Selfgentleness In Action - S2: Love Is All Around

How can you connect with the feeling of love when you deep down feel that you're not worthy enough? Femke discusses in the second session of her Selfgentleness in Action Lives how you can use Selfgentleness to connect to your innate capacity to feel love, within you and all around.

Join Femke's Lives every second Friday of the Month in person, and ask your questions! Sign up for her Insight Timer Lives via Femke's profile.

Transcript

Hi everyone!

My screen froze for a moment,

So I was not sure if I was there.

But hi everyone!

My name is Femke Bakker and I'm a Self-Gentleness teacher here on Insight Timer.

And we are here for my monthly live,

Self-Gentleness in Action.

And today's topic is Love is All Around.

Of course,

I've chosen that title,

That topic,

Because today is the 14th of February,

Which is for some people Valentine's Day and for some people it is a day that they do not like.

For all kinds of reasons,

Whether you think Valentine's Day is just a commercial thing going on or it's something that reminds you of a way of love that you might not have in your life,

Or you might find it the most romantic day in the world,

It doesn't matter,

Because love is all around.

And the secret is,

Not just today on the 14th of February,

But every day,

Every hour,

Every minute,

Every second of every day,

365 days a year,

Love is all around.

And we're going to speak about that.

But before I start,

I would love to hear who you are and where you are in the world and what love is to you,

What it means to you.

So again,

My name is Femke Bakker,

Self-Gentleness teacher here on Insight Timer.

And every second Friday of the month,

You can find me here at this time for a Self-Gentleness in Action live on Insight Timer.

Hi Richard,

Lovely that you could join.

Really nice.

Richard,

Guys,

He is a fellow Insight Timer teacher.

Check out his profile after this live and see if you can follow him and listen to his work.

It's really amazing.

I really recommend it.

Hi Petta,

Lovely to see you.

Good morning to you.

Hi Luanne,

Luanne is having a good sunny afternoon.

I'm so happy to hear that.

And Luanne,

Spring is closing by,

Right?

We're entering already the half of February,

A little bit few more weeks.

You're counting the days.

Let us know how many more days until spring starts.

Lovely that you are here.

Hi Lindsay,

Richard is in Penticton and love means I know I am okay.

Yeah,

That's really powerful.

That's really great.

Thank you for sharing that.

Hi Lizzie from New York.

You've had a lot of challenges this year and you haven't been here in a long time.

Glad to be back.

Well,

I'm also really glad that you're here,

Lizzie,

And that you could join me today.

Welcome back.

Marjorie,

Hi Marjorie.

You've been also away for a while.

I'm also really happy to see you.

Thank you for joining me today.

And Elizabeth in bed,

Just waking up in South Australia.

Good morning to you.

Much love.

Best felt connecting in nature.

Yeah,

Nature is that really wonderful place where we can make a connection with ourselves and with love.

Because,

As I will tell you in a minute,

I think we are all love.

Petta is also in Northern Australia.

Love is opening my heart and flowing with compassion and connection.

Oh,

That's really beautiful,

Petta.

Thank you so much for sharing that.

I really love that.

And this is another Elizabeth from Switzerland.

A Valentine's Day present to myself to be here.

So welcome.

I'm so happy that this is your Valentine's present.

I'm so happy to be part of that.

Thank you for sharing that.

And Petta sees Arlene,

Marjorie,

Jane.

Hi,

Lori.

Lovely that you are here.

All right.

So let me take a sip of water.

And let's start the life,

Right?

Before we do,

I have something to read for you.

While I was sitting here and preparing for speaking about love is all around,

Which in the core is about self-gentleness,

About which I will speak.

I also thought love is such a beautiful thing in my life,

For a big part of my life.

I think I've been always quite good in loving other people unconditionally.

But I was not always so good at loving myself unconditionally.

And well,

That was a whole journey that brought me self-gentleness,

About which I tell you often a lot.

And if you're here for the first time,

You will hear more about that.

And by becoming self-gentle,

The meaning of love changed for me.

And I think that is something that might resonate with you.

When we hear that word love,

There are so many connotations that we might have,

Right?

That's why I asked you,

What is love to you?

We remember one of our parents being angry at us and shouting,

Yes,

I love you,

But,

Right?

Which is kind of a mixed message when you're a kid,

And you cannot put that into perspective,

Just to say something.

And you might feel love for someone which is not reciprocated.

What is that meaning of love then?

Should it hurt?

So all my teachings about self-gentleness are in essence about self-love.

But that word love and self-love,

I have to love myself,

That sounds like such a big deal.

But when we think of being gentle with ourselves,

That's way easier,

Because we all know these moments where we are gentle with ourselves.

And then,

Of course,

The trick is,

Because my definition is radically accepting yourself as the most important person to consistently deserve your own gentleness.

And when you hear that,

You know already,

Okay,

So I want to expand from the small gentle moment that I am familiar with,

Those moments that I feel I deserve my own gentleness,

That I will expand that.

So back to my story,

What I wanted to tell you is that by becoming more and more self-gentle,

I also opened myself up to experience love in a relationship with my partner that I've never had before.

And I think that's partly me,

And that is partly him,

Because he's a really special person.

And when you look in my premium tracks on Insight Timer,

You might see there a playlist of 20 love poems.

Well,

That's just the tip of the iceberg,

Because I will tell you,

I've written hundreds of poems for him,

For my love.

A lot also in Dutch,

Which is my native language,

But also several in English.

And 20 are out there,

So if you have a premium Insight Timer account,

Which I would recommend to everyone,

Because you can hear the most amazing things,

Including all those beautiful courses that we as teachers are making for you,

And all those beautiful premium tracks.

But I just want to start today,

Love is all around,

By reading to you one of those poems as a tribute to my love for my partner and his love for me.

So the title is True Love.

True love is to surrender to every inch of past hurt,

To every splash of joy,

To ups and downs,

And every moment in time,

Because I love you.

True love is to surrender to that vulnerable heart of me that wants to beat just for you,

But knows it needs to beat also for me,

Because I love you.

True love is to surrender all superficial ideas about what love is.

It is just to love you dearly,

Here and now and always,

With braveness in my heart,

Because I love you.

So if you want to hear it again,

And maybe a little bit better edited,

You can listen to this in my playlist of the love poems that you can find.

And I remember that I recorded them,

And I was hesitating to put them on inside timer,

Because in a sense,

These are really vulnerable little stories about love and what love can do,

How love can be healing for your soul,

For a relationship,

For actually the way you look at the world.

So in the end,

I decided to share them,

And I got a lot of beautiful responses.

I also know from many of you,

So I want to share this today with you.

All right,

So love is all around.

Well,

I already told you a little bit about it,

How I see that.

That self-gentleness is in essence a way to that self-love and love.

But when we speak about love,

We very often don't think so much about the love.

We hold for ourselves,

We think of the love that we feel for others,

Or the love from others for us that we are longing for,

That we are wishing for,

Or that we are experiencing.

And sometimes you hear people say,

You cannot really find love if you don't love yourself.

And I never like it when people say that.

I know,

Especially in a spiritual community,

A lot of people are saying that.

And there might be some truth in that,

But I don't like it.

Because when you say things like that,

You put a burden on people.

Oh,

Because I don't love myself,

Other people cannot love me.

And that's not true.

Because there are a lot of people loving people who are not loving themselves.

That is really true.

When we speak about relationships and how your old wounds might consciously or not consciously force you to live out those old wounds,

The old patterns that you build up with your parents or your family or previous partners,

And that you relive this.

Yes,

This can be an element which can make relationships hard.

But finding love is always possible.

Just like finding love for yourself is always possible.

So whenever you hear that and you think,

Well,

Maybe I do not have the love that I like in my life,

And that is because I don't love myself,

Then really let that go.

That's not gentle to think that.

You just can let that go.

The best way to start with loving yourself,

Because in the end,

That's always a good thing,

But it always starts with being gentle with yourself.

By,

It's so easy to beat yourself up when you start to notice that you're not gentle with yourself,

That you're not so loving with yourself,

That you're listening to that inner critic.

But the process about all of this,

It's all about being gentle with yourself.

Being gentle with yourself in that process.

So I have this course here on Insight Timer,

Start Being Self-Gentle Today.

And I saw today,

It's now almost 9,

000 people who took this course,

Which is really humbling.

And I'm so proud of that,

Because so many people are really,

Really enjoying what they are learning there about themselves.

And they're very often see questions or experience that people share.

And one of the things that comes up a lot is that they're saying,

Well,

I'm aware now that I'm not self-gentle,

But I can beat myself up because I'm not.

And I really want to do this,

But I do not know how.

And that is a frustrating thing.

And of course,

That's a big paradox.

But it's actually very easy,

Because it all starts with awareness.

It starts with becoming aware of what is going on within you,

Every minute of every moment.

And that can differ,

Right?

What's going on now is something else than what happens in an hour or in a day or in a week.

But tuning in,

Becoming aware of what it is that is going on,

And it generally starts with when you start to hear that,

What it is that you do not want in your life,

What doesn't feel good,

What feels unpleasant.

And then the next step is to start to allow yourself to recognize what it is that you need right now,

Or what you would want or wish or desire for yourself.

And then the next step is that you start to honor that in that process,

So that you start to allow yourself that gentleness in,

To feel what it is,

To feel what you need.

And of course,

That is a process that cannot be easy all the time.

First of all,

Because you've lived all your life not being always so self-gentle.

So it's a new process.

And depending on the age that you have,

It took you many years to come here where you are right now.

So it's okay to take more time to start to learn to be self-gentle.

The second thing is that when you become aware,

And you can become aware you want to do something with it,

You still will have to find your unique way of how to allow these things in.

And that's a process.

That's a process that,

Well,

Frankly,

That's a lifelong process.

I always call this a lifelong work-in-progress process,

Because that is what it is.

So as an example,

I'm a master at self-gentleness.

But that doesn't mean that I'm self-gentle all the time.

No,

It means that I very quickly recognize when I'm not self-gentle.

And it might surprise you,

But yeah,

That happens also to me.

At least once a day,

And very often more than once a day.

But I recognize it.

And then I know now it's up to me to find back my way to that gentleness.

And sometimes the awareness is okay to just let go.

And sometimes it takes me longer.

And when a topic is really hard,

It might even take me quite some time to get there.

And there are some topics in my life that they pop up from time to time.

And every time it feels like a challenge to find that self-gentleness again.

But that is okay.

Approaching this as a lifelong work-in-progress process is the most self-gentle thing that you can do.

And actually also the most beautiful thing,

Because it is part of living,

Part of life.

So when I say that love is all around the topic of today,

Then I can tell you from my own personal experience that this is something that I started to experience when I started my self-gentleness process.

Because allowing yourself to feel as good as you can feel in any moment,

Because that is in the end what it gives to you,

That self-gentleness.

And with good,

I do not mean that you're on high,

Cheerful,

Positive vibes all the time.

No,

It means that you can be at ease with where you are.

It means that if you're sad,

That you can allow yourself to be sad and to comfort yourself so that you feel cherished and loved again,

Right?

I'm not speaking about some big overarching notion of all the time have to be happy.

I'm speaking about recognizing how you can feel good.

And when you allow yourself more and more to get there,

Then there comes a connection with yourself,

With your,

Let's say,

There are different words to give it,

With your inner voice,

With your soul,

With your inner being,

With the God or the Goddess within you.

Or maybe for some,

It feels actually like a connection to something divine,

God,

The universe,

Source,

Whatever word you might mean.

So whether this is within you or that you feel that you are part of something bigger than that,

That place is where you can feel that love is all around.

And if you've been here more often,

You might know that when I guide you in a visualization,

Then there will always be those words at a certain point where I say,

You're worthy,

You are lovable.

Or even I prefer to stand in your shoes and to say for you,

With you,

I am lovable,

I am worthy.

Because that is something,

That knowing,

That intrinsic knowing of that inner part of you,

That bigger part of you,

That soul part of you,

That inner being part of you,

To really know that,

But not just with your head,

But with your gut,

With your heart,

With your body,

With everything in you,

Then you truly know that love is all around.

And when love is all around,

It means that every second of every moment,

You can have access to that love that is all around.

So then it doesn't matter anymore what kind of date it is,

Whether we celebrate a love day or not,

It doesn't matter anymore if you have one part or two or three or zero,

It doesn't matter who is there to love you or not,

Because you have access to that feeling.

Now,

I know I started some time ago by saying that you should never buy into the fact that people might say that you will never find love if you don't love yourself.

Because it might seem that I'm contradicting this now,

But I'm not.

I'm telling you that you can always,

You always have the capacity to connect with yourself and then to connect with that feeling in love,

Because this is you.

So what I believe,

And you don't have to believe this with me,

I'm not your guru who's telling you how the world is.

I'm just telling you my personal belief.

And from this,

All my teachings come.

And that is,

We are all made of love.

And sometimes we forget that.

Sometimes we cannot really connect that.

And that is okay.

Life happens.

Things happen.

But when you notice that it happens,

Then try to find your way back again.

And that gentleness is a very approachable,

Easy,

Gentle way to start going there.

To allow yourself,

Step by step,

Finding that way.

No big promises,

No big expectations.

Just you searching and feeling for what feels a little bit better than how you're feeling now.

That is that self-gentleness.

So what I really would love to do is to see if there are any questions to answer,

And then to take you in this beautiful meditation where you are going to experience together with everyone here,

Together with me,

How it is to connect to that inherent knowing,

Feeling that love is all around.

Because you are love.

Every one of you.

Not just every one of you.

Every being.

Not every human being.

Every being is love,

Is part of that love.

And it feels delicious and energizing and soothing to connect to that feeling.

And that is what we're going to do in a few minutes in the meditation.

So if you have a question or you want to share an experience,

By all means,

Now is the moment.

Or you can also wait till after the meditation.

That is also perfectly fine.

So let's see.

Oh,

I really want to share this.

Luenza's spring is in 33 days,

13 hours,

29 minutes,

42 seconds.

And she said that 18 minutes ago.

So it's a little bit closer even since.

Oh,

Thank you,

Richard,

For listening to the poems.

Yeah.

Hi,

George.

Good morning to you from Sydney.

You're missing your pet friend.

Oh,

I'm so sorry.

Yeah,

I'm so sorry.

Well,

I don't know.

In my free tracks,

There is a meditation which is called When You're Missing Someone.

And it's a beautiful meditation which is really soothing and supporting and connecting you with the love that you have for your pet friend or whoever you want to remember and connect with.

So you might try that to see if it will help you to connect with your pet friend again.

Well,

You're most welcome,

Belinda.

Thank you.

Marjorie says that that's just one more way of blaming us for being alone,

Piling insult on top of injury.

Yes,

Exactly.

It's probably in response to what I said.

So let go of all those notions.

Hi,

Madeline.

Um,

Kirsten says,

Hi.

Lisa says,

Yes,

Every being.

Yes,

Kindness to all kinds.

Kirsten says,

I think I will fall asleep soon,

But I try to listen as long as I can.

Yeah,

Kirsten,

Lie down,

You know,

And just let my voice help you fall asleep.

Nothing is better than falling asleep with feeling a lot of love.

So sleep well for now already.

Greg is from Italy on vacation from Toronto snowstorms.

So happy to make this my first inside timer live event.

Ooh,

Your very first inside timer live event.

I'm so happy that you're here.

Welcome and lovely that you are in Italy.

Much warmer than the snowstorms in Toronto,

I guess.

All right,

Let's go.

Um,

So before I start,

I would like you to think of a person that you love dearly and who loves you dearly.

It doesn't matter so much if they're still in your life or not anymore.

As long as you know this is someone that you really feel that love for.

Yeah,

All right.

I'm telling you now because when we're in the meditation,

I'm asking you to think of this person,

Then you will not overthink it.

You've decided now who you're going to pick.

All right.

Okay,

So let's first start with being comfortable,

Sitting comfortable and really make yourself comfortable the way that you like.

You can stand up,

You can sit down,

You can lie down.

And if you're sitting,

Then really sit in a way that is comfortable for you.

So if you like to sit up straight,

Cross-legged,

And that's really cool for you,

Then do that.

But if that is not your forty,

Lean against the back of your chair,

Make yourself comfortable.

This is your moment and it should be good,

Feeling good for you.

You can put your hands relaxed in your lap.

I always love to put my palms up to the sky because it gives me a sense of openness.

And if it feels the same for you,

You could do that too.

Now,

Close your eyes and just be aware for a moment of how you're sitting on your bum,

How your feet are resting on the ground.

And your feet,

It's not just your foot on the ground,

Right?

Your feet have different touch points that have their own pressure,

Their own connection with the earth below you.

It's a wonderful feeling to bring your attention to your feet because there immediately comes this sense of connection with the earth below you.

Let's spend a little bit of time in feeling the love of earth.

So bring all your attention to your feet and let's enhance that attention by using your fantasy and imagining that there are roots,

Roots shooting out of your feet into the ground,

Into the earth.

Beautiful roots growing deeply and widely into the earth.

And you feel how earth,

Mother earth,

Planet earth is receiving your roots with such love,

With such openness and welcomeness receiving you.

And you notice that these roots are growing deeply within the earth all the way to this fiery core of mother earth,

This fiery core that makes sure that the earth is spinning around her own axis.

It's spinning this beautiful orbit around a beautiful sun,

Making sure that gravity is here to make us feel connected and supported and carried with this enormous speed through the universe.

Mother earth is making sure that we are safe,

Carried and supported.

Now your roots are connected with that fiery core and you see that beautiful earth energy is now coming into your roots,

Shooting up all the way through those roots into your feet.

And you could give it a color if you like.

You could give it this really dark,

Warm orange color or you could make it green,

Which I always associate with mother earth or blue.

Whatever the color is,

Pick one that you like and that you would like to see flowing through your body because that is what is happening through the roots into your feet,

Into your ankles,

Your calves,

Your knees,

Up to your thighs,

Your bum,

Your pelvis,

Filling your whole belly from front to back and going up,

Filling you,

Your chest,

Your shoulders,

Your arms,

It's going in your upper arms,

Your lower arms,

Into your hands,

Tripling out of your fingers.

It's going up into your neck,

Filling your whole head and like there is a fountain on the crown of your head,

This beautiful energy is now coming out there.

Now pay attention for a moment to this beautiful connection.

Feeling this grounding energy of mother earth,

So supportive of you,

So loving.

It makes you feel connected to all beings on earth,

All the plants,

All the animals,

All the human beings,

Feeling how mother earth loves us,

How she feeds us,

She grows crops that we can use for feeding,

She makes sure that we are on this planet,

She turns her cheeks to the sun so we can feel the warmth of the sun and thrive in that.

This is love.

Feeling your feet on the ground,

Feeling the connection with this beautiful planet that we live on,

That is realizing that love is all around.

All right,

Now you can relax your attention again.

Let's go back to your body and just feel how you're sitting again on your bum,

Feet on the ground.

Can you feel something different from how you started?

You don't really have to make it very aware,

Just notice and let go of the attention.

And if you feel there's still some tension somewhere in your body,

Then just make a little bit more tension and then relax it.

So if you notice you have a tension in your belly,

Then just pull your belly in and then drop it.

Yeah,

You might want to repeat that if the tension is really strong or when you feel that your shoulders are tense,

Then just pull them up as high as you can to your ears and then just drop them.

Yeah,

You can have this awareness now that you're a little bit more relaxed than you started.

You feel a little bit more grounded,

Maybe a little bit more supported.

Let's go to your heart in the middle of your chest.

If you like,

You can put your hands there.

And very gently,

With ease,

You bring your attention to your heart in the middle of your chest.

And if you find it hard to focus on that spot of your heart,

Then just imagine that there is a little light shining there with a beautiful color that you love.

Gently let your attention go there.

If you notice that you still have a lot of thoughts,

Then that's okay.

And imagine that you are now in the middle of your head.

And that you just slowly,

Slowly,

Like there is an inner elevator,

An inner lift slowly taking you down through your neck,

Into your chest,

And you're landing in your heart.

Yeah,

Exactly.

Well done.

Such a lovely feeling when you make the connection with your own heart.

And if you feel that you might get emotional,

Whatever the emotion is,

Whether it feels pleasant or unpleasant,

That's okay.

You're connecting with your heart.

That is the place where you become aware of what is going on within you.

That is the place where you become aware of what emotions,

What feelings are prevalent at this moment in your life.

This is the place where you can acknowledge that it is okay,

That you feel how you feel.

That's okay.

You are okay.

You are so very okay.

Now,

Remember that I asked you to think of a person that loves you so much,

That you love them so much.

Now use your fantasy again to get a feel of their presence in front of you.

So,

If you are someone who fantasizes with images,

Then you see that.

You see them.

But if you are someone who is fantasizing in a different way by words or feelings or knowing,

Then use that way of fantasizing.

You cannot do this wrong.

Just use your fantasy and get a feel of this loving person just in front of you.

They're standing and they're looking at you.

And when they look at you,

You see their eyes,

So happy to see you,

So much love.

You cannot help but smile when you see them.

It might move you even a little bit,

But that is also okay.

Now imagine while they're standing there,

That they are expressing their love to you.

And they do this in a way that you know so well of them.

So maybe they just tell you,

I love you.

Maybe they just smile at you.

Maybe they come to you and give you a hug.

Whatever they want to do to express their love,

It is okay.

Just let's take half a minute to experience that for yourself.

And as they're expressing their love for you,

You can feel that their love is flowing to you.

If you have an image with that,

But use your fantasy to use it for yourself in a way that feels good to you.

But in image terms,

It is as if there is this really big,

Beautiful laser beam of love that is going from their heart straight to yours.

It is flowing and you feel how your own heart is open and receiving all this love.

And this is filling you again,

Just like the love of Mother Earth was just filling you up with this beautiful support of grounding love.

Now this person that loves you so much is sending all so much love.

It is a never ending stream of love.

It is as if they are connected to this big,

Eternal field of love and that they are channeling all this love right into your heart.

And from your heart,

You feel how it starts to spread,

How it fills you up.

First,

Your heart,

Then your chest,

And then it moves also into your belly,

Your buttocks,

Your pelvis,

Your legs,

Your thighs,

Your knees,

Your calves,

And ankles,

And feet.

And it shoots into those roots.

It is connecting with the earth.

And it is also going up into your shoulders,

Your arms.

And it is really shooting out of your fingers.

There is so much love.

It just pours through you.

And it goes up into your neck,

Into your head,

And also it now shoots out of the crown of your head.

And it is not stopping.

This flow of love,

Of this beautiful,

Loving,

Unconditional loving person is flowing all through you.

And it feels so good.

It feels so good.

And I would like you to say for a moment,

Together with me,

Love is all around.

You can say it out loud,

Or if you're not alone,

Then you can also just say it mentally.

But if you can say it out loud,

Just say it with me.

Love is all around.

Love is all around.

Mother Earth is giving me all the love that she has,

Non-stop.

People who love me,

Like this person,

Are sending me their love non-stop,

Always.

I just have to be aware of this,

And tune in to realize that this is always here.

It doesn't stop when I don't see them.

It doesn't stop when they might be angry,

Or not looking or thinking of me,

Because they love me.

It's always there.

Love is all around.

All right.

And now to show you,

To let you experience that love is truly all around for you,

Always.

You're going to experience where your own love resides.

So thank this person that loves you so much for giving you this experience,

This knowledge,

This deep,

Inherent knowledge that you are loved,

Always.

And then bring your attention back to your heart,

That your heart feels so warm and loved,

And open,

And gentle,

And vulnerable in such a good way.

It feels so good to connect with your heart now.

There's a sense of lightness there,

A sense of soothing power that feels so good.

Now imagine that all that love that you just received is there in your heart,

Shining,

Swirling,

Sparkling,

Filling you.

And it's filling your whole body again.

And while it's expanding now from your heart into your whole body,

You feel it's even expanding outside your body.

From the core of your heart,

This love,

This light is shining now as if you are in this big bubble of loving light,

Lighting love.

And you know what?

When you feel that you're in this bubble of light and love,

You feel so lighthearted that you can float.

And if you like,

You can float together with me and everyone so you feel how this bubble of love is lifting you up.

You're now above your own house.

It's going pretty quickly now.

You can see your whole country.

It's beautiful.

If it's night with you,

You see everywhere lights.

And if it's day with you,

Then you see the sun shining.

Maybe you see some snow falling.

And you feel how this lightheartedness is so good because it brings you to a different perspective when you look down at your own life and you realize that when you feel,

When you allow that love in your body,

In your mind,

In your being,

That you can take a distance of things that are taking you down,

Of things that are pulling you down.

And while you're here,

Just realize that there are many,

Many people here right now,

All over the world,

From Australia,

New Zealand,

In Europe,

In the Americas.

So many people.

I think something like 250 people signed up to be here.

I do not know if they're all here,

But so many people here are now experiencing this.

And if you use your fantasy,

You might even see them,

All these beautiful,

Loving people who just filled themselves up with the love of Mother Earth,

The love of a loved one,

With the love of their own heart.

And they're floating here now,

Taking a different perspective on Mother Earth,

Life there,

Our lives,

Our lives from which we sometimes think that it is to pull us down,

To make us have unpleasant experiences.

But the truth is,

Love is all around.

And with a few simple steps,

You can just allow yourself to feel that love flowing through you,

To feel that love lifting you up,

Making you just know that everything is okay,

Here and now,

With yourself,

With your own love.

If you see those other people and you would like to do that,

You could even expand your bubble of love and light and to make it so big that you encompass them as well.

You encompass the whole planet Earth and every being on it.

And if we all do this,

Then there is this really,

Really big circle of love.

And that feels so good,

That feels so safe,

So uplifting.

And no matter what is going on in your life,

And I know things are going on in our lives,

I don't want to put that down or make it any smaller,

But it is really good to know and feel and realize that you have the capacity to also feel like this,

Whenever you want,

Whenever you need it.

And that's such a powerful knowing,

That's such a beautiful knowing,

That's such a loving knowing,

That love is all around.

So if you like,

You can put your hands on your chest again,

To really,

Really imprinted knowledge.

And I will speak the words as if I'm standing in your shoes,

And if you like,

You can repeat them after me out loud,

Or mentally,

Whatever you like.

And these are the words that I would like you to really,

Really acknowledge to yourself.

I am love.

I am love.

Yeah,

Yeah,

I am love.

I'm lovable.

I'm worthy.

I am special.

I am unique.

I am uniquely me.

With everything that comes with me,

Worth and all,

Shameful feelings and happy feelings,

Things I can and cannot do,

This is me and I am lovable.

I am worthy.

I am love.

Oh yeah,

I am love.

It's such a good feeling to realize,

To feel that I am love,

And that love is all around,

And that it is okay to sometimes forget that I'm lovable,

That I forget that I'm love,

Because when I notice I now know what to do,

I will sit,

I will put my hands on my heart,

And I will allow myself to connect to all the love that is around me,

From Mother Earth,

From the people in my life that love me,

The people in my life that I love,

And then the way to my own heart is open,

And I can connect with that.

And the most beautiful thing is when I do,

I realize that there's so many more people who can also do this,

And that gives me such a sense of trust in,

That I'm on the right way,

That I'm here,

That I will spread my love,

And that I'm not the only one who is spreading love,

That there's so more and more people who are spreading their love,

Because they want to feel that love.

They want to feel that love is all around,

And you know what?

I'm going to trust that.

I'm going to trust that.

I'm going to trust that I am love.

I'm going to trust that I am uniquely me,

And very,

Very lovable and worthy,

And that by doing that,

By acknowledging that,

By finding that feeling again and again,

I will be a powerful force of love in this world,

Simply because now I know that I can do that,

Because I am love.

Now sit for a moment with this feeling.

It might be that you hear my words,

And you really resonate with it.

It might also be that you feel some resistance to my words here and there,

And that's okay.

That's okay.

That's also okay.

Be gentle with yourself.

You will get there.

Just repeat practice,

And it will be okay.

You're doing it exactly right.

Notice where you feel this connection with love in your body.

You might put your hands there for a moment,

So that when you come out of the meditation,

You can remind yourself where that feeling resides.

So you can support yourself next time when you want to go there.

Now imagine that you bring back all this love that you've been spreading back to your own body,

And you descend back into your body,

Feeling again your buttocks on the seat,

Or your back on the mattress if you're lying down,

Your feet on the ground.

And again,

Notice for a moment how if and how you feel different from when you started with this meditation.

Is there a stronger sense of grounding,

Or of a light heart,

Of love?

Maybe you have emotions that are now feeling free to be there.

And if those emotions are feeling unpleasant,

Then please be gentle with yourself.

Hug yourself,

Caress yourself.

It's everything is okay.

Everything is okay.

Every response that you have is yours to have,

And that is okay.

Be gentle with yourself.

You cannot do this wrong.

Now,

You can put your hands back in your lap.

Wiggle a little bit your fingers.

Wiggle your toes,

Your shoulders.

Just stretch your spine.

Maybe you need to yawn.

Maybe you want to stretch yourself.

Just feel again you here and now in your body present,

And if you're sleepy and you're lying down,

Then by all means,

Unless you have to go somewhere,

You could cancel that by the way.

Just close your eyes and take a nap.

All right.

But if you do have to go somewhere,

Or you're full with energy,

Then I invite you to take your time to slowly open your eyes,

But really take your time.

Make it pleasant for yourself,

And then I will be here to see if there are maybe some questions or experiences to share before we wrap it up for today.

Take your time,

Really.

No need to rush.

I'm here.

Not going yet.

Hi,

Dora.

Lovely that you're here.

No need.

But I had to go.

Hi,

Sandy.

Andres,

I like to contemplate and feel that sometimes connection and support of planet Earth,

Sun,

And the universe helps to open and expand the mind-heart sometimes.

Very lovely.

Thank you for sharing that,

Andresier.

I don't know how to pronounce your name.

Andresier.

I hope I say it right.

Sorry if I don't.

But let's go to what you're sharing,

And I think that's really,

Really lovely.

I'm very happy that you experienced that.

You're most welcome,

Richard,

My dear friend.

Jessa from Australia.

Did my first bushwalk.

Easy fire trail.

Flat was cool.

Recently split from love of my life.

So got me addressing my feelings.

I'm really happy that you start to address those feelings because that must be really hard for you.

But it's good that you're here and that you allowed yourself to feel that love is all around.

And there is a secret.

There's never one love of your life.

There can be more,

Really.

And they can be tremendous,

Great.

And compassing loves of your life.

Because you are a human being who is changing,

Who is growing,

Who is evolving,

Who is reflecting.

And sometimes one other person can be the love of your life for that whole process.

And sometimes there might be one more or two more or three more for every phase of that life.

So there are many loves of your life if you need that.

And that is okay.

Greg says,

Thank you so much.

Just before I flew to Italy,

I got some sad news about my best friend's health.

This felt so good to send and receive love from such a long distance.

Oh,

That's beautiful,

Greg.

And I hope your friend will do well and better soon.

Thank you so much.

Dora says,

Whoa,

I feel totally zonked out.

Thank you.

I feel calm and settled.

I'm happy to hear that,

Dora.

I'm so happy that you could join today.

Thank you so much.

All right.

Now,

Before I go,

Let me tell you about the next lives and the topics.

So the next one will be second Friday of March,

The 14th of March.

And that will be Self-Gentleness in Action 3,

Where we will have a topic procrastination.

And that is actually a topic that came from my group.

So on Insight Timer,

We have this meditation groups.

Mine is called Femke's Self-Gentleness Group.

There are now like,

I don't know,

530 people or something in it.

If you're not part of it,

I invite you to be part of that.

When there's something new,

I let you know there.

And I share my new meditation tracks there.

And I remind you of the lives I did today,

15 minutes before we started.

Normally,

I do it before.

But I also ask sometimes,

What would be topics that you would like to hear about in my life?

So procrastination is one of them.

And on the 11th of April,

Which is the birthday of my father,

Then we have as a topic,

Delicate decluttering.

That was also a question of someone who said,

I have so many things in my life.

And at a certain moment when I'm moving,

Or you get older,

You have to let go of things.

How can you do that in a self-gentle way without hurting,

Being hurt over all those memories when you start to release things?

So we'll speak about that.

On the 9th of May,

We will speak about when empathy defies self-gentleness.

That's a big one also for me.

So when you are an empath,

Or you're really empathic,

Or you really care of how others are feeling,

That might clash sometimes with you taking care of yourself,

You being gentle with yourself.

And we will speak about that,

How that is going.

So soon I'm going to plan also for June,

July,

August,

And till the end of the year.

So be part of that group there.

Let me know what topics you would like me to address.

And I will be happy if I think I can say something meaningful,

Of course.

I will be happy to address those.

Let me know,

I would love that.

For the rest,

I really would love you to support my work here on Insight Timer by listening to my tracks,

Reviewing them,

Giving stars,

Writing your review,

Share it with other people on Insight Timer.

There are also all kinds of buttons to put on your social media,

To share it with others.

If you have a premium account,

A premium subscription on Insight Timer,

Which I really recommend because it's not so much money and you get so much from all of us.

And,

You know,

It keeps Insight Timer alive.

It makes sure that Insight Timer can continue to be here to offer so many things for free,

Including these beautiful lives of all those teachers to people with those subscriptions of,

What is it?

I think in the Netherlands,

It's now 45 euro a year.

I think it's $60 in America a year,

Which is,

Which can be too much,

Then don't do it.

Be self-gentle.

But if you can spare that,

You could see it as an investment in your own happiness,

Your own mental health,

Your own resilience.

And you can listen to all those courses.

And that's my point because I have beautiful courses here on Insight Timer.

I have Start Being Self-Gentle Today.

I have How to Deal with Challenging Behaviors and Opinions,

Which is,

In essence,

About cultivating tolerance,

Specifically political and societal tolerance,

Which might come in handy in these polarized times.

I have a course,

How to Become an Authentic Leader,

Which is about leadership.

And it's,

You don't have to be a big leader,

Big CEO.

It can also be just the leader of your family,

Right?

Or the leader of your relationship.

It applies to anything you can do in your life where you are in need of taking a leadership role.

There is a course that is about picking your performance,

But with ease and without stress.

And then here's a course where you can explore eight different meditation techniques so that you can find one that fits you.

And this course can help you to start a meditation practice on your own.

So if you speak Dutch,

Then that other course is there.

The Self-Gentleness course is there.

And the Pick Your Performance course is also there in Dutch.

So that is a lot.

And of course,

You can donate if you like.

And if you heard everything and you have an iPhone and you know that Apple is then using this,

Then you can also go to Insight Timers website.

And I think you can donate there also,

Because then you go around Apple and then they will not take 30% of those donations,

Which I think is also not so fair from Apple.

But yeah,

I don't think Apple will listen to me.

Jill,

I'm so sorry to hear about your aunt who passed some new way.

I can imagine that you're missing her.

And I do not know if you were here in the beginning.

I have this free track,

Which is called When You're Missing Someone.

It's 17 minutes or something.

And I created it for myself many years ago when I was missing someone that was really important to me.

And it was so helpful.

And I get back from so many people that it can be really helpful in all cases when you're missing someone.

So also in your case,

Because it helps you to connect with the love that you have for that person and the love that person had for you.

And grief is a hard thing,

But also an important thing to live through.

But maybe this can help you to make it a little bit more light from time to time.

I wish you a lot of strength and I'm sending you all my love with that,

Dear Jill.

Dora says that these are such powerful,

Multi-faceted topics.

The sessions will be amazing.

Yeah,

I hope so,

So much.

Oh,

And thank you for the donation,

Richard and Glenn and Elizabeth.

Really,

Really greatly appreciate it.

Thank you so much.

Madeleine says,

I will look for the track.

Thank you.

And thank you,

Greg,

For your donation.

Thank you so much.

Yeah,

It's called when you're missing someone.

So if you go to my profile and inside timer,

You go to tracks and then you can select also on the timing and it's 17 minutes.

So if you look in that timeframe,

Then you will see it pretty quick because there's a lot out there.

But a lot of those are also recorded lives and those are generally one hour or something.

So you can take them away and then it's easier to find them.

Yes.

All right.

Thank you all so much for being here.

It was a real joy to meditate with you,

To feel love and connection between all of us,

To not just between all of us,

Actually between all beings and planet Earth.

And how wonderful is that?

Love is all around always.

Don't forget it.

Keep it in your heart.

And even when you don't feel it,

You will know somewhere because today you've experienced it.

And this experience is something that will stay with you,

Which will stick with you as it is supposed to be.

I really,

Truly hope to see you on the 14th of March for my next live.

If you want to know more about everything that I do,

Check out my profile,

Check out the link in my profile.

And I'm sending you all so much love.

Have a lovely weekend.

Be self-gentle,

My dear friends.

And see you in a month.

Bye-bye.