This is a meditation on who am I.
Not who you've told you are.
Not who you think you should be.
But who are you?
Really?
Try to set aside a pocket of time to be really with this question.
We'll keep it simple.
I am blank.
Fill in the blank with the first word or words that come to mind.
Keep it light and see what happens.
I am human.
I am alive.
I am breathing.
I am tired.
I am a woman.
I am a man.
First thoughts and let them come up freely.
If you stay in this space with ease,
You'll find that an identity that you don't expect to see pops up.
Like,
I'm selfish.
I'm needy.
I'm needy.
I self-destruct.
When that happens,
Don't push.
Don't resist it.
Don't judge.
Don't retaliate and react.
Don't run.
Just sit with it for a second.
Like it's a friend you could be curious about but you're not quite sure of yet.
Are you really?
Are you selfish?
Do you really self-destruct?
Are you needy?
Or are you maybe beginning to expect more out of life than you've ever dared to want or ever dared to be willing to dream of for yourself and for the people around you?
From those terms,
They've named it selfish because you may or may not have examples of what it means to live that untethered,
That infinite,
That secure in your sacredness.
We all hold thoughts on who we are underneath the surface,
But they don't necessarily belong to us.
They're not necessarily ours.
They can be stories that we've played on and played out and records we've repeated and we've taken them on as ours,
But are they really?
What is the truth of you?
If you love yourself right where you are with who you are,
Even when it's murky and sticky and unsure and vague and opaque and distracted,
What if you love yourself right there?
Your highest self,
Your infinitely loving self,
Your sacred self,
That self would never speak to you in a way that hurts.
That self would never speak to you in a way that made you feel small.
That self would encourage your reclamation and your liberation.
Your highest self holds you in the arms of gentle kindness and love and sweetness.
Your highest self pulls the chair out for you and says,
Here,
Loved one,
Put your feet up.
Let me anoint you.
I'm so very thankful you are here.
I cannot wait to cherish every aspect of who you are.
You showing up for yourself,
Even in this moment,
Is the evidence of that kindness.
So when you have moments like these,
When you can be still and silent and allow yourself to be filled with presence as yourself,
As your true infinite self,
Visit again and again and again to I am blank.
You get to rewrite the stories you tell about yourself.
You get to rewrite the depictions and fabrications of what you've been told of who you should be.
You get to take the records off the player that are not yours.
And you get to move in a loving manner.
You get to recalibrate.
You get to dance joylessly in your sacredness.
You deserve that.
You are that.
You are nothing less than.
