We in the West are raised in a culture of obligation.
This certainly gets things done,
But at what cost?
If you've ever been sat at a family dinner wishing you were somewhere else,
There is almost certainly some underlying resentment going on.
And resentment doesn't go too well with grandma's sprouts.
Wouldn't it be better if you did the things you do because you wanted to?
This may seem idealistic.
Very few people want to go to work,
For example.
But why?
Millions of people bully themselves into getting out of bed far earlier than they'd like each day to go to a job they'd rather not do.
The rationale is,
I need the money.
And here we collide with the widespread delusion around just what constitutes a need.
You need to breathe.
You need to drink.
You need to eat.
You need clothing and shelter.
Sometimes you need medicine.
That's about it for needs.
But if you're anything like me,
You want more than this.
And for the things we want,
We need a certain amount of money.
So we go to work.
For me,
Work is teaching people to play drums.
Which,
Honestly,
Is a pretty sweet gig.
That doesn't mean that I would choose to do it every day in a world where all my needs were already met,
Though.
What gets me through the days that I'd really rather not be around loud noise is the acknowledgement that I'm choosing to go do it.
It's not a should.
It's not an ought.
It's not a must.
If I want a Netflix subscription,
I need money.
Now it's seen that the uncomfortable ear protectors are actually interdependently linked to my entertainment.
I could choose the renunciate life if I preferred.
Then I would have neither Netflix nor a job.
Currently,
I'm choosing to be in the world.
And knowing that it's a choice makes it much,
Much easier.
Shortly after I began spiritual practice in earnest,
I dropped obligation for a time.
If I didn't want to see people,
I didn't see people.
If I didn't want to perform,
I didn't perform.
I actually let quite a few people down.
This wasn't ideal,
But it allowed me to go deeper into my thoughts and feelings around each activity that I turned down,
And to investigate whether or not there was any real value to be found,
Absent of the societal pressure that I'd been engaging on.
Sure enough,
In taking a break and allowing myself the option of declining,
I found after a while that I wanted to go eat grandma's sprouts because I loved them and I loved grandma.
This,
As you can probably imagine,
Was an entirely different kind of interaction.
So,
Next time you find yourself doing something because you feel you should,
I encourage you to stop.
Maybe that means not doing the thing.
Maybe it just means reconsidering its value.
And if you still hate sprouts,
Just grab some more salt.
