Curiosity, A Side Effect Of Living Well

One of the side effects of growing emotionally and spiritually, is we should begin to see the curiosity of a child return to our hearts. Instead of being exhausted by life, we begin to find that life is a beautiful universe waiting to be explored. (Please note, this is a lecture, not a guided meditation.)

Transcript

Welcome to the Happiness Podcast.

I'm Dr.

Robert Puff.

I don't know about you,

But I find young children fascinating.

Their curiosity about the world is just breathtaking.

For young children,

The world is just a place to be explored,

And everything is new,

Often exciting.

The fears,

Apprehensions,

And exhaustions that we feel as we get older are something that young children have to develop.

They're not born with that.

For many people,

As they get older and they go through their day,

At the end of the day when they come home,

They just want to sit down,

Perhaps have something to drink,

And watch a mindless show so they can just relax and turn off the brain.

They're exhausted.

They're tired.

They have no interest in learning or exploring this world.

They basically just want to check out for a while,

Go to bed,

And then do it all over again.

I do think that's a lot of people's lives.

Well,

If this is the first time you've ever listened to this podcast,

Or you've listened to all the previous 200,

There is one thing that I think we're going to discover as we get on this path of happiness and finding peace in our lives,

And that is as we get better,

As we get healthier inside,

That childlike curiosity is going to come back.

A matter of fact,

I think it's a test in many ways,

Or a sign that we are on the right path,

That we are doing things to get better and improving our lives,

And it's working when we begin to have a curiosity about our world instead of shutting off our world and just wanting to crawl in our little hole and hide from the world.

When we get happier,

When we find the peace in our lives,

What happens is that childlike curiosity just begins to come out again,

And we start exploring our world.

It's beautiful.

It's wonderful.

And it's what we're going to explore today,

Because I do believe that if we stay on this journey of finding peace and happiness in our lives,

What we should see,

What we will see,

Is that childlike curiosity return,

And we'll find that the world is an amazing place to explore,

And we have lots of energy to do that exploring.

I have a cat named Monk.

I got him at a shelter about five or six years ago,

And I was told that he was very shy.

I didn't know why.

Perhaps he came from a bad background,

But clearly for him,

The world was a scary place.

Well,

When he came to my house,

He found a little cubby hole in one of my closets,

Went in there,

And stayed in there for two months.

He'd come out at night to eat and go to the bathroom,

But mostly he just stayed in there,

And when everyone was sleeping or the house was very quiet,

He would come out.

He loved it when I came by and petted him,

And he would just purr and purr,

But he wouldn't come out.

But then,

Very slowly,

Because he discovered that my home is a safe place,

He started coming out.

He started looking around.

He started being that curious cat again,

And now,

Though he's always shy when new people come by,

He's out and about and exploring the world and very curious about his environment and loves being out and getting lots of attention.

And it has been that way because he's in a safe environment.

In many ways,

We're like that.

We go through life,

And then scary things happen.

We have traumas along the way.

We have events that frighten us or that hurt us,

And we begin to find our place to hide.

It's not a physical place to hide,

More of a mental place to hide.

We begin to hide from the world,

And people really don't know us.

Often,

We don't even know ourselves,

And we find that place where it's very safe,

Often deep in the recesses of our mind,

And mostly,

We just hide from the world,

And there's no sense of curiosity because we're just in survival mode.

So every day becomes a challenge.

We're exhausted.

We come home,

And we just want to tune out from the world,

So we put on our television or we watch our favorite shows on our iPad or we get on our phone and just escape,

Perhaps playing a game for hours.

We just do things to shut the world out because we're exhausted.

It's our little cubbyhole that we have found to hide,

To hide from the world and just survive.

But I believe we're here far more than just to survive because even though I deeply know we have very challenging things that we have to face through life,

We can overcome them.

This is what this podcast is all about.

Life can be very challenging,

But we can find that peace and happiness no matter what.

It's really up to us.

It has three parts to it.

The first thing we have to do is make sure that we work through and heal from the traumas of the past.

We can.

We absolutely can.

I spent my entire life helping people improve their lives,

And I've never seen anything that we can't overcome through work.

The second thing is we need to surround ourselves with people that are now loving and kind towards us that are positive.

They're like us wanting to make the world and ourselves a better place.

And if we are forced to be with people that aren't positive,

Then we set up boundaries to make sure that they can't hurt us or in very limited ways.

But the third and most important thing is what are we doing with our lives?

What are the choices that we're making in our mind throughout the day?

What are we thinking about?

Are we being self-critical?

Are we hard on ourselves?

Are we judging others?

And are we exposing ourselves to things that are positive,

Not just friends,

But the shows that we watch,

The things that we spend time with?

Everything matters.

And when we learn to be content with what we have,

Still working towards things,

But when they don't work out,

We're okay.

And if we're waiting,

We realize today is all we have.

So we live well today.

We make choices that are good for today.

This whole podcast,

All the previous episodes are about how to make our lives better.

But today I want to talk about,

Okay,

If we're doing this,

If we're truly doing this,

What will we see?

I mean,

Of course we're going to feel better and we're going to feel more peace,

But I think there's one other thing we should look for that will be there if we're truly on the right path.

Because as humans,

We are able to deceive ourselves.

I mean,

Think of an extreme case like a heroin addict,

A beautiful woman who may be choosing to sleep with seven or eight men every day because of her life as a prostitute.

As long as she keeps taking that heroin,

She can think everything is fine,

When in reality it isn't.

Another person may have a very challenging job,

But they come home and have two bottles of wine every night.

Again,

As long as they have their wine,

They feel like everything is okay,

But we know it isn't.

So what is this side effect I'm talking about that we'll see if we are making good choices,

If we are finding that peace and happiness in our hearts?

What will we see?

Curiosity.

Remember how I started this podcast talking about young children and how they're so curious about the world?

Do you ever wonder why they stop,

Why we lose that ability?

Because most people do.

The last thing they want to do at the end of the day is learn something,

Is explore,

Use their mind.

Most people are exhausted,

Even though what they've done all day is very repetitive.

Most of our lives when we're at our work is very repetitive.

Even a medical doctor who had a lot of training for what he or she had to do,

When they actually do their job,

It's very repetitive.

I have several friends,

Many,

That are in the medical profession and they'll tell me that what they do is really the same thing all day long.

So the question is,

Could we begin to see a curiosity that we had when we were younger?

Could that come back?

I would argue that it's going to come back if we're truly doing this right,

If we're learning to live in the present moment,

Keeping our fears and desires at bay,

Because we learn to be content with the present moment and what is.

When we do this,

When we really have reached a state of life is good,

What we should see,

What I would argue we will see,

Is a curiosity,

A desire to explore the world.

Mind you,

It can look very different to people,

But it's really ultimately the same.

It's a curiosity to explore our world.

It may mean that we take up piano lessons.

It may mean that we start drawing.

It may mean that we start writing a book.

It may mean that we start coming home at the end of the day instead of watching mindless television.

We watch documentaries about so many different things.

It may mean now that instead of never reading a book,

We're reading a book once a month.

It may mean that on the weekends,

Instead of just vegetating all weekend long,

We go to museums,

We go to lectures,

We get out in nature and explore.

It's really looking for that childlike curiosity that we see in children that perhaps we remember in ourselves that,

I believe,

Will be an effect of truly living well.

And if we're not feeling that,

If we're not feeling that curiosity about our world and our universe,

Then we need to ask ourselves,

Am I perhaps fooling myself?

Am I perhaps not doing this right?

And if so,

What changes do I need?

Again,

There are many episodes to learn about the changes.

Today I'm just talking about the side effect,

The side effect of curiosity.

It's a beautiful one,

One that makes our world truly delicious.

But we have to be really stellar in our hearts,

Clean,

Pristine,

Healthy,

In the present moment,

Without fears,

Without desires.

It's very challenging,

But if we get there,

What happens is the world becomes an amazing place to explore,

Truly.

I love to learn.

And I would describe myself as voracious,

Just a deep loving to explore so many different aspects of our universe.

And there's so many different ways of doing that,

From books to lectures to talks to just getting out there and touching things,

Exploring,

Sometimes even a literal exploring.

We start going on vacations,

Seeing the world,

Reducing our expenses so that we have the money to see our world and do more.

It has to do with priorities.

We make time for our love,

Our passion,

For our curiosity.

So instead of dreaming about buying this new thing or that new gadget,

We dream about exploring this aspect of the world.

And how do we make time for that?

Because the world just becomes pure fascination.

And that's what we're looking for.

If we're truly doing this right,

We will discover a deep,

Beautiful curiosity about our world.

And if it's not there,

We should ask ourselves,

What's going on?

What am I struggling with right now that's keeping me living to my fullest?

In many ways,

Curiosity about our world can be a very good test,

A very good way to see how are our hearts doing.

If they're doing well,

We are going to be curious.

We're going to be just voracious about learning and exploring and seeing so many aspects of our universe.

So let's ask ourselves periodically,

Am I curious or am I coming home and just wanting to numb myself after a long day?

And if we do,

Then say,

Okay,

I'm committed to making changes until I see that curiosity that's always there,

Returning to my heart,

And that I find that I too am living a beautiful life.

Thank you for joining me on the Happiness Podcast.

If you are finding these episodes helpful,

I would love for you to share your experience with others.

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And until next time,

Accept what is,

Love what is.

Reviews

Great advice, be curious and learn!

Excellent talk!

Enjoyed that. He brought up some great points that I had never thought of. Thank you 😊

Always insightful ideas. Thank you!

A great reminder to the path to increasing happiness within. Thank you.

Don't feel like curiosity is enough. I'm very curious & yet still have issues w addiction that keep me from being proactive in my own life

Another wonderful podcast. I really enjoyed this. Thank you 😊

Great chat on actively seeking and being excited about life and it’s joys.
Great ideas and good insight on how to change our mental paradigm.
Thank you 🙏🏽

Dr. Puff’s voice and enthusiasm always makes me smile. He sounds like he could be a ‘best friend’!

Thank you for a very helpful podcast you showed how important it is to be mindful and how we may not be able to control the outside world but we can take control of our selves and work on being mindful

Inspiring! Curiosity, non-judging, a quality of mindfulness, a way to add pizzazz to life! Thanks for the good ideas!