Guided Loving-Kindness Practice | Unique Method

Did you know that Loving-Kindness Meditation leads to awakening? It's true. In the earliest Buddhist Suttas the practice of the Brahma Viharas (Divine Abidings of Mind) leads to the ultimate goal of Enlightenment. The first part of the process is to develop the wholesome quality of Loving-kindness for yourself and a spiritual friend. This is what this meditation will accomplish. An important part of developing Loving-Kindness is how to handle the mind hindrances. You will learn the 6R process of Right Effort which is right there in the texts but is little practiced today. This turbo-charges your progress. When one learns how to allow and relax the tension and tightness caused by a hindrance, then one is on the threshold of Nibbana. The meditation is 30 minutes which is the recommended period.

Transcript

Welcome.

This is a guided loving kindness or metta meditation instruction.

For more information you can go to damasuka.

Org and read more about it.

First,

Find a comfortable position.

You can sit on a cushion or sit in a chair.

There is no magic to the floor.

We want you to be comfortable.

There shouldn't be any discomfort that's from your body.

The mind will have enough to keep you busy.

Relax.

Whatever is comfortable.

Take a deep breath.

Let it out.

Take a minute or two to just be here.

Here in the present.

This meditation is about observation and not trying.

Simply being and allowing.

Notice you are breathing.

Notice the feelings happening in the body.

Notice the feeling of sitting.

How is your mind?

Is it sleepy or is it awake and full of energy?

Are you feeling restless or calm?

Relax and slow down.

Settle into the chair,

Into the cushion.

Relax your whole body.

Everything that comes into your awareness,

Simply release it and relax and come back to the present.

Don't pay any particular attention to anything.

This will turn into later what we call the six Rs.

See how your mind is becoming spacious.

You notice the entire room and everything going on around you.

You relax and be with it.

Everything is okay.

You feel some gratitude for being allowed to sit quietly with nothing to do.

You are thankful for having some time for yourself.

So let's get started with our metta,

Our loving kindness meditation or what we call from the suttas the practice of the Brahma Viharas.

When you practice loving kindness meditation,

You first start by sending loving and kind thoughts to yourself.

You remember a time when you were happy.

When that happy feeling arises,

Smile.

It's a warm glowing feeling in the center of your chest.

The feeling is like holding a baby and looking into its eyes.

You feel this radiant loving kindness in your heart.

Or perhaps a puppy or a kitten.

Whatever brought you this feeling of kindness,

Of warmth.

You let it be there.

You didn't try,

You just allowed.

Feel that happy feeling now.

A really helpful technique is to smile.

Put a little smile on your lips,

Just a little a buddha smile.

Smile from your heart and smile from your mind.

Smiling can pull you out of negative states and thinking.

It's a smile during your whole sitting,

Always come back to a feeling of happiness with a smile.

Now take this happy feeling and radiate it to yourself.

Help it along with some phrases like,

May I be happy?

May I be content?

May I be peaceful?

Don't just say these phrases like a mantra.

You need to feel them and only use phrases as reminders of that warm,

Beautiful feeling.

Phrases are not the object.

They're only to nudge along this beautiful feeling.

This feeling of loving kindness.

Now sit with your back reasonably straight,

Not too tight.

Don't move your body at all.

Don't wiggle your toes.

Don't wiggle your fingers.

Don't scratch,

Don't rub,

Don't change your posture.

Don't rock back and forth.

Sit very still like a buddha statue.

And remember on every buddha statue,

The buddha is smiling,

A little smile,

Smile of equanimity,

Of happiness.

When you don't move,

It's like getting water to freeze.

You can observe the water,

But you can't push it or move it.

You have to let it be there,

Freezing by itself.

Relax into any tension and tightness that makes you want to move.

Relax smile.

You have this time for yourself.

Be content.

Put everything else aside.

Tell your mind you'll think about all these things later that might come up.

Don't worry,

They'll come up if they need to.

May I be happy.

May I be content.

May I smile and be peaceful.

May I have gratitude for everything that I have.

As soon as that warm,

Loving feeling arises,

Make a wish for your own happiness.

May I be free from suffering.

May my mind be uplifted.

May my mind be peaceful and calm.

May my mind be open and accepting.

May I have happiness.

May I have joy.

Are you smiling?

Put that little smile on your lips and feel that smile radiating throughout your body.

May I be content.

Whatever wish you make for yourself,

Feel that sincere wish.

You know what it feels like to be peaceful and calm.

Bring that feeling into your heart.

Radiate that feeling to yourself.

Wish for yourself to be happy.

Whatever wish you verbalize,

Make it with a smile.

Feel that wish.

You can make the same wish again as long as it has sincere meaning for you.

Or you can change the wish occasionally.

May I be happy.

May my whole body be completely relaxed.

Now when you're sitting,

Your mind is going to wander and think about other things.

As soon as you notice mind is thinking about other things,

Simply let go of those thoughts.

Even if you're in mid-sentence,

Just let it go and relax.

Inhale and come back to this feeling of loving kindness.

Relax any tension and tightness in your mind caused by the thoughts.

Thoughts of desire,

Thoughts of the future,

Thoughts of the past,

Thoughts of things you want to do in the present.

I want.

I don't want.

I I.

Relax and smile.

Release these thoughts.

Come back to the feeling of loving kindness and make a wish for your own happiness with another smile.

It doesn't matter if your mind wanders 50 times during a sitting.

Even 50 times you see that you let it go.

You relax.

You come back with a smile to your meditation object.

That is a good sitting.

A bad sitting would be if you stop smiling when you notice that you're thinking and you continue thinking about it and you don't let it go.

That's having no awareness and no mindfulness.

While you're sitting,

There can be sensations that arise in your body.

You might want to cough or there's an itch,

Heat,

Vibration,

Or just some painful feeling.

Doesn't matter.

As soon as that arises,

Your mind will be drawn to it.

You'll start to think about that sensation.

I wish it would stop.

I really don't like this feeling when it happens.

I wish it would just go away.

Every thought like that makes the feeling become bigger and more intense.

Allow them,

Relax into them.

If you do need to cough,

You simply allow that to happen and continue on.

If you need to swallow,

Go ahead.

Just don't move your body and relax.

The very first thing you do is to let go of a thought about the sensation.

Release your attention from it.

Just stop thinking about it.

That's release.

Relax the tension or tightness in your mind,

In your head.

That's the next thing.

You just release.

You stop thinking about it and then you relax.

That desire that pulls you to the thought makes you want to go to the store and whatever it is.

You may notice there's still a tight mental fist wrapped around that sensation because you really don't like that sensation and you really want it to go away.

The truth is when a sensation arises,

It's there.

That's the truth.

You can't change it.

You can't wish for it to be something else.

It is just what it is.

So we be mindful.

We be in the present.

Everything is okay.

And it's okay for that sensation to be there.

It has to be okay because it's there.

Anytime you try to fight with the truth,

Anytime you try to control the truth,

Anytime you try to make the truth be anything other than it is,

That is the cause of suffering.

Wanting to change things,

Wanting things to be something other than they are.

Something that you have to do in the future.

You have to make something better.

No,

Everything is okay right now.

Again,

Allow that sensation to be there.

Make it okay for it to be there.

Relax.

Gently come back to the feeling of being happy and making a wish for your own happiness.

While you're doing this meditation,

Remember this is a smiling meditation.

Remember you want to put a smile in your mind and even though your eyes are closed,

Put a little smile in your eyes.

Put a smile on your lips,

A little one and a smile in your heart.

Radiate that smile from your heart.

Whenever you notice that you're not smiling,

Start again.

Gently.

Don't push,

Don't control.

Just everything let it be.

You have all the time in the world.

After about 10 minutes,

Now we can start sending loving and kind thoughts to a spiritual friend.

One spiritual friend.

In the beginning of your training,

The objective of this one spiritual friend is described in this way.

A spiritual friend is someone of the same sex.

They're not a family member and they are alive.

Easy.

A spiritual friend is someone who when you think of them and their good qualities,

You really like them.

You respect them and you will sincerely wish them happiness.

Once you pick your friend,

Don't change the friend to someone else.

Stay with just this one friend for some time and you are told that it's okay to change.

Now this friend can be a friend of yours.

It can be your teacher.

It can be somebody who you know very well and you like them and you respect them.

Somebody that you can feel loving kindness for and you don't have other thoughts that interfere.

Now we're trying to get the mind to stay with just one object in the beginning.

Later when there are signs of progress in your meditation,

We'll add more people and other methods,

But not just yet.

Now you make a wish for your spiritual friend's happiness.

Just like you did for yourself.

Make a wish for his or her happiness.

May you be free from suffering.

May your mind be uplifted.

May your mind be peaceful and calm.

Smile at your friend.

Hold them in your heart.

May your mind be open and accepting.

May you have happiness just as I do.

May you have joy.

Whatever wish you want to make for your friend,

Feel that wish.

Take your spiritual friend and put them right in the middle of your heart.

Smile and give them a great big heart hug.

Wish your friend well.

Feel that wish.

Take a real interest in your friend.

Really like them.

Now you don't have to visualize perfectly your friend.

All you have to do is know they're there.

You are just hanging out with your friend.

Wrapping them up in good kind thoughts.

If the feeling slips a little,

Smile more and move back to sending it to yourself to build it up again.

Then come back to your friend and keep it going with another smile.

We only use one spiritual friend to begin our training.

Because the mind may want to distract itself because it says,

Oh,

Another spiritual friend is good,

Let me go there.

But that's actually the mind distracting itself and not being able to stay with one object.

Later,

You'll use other people and other groups of people.

So continue with your spiritual friend.

Wrap him or her up in your heart and hold them.

Remember that puppy,

Remember that baby.

Bring your loving kindness to them just like you did before.

If your mind wanders,

Remember to release the thought.

Relax the tension pulling you.

Resmile,

Return to your object,

Your feeling of loving kindness for your friend and repeat.

These are the six Rs.

These remind you of what to do when your mind wanders.

We don't jerk our mind back because if we do that,

Our mind will just keep doing it again and again.

We only observe when it has wandered.

We allow it and then we just relax.

We don't try to control,

But we see the tension and tightness.

We go,

Okay,

That's okay.

Then it fades and then we smile and come back.

This is different than many other methods and it's much more effective.

May my friend be happy.

May they be free from suffering.

May they be happy.

May they feel the kindness in my heart.

May they be at peace in the present moment.

May everything be well in their lives.

May they feel gratitude for what they have.

May they be free of anger.

May their mind and their heart be cool.

Keep them in your heart.

Give them a heart hug.

Wrap them up in happiness.

May we both be happy.

May we both be loving and kind.

May our minds be peaceful and quiet.

May our minds be relaxed and still.

May my friend get everything that they need,

Especially contentment and happiness.

May their health be free of issues.

May their health be perfect and radiant.

May they be happy.

May they be content.

Now this is a feeling meditation.

Notice this feeling of loving kindness and again don't put too much attention on what they look like but what the feeling that you feel feels like.

It can be subtle,

It can be strong,

It can be weak,

It doesn't matter.

Just stay with this feeling,

This warm glowing feeling.

Don't hold on to it,

Just observe it.

Let it be there and when your mind wanders,

Notice how it does that.

Investigate what happened first,

What happened second.

And smile again and come back to your friend.

May all beings be happy and content.

You can visit our website when you think you have things that you want to discuss.

Reviews

That was so beautifully led thank you, I had tears as I so touched into my feelings toward my spiritual friend.

Excellent metta guidance, though limited only to self and someone you hold dear

Metta, David sir,
It helps me when my mind is over thinking and it helps me to bring back my mindfulness,calmness and bring back metta to self and my spiritual friend.

Perfect.

Thank you. Will do more. Thanks for the reminder not to move.

Nicely spoken-soothing-calming-a blessing-
Thank you
Namaste 🙏🏻
🙇‍♂️

really like that one. especially adding another 10-15 minutes in stillness afterwards. mucho metta!

Very nice, centering, loving. Thank you and be well. ☮️💖🙏

Like it a lot, thanks!

Best loving kindness on the app

Beautiful guided TWIM* mettā meditation with gentle background music and guiding with a relaxing pace all the way for the 30 minutes.

... *: "Tranquil Wisdom Insight Meditation", TWIM or samatha-vipassanā is serenity and insight yoked together and, according to the TWIM perspective, the practice Buddha meditated with on the night of his awakening:

"he recalled an incident at a ploughing festival while he was just a young boy of one or two years old.

When his attendants left him alone under a rose-apple tree, he sat in "Tranquil Wisdom Insight Meditation" (samatha/vipassanā) and experienced a mind that was expanded and open, completely free from all tension or tightness (craving)!

He saw that this form of meditation would lead him to the experience of the "tranquility jhāna" (samatha/vipassanā), instead of the “concentration [absorption] jhāna.”

As a result of the Tranquil Wisdom Insight Meditation (TWIM or samatha/vipassanā), his mind was filled with joy; his body became light and happy.

When the joy faded away, he then experienced strong tranquility and peacefulness.

His mind and body became very comfortable and at ease.

His mind was composed, very still with sharp mindfulness and full awareness of what was happening around him, i.e., he could still hear sounds and feel sensations with his body at that time.

When the Bodhisatta (future Buddha) sat under the Bodhi tree to meditate on the full-moon night of May and made his great effort to attain the supreme Nibbāna, he recalled that not all forms of pleasure are unwholesome.

He had these thoughts because he had practiced so many austerities to make pleasant feeling go away by torturing himself.

He realized that there could be pleasurable feelings arising in mind and body, although there was not any attachment to anything.

That very night the Bodhisatta practiced Tranquil Wisdom Insight Meditation (TWIM or samatha/vipassanā) through the method of the 6R’s (Right Effort)."

... Above quote from the book
Life is Meditation - Meditation is Life:
A Practical Guide to the “Emancipation Proclamation” of the Ānāpānasati Sutta and Loving-Kindness Meditation
by Bhante Vimalaraṁsi (2014-2016)

This meditation is absolutely fantastic. I love it. Thank you.

TWIM is changing my life for the better

Wonderful, wonderful meditation.
Perfectly phrased and paced I've been listening daily for several weeks.

Thank you😁🙏❤️

Very clear instructions. Easy to stay with. Effective.

I have tried many Metta meditations, this was by far the most powerful.

Thank you! The feelings were so light and warm and I love sending them to others! I found it was easier to send to others than to myself

I love it 🥰 it really made me smile. Thank you 🙏

Wonderful. Thanks.