Overcome Burnout And Find Your Authentic Self: Talk 1 Of 5

This is a wonderful opportunity to listen in your own time to a series of talks that Ian Tucker has given on the Insight timer live platform. Each talk will focus on a specific action that you can adopt to overcome burnout and feel less overwhelmed. In this talk, Ian invites you to consider the importance of building balance into your life,

Transcript

Burnout,

A state of physical and emotional exhaustion.

A state of physical and emotional exhaustion.

It can occur,

In fact indeed it does occur,

When you experience short or long-term stress in your job or in life.

Now it's really interesting that most dictionaries link the term burnout to the work field,

To the work environment or jobs,

But my experience of working with people over the years who are feeling burnt out is it can be in all walks of life.

There's a very common theme to what creates this word burnout.

Another way to look at burnout is overwhelmed,

Just feeling trapped in life,

Feeling lost,

Feeling overwhelmed,

Feeling like you can't take that next step,

Or if you are taking that next step it's in the wrong direction.

I think you get the picture.

So burnout or overwhelm,

A state of physical or emotional exhaustion.

It can occur with short or long-term stress in life or at work.

Let's just leave it to in life.

So what I'd like you to do folks,

Just to help me and help everybody here,

A few words from you,

You have no idea how it might just land with somebody else who needs to hear it.

Just give me some examples now,

One word,

A sentence,

A phrase in the chat of areas of your life where maybe you're experiencing or you have experienced burnout or you're feeling overwhelmed,

Trapped,

Things are difficult,

Like treading through treacle.

Just give me some ideas of what that's like.

Clutter at home.

Okay Cags,

Can you see how sort of different these can be?

We go from working 70 hours a week in an exhaustive job to clutter at home.

There's no right or wrong thing.

Taking on too many emotions from other people.

For most of my life Jack,

I'll sign up to that and at times now.

Being a parent,

Yeah,

Three kids myself,

Louisa,

I get it.

Where do we turn at times?

It's exhausting.

Okay Michelle,

Hold that thought.

Michelle said it feels like a plant,

Slowly dying because no one is watering me and I live in the heat of a Texas summer.

The clue there is self-watering Michelle.

We'll come on to that in a moment.

Self-watering.

Roxanne,

I could be writing these myself,

Helping elderly parents.

I have a situation with my dear and lovely father at the moment.

Day at a time quite stuff.

I get it.

It's difficult.

I could wait.

Teaching,

Okay Adora.

Difficulty in saying no.

I think a lot of people,

Yeah,

I think that's massive actually Maisie.

I think a lot of people would probably buy into that.

Managing family conflict while trying to unlearn the patterns that are ingrained.

I understand that Tia.

Treading on eggshells,

Trying to break that pattern.

Disappointment from my relationship,

Says Marlene.

Parents and children,

Complicated social situations.

Okay,

So can you see how sort of different all of these can be folks?

So let me just start by saying that when we have an issue in our life,

When we have one thing,

And you could probably list 10,

15,

20 things here that at this moment in time or have been or may unfold in the near future for you,

You just know you're going to feel overwhelmed by.

And they can start to define us these things.

You know,

An elderly parent can start to be a total workload.

Having to tiptoe your way through family conflict is exhausting and we become the problem.

It's like we've got a magnifying glass and we've written the problem on a page and we're just focusing on that.

All of our energy is drained into that issue.

So I'd like you to,

If you've got a pen and paper,

Folks,

It would be wonderful.

This is only a short talk,

But I'm trying to pack lots in.

So if you've got a pen and paper,

Just have it handy now because I want to give you a quote that I sent out on my newsletter last week to my subscribers.

Balance is the key to everything in life.

Balance is the key to everything in life.

So you can probably see where I'm going with this,

Folks.

If you and I just face whatever it is we've written in this column here,

It defines us.

It becomes who we are.

We can go to bed thinking about it.

We can wake up thinking about it.

We can dream about it.

It absolutely envelopes us.

But balance is the key to everything in life.

And it is so easy at times when things are pressing us.

It can be anything from not tidying the house to something at work.

It can be anything.

But we forget to take care of ourselves.

Balance is the key to everything in life.

I don't want you to get bored of me saying that.

Balance is the key to everything in life.

A real takeaway.

The logo to my online course,

No expense spared.

I printed this out just before we start.

I actually thought it through.

You can see the dance of life in this very simple logo,

Folks.

And this is other people not watering me.

This is clutter at home.

This is parenting.

This is elderly parents.

This is whatever is overwhelming you.

The uncertainty,

The noise,

The anxiety,

The exhaustion.

But balance is the key to everything in life.

So in essence,

What I'm saying to you,

Folks,

Is overwhelm,

Put simply,

Overwhelm or being burnt out is the absence of balance in your life,

In one aspect of your life or in all of your life.

Burnout or feeling overwhelmed is simply the absence of balance in your life.

Let me just sort of put that into context because we get this when it comes to other things.

If a mechanical part just keeps running by its very nature,

It burns out.

We know that you can't just leave a hairdryer on.

Not that I use a hairdryer very often.

Cheap joke,

I know.

We know that we can't just leave the toaster on.

We know that the oven can't work.

Heavy industry knows.

So if a mechanical part just keeps going,

It burns out.

We know that.

We get it.

We switch things off.

We understand that the tree,

A lovely oak tree that I've got just at the end of the line,

That I'll probably talk about again at the end of this.

We know that if a tree doesn't shed its leaves in autumn,

It burns out.

Something is out of kilter,

Out of balance.

So we accept it.

We embrace it.

You and I get this on a physical level.

We know that we can't just keep running.

We can't just keep shouting.

We can't just keep jumping or swimming.

Something has to give physically.

We become exhausted.

So when we look at the things around us,

Nature,

Mechanical apparatus,

Or when we think of ourselves physically,

We know that something has to give.

We get it.

So why can't we take care of ourselves mentally and emotionally?

Why can't we see that just by keeping going mentally and emotionally is going to take its toll?

Something has to give,

And that's our well-being.

That's when we burn out.

That's when we become overwhelmed in any area of life because,

I'm going to say it again,

Balance is the key to all things in life.

So let me give you an example of how we can maybe reframe the word balance because it's easy for me to say,

You have to find balance.

But how can we reframe it so it makes more sense to us now?

Well,

What about asking yourself the question,

If balance equals what takes care of me?

Now,

It might be a while since you've asked yourself this.

I certainly went many years in my life not stopping and pausing and asking what takes care of me.

So if I'm asking you to find balance in your life,

What about if I was to ask you what takes care of you?

What do you cherish?

What re-energizes you?

What slows you down?

What creates space when you can't breathe with the suffocation of being burnt out?

Now,

If,

And I mean this with all due respect,

Your answers involve maybe a substance that's addictive as a bit of a temporary get-out-of-jail card,

Or if you're struggling to think of things that take care of you,

That bring balance into your life,

You probably know it's time to pause,

To hear this message and start to redefine an area.

So just as you gave me some examples of what burns you out,

Or what overwhelms you,

I'd really love you just to plant some seeds here.

Even if you're not doing them on a regular basis at the moment,

What brings balance to your life?

If you afford yourself some time around these things,

What takes care of you?

Here's our starter for ten.

Marlon,

I walk in the forest.

I'm a tree man myself.

Thank you for the image.

I've got trees written here for me.

So Marlon says,

I walk in the forest.

Morning meditation,

Says Helen.

Creating space.

Getting out of bed on the right side.

Nature's playing a big part.

Look,

There's something about the green,

The heart chakra of nature,

Says Jack.

Linda,

Gardening and being outside.

Painting.

Creating and looking at art.

Trees.

My Sunday morning trips to the lake with my dog.

Wonderful,

Michelle.

Char said,

Nature and connection.

Kags,

Looking at the sea and waves and Wally Woods.

Sorry,

Kags.

Silence,

Maisie.

I'll sign up for that one.

Definitely nature.

Swimming.

Going to the dog.

Thank you,

Caroline.

Listening to Ian Tucker.

I sometimes get a bit bored of his voice,

But you can switch off.

Maybe I can,

Caroline.

Rebecca said,

Yoga and tai chi.

Beautiful.

Walking by the beach,

Carol.

Lovely.

Walking in the park.

Music.

Nature.

The voices of my family.

Bubble baths.

Insight timer.

So suddenly we've changed the energy.

We've changed the focus.

We know what takes care of us.

We know what finds balance.

So here's the thing.

Can we start to build it into each day,

Into each week?

Can we recognise the dance of life is always going to be the dance of life?

We're always going to have the waves,

Folks,

Because otherwise we stay on this flatline clinical existence somewhere between the two.

But it's so important to know that within you,

Just like on some level,

You make a conscious decision to buy into this,

To sign up to that,

To spend your time with that.

What brings this?

Balance is the key to all things in life.

So just five minutes a day,

You would be amazed how you can re-energise yourself.

The power of making a conscious effort to say,

I'm going to step down for a while.

I'm going to pause.

I'm going to breathe.

I'm going to see the ocean.

I'm going to look at the tree.

I'm going to sit in silence.

I'm going to roll the yoga mat out.

I'm going to take care of myself.

Sound baths,

Morning meditations,

Going outside,

Being alone.

It's a choice that turns into a habit.

I agree,

Helen.

Exercise,

G3B.

I hope I've said that right.

Very cool name.

I've gone back to the gym recently for the first time in 20 years.

Even with the music of the gym and the weights and everything else,

It brings me here.

And that's interesting because three things that I've mentioned here for me,

And I think Maisie and one or two others have mentioned it,

Silence.

For so much of my life,

I was loud.

And I've come to know that just becoming silent,

Just being in my own space alone,

Re-energizes me,

Just calms me down,

Brings me to the line under the wave.

And life is a dance.

I've had times in my life when I've spent too long on that line and I've become disconnected.

So I've recognized here that I've gone back to a sport that I played many years ago after 20 years called cricket.

If you're not Australian or British or a country that plays cricket,

I'd need a whole day on Insight Timer to explain the rules.

But I've gone back to cricket for movement,

For connection with like-minded people outside of the to-do lists.

So connection is very important,

But finding time alone is also very important.

And quite a few people have already put trees.

There is an oak tree just at the end of the lane here.

And each step towards that oak tree calms me down.

Whatever I've got going on is less if I'm sitting under that tree for five minutes.

Balance is the key to all things,

To everything in life.

Reviews

Made me cry as I realise how much I push myself. Thank you

Definitely a keeper, for myself And so many of us suffering from burnout. Your wisdom, validation and recommendations are invaluable. thank you.

Thank you Ian for this on your playlist. I am revisiting it this week as part of the exercise following our first session of your 6 week course. Balance is definitely the key to everything in Life.

Awesome! So looking forward to this whole series 😃
Laughing! Nobody said laughing. Listening to this made me laugh quite a lot. Always love your added humour 😅
Dreaming about your oak tree now 🌳😌
Thank you 😊 🙏 💚 ✨

Thank you for this recording. Unfortunately I missed the live event. But listen to this was if I attended the event. Hearing all the names of my lovely friends, gave me a smile on my face. And I know now that I am on the right way when I am searching for the right balance.
Thank you so much 🙏🤍🫂🌞

Thank you for posting this Ian 🙏🏻 I missed notification of the live session and am so grateful to be able to catch up with the first talk 🙏🏻