Becoming Whole

A healing meditation that will help you integrate different aspects of yourself, and become a more whole and compassionate human being. Lou offers a supportive practice to bring light to the shadow-self and find greater understanding toward yourself and others. This meditation includes a short verse from The Prayer of St. Francis to deepen the insight and healing.

Transcript

Today I wanted to talk about something inspired by something I'm going through right now,

But I'll preface by saying that I think a big part of what meditation helps us to do,

But it's really more about our own personal growth and our own development,

Is to integrate these different parts of ourselves.

To see that as humans,

That we weren't born enlightened and in perfect happiness and bliss,

And just always happy,

Always showing kindness,

We're not like that.

We're human and we're in this human experience to have this duality of experience,

To see that sometimes we aren't always at our best.

Sometimes we do have anger and these kind of negative emotions,

Judgments,

Critiques of other people,

Righteousness,

These things show up.

And so part of our path is to see that it is not that's bad and this is good,

It's to see it all as part of a whole.

And what we're doing in meditation is how do I bring more light into those parts of us that are maybe running the show behind the scenes that are actually doing my life not so much good?

Or how can we show compassion and understanding to ourselves in those moments where we do act in a way that maybe isn't to our highest potential,

Isn't to our highest good?

Because I think that's our,

We have good intentions,

Right?

Where you show up to meditate and to be better people,

But there's these different dynamics in our life.

And something that's really helped me in understanding myself and also understanding myself in relation to other people is something called,

Some of you might be familiar with it,

But it's understanding typology,

Specifically based on Carl Jung's theory of introversion,

Extroversion,

And more deeper in the Myers-Briggs,

Which I'm sure some of you might have some familiarity with.

And you might know,

You might've taken a test before where you know your four letters or whatever that is,

But I've been researching this more the past three months and then the past two weeks,

I've actually been going deep on a course with a good friend who's like an expert at this stuff,

And we're going through a six week course on typology,

Understanding our type and understanding the nuances of how we relate to others and how others are just fundamentally seeing the world from different lenses,

That different things are important to them that necessarily aren't important to me.

And what this has helped me to do,

Especially in my significant relationship,

Is in the moments where I'm already thinking of so many things that just by based on our two different dominant functions,

That I would want to judge or critique her for purchases or things that she's doing or things that she's made based on my personality.

And I'm realizing through this and shining light that she's approaching the world a little differently,

Something that actually brings a lot of strengths to me and to my life.

And so this has helped me in my relationship.

And it's also helped me to let go of,

I think,

Especially now when we're maybe like in this kind of space of we've been in quarantine for a long time,

Maybe we've been with the same people for a while,

Maybe things are getting on edge,

Maybe we're looking at the news and starting to create more judgments or critiques of things or people that are going on.

And so it's also helped me to try and have more understanding,

Not only that I don't know the background of other people,

But also that other people were all a little bit,

You know,

Different.

We all,

But at the same time,

We're working to,

We're all one.

It's this paradox of like,

We're all of the same essence.

I like to think of it like a car,

You have the engine of the car,

Which the engine likes to be on the inside,

Like to kind of run the show from the inside.

And then the tires of the car like to be on the outside,

Like to be on the ground,

Like to be feeling the air.

Both are necessary,

Right?

We need both people,

Both parts of that car.

We want to look at a car and say,

Hey,

Look,

That's an engine and tires and mirrors.

You would just say that's a car.

And so we have these different elements,

But we're actually also this just one common unifying element.

And so with all that today,

We're going to work with some of our own spectrum of good and bad in the sense of trying to integrate these two parts of ourselves to become more whole to shine light on things that maybe we don't like to look at always,

But also to acknowledge and appreciate some of the awesome qualities of ourselves.

And to do that,

I have done this in a few times in other meditations in the past if you've practiced with me,

But I really am a big,

I love the prayer of St.

Francis because in so many different ways I love it.

But the one part that I love that we're going to share today is this,

May I grant to not seek to be consoled as to console,

To be understood as to understand,

To be loved as to love because it's in giving that we receive.

So it's in giving,

It's in understanding that we're actually,

We're letting go of those negative feelings that we're harboring and coming into that place of wholeness.

And so go ahead and let's move into our sitting practice.

And close down your eyes and begin to allow your body to slow down.

We're actually going to start this week by creating a little energy using our breath.

And so intentionally moving our breath to settle us and slow us down.

And so I'd like you to inhale through your nose for one,

Two,

Three,

Four.

Hold two,

Three,

Four.

Exhale two,

Three,

Four.

Hold out two,

Three,

Four.

Again inhale two,

Three,

Four.

Hold two,

Three,

Four.

Hold out two,

Three,

Four.

Hold out two,

Three,

Four.

Go ahead and just do one more on your own.

Whenever you find completion in that,

See if you can connect right away to wherever your breath wants to find itself.

So just feeling the natural rhythm of your breath.

Maybe noting if intentionally moving your breath shifted anything,

Noting if it didn't.

Continuing to allow your legs to fall heavy,

Allowing the body to come into that support and that sense of being held by the ground or the cushion beneath you.

And with that foundation still finding an alertness through your upper body,

Still maybe finding a little length to the side body through the sides of the neck.

Allowing all the shoulders to fall down the back.

Using this rhythm of our breath,

We're going to do a very short body scan to relax and release any tension in our body and also to note these different parts of our body.

Just as we're working to integrating the different parts of our emotional experience,

We're seeing different parts of our body all unified and working together in one.

And so starting at the crown of your head and if it feels or if it works for you almost like imagining this wave of relaxation starting to move down your forehead,

Your eyes,

Your cheek,

Down the front and sides of your neck to the shoulders,

Your biceps,

Triceps,

Down to your arms,

Your hands.

When you do that even allow your hands to fall a little bit more rested wherever they're at either on your thighs or by your side.

And then coming back up through your chest,

Down your ribs,

Navel,

Through your hips,

Your thighs,

Knees,

Calves,

All the way down to the foundation of your feet.

And then imagining all these parts of your body now switching that to just seeing your body as a whole,

Feeling your body as a whole and shifting the awareness of our breath to imagining that the whole body was breathing in and the whole body is breathing out.

And so it's as if every pore of your body was breathing in and every pore of your body were breathing out.

And before we move into further in this practice we're going to focus ourselves,

Focus our attention by bringing our awareness into the mind's eyes,

The space between your eyebrows and using this unifying word of one to repeat and to further allow us to center.

And so just gently repeating to yourself one,

One,

One and using that word as your anchor here for a few moments.

And then letting that go and together let's all take another full conscious breath in and out.

So seeing if we can keep that focus and that sense of groundedness throughout this practice even as we start to work with these different parts of ourselves and how that relates to maybe others that show up in our life.

And to begin we're going to use the few lines of this prayer to set the intention for us to seek to understand,

For us to seek to show love rather than to need it come from outside.

And so just imagining maybe listening to these words,

Seeing how they resonate and maybe repeating them or maybe just listening as I go ahead and say them.

I hope that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console,

To be understood as to understand,

To be loved as to love,

It is in giving that we receive and it is in pardoning that we are pardoned.

And so before we can start to understand others let's work to really understand these different parts of ourselves and show love to ourselves.

And so I'd like you to first bring to mind something that allows you to be at your best.

Maybe you imagine a situation when you are your best self.

And so noticing where this is at,

Is this at work,

Is it at home,

Is it in a relationship.

Maybe go into this experience and see what are those qualities that you admire about yourself.

And even if you're like,

Oh there's no part,

There's no parts that I can find,

There's something.

Something that makes you say,

Man yeah I'm awesome.

I can be really awesome at some times.

And see yourself there exuding this beautiful nature of your best self.

And I'd like you to share with them,

Just two lines,

I see you,

I love you.

I see you,

I love you.

And repeat both or maybe one of those just for a few moments,

Appreciating,

Admiring yourself when you are at your best.

And then you're going to let that go.

And with kindness,

With compassion,

We're going to bring a situation that's more in the other direction.

And so thinking about times where you're not at your best.

Where you do things that maybe you regret or you act in ways that don't typically feel like your best self.

And when does this happen?

Maybe it's when you're in high levels of stress or uncertainty.

When someone triggers you.

Again,

Holding this with kindness,

Not saying that this is necessarily a bad part of ourselves just because we may not want to act like it all the way,

But it's these different parts that we're working to integrate.

This was the parts that make us whole.

And so see this part of you,

Maybe you see yourself in this situation.

And we're just going to add a few lines to the understanding that we show.

And looking at this version of you who's maybe a little bit more insecure or scared and sharing with them.

It's okay.

You're human.

I see you.

I love you.

It's okay.

You're human.

I see you.

And I still love you.

And repeat whichever ones of those or maybe anything else that feels like you're sending understanding to maybe a darker side of you and sending that person that same love.

And then I'd like you to let that go and see almost in front of you both of those people meeting your best self and your maybe worse self or your not so best self.

And have them look at each other and see them shaking hands.

Not to say that we're accepting our bad behavior,

But bringing more consciousness to it,

Bringing more integration as we said.

I'd like you to go all over to these two people,

These two versions of you and give them a hug almost like you're all embracing in this circle.

Kind of huddling up and repeating these words as a whole,

As a unit.

May we be whole.

May we be loved.

May we be whole.

May we be loved.

May I be whole.

May I be loved.

Repeating that for another few moments.

Unifying the dark and the light.

Exposing your whole self.

And then letting that go and together let's all take another full breath in.

And a full breath out.

We're going to move this now to working with some other people that may be in our lives.

I'd like you to bring to mind someone whom you love dearly.

Your partner,

Your child,

Someone that you deeply care about.

Although you love this person,

Sometimes you may see things differently.

May not get along always.

So maybe thinking about when does that come out?

When does some negative energy or some negative feelings start to come out in this relationship?

Maybe that person does something that can trigger you in a certain way.

And we're not trying to judge them here,

Again we're holding all of this with just more understanding.

And as you bring them to mind let's come back to that prayer again for a moment.

Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console.

To be understood as to understand.

To be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive and it is in pardoning that we are pardoned.

So holding this loved one in your awareness and almost like you're sharing this with them.

Sharing these words of finding mutual understanding and compassion.

May we find understanding.

May we find forgiveness.

May we be loved.

May we be whole.

May we be loved.

May we be whole.

And again stay here for a moment sending that understanding and those wishes towards and with this relationship in your life.

And then letting them go.

And this time bringing someone to mind whom you don't have a close relationship that maybe you don't know so well but you tend to judge harshly or harbor some sort of negative energies.

Maybe you don't want to do it but it maybe just comes up when you see certain things or certain people.

And so holding them and not needing to approve of anything but again seeking to understand.

And so holding them in your awareness and sharing with them or this group or whatever the situation might be.

It's okay that we're different.

We're human.

May we find understanding.

May we find forgiveness.

May we be loved.

May we be whole.

May we be loved.

May we be whole.

And noticing if that changed that relationship and it might it might not.

It doesn't have to.

And then letting that go.

And then lastly we're going to just bring to mind this whole world uniting as one.

All the people,

All the differences,

All the personalities and things that we're all into.

Seeing this one circle almost maybe like you're stepping out into the universe and looking down at this circle,

This unifying symbol of Earth.

And sharing these intentions as a collective with all of us here.

May we all be loved.

May we all be understood.

May we all be whole.

We are loved.

We are whole.

We are one.

Lastly just the words.

Loved.

Whole.

One.

Ending just how we moved into this.

Maybe finding that repetition,

That focus of one.

One.

One.

For one.

.

And then slowly beginning to come back to your seat,

Back to that connection.

When you feel complete,

Go ahead and open your eyes and come back into your room.

Feel free to take any movements that call to you.

So remember,

It's in giving we receive.

So by giving ourselves,

Doing that work,

It is working on a different level that we don't see.

And these energies,

They might not come back to us right away,

But it might come back in just being in that situation again,

And all of a sudden realize,

Huh,

Wow,

I don't have that.

Something feels different.

Something feels a little lighter.

And that's,

I think,

In essence,

That we're looking to lighten ourselves and get out of this density of these heavy emotions that hold us,

That is the work.

Without them,

We wouldn't be able to do this work.

And so I thank you for showing up and for doing the work with me.

I saw some friends,

I think,

On here.

So please feel free to invite your friends during this time of isolation.

These meditations are what I see my gift to the world.

So I would love as many people to join as would find support in them.

So I thank you for continuing to show up and as always let me know if you have any questions.

Much love.

Namaste.

Reviews

Thank you for your gift to the world! 😊🙏 I love your meditations and this one specifically inspired me regarding the autobiography I’m writing. So thank you! I will definitely share this to my friends. Just curious, what’s your Myers and Briggs type?

A masterpiece! Whole, Loved, One, a mantra to all who walk this earth. Thank you Lou for reminding me to continually have compassion for myself and others in how we speak act and show up in the world.

Great meditation and talk to return to again and again. I enjoy how Lou integrates personal experiences, making his practice relatable to every day life. The guided imagery makes the meditation and practice memorable throughout the day so that they can be internalized and part of daily living.

Thanks Lou for always helping me to find a way through. Namaste 🙏

Outstanding as always.

thanks, a wonderful and calming learning experience!

Thanks for this meditation and guidance!

Right on point, as always Lou. Hope you and those you love have been healthy and well. Thank you dear. Namaste 🕉☮️🕊

A really interesting way to approach these different 'aspects' of ourselves when they arise, and the visualisations were really helpful. Thanks Lou!