Chronically Chill Self-Care presents a meditation for compassionate partnership.
Being in partnership with another person is rewarding.
Partnership encourages growth,
Allows for depth of experience,
And creates the sense of connectedness that humans need to thrive.
Whether you're in a romantic relationship or not,
When you spend time with another person,
Your nervous systems become intertwined,
And you become sensitive to the shifts and changes in that person's energy.
Our endocrine systems release hormones as a response to both our external and internal environments,
And while the feeling of an experience is purely personal and subjective,
Humans have the ability to pick up on those hormonal shifts in others.
By spending time with someone,
You attune your energy to theirs,
Which includes becoming more sensitive to their specific hormone production.
It can be challenging to notice the changes in your partner and not feel like you have to take ownership over their feelings.
Anxiety states especially are contagious.
When one partner's thoughts spiral out of control and start affecting their hormonal states,
The people around them,
Especially those whose energy is more attuned to those shifts,
May accidentally be affected.
In partnership,
That may result in changes in behavior over time or increased reactivity,
Where one partner feels responsibility over the emotional state of another.
It can be tough to maintain a personal sense of groundedness amidst change.
So how can you maintain your personal integrity,
Your groundedness,
While experiencing energetic shifts from other people?
How can you encourage your partner to increase their sense of agency over the energy they send out?
How can you maintain compassion and accept your partner wholly,
Even when faced with contradiction or difficult emotions?
This short meditation is designed to give you a sense of groundedness while interacting with the energetic shifts of those with whom you create partnership.
First,
I encourage you to take ownership over your own energetic sphere of influence.
To do this,
You may imagine yourself surrounded by a bubble of light.
Our chakras produce energy,
And when the seven energy points intersect,
They create an aura of light around a person.
These chakra points also overlap places of hormone production,
So by intentionally engaging this practice,
You can learn to control your own responses more effectively.
Take a deep breath into your belly and sigh it out to release any tension that's building up in your body.
Take another slow breath in,
And with your eyes closed,
Imagine yourself surrounded by a sphere of white light.
Continue breathing with your own rhythm,
And imagine that light growing stronger.
Feel yourself growing more capable of protecting your personal energy.
Next,
We'll engage the power of affirmation.
Repeat after me,
Either silently in your mind or out loud.
My partner's emotions are theirs.
I have compassion for how they feel.
I can control my responses.
But I cannot control my partner.
I see my partner,
And I respect their agency.
If you yourself are experiencing emotions you're expecting another person to take responsibility for,
You may try repeating the following affirmation.
My emotions are mine.
My partner is compassionate to and understanding of my emotions.
But my thoughts and feelings are mine to control.
Now begin to notice your emotions in your body.
Notice the impulse you have to confront your partner.
Where do you feel this impulse in your body?
What does the sensation feel like?
Take the time to explore your body consciously and experience each emotion as sensation.
Feel any points of pressure.
Feel any tension you're holding in your muscles.
Begin to breathe consciously into those spaces.
Breathe deeply into your belly and send nourishing energy to each place you feel the sensation of your emotions.
Mindfully begin relaxing each area of tension until you feel your whole body soften.
Take notice of any thoughts that come up during this exercise.
Continue breathing into each space until your thoughts and emotions change.
As you begin addressing the sensations of reactivity in your body,
Feel your compassion toward your partner expanding.
Feel your love and acceptance of them growing through each breath you take.
Release attachment to control through each exhale.
Feel the heat of your exhale releasing you from the expectation of outcome.
As you breathe in,
Imagine the light around you growing stronger,
More stable,
Providing a sense of calm and peace.
Remind yourself that your responsibility is to control yourself.
Partnership allows us to become intertwined with another person,
But your partner's path is uniquely their own.
Allow them to be the creator in their own life,
Just as you are the creator of yours.
