

And as I realised deeper and deeper that of the benefits it was bringing,

I continued and continued and continued.

I realised that I was following the calling of my heart and it just went on an inexorable path.

So I have not studied any of the Eastern traditions.

I know of them,

But not studied them.

And I couldn't quote from them.

All I'm sharing here is from direct experience and realisation.

Direct experience and realisation.

So it may be quite unusual,

But that's how it was.

That's how it was.

Nancy says,

Hope you got my donation through.

It did not show up.

Actually,

That's an interesting point that Nancy.

I'll check after the stream.

But somebody donated last time and I was looking to sort of give a thank you note to everybody,

Which is the first thing I do after the streams.

And this person who I knew had donated wasn't there.

And I asked Insight Timer about it.

And apparently there is an error.

And I don't know whether it relates to the amount or whatever.

So.

I'll look out for you Nancy and see if it did show up.

If not,

The next stream.

Where are we now?

Are we on Saturday?

Is it Saturday today?

Yeah,

It is.

The next stream is on Wednesday.

Or you could always let me know in that group if you want to join.

So I'll look out for it now and see.

I don't actually know at the moment.

Have you wisdom on resistance,

Frustration,

Disillusionment and despair?

OK,

So resistance,

Frustration,

Disillusionment and despair.

All of these are functions of the ego mind.

And resistance to truth comes from the ego mind identification.

It seeks to resist.

I've just noticed,

By the way,

Nancy,

It's only saying two donations up there.

So I suspect that it may not have come through.

I think because I think there was another one earlier.

Anyway,

Sorry.

So resistance is a function of ego mind and it's basically the ego mind identity hanging on by its fingernails to that identity.

It's trying to protect itself from its demise.

So as you open up to awareness,

One of the things that happens is resistance will appear.

But resistance isn't a bad thing.

Once it's recognised,

The key is to not trust the experience of resistance,

But simply witness it from the space of the silence and know that resistance is not who you are.

And the awareness itself will simply dissolve it.

It's resisting being front and centre stage.

Disillusionment,

Frustration means you're not listening deeply enough to the voice of the heart.

That's not a judgment.

It's just how that works.

So frustration is an invitation to connect within and listen to what your heart is calling you to.

And disillusionment is also even ego mind function because ego mind is always wanting life to be its own way,

To be a certain way,

Whereas life itself or the infinite silence has no judgment about how life should appear.

So when life's not showing up in the way that ego mind wants it to be,

Then disillusionment appears.

Ditto despair because,

As we talked about on the last stream,

It's actually challenging to maintain this personality and to try to fight for life to be a certain way.

And we struggle and fight on and fight on and eventually get to this point of despair where we can no longer cope with this.

And usually at this point,

There can be a collapse in the identity.

The key is to is to if we follow the heart and this go back to Verena's question earlier,

More consistently,

We then don't have to push ourselves to the point of despair,

Because if we use a meditative practice,

An awareness based meditation like the infinite silence meditation regularly,

Then this makes the path easier.

So all of these things are appearing and presenting themselves to you,

Verena,

As invitations to move beyond them,

To witness them,

Face them,

Feel them fully,

Not resist them and let the power of awareness dissolve them.

Nancy is saying,

Is your meditation self-taught?

Short answer is it emerged as part of the realisation.

It was made clear that the meditation was to be expressed in a particular way.

And just effortless insights have arisen that have given people different angles of approach to it.

It didn't come from here.

It's not from the mind.

It's from the awareness.

I mean,

It's a very powerful meditation because it came from this space.

And as I say,

It was made clear that it was to be used in this way.

So that's how it arose.

The ultimate teaching.

Thank you.

Says Tracy.

Did you start your meditation journey with silent meditation?

Short answer,

No.

Karen,

No.

I started 20 years ago with a book by a guy called Paul Wilson in Australia called Calm for Life,

Which basically taught me the basics of meditation.

And I used the guidance in there and then gradually just went with meditation.

I didn't learn lots of techniques,

To be honest.

I just kind of went with how it unfolded for me,

Listened to my heart and gradually,

Gradually,

Naturally,

Naturally,

And did various other things along the way,

Like some alternative therapies.

But I sensed this golden thread.

And that became clear to me in 2011 what that was.

And it just exploded from there.

So I didn't learn lots of techniques.

Now,

I stuck with what my heart was calling to and just went with that.

And that became the awareness based meditation that I share with you today.

There is a donation opportunity on your website.

Yes,

Casper says.

Yes,

There is,

Casper.

There is a donation.

We're not supposed to promote that.

I mean,

So terrible,

But there is.

Don't,

Fana says,

Don't close the donation box whilst it refreshing.

It will close on its own.

So hopefully that answers whoever's question it was earlier.

Sorry.

Whoever that was,

That might answer your question.

I can see two donations there.

It may be that they didn't go through whoever was asking that question.

Casper saying,

Can I express my appreciation in a rare light in this troubled world?

Or should I say my troubled ego?

Well,

Indeed.

Yeah,

We all have been Casper.

But the great news is there is a greater depth,

A greater realisation,

A greater opportunity that's calling you.

And that's why you're here.

To realise this.

Not because I say so,

But because it's true and your heart already knows this.

It does.

That's true for everybody,

By the way.

Your heart already knows this.

Just listen in the silence.

Nancy says,

Perhaps you should write a book.

And indeed,

Nancy,

In fact,

I have the titles of two books that I've had from the Silence over probably a number of years now.

And they are in process.

And so there will be a book at some point,

Probably two.

I have two titles.

One is a question and answer type book and the other is more an expression of my journey.

So those are in process,

Should we say.

So,

Yeah,

I think I've picked up on all that comes from a missed anybody.

Apologies.

Thank you so much for being here and asking and sharing the questions.

Just to remind you once again,

If you want to join the group,

I've made it public.

It's called Nothing Special.

And I'll see if I can find it now.

Just bear with me a moment.

If the browser will let me do this.

And I'll see if I can find the link.

And if I.

Do that.

Right.

I'm going to try and pasting the link in.

Here.

I don't know if you can go from this link,

But that's it there.

Finance is saying that's great about the books.

I love self discovery books.

Yeah.

Might be a year or two away yet finance.

But we'll see.

But they're definitely in process and have definitely been definitely made clear that they need to be written.

So I'm sure they will at some point.

So that's the link that I think you can probably also search on that name.

Nothing special.

Exclamation mark.

It's supporting these live streams.

This one was number three of eleven in twenty twenty two.

There were two in twenty twenty one,

Which are also part of the programme.

And there's number four is on Wednesday,

8 p.

M.

UK time.

Number four is Wednesday,

8 p.

M.

UK time.

This is a very important one.

Probably the most important question to most regularly asked question I have had over the years now is how do I move beyond this emotion?

This struck this suffering,

This struggling,

This whatever it is that's here now.

It's expressed in many ways,

But it's basically dissolving the struggle,

The strife.

How do I move beyond that?

How do I move beyond that?

So the next live stream,

Because of the number of word limiting decisions,

I wanted to get the word nothing special in there.

It's called Fear into Love.

But it's all about transmuting fear into love.

The next session,

Wednesday,

8 p.

M.

UK time,

And I know that there's not an automatic replay available on Insight Timer,

But with the help of a friend who's on this stream commenting,

We're creating audio replay versions.

So if you've missed some,

There'll be an audio available at some point.

And I'm posting all of the replays on the group as well as on my profile.

So transmuting fear into love Wednesday.

Relates to the most consistently asked question over many years now,

And it's all about that process.

It's profoundly simple,

And I'll do a guided experience of that for you,

As well as giving you insight as to the process in greater depth.

So this is a not to be missed stream.

Because that the awareness of that again,

Somebody once asked me,

How did I learn this process?

And I said,

It emerged naturally.

It's a natural part of the realisation.

So I'll be explaining that in great depth with some some insights and then a guided experience of that so that you can understand and use that.

For yourself and the reason it's called transmuting fear into love,

All of the emotions are simply different expressions of fear.

That's all.

And the process is profoundly simple and it uses the power of your awareness alone.

All the tools you ever needed are within you.

So this infinite silence meditation.

Also,

Is used in this process to transmute fear into love,

And I'll be explaining in great depth how you go about that.

It's ultimately very simple,

But I'll come at it from a number of different angles so that you can understand that and experience it.

Most important to experience.

OK,

And the thing special would also be a good title.

I agree,

Nancy.

It would.

And maybe it'll be one of those as well.

Yeah,

It would.

The other titles are really quite good as well.

So.

But.

But yeah,

They'll be on their way.

In fact,

There are on their way.

What a great topic.

Need to do that much fear into love.

So that's next Wednesday.

8 p.

M.

UK time.

8 p.

M.

UK time,

I think,

Is 2 U.

S.

Well,

Depends where you are in the U.

S.

If you're East Coast USA,

Then I think you're five hours behind.

We are where we are in the UK,

But there's a Web site you can check this.

It's called time and date dot com time and date dot com.

And basically you can put your location in and the location you're looking for and it will tell you what the time differences.

But I think East Coast USA is about five to five hours behind UK West Coast,

I think.

Yes.

So Ruth must be East Coast USA because she's saying three Eastern Standard Time and two.

I'm not sure what CST is,

But anyway,

A West Coast USA,

I think,

Is at least eight or nine hours behind UK.

But anyway,

Check the Web site time and date dot com.

Central Standard Time.

There you go.

So that's 8 p.

M.

Wednesday.

Next Wednesday,

Coming Wednesday,

UK time check time and date dot com.

Well,

The only other thing which reminds me to say is just to remind you of some follow up resources I've posted in the group,

But also on my profile,

The first of the live streams,

It was called What It Means to Go Within.

And I explain this metaphor,

The fibre optic metaphor in greater depth on that one.

That's now available in audio.

There's a really powerful but brief five minute audio on the profile.

It's called Fish Discover Water Last.

It gives you another take on self-realisation and then use those seven versions of the infinite silence meditation from quarter an hour max guidance through to an hour and a half.

Lots of silence between the guidance.

Choose the one that's right for you.

This meditation,

As we were clarified tonight from the questions being asked,

Emerged from the silence itself and it's why it's so powerful.

Looking forward to the audio recording.

The next one is four a.

M.

Time.

I'm happy to have suddenly woken up this morning.

OK,

Lee,

You'll be able to find the recordings once we can get them on audio on Insight Timer,

Which is probably at least a couple of weeks lag after.

Being on here because of the approvals process that we go through.

And but I will post them both on my profile and put them in the group as well.

Yeah.

So it will be recorded or definitely have the audio.

I'm hoping that Insight Timer will release the replays of these lives.

I was a bit surprised,

To be honest,

To find that that wasn't an automatic thing.

And lots of other people have said the same thing,

Not just for mine,

But for others.

So perhaps at some point in the future they'll release these replays as videos,

But at the very least we will put the audio onto Insight Timer of the replays.

And Fanas is saying,

I feel like I've found a chest of treasures.

That's beautiful.

Fanas,

Thank you for sharing that and thank you all.

We've already been going 20 minutes more than I'd said,

But that's fine.

I do love sharing these.

Thank you for the donations.

I really appreciate that.

It helps spread the word.

I can see we've got a lot of people here.

Route 22 it says.

So,

Yes,

Please make consider making a course for this,

Philip.

Yeah,

I'm sure I'll do that at some point.

I know that they do courses on Insight Timer.

As I say,

I went on it three years ago,

But then kind of left it whilst I was doing other things.

And then had an insight to come back recently.

So I'll ask them about whether they're happy for me to run a course.

I think lots of people want to do that,

But I'd be happy to do a course on Insight Timer.

And so I think lots of people are clamoring to offer courses.

So if they'll let me,

I will do it.

And I'm not sure what the criteria are,

So we'll see.

But yeah,

I'd love to do that.

I'd love to do that.

OK,

So Susie saying you're amazing.

Thank you.

Well,

We're all amazing.

But thank you for saying that,

Susie.

And thank you for joining.

Thank you for joining,

Joyce.

Thank you.

You could make it for your first time.

Thank you,

Nancy,

For that.

And thank you,

Joyce.

I can see a donation from Ari as well.

So thank you very much for anybody who's donated.

This has been Philip Wade here from North Yorkshire,

England,

In this beautiful space here that I call the Universal Studio.

That is our home,

Actually.

My wife and I have this beautiful space.

I'm broadcasting from there.

So this has been our return to innocence.

You

Reviews

Every audio is like a jigsaw puzzle 😆 they have always something new to realize✨.
Thank you again and again.
🙏✨🤗✨🙏

Absolutely impactful the sixth time Philip. I’m playing 2-8 again after my first five times a while ago. I hear new insights or applications of them each time 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼💛🌷

Amazing, each time I listen there a new insights revealed.
Thank you!
Linda

Thank you!

💗🙏🏼