Start Where You Are

Start where you are. That’s what they say, isn’t it? But what if I don’t like where I am? What if my throat is sore and my headaches and I have a coughing fit every few minutes which distracts me and I forget what I’m supposed to be doing? I may try to settle down to meditate, with the idea that meditation will ‘fix’ me. But what if there is no ‘fixing’ to be done? What if this is just where I’m at right now? Or, as Tara Brach says: “Who am I when I am no longer believing something’s wrong?”

Reviews

Such a calming voice, helped slow my mind down. Loved the ocean sound in background. Not too noisy. Simple & calming. Thank you 🙏🏻

Just what I needed this morning ... getting weary of winter and overwhelmed by people, places and things I’m powerless over. Ocean waves and hope. 💫Acceptance is the key to peace. I followed this with the serenity prayer. 🙏🏼 Ty!!💕

This was very important for me to hear right now. I was struggling with overwhelm and so much I need and want to do, paralyzed into inaction instead of taking action. To be completely honest, I didn't hear much of the middle of your text. I tuned in, settled down, dropped my mind downward as you guided, and then a sudden sense of calm and stillness came over me, with a gentle internal voice reminding me to breathe, it will be fine, I simply need to create a reasonable plan I can stick to in order to work my way out from underneath all that I feel is on my plate. A schedule for simplicity, beginning with a list of all things I want and feel I need to do (two separate columns), then crossing out those that do not represent who I truly am and where my life journey is leading me. One of those items is decluttering and minimizing my material possessions to I've myself space to breathe and simply "be" in my world.

I also came to a conclusion and decision on a proposal my spouse made that would be a major investiture, but I now feel comfortable that my decision is my own and not due to outside pressure. All the while, I distantly heard your voice in the background, calm and soothing, though again, I am not sure what you were saying. The crashing waves were more helpful than I anticipated, too. I live near the ocean, or did, for about 15 years - I'm now about 45 minutes away but continue to work where I lived before, so seagulls and ocean smells are still a part of my daily experience most days. I have always liked the beach for watching waves, the sounds, the sunrises and sunsets, for walking and shell/stone collecting, but not much else. With medical issues, walking in sand, the salty breeze and lack of shelter from the sun are all highly problematic, so going to the beach has rarely been my idea of a relaxing experience. That said, I also have not thought of using waves as a soundtrack for a practice at home. I should have thought of this when I was at an Oceanside conference for work and had a hotel room with a balcony that overlooked the oceanfront. I awoke and threw open the sliding door to let the waves wash my room in sound, and sat on my bench in the open doorway for my morning meditation as the sun rose over the water and slowly painted me in light from knees to head as it did so. One of the more profound meditative sessions I had ever experienced, and was loathe to rise up to be on time for the first session of the day's agenda.

I will take the idea of using waves to enhance my practice with me. I'm more of a mountain and forest type (grew up in that setting) but it is good to know other environments can be effective as well. I felt your practice, what I heard of it, was instrumental in allowing me to sink this deeply, when initially upon sitting down, thoughts of needing to get my laundry sorted and started were in the forefront of my mind. I started coming up from those depths of contemplative experience just about the time I became aware that you were concluding the practice. I am unsure if the two are related or not.

Either way, this was a subtly and gently transformative experience for me. It wasn't a huge flash of insight, more like the gentle brightening of sunlight as the sun rises, but shines brightly to illuminate one's path nonetheless. It was the gentle crackle of a durable hearth fire rather than the blazing torrent if flames from a bonfire. And as it turns out, this practice was precisely what I needed today.

I've bookmarked and will be downloading this for future listens and use. Perhaps I will finally get to hear your words at some point. Meanwhile, I am ever so grateful you shared this so I could actually hear and listen to my own inner words. It had been far too long. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I see the light within you. 🤲🏻❤️🤲🏻