Releasing Judgment

This is a mindful meditative practice to help you become more aware of our tendency to judge ourselves and others, to understand the negative impact of doing so, and to learn to replace judgment with discernment. It consists of a 5-minute discourse, followed by a 7-minute guided meditation.
Music by John Bartmann (Interstellar Space, Home at Last), G.S. Renfrey (Eos), and Shady Dave (Under the Stars, Feelings of Twilight).
Photo by Tetyana Kovyrina on Pexels

Transcript

Meditations for Deep Living Today Releasing Judgment Judgment There are positive meanings to the word of course,

Such as the ability to make considered decisions,

Come to sensible conclusions,

Or make estimations.

There's another meaning,

However,

That reflects one of the most pervasive and toxic habits in our culture.

This version means to criticize or condemn,

Usually from an assumed higher moral ground.

Closely associated are the likes of disapproval,

Denunciation,

Accusation,

And blame.

Even the briefest look at the news and social media will make it clear just how strong this tendency is to judge in our modern world.

It's a ubiquitous phenomena,

Often disguised as needed discernment,

But is in fact a powerful source of divisiveness,

Conflict,

And alienation.

But as pervasive and destructive as judgment may be in the culture at large,

It's even more so within the hearts and minds of most of us.

Consider this.

Each time we judge another person or event,

We create a negative emotional state within ourselves,

Usually some variant of anger or indignation,

And at the same time we paint our perception of the world,

Of life,

As being a little darker and more hostile.

When we judge people and events that are outside our sphere of influence,

We also risk creating a sense of helplessness in the face of the wrongdoing.

This tendency to judge can be an unconscious habit that tunes us into that which is objectionable in our world.

Over time,

If the habit is strong enough,

It can lead to cynicism and a general mistrust of others,

If not life itself.

Those who have fallen into this trap often view their cynicism as protection from a hostile world,

But in fact it's simply a toxic habit that crushes the spirit,

Wears away at optimism and happiness,

And taints relationships with others.

Perhaps most damaging,

However,

Is that the habit of judgment doesn't discriminate between our outer and inner worlds.

As the saying goes,

Point a finger and you have three pointing back.

Even Christian scriptures advise us not to judge,

Lest we be judged.

As we do to others in the outside world,

We do to ourselves,

But because we are present with ourselves,

Day and night,

We end up with countless opportunities to find fault.

In my work as a clinical psychologist,

I've found that the most deeply unhappy people are often those with the strongest habits of judgment.

I've witnessed how their relentless scrutiny of the worlds on both sides of their skin and the perceptual bias to finding fault in what they perceive,

Imprisons them in a hostile world.

Take heart,

This malaise we all suffer is,

After all,

Only a habit,

And just as it was learned,

It can be unlearned.

In freeing ourselves from judgment,

We don't lose the ability to discern right from wrong or desirable from undesirable,

But we do rid ourselves of the toxic effect that judgment has on ourselves and our world.

Unlearning the habit can be tricky,

But it can start at this very moment.

A challenge I put to many of my clients is to try to get through a 24-hour period without judging a single person,

Thing,

Or event.

It sounds simple,

But no one has yet to be able to do it on the first try.

The attempt,

However,

Can make us acutely aware of just how often we do judge,

And the first step to change is awareness.

Once awakened to this,

There are numerous mindfulness and cognitive techniques available to facilitate the transformation.

The purpose of this short guided meditation is to help you explore your habit of judgment and to practice turning judgment into simple discernment.

So if you please,

Sit or lie in a comfortable position,

Close your eyes,

And relax.

It's time to be present,

Here and now.

To begin,

Take in a full breath,

Feeling it fill your chest,

And then release it.

Repeat this a few times,

Imagining the in-breath is filling any tense spaces in your body and carrying it away on the exhalation.

Grounding and relaxation can often be enhanced by imagining body sensations that typically accompany a deeply relaxed state.

For example,

Imagine now what it might feel like if the muscles of your body became as heavy and soft as warm clay.

Imagine the sensations in your legs,

Your torso,

Your arms and shoulders,

Your face.

Take another full breath and become aware of the subtle tension in your chest as your muscles work to draw in the air.

Then release the breath and be aware of the changes in sensation.

Repeat this for a few breaths,

Directing your awareness to the sensations that accompany this natural rhythm.

Now take a moment to recall some act of judgment you made recently.

It could be something that happened within your personal life or perhaps something in the world at large that you heard about through the media.

Pick an instance that has some meaning for you and which created an emotional reaction.

If you have difficulty with this,

Feel free to pause here and give yourself more time.

When you've identified a recent incident,

Recall it with as much detail as you can muster.

Spend a few minutes here recalling the situation and the thoughts and feelings you had about it.

After you do this,

Reflect on how you feel right now by merely recalling it.

Now take in a deep breath and let that recollection go.

Often,

An effective way of detaching from a troubling recollection is to visualize the incident and imagine it zooming back in space until it's a very small point.

When you've detached from the memory,

Take a minute to reground yourself in the peacefulness of the present moment.

Focus on your breath.

Focus on the sensations in your body.

Recognize that there is nothing wrong here and now.

So I'd like you to revisit that same instance of judgment but do so starting at a distance.

What would you see if it occurred a mile away?

If you still get an emotional reaction from viewing things at that distance,

Push it back further.

Once your emotions are negligible,

Slowly zoom the image in closer until you can make out what's happening and what's at stake.

When you do this,

Stay connected to the sense of peace and well-being that grounding in the here and now brought you.

Look at the situation with discerning yet compassionate eyes.

Simply examine the facts of the situation and label them as desirable or undesirable,

Healthy or unhealthy,

Or whatever label of non-judgmental discernment fits.

Do so in a manner that is not accompanied by any thoughts of condemnation or negative emotion.

If you find yourself slipping back into judgment,

Then simply pull back in your mind's eye,

Reground yourself,

And revisit the situation with renewed objectivity,

How someone might who is not personally invested in the situation in any way.

Play with this process until you can look at the situation with discerning attachment and without distressing or otherwise negative feelings.

So now,

If you please,

Prepare to come back fully to the present moment.

Take a minute to ground yourself with your breathing.

Judgment is one of the most harmful mental habits we can entertain.

Ridding yourself of it and replacing it with rational discernment is one of the best investments in your mental well-being and happiness you can make.

If you do decide to take on the challenge of trying to get through a single day without judgment,

Take notice each time you find yourself caught up in it,

Then take a few moments to transform that judgment into discernment.

Be forewarned,

Judgment is like a mind virus.

It is not only pernicious,

It can be self-maintaining and very difficult to eradicate.

It will weaken and dissolve with time and patience,

However,

And that is something you will never regret.

Thank you for taking the time to meditate with me today.

May you be warm and safe,

And may you live in peace and happiness.

Reviews

I found this to be incredibly helpful. Thank you so much for sharing 🙏🏻

Excellent. I thought this was a great talk and exercise in non-judgement.

This helped me release judgment of people around me, enhance my inner peace, and hopefully improve my relationships with others.

What an amazing guided meditation to change the automatic judgement thought process inside. Thank you for this, will approach difficult situations with an open mind.

An amazing starting point on my journey of unearthing and releasing judgment of self and others. Thank you!

Fantastic! I am going to recommend to my group on Insight Timer, Detroit Center for Spiritual Living as it fits todays affirmation from the science of Mind magazine “I am thankful to be accepting, to live and let live and to know I don’t as much as I want to believe I know.” May 5, 2022

Very thought-provoking and challenging. But I really do want to let judgement go! Thank you for this useful guide. 🙏

George thank you for this very constructive and beautiful meditation it was very well executed and efficiently presented ...I hope you have a beautiful amazing judge mental free day 😊 Namaste

Wonderful perspective and so intriguing, interesting and insightful. Thank you 🙏🏻, I will revisit those meditation. 💖

Wow. That was powerful. I have much work to do and thank you for this insight and technique.

Spot on! Great advice, insight. Thank you 🌷

Thank you! This is a habit I need to work on and appreciate the information/meditation!

Useful.....definitely something to come back to again and again, to improve my way of thinking and to cast aside negative judgment.

Excellent reminder and suggested corrective practice.

Nice brain training technique , definitely going for the one day at a time challenge🙏👍thx

This session offered an interesting and helpful perspective on judgement and a useful exercise on shifting how we see things. Thank you.

I've been reprogramming and healing from a lifetime of judgement both upon and from me. Earlier today I was aware of a judgement I was making which disturbed me. While delving deep I experienced the buried energy of self judgement. Not pleasant, yet freeing to release it. Then later I came across this meditation and I'd like to extend my Gratitude 🌟💛as it was like a Healing Balm.🌸💜So Thankyou for your Shared Wisdom . I love that timing is everything. Namaste 🌀💙🙏

Amazing! I’m going to try the challenge tomorrow... thank you for sharing