Being Present With Anger

Anger is a powerful energy that can be very overwhelming when not attended to mindfully. This meditation is a somatic practice to touch into the body sensations of anger in a safe and trauma-informed way and provide skills to safely release anger from our body.

Transcript

Hello and welcome to Choosing Mindfulness.

My name is Banu Joy Harrison and I'll be guiding you through a mindfulness practice on being present with anger.

We all feel anger when we are annoyed,

Frustrated,

Upset,

Helpless,

Out of control,

Or in the presence of injustice.

Anger is a very powerful emotion with distinct body sensations that can be overwhelming or scary.

Few of us learn how to work with our anger in helpful ways and many of us turn our anger back towards ourselves,

Which can lead to sadness and depression.

So how can we be with anger in a different way?

I view anger as a biological,

Instinctual response when we feel or perceive that our boundaries are being violated or threatened.

And anger then becomes a protective mechanism to keep us safe.

The challenge is the shift from reactive,

Harmful anger,

Which can hurt ourselves or others,

To noticing the very powerful impulse of this defensive response and create some space to choose how to respond.

This mindful process requires much practice and skill as well as gentle pacing.

Anger is an emotion that can feel very overwhelming,

So we will titrate or modulate just small parts of anger during this practice.

If at any time this meditation feels too much,

Please take a break,

Look around your environment,

Or even come back to this meditation at another time.

So let's begin.

I encourage you to do this practice sitting or even standing up with eyes open or closed because anger is an emotion that demands mobilization and movement.

Just take care to maintain your balance.

As you settle into your posture,

Notice an object in the room or outside that you enjoy and begin to explore its qualities such as color,

Shape,

Texture.

Look around your space and include sounds and fragrances that you notice.

Orienting to our present moment experiences and environment can help us feel safe and settled as we tap into more challenging emotions.

Now take a moment to recall a mild annoyance or anger experience.

Are you noticing any activation in your body?

Sensations like a quicker heart rate,

Feeling restless,

Noticing fast moving thoughts,

Or feeling distracted are part of our sympathetic nervous system's fight or flight mode,

Which accelerates our body processes as we prepare to defend and protect ourselves.

These are all very normal responses when we begin to touch into our body experience of upset and anger.

Return your attention now to your environment again and notice what happens as you orient.

Looking around,

Becoming curious about the colors,

Shape,

Texture,

Or sounds in your space.

Notice any shifts in your body such as changes in your breathing,

Muscle tension,

Or internal sensation of speed as you continue to orient to your posture,

To your place in the room,

Or your environment outdoors.

Now,

Return your attention back to the remembered experience of anger and touch into just a bit of it again.

You may notice body sensations,

Other emotions besides upset or anger,

Or even particular thought loops that arise when you think about this experience.

Just be curious and notice what is happening with this.

Notice if the storyline of the event dominating your attention is most present.

We often have a strong story around our anger,

Who hurt or wronged us,

Or what we wished we could have said or done.

This is normal as we replay the events in our mind.

However,

It can amplify our body responses,

Which can be very uncomfortable.

See if you can set the story aside for right now and return your awareness to your body.

What sensations are occurring now in relation to this experience of upset and anger?

Are you noticing tightness in your jaw or hands?

Perhaps your legs are restless,

Wanting to move.

Does it feel like there's a lot of energy in your body?

Or does it feel like too much energy in your chest and abdominal areas?

Mindful,

Attentive,

And slow movements can really help move anger through our body in a way that is gentle,

Without harming anyone.

Sense right now if your body wants to do something.

You may feel these impulses in your arms or legs or vocal cords.

If you feel this impulse to do something with your hands,

Try squeezing a pillow or a cushion with your hands in a slow and mindful way.

If you feel activity in your legs and feet,

Press into the floor or tap your feet into the floor with some pressure.

Really feel the resistance.

If you're feeling a lot of energy in your throat or jaw,

See if you can exhale with a sound.

Be curious of how these movements feel.

Now stop the movement and take a few deep breaths.

What are you noticing?

Is the tightness or tension in your jaw or hands different?

What is happening in your legs?

Or your chest?

Or your jaw or throat?

See if you can be present and curious and kind toward any sensations that you're experiencing after this intentional movement.

Repeat the movements one more time,

Noticing the impulse of how your body wants to move and then slowly move,

Squeeze or press with your arms,

Hands or legs or exhale with a sound for a short time now.

Feel the sensations in your muscles as you're pressing or pushing or squeezing.

If the storyline returns again,

That's okay.

Shift your attention back to your body sensations as best as you can.

Now stop the movement and again take a few deep breaths.

Orient your attention back to your environment.

Are you noticing different qualities in your space?

Are you seeing or hearing different things now?

Check in with your body to notice if it feels the same or different.

There's no right way to do this or no right result.

The idea is to be curious and have kind attention to your experience with this very challenging emotion.

This practice of mindfully pendulating or shifting our attention between our present environment and our body sensations of a remembered upset or angering experience can help our bodies shift from being stuck in an emotion like anger to coming back into more flow.

This process can also help us be more present with more kindness towards these difficult experiences.

Ask yourself right now,

What do I need in this moment?

This process of nurturing ourselves is helpful to continuing to move through and be present with this challenging emotion.

Would it feel good to place my hand on my heart?

Do I need to have a conversation with someone that could help repair the situation or create more understanding?

Do I need to offer myself some kindness if I feel badly about how I reacted?

How can my experience of anger empower me to set clearer boundaries or express my needs more clearly?

Beginning to identify what we need as we work with anger is a very helpful tool to begin to understand what is happening within us and what we need to do to move forward.

Other practices such as exercising with an attitude of mindfulness,

Journaling or artwork can assist us in letting anger move through us rather than getting stuck.

Stay curious and experiment with different strategies with kindness and attention.

As we bring this practice to a close,

Acknowledge yourself for having the courage to step into being present with anger,

Creating more curiosity and spaciousness with this powerful energy.

And thank you so much for practicing with me.

Reviews

This is an incredibly helpful meditation. Thank you for offering this. 🙏🏽

I was feeling angry about several things this morning and body awareness has never really helped me with anger UNTIL TODAY. This was just what I needed and SO HELPFUL. I definitely plan on repeating several times as road rage and anger are things I struggle with.

Dealing with a lot of anger right now associated with my PTSD. Out of all the meditations I have listened to on this app, this one has spoken to me the most. Thank you!

This simple approach was actually very effective! Thank you💗

Thank you.

The slower we go the faster we get there! My new mantra!

Very helpful in widening the emotional window of tolerance and feel more comfortable with certains situations/emotions.
Much thanks for sharing this practice. 🙏

Presence, curiosity, and kindness. You share these lessons so smoothly that I can be present with my anger, feel it come and go in my body, and accept the necessity or benefits that mindful anger brings. Thank you. I will be listening to this again.

This is so simple yet so powerful. Thank you for guiding me through this difficult emotional state while modeling non-judgment.