Hey,
It's Dana Mitchell here for another one of our Clarity Chats.
So,
Thank you for joining me today.
As I sat down to work on our topic for today,
Lo and behold,
My phone notifications started going off.
It was not an emergency,
It was social media.
A number popped up onto the screen and before I realized it,
I had picked up my phone and my attention was gone.
I was pulled towards that tiny little red circle with the notification number in it like it was breaking news.
You know that feeling too,
That little badge,
The ping,
The buzz,
All shouting,
Hey,
Look at me,
Even when you're in the middle of something else.
A half an hour later,
I realized what I had done.
I had let the phone notifications and social media take over my day.
So,
Here's the wild thing.
I think we both know this.
Apps are designed to make you respond.
Every sound,
Every flash of light,
Every color,
Vibration,
It taps straight into your brain's reward system.
It's classic psychology.
If you've ever heard of Pavlov's dog hearing a bell salivating for food,
Only now we're the ones being trained.
So,
Let's break this down.
If you've ever fallen into this endless scroll habit or found yourself checking your phone for no reason,
Please know it's not a lack of willpower.
It's your brain doing what it's wired to do and the app developers and the advertisers,
They know exactly how to get our attention and keep it.
For me,
Facebook is the thing.
I'm most comfortable there.
I'm in the groups.
I have a feed.
I find myself getting sucked in again and again to Facebook.
I used to tell myself I am just checking in,
But really what I was doing was letting those notifications run my day.
And most of those alerts weren't even important.
Half the time,
They were posts from people I didn't even know or groups I had forgotten I had joined.
I'm a Gen Xer and I did not grow up with a phone,
So how did I even get to this point?
So,
The other day,
I decided to do something simple but a little bit brave.
I turned off those notifications,
The Facebook notifications,
All of them.
I really did it.
I couldn't even believe it after I'd made this big decision to do it.
And wow,
I was really surprised that it was awkward at first.
I had all kinds of feelings coming up about doing this.
What am I missing?
What if somebody's trying to reach me?
What if I miss a coaching request?
Oh my goodness,
I couldn't believe that this was my reaction.
It felt like every few minutes I had to go and fight the urge to open the app.
My thumb was hovering over the screen like it had a mind of its own.
I'd open up my phone,
See nothing,
And then still had the urge to refresh like muscle memory.
But here's what surprised me.
Within a couple of days,
The quiet started to kind of feel good.
My focus came back a little bit more and more each day.
I could write,
I could think,
Breathe without that constant hum of waiting for something to happen.
And guess what?
The world did not fall apart.
The messages were still there,
Just waiting quietly until I decided to check back in on them.
That's when it hit me.
I had been reacting instead of choosing.
And one small change gave me back more time.
I felt more calm and honestly a little bit more creative than I expected to.
So I went to challenge you,
My friend.
Turn off one set of notifications,
Just one.
Pick an app that grabs your attention the most and turn off those notifications.
Or if you're not into social media,
Then try turning off your ringer for a few minutes during the day.
If you have to,
You could even schedule time on your calendar when you want to go back in and check rather than checking all day long.
Begin to notice what shifts.
Maybe it's your focus,
Your breathing,
Reduced anxiety triggers,
Or maybe you might become a little bit more patient.
It's not about cutting yourself off from the world.
It's about reclaiming your attention from things that don't deserve it.
So as I close today,
Just a friendly reminder to both of us that the app doesn't have to be in control anymore.
You are.
Thanks for joining me today.
I love helping you get unstuck,
Helping you shift your perspective,
And to keep your momentum going.
I hope you have a really great rest of your day.
Bye for now.
