Shared Identity Practice

In this practice, we'll be thinking of a person in your life who seems to be very different from you in every way that you can imagine. They might have different interests, different religious or political beliefs, or different life experiences. They may even be someone with whom you have had a personal conflict or who belongs to a group that has been in conflict with a group to which you belong. We will be working through finding commonalities.

Transcript

Welcome to this shared identity practice.

First,

Think of a person in your life who seems to be very different from you in every way that you can imagine.

They may have different interests,

Different religious or political beliefs,

Or different life experiences.

They may even be someone with whom you had a personal conflict,

Or who belongs to a group that has been in conflict with a group in which you belong.

Next,

Make a list of all the things that you most likely share in common with this person.

Perhaps you both work for the same company or go to the same school.

Maybe you both have children or a significant other.

Probably you have both had your heart broken at one point or another,

Or have lost a loved one.

At the broadest level,

You both belong to the human species,

Which means you share 99.

9% of your DNA.

Review this list of commonalities.

How do they make you see this person in a new light?

Instead of simply seeing this person as someone unfamiliar to you,

Or as a member of an out-group,

Now try to see this person as an individual,

One whose tastes and experiences might even overlap with yours in certain ways.

Repeat this exercise whenever you meet someone who initially seems different from you,

With whom you have a conflict,

Or someone who makes you feel uncomfortable.