Learning to Swim Where 6 Rivers Meet

Our lives are a tumult at the meeting of the six senses. How do we swim in these waters with skill and grace? We hope you find this talk insightful. Please note it has been recorded live.

Transcript

Michelle and I just came to town this weekend just as we were taking a walk stopped by the Historical Society here in town and heard a story about a long time ago that there was a person traveling on this side of the river a seeker,

A wanderer someone going to the cities and to the villages trying to learn all that he could about the learnings,

The knowledge of people in this area and was returning back across the river and had to hire a ferryman to bring him across and so he finds someone not too far away to bring him across the river and as they start to go this philosopher asks the ferryman friend,

Have you ever studied philosophy?

And the ferryman says no,

I never have and the philosopher says,

What a pity you've wasted nearly half your life and he keeps paddling and he says,

Well tell me friend,

Have you ever studied mathematics?

And the ferryman says,

No I never have I never had the opportunity and he says,

Oh,

You've wasted more than half of your life and they keep going across and somewhere in the middle they find themselves in some very tricky currents and then this sort of storm comes up out of nowhere and actually capsizes the boat and knocks them over and they fall into the water and the ferryman sees the philosopher going downstream and he says,

Friend,

Did you ever learn to swim?

And he said,

No,

I never have he said,

Oh,

You've wasted all your life that's actually a story from far away but I always think of it when I'm at the river here and that sense of what I appreciate besides the dark humor of it is just that recognition about some way that society can train us in all of these ways around the intellect and around skills and all kinds of actual really beautiful and important things in our lives but not cultivate this training of our basic facility to use that metaphor,

The stream of life the stream of existence of not training us in the tools and the capacity to actually manage these wild currents that we find ourselves in and if you look even here at where the Matawaska River meets the Ottawa River it's a very turbulent area you see the wildness of the currents there there are warning signs and you're not allowed to swim that we have this version of that in our own experience where the Buddha would talk about it as the meeting of these five rivers six rivers the seeing,

Smelling,

Hearing,

Tasting,

Touching,

And the mind these currents of sense experience always flowing and so you can see what it's like when just two of them meet that we're in this sort of tumult of the meeting of all of these currents in the present moment and not only do we not know how to swim in each one of them on their own but when they come together there's just this energy,

This intensity,

This wildness to it that is very hard to navigate even for people who have had lots of training and so sometimes a metaphor like that can help us appreciate why this process is challenging what about it is so difficult because sometimes if you step back and you imagine someone who doesn't do this practice watching us that in its own would be interesting in the course but then also how we talk about it oh my god it was so intense this happened,

I had a really hard day I had a really incredible day and you'd be like nothing happened you're watching it it wouldn't make any sense and then when you sit here and you're not doing anything and just this stuff keeps unfolding and unraveling and we're just trying to keep our head above water and make it through of course it's not always like that level of intensity but there are times where it is and to appreciate,

Yeah,

This reality is actually very intense it's unfolding at this incredible speed at this incredible current of phenomena flooding by and of course that's challenging it's challenging for a number of reasons the Buddha spoke about three kinds of dukkha suffering,

Hardship one is the being joined with the unpleasant so this idea that in this stream of experiences where we are this current of formations that are always unfolding in the moment there are going to be unpleasant sensations that we are joined with and that we don't have control over that being joined with the unpleasant is difficult so that's an unpleasant sound an unpleasant,

You know,

Hip stubbing our toe we take the sort of small versions of it here of course in our lives and even here in our hearts we can be joined with very unpleasant mental phenomena very unpleasant experiences in the heart and mind so that's this one aspect of it and that it's out of our control there are going to be unpleasant phenomena that we are joined with the second is the separation from pleasant phenomena so also of course pleasant phenomena arise out of our control but they also vanish,

They dissipate we can't maintain them,

We can't keep them up and so this other aspect of the stream of experience that's challenging you know,

The heart grasps on to pleasant formations seeks to,

You know,

Hold on to them and they dissipate and there's pain in that the pain of impermanence and then finally this aspect of dukkha,

Of suffering,

Of hardship that's called sankaradukkha and it's just,

It's not about pain or pleasure but it's just,

It's the relentlessness of experience that exhausts us,

Right so even if it was just pleasant experience there's something tiring about it,

Right there's something exhausting and overwhelming at times it's just like,

It doesn't stop you know,

It just keeps coming,

It just keeps coming and so there's this kind of weariness that we can feel at times in our lives here in more intensive practice spaces it's so important to recognize that aspect of the suffering because it's not always so clear you can't always put such a clear name on it like,

Oh this bad thing happened or this thing that I love passed away,

Right it's like,

This,

The weariness of the relentlessness of the formations of the stream unending seemingly unending is part of that hardship part of that,

That we can experience in life,

Of course sometimes we don't know why we have this sense of weariness but certainly on retreat we can have that sense of just like oh my gosh,

You keep showing up for it and it keeps showing up,

You know it's just like,

There's no,

It doesn't stop and then sometimes you're even trying to sleep and you're mindful in your sleep you know,

It's like,

Oh no,

You know you don't even get that,

You have these dreams and you're just aware of what's happening it's like,

Oh god,

It's powerful,

You know and then sometimes you just,

You know you want to just shut it off you just want it to turn off,

You know and of course we do have our ways of trying to manage the intensity over our days here and I'll talk more about some of the different ways but one of the most important and kind of traditional ways is to consider like this river,

They have these locks,

Right they're using that Madawaska to generate power and so that they manage the intensity of the flow now,

You know,

The metaphor will start to get too complicated,

Right we think too much about it but the point is,

Is that we there are ways that we can be careful about this stream of sense experience and protective of our heart in this that are important to consider and to experiment with and to try a few weeks ago,

We were teaching at a very remote place in northern New Mexico that's incredibly beautiful really a wonderful place it also happens to have the wildness is not just in the outdoors the place where I sleep is very permeable to the wild in certain ways and in one particular way and it's always been like this we've been teaching there for a few years now but this year was really bad where at night I would finally settle you finally get to sleep start to relax and I hear this and there were just mice all over the place in this house this little cottage,

This cabin and it was like I know some people are going to sleep through that it's not my thing it's like these little beings running around,

Scurrying around and coming on they didn't come on my bed but I had noticed their evidence on my bed when I'd come in the morning or something like that so it's like I went and grabbed a roll of aluminum foil I just had it there and then when I'd hear one I'd turn on my flashlight and watch it and it would see me we'd have our little oh my god and run into its little hole,

So then I'd stuff that hole with aluminum foil because they can't they really don't like that and so then I'd be like ok,

Go back to sleep and then I'd be like rusting around again scratching,

Scratching,

And then I'd catch another one I'd see another one and I'd see it went into a different hole and stuff that hole and this one and then finally at some point I really had plugged up all the holes in my room,

Of course there was another part of the building there that I wasn't concerned about at that point and finally it was like there was this sense of protection in those places,

That these beings weren't going to be coming through and it stayed quiet long enough that I actually was able to relax and rest and go to sleep and before I fell asleep I was reminded it was like a metaphor that the Buddha uses a lot about sense restraint and relating to like Michelle had said these sensitivities are like holes,

Right the eyes and the ears,

The nose the mouth,

The body and the mind,

Right these entry points for experience coming through and that the Buddha really encouraged a kind of guarding of those sense doors an understanding that there was a value to a kind of sense of restraint of mental behavior toward what's happening in those sense experiences because it's so overwhelming because it's flooding so quickly because we are not trained to be able to be mindful of the pleasant mindful of the unpleasant mindful of the neutral,

Mindful of this flood of experience,

That there's a value in that sense of like being,

In one way that this works is around kind of just this concentration that we're bringing the attention to one object for a while and to some degree where we are prioritizing that place for our attention and we can see that there is a value in that,

We're offering a method in which that is not an exclusive concentration something calls the attention at the ears,

Some visual impression a mental experience that really draws the attention,

Okay,

Yeah,

We check it out we go see it,

We watch that arise and pass and we come back to the anchor that this kind of fundamental piece of the training is related to this quality of sense restraint and how important actually it is and what a life saver it is in terms of creating some degree of these sort of calm,

Relaxed conditions because if we don't have any restraint with it there's no relaxation,

The system can't settle down,

There's like,

You know,

We're having to kind of deal with all these little things coming in,

Each sense store,

You know,

And all these visitations,

You know and there are times where the mind might be so quiet and concentrated and mindful that it doesn't need to have so much restraint right,

Where it can notice a sound you notice a thought notice a sensation in the knee notice a thought notice an emotion,

Notice,

Like it's like when the mind is quiet and calm and strong there doesn't need to be as much control,

As much restraint but when we're feeling inundated when it is overwhelming when the mental,

The factors that support our calm concentration our capacity to show up aren't there,

That it's so important to do that and we can look at our of course in our daily lives this is a huge tool that could be so helpful and we can start part of the way we do it is starting to be sensitive to the craziness of always being drawn toward experience,

You know always being drawn toward the pleasant always,

Even being compelled to the unpleasant you know,

The way that we might be checking our email or checking the news or you know,

This sense of like kind of compulsion around even unpleasant sense of experience because it's a paradox that we're still actually addicted to so much of this things that make us angry or upset or stressed because that's like the structure of our inner self and it feels familiar right,

It still makes us feel solid because it's what we're anxious about,

Makes us feel like us you know,

And so these ways in which like,

Where do we build in some aspect of sense restraint right,

Of carefulness about where do we let the mind just kind of constantly wander to and when do we have some very gentle careful wisdom motivated restraint with that we can practice we're doing that already on retreat right,

It's like the sense of not speaking,

You know,

With one another that's a very powerful sense restraint not reading not taking in the you know,

Just news and information and relationships of the world around us right,

This seclusion that we have invited and that we've committed to,

It's a very powerful container and you can see the results you can see,

Wow,

When you're not having to be checking your email,

You're not having to do all this stuff,

You're not being called to be responsive to the world around us there is a quietude that can happen right,

The concentration that develops over these days,

The mindfulness the being able to see what's happening it certainly is not making it a more pleasant experience you know,

You'll have moments of pleasant experience but you're able to be with reality,

Right we're actually learning to swim in this stream of experience that's flowing by and it's very hard to do that when we're not,

And so that we can consider in our time here on retreat,

That there might be even more subtle aspects of that sense restraint that we can explore right,

It's not about imposing a heavy duty kind of discipline on yourself,

Right that's coming in again as like a behavior modification process but it's an exploration of like wow where am I you know,

When a sound happens am I always looking,

Right do I always look to see what that sound was that's always like a great place to just look,

Or do you just notice a sound,

You notice the response in the mind of what you think it is what it isn't,

And go on do we always need to kind of bring all our attention to everything that calls it and to see,

Like does that start to contain the energy a little bit what happens as a result of that what happens then when you decide to open up the attention you know,

You go outside,

You've been contained,

You've been kind of like holding it in you go outside and then you open up to the view we have here,

You know just that sense of like,

Oh,

Like there's a way that sometimes we can actually appreciate the beauty of things more actually with this mindfulness,

With this carefulness of what we're bringing in and what we're not you know,

When the mind isn't so agitated so grasping onto experience that it's not even experiencing it,

Right you can see that in all kinds of things,

That we don't even allow ourselves to appreciate the flavor of the food before we're on to like pulling up the next bite to our mouths what happens when we have some level of that sense restraint,

Right,

Of being like okay,

I'm going to take this moment,

I'm going to take this bite,

I'm going to take in this view you know,

Is there a place where the mind settles,

It stops being kind of agitated about the next thing that's coming down the line,

That we're trying to you know,

Make a deal with and negotiate even unpleasant experience where we sometimes find ourselves more sensitive to it it's another one of those things where people won't understand why you would have gotten so upset about some little thing you know,

On retreat it's possible you have this like,

A little thing happens and your mind can be like,

Wah you know,

Or even just a little bit of sadness you know,

You know that it's not the most overwhelming grief you've ever felt,

But a little bit of sadness it's like,

Ugh,

It's very powerful it's very poignant you know,

It can really affect us in a very powerful way,

A little just the breeze on our skin,

Right,

You can sensitize to these very simple experiences and that they're so actually impactful and you realize how desensitized we are and how everyone is like this everyone is actually this sensitive to every moment of experience and it's that vulnerability is so scary to us,

Right and simply because the mind is so untrained with it that we don't pay attention you know,

We build up all these unseen places of defense and resistance so that we stop experiencing life,

You know,

We build up all of these walls to it all of these restrictions to it so this sense of like,

Where do we where do we bring that sense of carefulness to where the attention is being drawn to the intensity and the speed with which we are experiencing life,

Right,

That we start to see we can have a little bit of control around that to explore and just see what is it like when we bring a little bit more of that quality of carefulness to our sense experience we can imagine,

You know,

This sometimes,

You know,

Just when you start to see how evocative,

You know,

One moment can be and the power it has on the heart that you see how susceptible we are then to pleasure and pain in a way that we don't always appreciate and how much harm we can create if we're not mindful,

If we're not aware of what's happening you know,

You can think of that person who,

You know,

Hears a beautiful bird song out the window and it's like we can love that song so much,

You know it can be so beautiful and so powerful and that if we're not aware of it,

Right,

We're not aware of that,

The pleasantness of it,

The appreciation of it the heart's enjoyment of it the starting to grasping of it,

Right that it can lead to this series of events,

You know,

Where maybe we then get a bird feeder and we get the right kind of seed for that kind of bird to come,

You know and it comes and we hear it but then it flies away and we have the same experience of like being joined with pleasure and then pleasure vanishing and it's not consistent enough so then,

You know,

The people do this all the time,

Where you capture a bird,

Right,

You put it into a cage and you keep it in your home and of course,

You know any time you do that,

Right,

That we try to control life in that way control this pleasurable experience in that way,

It's not the same song,

You know the song of a wild animal and the song of a caged animal it's not the same and sometimes,

You know,

They're unhappy,

You know,

They can stop eating,

They can die and again,

If we're not careful if we're not mindful of that then we just go to the store and get another bird,

You know keep reproducing this activity,

Keep reproducing this relationship to this pleasant experience but if we have some sense of mindfulness some sense of awareness of the moral quality of it,

Right of the volitional of the volitional of the what is motivating our actions then it's like,

Oh,

We can experience grief and remorse at seeing,

Oh,

Our actions have caused harm not replicating that experience,

Right,

Not going to just get another bird or another thing that's going to fulfill us in that way if we see it a little earlier than that you know,

We don't try to cage it,

We don't try to keep it right,

We're able to bear this bird coming and singing and leaving the heartache of that the happiness and the heartache if these qualities are stronger then it's just in that very moment we observe hearing we notice pleasure right,

We notice enjoyment we notice a contraction of the heart around the experience we notice the sense,

Oh I love this right and then we want to go,

Right,

We don't have to actually make anything happen out of that in fact,

We can start to see,

Oh wow this sense of me was a product of this experience not the creator of the experience,

This experience didn't happen to me me came at the end sound vedana pleasure,

You know,

Enjoyment,

Craving wanting perception,

Bird me and then clinging,

Right,

I want and that this notion of me and the bird and me and the experience gets,

It's that perceptual experience,

The perception of what happened is a little bit down the chain of events from the sound itself and the pleasure itself so that's the power of this mindfulness it's not just the mindfulness it's the energy,

It's the investigation it's the calm,

The concentration,

The equanimity the engrossment with experience,

Right,

It's the sense of the closer we're able to get to the source of that the more freedom we have the more freedom we have the more freedom we have around ethical conduct,

The more freedom we have around our own happiness,

Right to not imprison the world in our craving and to not ourselves be imprisoned by it and of course it's very hard you know,

It's like these rivers I've been to a few different places where it's like the headwaters of a river or a stream you know,

Sometimes they're calm and big other times,

You know,

They're just this like tiny place,

You know coming out of the earth where water is just gushing out,

You know this very powerful experience of seeing the the nacimiento,

The river where it's born,

Right and just like the the force of it coming out of the earth and then creating this long river to join other rivers,

To eventually join the ocean it's so intense in that place and that's what we're asking ourselves to be at,

Right we're asking ourselves to show up right here at the present moment where this flood of experience is being born and how intense it is,

Right how powerful the mind needs to be to be able to hang out there and observe and the you know,

The challenges and the ups and downs of that training you know,

To be able to be there and not just like force ourselves to be there but actually to be there in a totally peaceful calm,

Clear way of course it's challenging,

But that reward of that of having that total freedom with whatever experience arises is worth it,

You know and not being imprisoned by our preferences moment by moment by moment by moment by moment so I do,

I want to say a little just more about this shift in perspective around this is happening to me that our normal conditioned relationship to reality is that we're here somewhere in the center of what's happening right,

Even that even a subtle exploration of that becomes,

It becomes clear that that's sort of vague what that,

Where that place is where we are,

Right because of course we feel like we're our bodies but you know,

We have experiences where we see and that,

Ok,

It doesn't feel like our body it's pressure,

It's tingling,

It's tension it's lightness that the heart's identification with it can loosen or we see that you know,

If we lost our foot we lost our leg,

We lost this leg which parts of our bodies could be gone and have it still be us you know,

There's no rhyme or reason to that there's just,

You know,

At some point we would stop existing,

Right with some of these organs gone but this sense of like well,

Which of these is us and it doesn't have to be the whole thing obviously if we,

You know,

Lost a foot we'd still be us and yet,

Like,

How much of us has to go before we're not us anymore you know,

Well,

Ok,

So it's not the body then it's something else,

Internal but you watch that and you see that even everything else there is shifting,

Right the mind states change the thoughts change,

Of course there's a familiarity they're deeply conditioned,

Right there's this sense of patterning that's so familiar but we try to look for something internal that's also not changing very,

Um it can be just a fun practice at times,

You know,

Just when you're and it doesn't have to be like a huge monumental task it's like sometimes just look have fun with it,

The sense of ok,

Well where is this me that it feels like is at the center of all this,

You know check it out,

Keep looking but part of the part of the downside of that perspective is is a sense that is kind of reflected a lot in like Western psychology which again has its value but is,

It complicates this task a little bit because we start to feel this sense of well,

There's our there's ourselves that we're aware of and then there's this sort of unconscious part of ourselves underneath right,

This sense of dimensionality there's this and then there's all this stuff underneath and you know,

This sense of well I'm an angry person or I'm a you know,

A fearful person or I'm a very uptight person or I'm a excited person,

Whatever it is you know,

I'm a great person wherever those,

We think those things live we have this idea that it's sort of like underneath,

And that even if we're having like a good time right now underneath it we know that we have all these problems you know,

We have these neuroses that are just waiting to like reveal themselves,

You know that has its value,

Of course,

You know and,

But we get some freedom from that in this practice that's like really important and like kind of good to take advantage of because that's kind of awful,

Right,

In a way in this practice you don't have the sense or the orientation toward their being like these layers of self and layers of experience and layers of existence in the same way all you have is what's happening right now,

Right that there are experiences that are rising and passing right now in the present moment and that that is all that exists that we don't say anything else we don't make any assumptions about what those experiences imply,

Besides what we can actually observe about them and so if we live in practice in that way then we start to see things very differently right,

That actually there might be a moment of fear that arises but that we see that it's there are causes and conditions that lead to that moment of fear arising,

There are causes and conditions that change that lead to that moment of fear passing there are causes and conditions that lead to wanting arising,

That lead to it passing,

That lead to peace arising,

That lead to it passing that there is a painful sensation in the knee and if there's mindfulness of it oh,

That can lead to investigation the investigation can start to build energy right,

That energy can develop into a kind of engrossment with that experience that engrossment can is pleasant to the mind,

Right it can calm the mind,

It can calm the body that calm can lead to a deeper concentration that concentration being,

And then being able to bring these other factors to it can lead to a deep sense of equanimity of peace so we start to see that wow,

When mindfulness is there,

There's a possibility for interest,

When interest is there there's a possibility for energy,

When energy is there,

You know,

So that the relationship to this physical pain is one way now,

If the pain arises and there's no mindfulness then we're in agony and we trip out on it,

Right oh,

This is that same pain that has to do with when I was a kid and I fell off my bike and I know it's always going to be like this and I'm going to have to have an operation geez,

Who's going to pay for it who's going to take care of the cat right,

Like we've created a world that we're living in of anxiety right,

And whatever all the stuff that we do all the time and we're living in that world most of the time so then if there's mindfulness and we say oh,

There's pain oh,

Can we be interested,

We bring that interest,

But say then there is an energy right,

We're just tired for whatever reason then it's hard to keep the rest of it going then there's a sense of like,

Okay you're interested you're exploring,

But you kind of get sucked into it,

You know,

Some of these mental processes still unfold around,

Ugh,

How hard it is to actually be with it it's challenging to be with pain then the sense of doubt can arise the sense of hopelessness,

This despair can arise,

Right and so we see what's designed to help see is that it's like,

Oh,

Okay you're not making any kind of statement about the kind of person you are,

Right or anything about the future or anything about the past all we're seeing is,

There was an experience there was mindfulness,

There was interest there was not energy and then there was doubt then there was confusion then there was fear yes,

One thing will lead to another when certain conditions are present and other ones are not and so it's not personal in this very powerful way we have volition we have the ability to try to incline the mind toward mindfulness toward investigation,

Toward energy,

Toward all of these things toward concentration it's not to say there's no role or responsibility in it of course,

Right,

It's this paradox of self and non-self it's like,

Well,

If this thing is always changing who is it that's making the decisions?

Well,

You can see that in the moment there doesn't need to be a who there's the noticing of something there's the notion that,

Oh maybe some energy is called for can I cultivate some?

The sense of,

In the moment there's a moment of interest there's a moment of energy there's a moment of inclining toward concentration,

Whatever it is it doesn't need to be in conflict and so this the freedom that we can feel of the awareness of momentary experience that doesn't have to reflect on how we are evaluating ourselves how we think of ourselves it doesn't recreate,

Doesn't regenerate this stream of selfness that we're constantly recreating and living it you know,

This sense of wow,

We start to see that this stream of experience is actually reinforced and recreated each moment because if we see things with mindfulness it's so different than if we respond to things just out of wanting or just out of anger,

Just out of fear this,

Like with the bird right,

The sense of when we don't see that place of pleasure we don't see the wanting and the clinging in the heart,

Then we act out of that experience and that creates a whole chain of events of hardship,

You know,

For ourselves and for others it sets conditions in motion,

It conditions the next experience to arise and this sense of when there is more and more peace,

More and more awareness that comes out of just this familiarity,

Right,

That we have to just,

We have to keep going through all this all the time,

And it's not just trying to go through the perfect experience,

Right,

We need to see what experience is like when there's low energy,

We need to see what experience is like when there's no mindfulness,

When there's no concentration,

When there's no,

It's like this piece around understanding how all of these pieces are related,

How with,

You know,

The Buddha would say with the arising of this,

When this is that is when this isn't,

That isn't with the arising of this,

Comes the arising of that with the cessation of this comes the cessation of that right,

It's so simple but it's,

There are a lot of variables in terms of what the this and that are in all of these moments,

You know and so we're,

It's designed for us to see,

Oh yeah,

With these conditions this arises,

With these conditions this ceases and that we do our best to cultivate the conditions,

Of course that lead to more understanding more seeing,

More connection but we're also not bewildered or confused or upset or at war with the fact when those conditions aren't present,

Right,

Because we're not taking it personally,

We just see that it's like,

Well of course sleepiness happens you know,

Of course energy happens and if it's not if it's out of balance,

It's it's hard to view it,

It creates an unpleasant experience in the body and the mind.

And we start to yeah,

Develop this deepening relationship with all these things and this idea of like,

Just as they're unfolding just as they're happening that the mind can create a very different set of experiences,

Right,

That we,

That when the mind is full of loving-kindness or wisdom,

Caring compassion that actually an entirely different chain of experience unfolds based on each moment and that this isn't something we even can force we don't have to force it and we can't force it,

It comes through just this process of going over and over and over this material seeing it,

You know,

Becoming friendly with it becoming unafraid of it,

Right,

Becoming familiar and strengthening this capacity of mind for concentration,

For mindfulness the closer we get there is this sense of this peace that can arise right,

This when the mindfulness is so strong the equanimity is really pure that actually each experience,

The mind doesn't have to condition any next experience you know,

We can have moments where that conditionlessness is the abiding and of course then it might pick back up because we have years,

If not eons of conditions that we're having to ride out from the past so that's things we don't have control over these things are unfolding based on past conditions that we have to keep showing up for but the mind's capacity to not need anything from them to be free,

Irregardless of which arise is incredibly powerful the Buddha says,

But bhikkhus,

Monks when one has understood the impermanence of form of the body its change,

Fading away and cessation when one sees it as it really is with the correct wisdom thus,

In the past and also now,

All form is impermanent dukkha,

Subject to change then sorrow,

Lamentation,

Pain displeasure and despair are abandoned with their abandonment one does not become agitated being unagitated,

One dwells happily a bhikkhu who dwells happily is said to be quenched in that respect and he goes on to feeling,

Perception these formations of consciousness when one has understood the impermanence of all these things its change,

Its fading away its cessation and one sees as it really is with correct wisdom thus,

In the past and also now,

All consciousness is impermanent perception,

Formations,

Consciousness suffering,

Subject to change then sorrow,

Lamentation pain,

Displeasure and despair are abandoned with their abandonment,

One does not become agitated being unagitated one dwells happily a bhikkhu who dwells happily is said to be quenched in that respect and so and so sometimes you can get that taste of like,

Ugh that its through this wisdom through the understanding of the impermanence of things of the changeability of things of the undependability of things the sense of the relief actually that comes from that of course there's a part of that that's painful and that a lot of our practice life is hanging out in various degrees of how painful or not that is you know oh god,

Things are always changing and it's like,

Ok,

You know but the deeper we go the deeper the acceptance of the mind the totality of the impermanence of things there's this relief,

This sense of quenchedness of the heart not clinging towards anything because it knows nothing is going to provide it that satisfaction that it thought it was looking for and the sense of the heart just not needing it it abandons it it abandons it out of understanding it lets it go it puts down the sword and shield not needing to be at war with reality moment by moment dwelling unagitated at peace and then the opposite when we're not seeing that when we're not that subtle with the mind the Buddha says in the Mahanidhana Sutta thus Ananda is close companion independence upon feeling tone there is craving independence upon craving there is seeking independence upon seeking there is acquiring independence upon acquiring there is ascertaining there's desire and lust independence upon desire and lust there's attachment independence upon attachment there's possessiveness possessiveness there's stinginess.

Independence upon stinginess there's defensiveness.

Independence upon defensiveness,

Because of defensiveness,

Various evil and unwholesome phenomena originate.

The taking up of clubs and weapons,

Conflicts,

Quarrels and disputes,

Insulting speech,

Slander and falsehood.

So it's that this is that process,

This sense of understanding how this,

With the chain of events that unfolds with wisdom,

Without wisdom,

With insight,

Without insight,

Right?

With energy,

Without it,

With concentration,

Without it,

With all of these phenomena.

And that just deepening,

Deepening understanding of this process of what's unfolding moment by moment and the very real repercussions in our own lives,

In the lives of others.

Buddha talks about that,

He'll say,

You know,

When someone has liberated their mind in this way,

Right?

That peace where the mind doesn't condition future phenomena.

His stream is cut,

You know,

This phrase that you see over and over again.

And it's like,

Oh,

We can start to understand that,

Right?

That sense of like,

The flow of things stops going.

We stop regenerating this,

Even in the metta sutta that we're chanting,

You know,

The end,

You know,

One is not reborn into this world.

Does not,

The other translation is,

You know,

Is not born again into this sense of whether we believe in rebirth in that kind of cosmic way.

It doesn't matter.

You see it happening moment by moment,

Right?

We're constantly reaffirming ourselves,

Constantly recreating ourselves,

Reasserting ourselves into the picture out of this insecurity with the instability of things.

And that sense of when that peacefulness is there,

And the stream is cut,

That just that not needing to keep doing that,

That sense of not re-conjuring ourselves moment by moment.

There are many lists in the tradition,

But one that I'll just offer today as,

You know,

A piece of reflection is this list called the five faculties or the five powers.

They are faith,

Energy,

Concentration,

Mindfulness,

And wisdom.

And I think one of the reasons why I have liked to start offering it is because I think there is something so important to talk about in terms of faith and to explore for ourselves and to really understand that there is something that is important to us.

And I think that there is something that is important to us that is important to us that is important to us that is important to us that is important to us that is important to us,

That is important to us.

And in the sense that we offer,

What that word tends to mean in English,

Which is basically like belief,

Belief in something that we can't prove,

This isn't that kind of faith.

This is this confidence in what I would say in this moment,

Right?

It's the confidence in reality,

Right?

The mind's confidence,

This faith that actually reality is manageable,

That we actually can be with it.

The mind,

Heart,

Has the capacity to be with things as they're unfolding in a peaceful way,

In an understanding way,

In a compassionate way,

In a kind way.

And it's so important for us to consider that,

You know,

Consider our sense of relationship to that notion.

Because while we may not feel always like we have that sense of ability,

Right,

There are going to be times for sure where this doesn't feel possible,

You know.

I mean,

Absolutely,

You know,

Where it's like the sense of,

Oh,

I can't do this,

Or this can't be done.

And that's okay.

That's doubt,

Right?

And it's like you just note it.

A moment of doubt,

You know.

And it's like no problem.

And then this other thing over time that if you really look at it,

We all,

If you keep with the practice,

You're going to have times where you know you've shown up for something very difficult in a very different way,

You know,

That you've actually been able to show up for a physical pain that's hard,

For an emotional pain that's hard,

For whatever,

A mental experience,

A sense experience that you would have normally had a certain kind of relationship to.

And because of these capacities that you're developing,

There's a different relationship to it at times when the conditions are supportive of it.

And so this faith of like,

Okay,

When the conditions are supportive,

The mind can do this is so important to remember,

Especially in those times when the faithlessness seems stronger,

Right?

When the doubt seems stronger.

Even if you aren't going to totally convince yourself,

You can remind yourself,

Right,

That maybe you have one experience that you remember,

And that you can use as a touch point of like,

Okay,

This happened,

You know,

This happened,

The mind had stretched,

And was peaceful with something very difficult,

You know,

Very compelling one way or another.

And when we don't have that faith,

There's that next thing on the list,

Which is energy,

Right,

Often translated as courageous energy.

So we can see that like,

Okay,

There are times where that faith might not be that strong.

But you,

If you don't have faith,

Maybe you can find courage.

Right?

Maybe there is this sense of like,

I don't actually know that I can do this.

But I'm gonna try,

You know,

I'm gonna actually try to be with this experience,

I'm gonna try to have a relationship with it doesn't mean I'm going to try to obliterate it,

Right?

Try to rip it out,

You know,

This is like,

I'm going to try to bring these skills to it,

These capacities of the mind.

And then when we don't have the courage,

Well,

Then we go to our tools,

Our skills,

Mindfulness and concentration,

These things that we're training in,

You know,

These capacities of the mind that we get are difficult to build difficult to develop,

But our trainings that nevertheless,

We have moments where we feel like they're stronger.

I won't go into more detail about,

You know,

We'll continue the conversation about concentration and mindfulness,

With the sense of like,

Okay,

These are like the hard skills,

Bringing the attention in,

Observing,

You know,

It's like,

Well,

We,

You know,

We do that.

And then finally,

Wisdom,

If we don't always trust our own wisdom,

Because sometimes we don't,

Again,

You know,

Run this question of faith,

This,

We all have it,

We have these deep understandings,

We have had these experiences that incline the attention toward this incredible and radical,

Different understanding of the nature of reality.

And sometimes it's more or less available,

You know,

It's always in the background,

But sometimes it's in like the way back,

You know,

So if we don't trust our own wisdom,

There's this sense of like,

Yeah,

The wisdom of the teachings,

The wisdom of the tradition,

Right,

The sense that other people have gone before us have faced these things,

Have succeeded,

You know,

Have gone through hardship,

Have found their way through,

Right,

This sense of,

Okay,

Well,

There's a whole tradition,

Teachers and lineage that can help give us that confidence at times when we need it.

And the other piece of that is this learning how,

You know,

The wisdom is not just,

It's part of that is understanding things are impermanent,

Understanding things are suffering if we're relating to them in a certain way,

Understanding things are,

You know,

Changing,

There isn't a solid self,

All of that.

And there is a part of wisdom that is about understanding the relationship between things,

Right,

The conditionality that's at play in each moment of what's unfolding.

And so this sense of like,

Okay,

The faith,

The courage,

The tools,

And the sense of like,

Understanding the wisdom of where to bring the attention.

Sometimes we're really overwhelmed,

Sometimes things are so,

Feel so beyond our capacity.

No faith,

No courage,

No.

The tools,

No,

You know,

And so then there is this thing that we've been trying to really encourage folks to understand of this moving away from the object.

And of course,

We understand how hard that is,

Because 99%,

If not more,

Of our tradition is giving us the tools and training about how to move toward an object,

Right,

How to relate to something,

Whatever it is.

And of course it is,

Because that's how insight happens is through that relationship.

And yet,

There actually is this like,

Really important piece about how to move away from an object and when to move away from an object,

Because the conditions are so unsupportive of our ability to be with it in that moment,

Right?

The mindfulness isn't there,

The energy isn't there,

The concentration isn't there,

Whatever,

Right?

There's some volatility alive,

There's some,

The conditions are overwhelming,

So that we learn how to withdraw,

How to move away from an overwhelming object and find rest and sanctuary and safety,

Come back to stability in,

You know,

We try to find these sort of wholesome ways of creating buoyancy in the mind,

Right?

So this sense of,

We may tell you at times,

Okay,

Don't worry about going to every sitting,

You know,

Take a break,

Go take a walk,

Go walk into the forest,

Go into the river,

You know,

Like,

There are times where it's like,

We need to take our foot off the gas in order to heal our wounds,

You know,

To come out of the conflict,

The intensity of that,

Get some breathing room,

Get some grounding,

Get some stability,

So that we go in.

And it's very different than the habitual response of just going to pleasure as a retraction from pain.

It's a skillful means,

Right?

It's an understanding that we don't,

The conditions aren't supportive of our engagement,

And so we need to take care of ourselves,

Find safe harbor,

Find refuge.

Sometimes there's ways of doing that within the meditation practice,

Right?

Bringing the attention to a different object or opening the attention really wide,

Going to love and kindness,

Right?

We have all these tools that are kind of within the container of our practice.

And then there are tools that are outside of that.

And to know that we have to learn how to bring all of those to bear through a life of practice,

You know,

We won't make it otherwise.

Our systems have to trust us to be able to pull us out of a war we're not going to win in order to be willing to show back up when the conditions are favorable,

Right?

And so there is this dance that we are encouraging and honoring in terms of how this practice can actually work over time.

But I think just this last piece of what's such a beautiful and challenging part of this is like all this energy you're going to put in and all the energy you are putting in and all this good effort.

It's so beautiful.