Loving-Kindness Practice For Building Self-Esteem

A lovely 10-minute practice. Brief grounding practice at the start then a basic loving-kindness focus on one person with some self-compassion. This is a great practice if you are struggling with self-esteem.

Transcript

Hello,

My name is Chris.

I'm the Suti Jogi and today we're going to do a lovely 10 minute loving kindness practice.

So before we start,

Find yourself a nice comfortable seat.

It could be on a chair,

It could be on the floor,

But just make sure you're going to be comfortable for around 10 minutes and just settle into stillness.

I invite you now to either close your eyes or gently bring your gaze low as we start to quieten the mind.

Before we focus on our compassion part of the practice,

We're just going to ground ourselves.

So what I'd like you to do is just focus on the connection between your body and whatever it is that's supporting you.

Whether it's the floor,

Whether it's a chair.

And with every exhale,

Feel yourself melting into the chair,

Into the floor.

Feel a sense of support,

A sense of being held,

A sense of being safe.

So with every exhale,

Have a sense of letting go.

And very subtly now.

We're going to switch our attention to our breath.

We're going to start by breathing in through the nostrils.

Nice long deep inhale.

A gentle pause at the top and then exhaling through the nostrils.

A gentle pause at the bottom and then continue through the nostrils,

Breathing at your own pace with a very subtle transition at the top and the bottom of the breath.

And as we're doing this,

Let's shift our attention to the tip of our nose.

So the practice of anapanas.

Just that lovely sense of tickling the end of the nostrils.

So have a sense of maybe cool air coming in and warm soothing air going out.

Try to bring all of your focus just to that tip of the nose.

A lovely warm sensation,

Comforting like a little massage.

And then very subtly on your next exhale,

Just go back to normal breathing.

So whatever works for you.

And just sit in stillness and have a sense of how you feel emotionally.

So no judgment,

But just a label.

Do you feel calm,

Relaxed,

Focused,

Grounded?

And just remember how you got there,

Those very simple little tools that you can use anywhere.

Focusing on connection from the body into whatever's supporting you,

The ground or a chair.

And then focusing on one part of the body.

That's your toolkit.

So we're going to move on to the compassion,

Part of this practice.

And we're going to be focusing on a little bit of self-tongue-in-the-nose,

Self-compassion.

So from the likes of my teacher Christopher Germer,

And a little bit of Polly Vagle,

Just to give us a sense of connection and safety.

So from the wonderful Dr Stephen Porges.

And this is a visualization.

So for those of you who haven't done this before,

We're going to be using our mind just to think of scenarios and try to feel them.

But be kind to yourself,

Have no expectation of magically escaping off into a wonderful dreamland.

It's just thinking of something and feeling a little bit of it.

And the first thing we're going to think of is somebody who's very special to us.

Someone who's very dear.

Maybe a parent,

Maybe a partner,

Maybe a child,

Maybe a sibling,

Maybe a friend.

Just think of them sat in front of us.

And as they're sat in front of us,

Make eye contact with them.

See that lovely shine in their eye as they realize it's you.

That beautiful connection.

And say hello in your mind's eye to them and whatever their name might be.

And I'm going to introduce some phrases which we're going to repeat in our mind's eye.

And whilst you're repeating these phrases,

I'd like you to think of the words and think of the person's reaction.

So for example,

The first phrase is,

May you be well.

When you're looking at that person,

See them be well,

See them be healthy,

See them shine.

So I'm going to introduce the phrases now.

In your mind's eye,

Say these to that person sat opposite you.

May you be well.

May you be happy.

May you be safe.

May you be loved.

May you be well.

May you be happy.

May you be safe.

And may you be loved.

And very subtly now,

We're going to swap roles with that person.

So imagine you are that person looking back at you.

How would you feel as a parent or as a child looking back at you?

That sense of pride maybe,

Of love.

And so let's say those words back at you.

Looking into your eyes.

May you be well.

May you be happy.

May you be safe.

May you be loved.

May you be well.

May you be happy.

May you be safe.

May you be loved.

And very subtly in your visualisation,

Coming back into your own body,

Looking across at that dear person.

And through whichever gesture works for you,

It might be a little wave or hand on heart.

Just say thank you as they slowly walk away.

And just enjoy that lovely sense of connection that you shared with that person.

And before we close,

I'm just going to read a poem.

It's by an unknown author.

It's called Heartprints.

Whatever our hands touch,

We leave fingerprints.

On walls,

On furniture,

On doorknobs,

Dishes,

Books.

There's no escape.

As we touch,

We leave our identity.

Wherever I go today,

Help me to leave heartprints.

Heartprints of compassion,

Of understanding and of love.

Heartprints of kindness and genuine concern.

May my heart touch a lonely neighbour or a runaway daughter or an anxious mother or perhaps an aged grandfather.

Send me out today to leave heartprints.

And if someone should say,

I felt your touch,

May they also sense the love that is deep within my heart.

So very gently now,

Just bringing a little bit of movement to the body.

Maybe take a longer inhale and slowly open the eyes.

Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule today to practice with me.

May you be well.

May you be happy.

May you be safe.

And may you be loved.

Reviews

Thank you! This is just what I needed!

Thank you for this wonderful loving kindness meditation. Namaste✨

Such a kind and compassionate voice! Thank you so much for this soothing meditation, like a balm for the heart ❤️

Beautiful! Thank you! 🙏

Thank you ❤

Thanks for sharing your guided meditation. I feel less anxious and more grounded to start the day.

As always, listening to the Suited Yogi, I feel calm, I feel loved and most of all, I feel blessed 🙏
namaste

Very nice! Loved that poem too. Thank you

Very sweet and lovely. Bookmarked.

Beautiful. Thank you!🙏