Today on Live Awake,
It's time to remember your trusting vantage.
In retrospect,
You see clearly what the journey of life is.
As if you are looking back through a clear glass.
In retrospect,
You will understand that your entire life was but choices made one after another.
In the name of love,
Or preserving that love.
Nothing will be wrong or broken.
Just choices made either way in the name of your heart.
Perched above your experience,
You will one day see each of your days woven together as a tapestry of missteps,
Hurtful choices,
Probing joy,
Heartbreak,
And redemption.
Love and the denial of that same love.
You will see it all as gathered choices and through those choices,
A melody will be woven,
Both sweet and achingly bittersweet.
Each time you choose something as you will that causes your heart to break in longing,
In seeming disrepair.
Each time you make a choice you think brought you farther from the love you long for.
Think again,
Dear one.
For each step,
Each movement and action will come together to create the beautiful paradox that is life.
We compound our suffering by looking too closely at the thing that is causing us pain.
We forget that soon a revelation will come from this very place.
But these painful spots and choices are often where growth comes to break us open into something larger,
Something more loving,
More purposeful in being and body.
If you have lost hope,
If you feel you have landed yourself in a landscape of ravaged earth and drought where you are sure your heart has left your chest,
Please just rest and hush now.
You have but try again.
Just choose again.
Choose anything but remaining complacent in your pain.
Choose anything other than running from your moments and yourself.
When we escape ourselves,
It is because we feel too ashamed,
Too broken to look in our own eyes,
Too disappointed with the unraveling of all we hold as dear.
We are so afraid of the thunder and lightning clapping at our heels that we keep running from ourselves.
When really the storm has come to wash us clean,
Come to quell the drought to feed our earth.
If you have been avoiding quiet moments,
These intimate moments with yourself,
You are avoiding the gift of life that is seeking to feed you.
You will find yourself and your heart again if you choose to turn toward yourself,
To land on your seat with your heart laid open.
Simply arrive and stop the running.
Watch each of your choices be still and calm.
Allow your heart to take residence within you once more.
Choose again as all your life is comprised.
One step forward,
One choice,
One after another after another.
Not one wrong.
Not one that is not in service of you.
Close your eyes now and lovingly arrive at your own feet.
Let your worries,
Your sorrow,
Your heartache,
Your dread,
Your shame,
Your loving spread out before you like a beautiful quilt.
Let weave into a blanket of warmth and love and symmetry.
Nothing you have chosen is wrong.
Nothing you have chosen does not fit into the fabric of your life.
Be still now here by your own mercy.
You are in the process of writing a concerto of divine compassion and love.
You are learning.
In all of your choosing you are learning.
You are remembering what you are.
Please hear me when I say there are no stains on the quilt of your life.
If you choose one next thing,
Choose to arrive here like you have now to give love to each part of you grown distant from your center.
This is the earth that will create movement and momentum in the direction of your heart.
Arriving here often will help you choose more of what will bring you joy,
Will help you love your journey.
Breathe in and breathe out.
Be washed clean of your worry.
It's time to remember dear one.
You were born to feel all of this.
Let go for one moment longer.
Waste no more of your time worrying something has gone wrong.
For in retrospect my love,
You will see through a clear glass the pieces that came together to make your heart beat wider than it could the breath before.
It's time to remember dear one that life is in your favor.
That you are in your favor.
Hush now,
Just choose again.
