When Life Knocks You To Your Knees - How To Get Up

When life knocks you down and everything feels heavy, this 30-minute meditation offers a way back to your center. Through gentle guidance and body-based awareness, you'll release tension, reconnect with your inner strength, and rise into the calm presence of your higher self. Let this be your reset—an invitation to remember who you truly are, even in the midst of chaos.

Transcript

Hi there and welcome.

This is Ed.

And welcome to this talk slash meditation on when life knocks you down,

How do you regain yourself?

How do you get back up on your feet?

It's such an important kind of facility to have these days with all the uncertainty that's going around politically,

Financially,

Emotionally.

So I think it's a great topic.

So let's go into it a little bit,

Okay?

Great.

You know,

One of the things that knocks us to our knees is when something keeps not going our way,

Or something,

Or many things happen to us,

Or an important thing happens to us that's just not what we expected.

And there are two basic sources from this kind of sort of emotional knockout,

So to speak.

And one comes from a trigger for a deep wound.

If someone or something or an event triggers a wound that's waiting for us,

A wound that has happened a long time ago that we haven't healed,

And if it's a very powerful trigger and a potent wound,

Then it could knock us out right away.

It could really knock the wind out of our emotional lungs,

So to speak.

The other thing that can happen is that in a day,

Or a series of days,

Or a period of time,

Things just keep going wrong.

Things happen that we don't expect.

Losing a job,

Having a fight with your significant other,

It could be many things,

But they're mostly things that are out of our control,

Out of our control.

And although there may not be just one trigger that really takes a hold of us,

When things don't go our way in a consistent or in a persistent manner,

We start to lose confidence in what we're doing,

In whatever that activity may be,

Whether it's people giving us attention,

Or our lover focusing their attention on us,

Or the way we're treated at work,

Or we lose something that's of value to us.

It could be anything.

What happens there is,

Rather than it being a trigger,

Which happens immediately,

Almost unconsciously,

There's a series of thoughts that go on in our mind,

Like,

Why is this happening to me?

Why did that happen to me yesterday,

And now this is happening to me today?

There's a sense of being out of control.

And most of us,

Probably all of us,

Only maybe some people don't want to admit it,

We all have sort of a shadow side,

Don't we?

You know,

A negative voice that goes on in our head,

Again,

Based by old wounds,

Childhood wounds,

Experiences as a young adult.

And I like to call that part of us the shadow.

And what the shadow does is it tells us about what we're doing wrong.

It's sort of like a critic.

It's more like a sub-personality within our mind that makes us feel weak,

That creates a sense of insecurity,

Right?

So when something goes wrong,

This voice comes in and says,

It's your fault.

It's your inability to do this,

Or it's your inability to be smart enough,

Or pretty enough,

Or witty enough.

That self,

That ego part of us that holds that insecurity,

Peace,

Nags at us.

And when that nagging continues over a period of time,

We just become overwhelmed.

So with a trigger,

It could be instantly.

With the shadow and the sense of insecurity or not being good enough,

Which most of us get at one time or another when we're growing up,

Then it's that shadow,

And it's a slow wearing down over time,

Over circumstances.

Either way,

The one phenomenon that's happening in this situation is that we're forgetting who's talking.

One of my teachers would always say to me when I was going through stuff,

I'd say,

Hey,

Miguel,

This is happening to me,

And I feel like crap.

And he'd look at me,

He'd say,

Ed,

Who's talking right now?

And I'd say,

I am.

And he'd look at me,

Really?

Is it the real you?

Who is talking to you?

And I'd realize it was this shadow part of me,

Which is not the entirety of me,

Which is not the real me,

Which is not the whole me.

So when we believe that the thoughts that come in through the triggers or the shadow,

The insecurity thoughts,

We think it's us,

Then we've taken it personally,

And it's really hard to get free.

So one of the things that we need to do in any circumstance is begin to remember who's talking.

I might have created a situation,

But that's only a small part of me.

Get it?

Yeah.

Yeah.

And how we remember that we're not really or entirely this insecure personality within us,

This shadow,

We're not the cause of events that are outside of our control,

Is to,

One,

Do some kind of meditation,

Two,

Do some kind of breathing exercise,

Do something to get us into the perspective of the whole self that we are.

So even when we're really down on our knees,

Down and out,

Feeling the worst,

Feeling like there's nothing but a miracle could bring us back,

We have to realize that our true self is just inches away,

So to speak,

From what we're feeling right now.

It seems overshadowing,

Because we thought about it,

And we put all these incidents together and made a big case about why something didn't happen,

On whose fault it is,

When really,

Our true nature,

Which is positive and calm and collected and loving and affirming love to ourself,

Is really very close at hand.

And that's what we need to do.

But sometimes,

Because of habit,

When things get too much,

We can't see that far within us to get out of it.

It's a coping mechanism that we've done,

And we have to rewire the brain as to,

Oh,

I'm feeling this down and out-ness,

Now let me do something about it.

And that's what we're going to do in this meditation that's coming up.

So remembering to do something is really almost the whole game,

Because when our shadow or when our negativity pops up,

We can't remember,

We're in a survival mode,

We just want to cope with it,

Think our way out of it,

Or go please somebody,

Or do something to make it better,

Rather than see who we really are,

Which is much,

Much more than a mistake that we might have made,

Or an error in decision,

Or maybe we did something that wasn't so cool,

But it doesn't define us.

OK,

So you ready?

All right,

Then.

So let's sit.

Please find a place to sit down comfortably.

Feet on the floor is preferable,

But in a comfortable position so that your body is supported.

And close your eyes.

And take a nice deep breath,

Breathing in through your nose.

And out through your mouth or nose,

Whichever is better for you.

Yeah.

One more deep breath.

Now for the moment,

I'd like you just to put your attention on your breath.

As your breath calms down from deep breathing,

Just begin to become aware of how it feels to have the air move in through your nostrils,

Down your air passages,

And into your lungs,

Filling them.

It's a wonderful feeling to breathe,

To feel how wonderful it is.

You might even feel how the soothness of your diaphragm and your chest moving with the in-breath and the out-breath.

If thoughts come into your mind,

That's OK.

Don't fight them.

Just return to the awareness of your breath.

Again,

When we do this,

Our mind may be very active and want to grab our attention.

And that's OK.

Just like someone walking down the street with you,

You don't put your attention on the person next to you.

You just look ahead.

So you just keep your attention on your breath,

Even though your mind is wanting to fret or worry or think negatively.

And eventually,

Your breath will win out,

And you'll feel a little more calm,

A little more rested.

Good.

For those of you that are meditators,

This would be very familiar.

For those of you that are not,

No worries.

This is all a natural tendency of the mind and body.

When you sit down and close your eyes,

Your body naturally begins to relax.

The mind fights it,

But if you pay attention to the body,

Your body will relax.

Mm-hmm.

Good.

Become aware of your body in this quiet,

Quieter place,

This quieter frame of mind.

Become aware of your body.

Many people call this a body scan.

Feel what your body is feeling.

What are your toes feeling,

Your feet,

Your calves,

Your thighs,

Your groin,

Your back,

Your neck,

Arms,

Your shoulder?

Go through your entire body and see if there's some sensation,

Some heat,

Something going on somewhere in your body.

I'll give you a few minutes to do that.

It doesn't have to be a strong sensation.

It could be,

But it could be a very delicate sensation,

Heat tingling.

When you notice something,

Put your attention on it as if to say,

There you are,

Sensation,

I feel you.

And just know,

Trust me for this moment,

That that sensation is somehow connected to the thought that you're feeling that you can't let go of.

And just feel that sensation and say,

There you are.

And invite it to release.

Invite it to let go.

It's a very light intention.

And as you're feeling that area of the body,

You'll begin to feel the tingling increase or decrease.

It may increase a little bit to let go and then decrease.

Yeah.

It could move to a different part of the body,

In which case you just move with it,

Inviting it to release.

And as it begins to release,

Just take a sigh and know that you've just let go.

Of stress in your body.

And notice that the thought is not as powerful,

Overwhelming,

Intruding.

Go ahead and try it.

Now you may feel complete release of that tension in the body,

Or you may feel just a little.

It's technique.

And it takes time for you to learn a new technique and get good at it.

But even some relief is better.

Some returning back to norm.

Some feeling the calmness and getting back to yourself.

Not feeling out of control.

You've stopped the thoughts that are overwhelming your mind.

You've stopped the insecurity.

You've stopped those insecure thoughts.

Good.

And just know that your ability to do this right now is sort of a testimony to the power of your mind and body to heal itself.

Because deep within you is an enormous,

Abundant amount of creativity,

Energy,

Relaxation.

It's your inner nature which was God-given.

So every time we do this and recover,

We go,

Oh,

Thank you,

Great.

And we strengthen in our resolve that we can get up off our knees emotionally and get back into the world and get back into the game.

And know that we just misbelieve the voice in our head that was telling us a lie.

Because the truth is that how you're feeling right now is who you are.

Yes.

Yes.

And I'd like you to sort of repeat with me,

Not to say this out loud,

But let's,

And this isn't really an affirmation,

But it's actually a confirmation.

Because when you say this,

Feeling what you're feeling,

It's sort of a confirmation.

Okay.

Say that to yourself and feel it.

You're feeling calmer,

More expanded.

You say,

I am okay.

I can get to this state when I need to,

Anytime,

Almost anywhere.

I am okay.

And also remind yourself,

I am okay just the way I am in this moment.

I am okay with faults.

I am okay with deficiencies in doing things.

All of that does not take away from who I am,

Which is this feeling that you're feeling right now.

You're sort of etching this feeling into your muscle memory to remind yourself,

I am okay.

I am safe.

Yeah.

I'm safe and I can be safe through my own devices,

Assuming no one's attacking me.

I can close my eyes and come into this safe mode,

Safe being,

Returning to my normal stature,

Returning to my strength,

Returning to my calm,

Returning to my balance.

I am safe.

The world around me may be chaotic,

But if I don't interpret that chaos as being my personal experience,

I can stay safe,

Centered,

Sovereign in the middle of chaos.

Boy,

That's important these days,

Isn't it?

Then say,

I am empowered.

I'm empowered by my creator to heal,

To heal myself,

To calm myself.

Every night you go to sleep and you close your eyes.

And if you sleep well,

You'll wake up rested in the morning.

You didn't have to do anything to make yourself feel rested.

Your body healed itself.

It knows how to heal itself.

Yes.

And when you do these techniques,

These mindfulness techniques that I'm showing you,

This one in particular,

You know how to calm your nervous system in a challenging time.

So you know how to heal your mind if you recognize who's speaking and return to this place of who you are,

This calm,

Peacefulness.

I can bring myself to my center.

I am loved.

I'm loved by people.

Maybe not all the time,

But you are loved.

And you can love yourself.

I deserve love.

That's the thing to say.

I deserve love.

And I give myself love.

Doing this right now,

Getting onto this meditation was an act of love.

And you did that.

Waking up every morning,

Wishing yourself the best day,

Trying your hardest,

Is self-love.

So you do love yourself,

Regardless of what that voice may say to you.

I can enjoy the moment.

Yes.

I can forgive myself.

No one is perfect.

I can make mistakes.

But I can forgive myself.

Even if you forget to do this,

You'll eventually remember.

And what we do often that makes us feel better,

We get into a mental memory of doing it.

And that's part of loving ourself.

That's part of our biology,

Securing that we survive.

But most of all,

The deepest thing that we can do is connect with this inner self.

This connection makes us bigger than who we are.

When you can connect to a quiet,

Calmer part of you,

You grow inside.

You grow confidence,

Self-love,

Integrity.

And you have all these abilities.

We may not always choose them because we haven't been trained or created the habits to choose these.

But we can.

So we are blessed that we have these capabilities.

And that's what's so powerful.

We have these incredible capabilities.

And we're blessed to have them.

We didn't have to learn how to do them.

In school they teach us how to read and write,

Arithmetic.

But they don't teach us how to heal ourselves.

That's already waiting within us.

For us to wake up to these facilities.

Which is what this meditation is really all about.

So I am blessed.

And when you think about being blessed,

When you think about your facilities to calm and heal yourself,

You realize that even though you're not in control of the world,

You are in control of yourself.

As long as you can remember who's talking.

I am blessed.

I am in control.

I am loved.

And check in with your body.

How do you feel?

How does your mind feel?

Relaxed.

You've connected with your inner self.

And what you're feeling now is the result of inner connection.

And when you're totally there,

Open your eyes.

And imagine that when you open your eyes,

You'll see the world a little differently.

That you'll look around you in your room,

And you'll see the things that stimulate different things.

A picture of you and your love,

Your children.

And you'll say,

Oh look at that.

I love.

And there'll be a piece of you that will be watching that you love,

Knowing that you love.

And maybe you'll look over and you'll see something that reminds you of something that's a problem in your life.

But you'll look at it a little differently.

Like,

Oh there's the problem.

It's still there.

But there's this incredible resources within me to deal with it.

And you can see the world a lot different.

And although we're not in control of all the circumstances that come upon us,

We can be more secure and more independent that we don't lose.

We don't get knocked down on our knees by the world,

By a person,

By a thing,

Or a place,

Or a circumstance.

Okay?

Great job.

With that I'll leave you and say peace,

Love,

Practice this meditation often,

And it will reward you a hundredfold.