Welcome to observing and understanding our emotions.
Today we are going to practice noticing and understanding our emotions and what they are telling us.
First we'll learn a little bit more about how emotions work and then we'll observe our own present experience.
It can be helpful to remember that each emotion that we feel exists for a reason.
The anxiety,
The fear,
The sadness,
The anger,
They all bring us important and meaningful information about ourselves.
Emotions are like voices for the parts of us that would like to be heard.
They are there to help us hear these parts of us clearly and to learn more about what these parts of us might need or like for them to feel okay again.
If we listen closely they can point us toward the next step to take to meet important needs that we have,
Almost like a compass.
In that way our emotions can be so adaptive for us.
They help us in the moment,
In the face of danger.
Anxiety and fear wisely trigger our nervous system to gear up to protect us and to keep us safe.
Sadness steps in to remind us that we lost something that was important to us and that it would be helpful to take some time and space to care for our heart and to find some healing and restoration.
Anger is a strong and powerful reminder to communicate a new boundary because an important boundary was crossed.
We might also become aware of an emotion that appears because it once was very helpful for us in a situation that we experienced in our past,
But this emotion is not as helpful now in our present situation.
For example,
Maybe you might feel fearful toward a situation or within a relationship in your present because there were times in your life that fear was helpful or adaptive for you.
Maybe fear served an important purpose for you at that time and because it was able to help you then,
It wants to keep trying to help you in the same way that it once did.
It doesn't realize that this is a different situation or you don't need it in the same way that you once did.
However,
This fear still provides you with helpful information about how you felt then and it provides you with an opportunity to tap into how you feel now and what is helpful for you in this moment.
We have various layers of emotional experiences.
Our primary emotions reach all the way down to the core of us.
They reflect our deepest emotional experience and are strongly connected to our needs.
They might feel new or helpful when we experience them.
Sometimes our thoughts and behaviors stem from this place and sometimes we notice secondary emotions.
These emotions are often reactions that feel familiar.
They might come from certain thoughts or even from other emotions.
We might feel immediate anger towards someone but when we look even deeper,
We might find sadness or fear at our core.
Maybe we feel hurt.
Maybe reacting in anger feels safer or serves another kind of purpose.
Sometimes slowing down,
Pausing,
And observing can help us notice this emotion and provide us with a chance to explore whether there is something deeper that has further information for us.
Sometimes it can be difficult to find our emotional experiences and to identify them and figure out how we feel.
Our physical experiences and sensations are connected to our emotions.
These signs and clues developed to help us respond in a way that could be helpful for us.
If we are feeling anxious or scared,
We might notice sweaty palms,
A feeling of tightness in our chest,
Butterflies in our stomach,
Or maybe a quicker heartbeat.
If we are feeling sad,
We might notice our shoulders melting down and a sensation of heaviness in our arms and legs.
If we are feeling angry,
We might notice a narrowing in our eyes,
An increased heart rate,
Feeling hot in our face,
And a tightness or a clenching in our muscles and in our hands.
These clues might help us figure out how we feel,
That we feel angry.
If we are happy,
You might notice a sense of lightness and energy in our body.
Yet our muscles might feel relaxed.
Of course,
These signs and clues aren't identical for every person but they can sometimes give us an idea as to what we might be feeling inside.
We can learn to practice reading the clues that our body gives us to help us figure out what emotion we are feeling.
It's also important to note that sometimes it might not be a safe or comfortable time to explore an emotional experience.
Sometimes,
Tuning inward and exploring our emotional experiences is so very interesting and other times it might feel scary.
Emotions are like waves and we are like surfers.
When we feel an emotion or signs of an emotion in our body,
We can notice it and assess it.
How big is it?
How intense is it?
Do we feel like we can surf it today?
We might look at the wave and say,
Yes,
This feels a little bit nerve-wracking and I can surf this one.
This is an experience that I can tolerate.
Other times,
The wave might more closely resemble a tsunami and we feel overwhelmed just looking at it.
If we feel overwhelmed,
If it's too big for this moment,
That's okay.
We can choose to move beneath this wave.
We can choose to let it rise and fall above us as waves do.
We can feel our feet on the ground.
We can count to ten.
We can find an anchor by noticing our breath and taking deep breaths in and out.
If you begin to feel lost or overwhelmed at any point,
You can always find grounding,
An anchor in your breath.
Take a moment to establish an anchor for yourself,
Something that you can return to if you begin to feel lost or overwhelmed.
Now,
Let's shift gears a little bit.
As we begin this next part of our practice,
Let's take this moment to pause.
See if you can feel your feet or another part of your body solid and secure on the ground beneath you.
You may choose to close your eyes if this feels comfortable.
Let's take a deep breath together.
Deep inhale,
Long exhale.
As you breathe,
Take a moment to tune in to how you feel inside.
See if you can be curious about what you notice,
What you observe.
Just being aware of anything that comes up for you,
Anything that peeks into your awareness.
Breathe.
Perhaps you notice sensations within your physical body.
Just notice for a moment.
You might connect the physical sensations that you feel to an emotion flowing within.
Can you identify that emotion?
Notice if this is an emotional wave that you can surf or maybe not at this moment.
If not,
That's completely okay.
This is you listening to yourself and staying in tune.
See if you can find your anchor.
Pause and breathe,
Remembering how safe and secure you are in this moment,
Listening to my voice.
If you choose to surf this emotional wave,
Maybe you can stay with it for a moment.
Breathe.
Notice if it feels very familiar or maybe new.
Notice on your next breath.
See if you can peer a little bit deeper into this emotion.
Perhaps this is the deepest it goes or maybe there is something else under there.
You might just observe and be curious about the emotion that you find or the sensation that you feel.
Maybe this is a helpful emotion with new information for you or perhaps it's hard to tell.
Maybe you don't notice an emotion.
Maybe you find more than one.
Take a moment to breathe with whatever is there inside of you,
Noticing,
Being curious,
Gathering information,
Exploring and investigating.
Now,
As we begin to close this part of our practice,
If it feels comfortable,
You might place one hand or both hands over your heart.
Whatever you feel,
If there is an emotion that you notice,
Remember that this emotion is there for a reason.
You can feel it and you can hear it.
As you feel your hands resting over your heart,
Perhaps you can send gratitude and understanding to whatever you notice inside.
Maybe to any part of you that might benefit from a little extra loving kindness and care.
Let's breathe deeply together into the place that exists within us.
Deep inhale,
Long exhale.
Anytime you want to tune in or become curious about what is flowing inside of you,
You can find your anchor.
Breathe deeply and notice and observe any emotion that might emerge into your awareness.
I'm honored that you spent this time with me today and shared your practice with me.
I send you all of my warmest wishes as you take your next step into your day or evening today.
