Shared Story Series: Longing

The Shared Story Series is a collection of meditations designed to honor that all emotions are part of our shared human experience and it is okay to feel these emotions, even welcome them, and learn from them - together. This is the Shared Story of Longing.

Transcript

Welcome to the Shared Story series.

The intention of this series is really to remind us that meditation is not about denying or eliminating our feelings.

Every emotion is part of the human experience,

And no person,

No life,

No matter how zen or wonderful,

Is immune or exempt from this feeling experience.

Meditation is about acknowledging and honoring emotions in order to create space to observe them from a place of acceptance and peace.

And I created this series because I,

Being human,

Have these emotions,

And I thought how amazing to be able to connect with each of you in the sharing of this space.

A reminder that wherever we are,

Whatever our heart is feeling,

We are not alone.

And so this is the Shared Story of longing.

And taking nice,

Easy,

Deep breaths.

Allowing your body to settle.

Encouraging the mind to soften and quiet.

Knowing that through the magic of technology and shared energy,

We sit here together.

Breathing easily.

Coming fully present into this moment.

To sit with and honor the emotion of longing.

And in this moment,

Longing is real for me.

The ache is deep and the void wide.

And if I am honest,

I can say there is even an anger floating around the edges.

That somehow we are meant to have this thing for which we long.

On some level there is a certainty that it is meant.

And I chafe at this unfulfilled promise of it.

Do you feel that too?

There is the ache of longing and then the shimmer of those other emotions.

And the logic of our mind serves no purpose,

Timing,

Patience,

Rationale.

They mean nothing.

For the truth is deep and we know,

We believe,

We are certain that what we long for is meant to be and is simply agonizingly late.

We feverishly try to figure out how to grasp it,

Manifest it,

Draw it to us,

Create it,

Force it,

Power it,

Will it to us.

And it cannot be done.

You cannot will it,

I cannot will it,

This thing for which we long.

Breathe.

And there is the truth.

This thing for which we long,

Whatever it is for you personally,

Is not here,

Not now.

Only the void.

Only the ache.

And there is that heartbeat of longing echoing through every cell of our bodies.

And even as I listen to that heartbeat,

I hear something else.

Even deeper than that heartbeat.

There is a quiet voice that says,

Shh,

Be still and listen.

That which we desire exists,

It is available to us.

But there is no trick,

No magic,

No spell,

No formula for making it happen.

Only the essence of the breath.

Only the trust that everything,

In every way,

Serves a purpose and serves us well if we allow it.

And there is one thing I have learned about longing that has proven to be true for me.

And it works like this.

Imagine that you are swimming.

And there is a leaf floating on the water in front of you.

And as you reach out to grasp that leaf,

Your motion towards it sends it floating further away from you.

You try again,

Reaching out towards that leaf to grasp it on the surface of the water.

And your motion pushes it away.

That is the nature of grasping.

That is the nature of wanting and longing.

Our intensity,

Our desperation,

Push away the very thing we long to draw near.

And we can stop.

We can stop that longing and pushing,

And we can breathe.

Just breathe.

Remember that it is the essence of the breath that allows what we desire to be available to us.

And here we sit supporting each other.

Already it is easier to breathe into a place of acceptance and allowing,

Knowing that you are here with me,

That we are doing it together,

Knowing that we are not alone in this human experience of longing.

I am here in the thick of it with you,

Feeling it,

Breathing it.

This is real for me too,

This shared story.

There are no easy answers,

And even that leaves me dissatisfied.

What I long for is out of my control.

Perhaps that is true for you too.

That it is not a matter of working harder,

Pushing more,

Being different,

Changing anything.

Nowhere to go,

There is nothing I can do.

Getting this thing that I want is completely out of my control.

And maybe you think there is more you can or should be doing.

And maybe you are weary,

Tired of the effort.

I understand,

I know that feeling too.

So we can only breathe into this space,

Allowing what is without judgment.

And we honor it by feeling it,

By allowing it.

We can hold space of love and togetherness for each other.

We can honor that we are not alone in this longing.

That you and I and every other human being on the planet knows this feeling.

And therein lies the gift.

When we want to reach and grasp and demand,

Determined to have what we ache for,

The wisest part of us knows all this emotion will simply push it away.

And so we breathe.

Fully present.

Finding our breath together in this moment.

And it is okay to recognize that this is a tug of war between letting go and then being consumed.

Letting go and the longing returns.

The longing ricochets back and forth.

The ache eases and then is back.

It is a practice.

Like meditation,

Moment to moment,

An awareness and a commitment to letting go.

Sometimes it is easy and I am so grateful when letting go is easy.

And sometimes the gaping void drops me to my knees.

And I am saved by my breath.

It is a practice.

A conscious effort to connect to the breath and because it is so real and so common,

Yes,

Longing is common.

Here I sit with you.

Just breathing.

Let it be easy.

Just for now.

Can we let it be easy?

Can we let the ache ease just a little bit and breathe a little bit deeper?

And somehow knowing that you and I are in this practice together of letting go of longing and honoring if it shows back up again.

Somehow that makes it better.

And I have found a little bit of peace.

And from this place of tentative peace,

I hold light for you and your ability to let go of longing.

I offer you love and compassion for the challenge that is longing.

It is a natural ebb and flow.

Just for this moment.

Let us flow together with breath.

Sharing this story.

Here,

Now.

Breathe in a moment of peace.

Thank you for breathing with me.

For honoring the practice and the shared story.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Reviews

That was great. I am really longing to be loved. I know it’s going to happen. I just want it now!

Bethany, that was so beautiful. I shed a couple of tears while listening to this. I have been grasping for so long, clinging to the wish that I had done things differently in the past. I felt the ache in my stomach and wrapped my arms around myself. Hopefully, with time, this ache will heal and I’m so thankful I found this meditation. I’m sure it will help.

identifying longing as a key part of my process behavior addiction has been an extremely significant and poignant aspect of my growth within a therapeutic program these past few weeks. there have been times where i've searched for answers in the various teachers and meditations on this app and left feeling the same or confused or helpless. this expirience, tuning into longing, is one i will come back to. it's so hard, and so touching. thank you

Beautiful! Thank you for creating this space to long

Brilliant beautiful meditation. The pacing, your voice, your approach to the subject matter, the background music. It was divinely perfect for me. Thank you.

Simply beautiful - thank you. I am glad I'm not alone in longing ❤️

Outstanding! And on point. Thank you so much for sharing and helping me find a moment of peace where I could hear my honest voice.

It helped to identify what I was longing for and sit with it. Bethany is a kind presence to work through it with.

116 days ago now, my husband passed on to his lighter body. I felt as if I would die and didn’t care if I did.

I long for him.

The night after he left I was woken up from a dream. I rarely feel my dreams or even remember having them, but this was intense. I was woken up with a very loud audible BREATHE. I know it was from my husband.

I long for him to come back. At the very least I long for him to let me know he is here in some way, like other people say they experience. I long to believe that’s even possible and yet, he told me to BREATHE.

You are so real. The honestly and sensitivity in this meditative story reminds me of that and that yes, I must BREATHE.

I am going to listen to this one several times conseculativly as it’s very deep and I know I need every part of it to help me through this time.

Thank you.

Thank you, for telling me to BREATHE.

Honestly I’ve got this nearly on repeat right now. In a deep longing place and this helps each time I hear it. Thank you.

Wowwwwwwwww 🥹 thank you soullll much. A story to always return to!

I love these shared stories. They are emotional for me, and it’s helpful to know, as is mentioned within, I am not alone.

Its very hard...but yes..so nice to have you with me ...

Loved this Bethany 🙏. So soothing, just beautiful ❤️

Your words are comforting and made me feel like I belong. Thank you. 🙏🏼

How concisely you speak for my heart that I’ve been trying to decipher in myself. Simplified a truth entangled by reactionary emotions and ‘what ifs’ from past experience. I see now grief I been through before doesn’t really compare for it is finite and longing is that leaf. The belief that must be let go before it could ever arrive. Thank you for sharing with me a lesson on one the most challenging human condition I’ve experienced.

I love this, top shelf wisdom.

Hit the heart mark with an aching arrow of truth. I was strengthened by this vulnerable connection.

Touching and soothing, thank you ❤

Thank you for sharing the words to honor and not avoid ✨

This is wonderful!!