Life is always in flux.
Every thought,
Feeling,
And moment is quickly changing into the next.
In the moment,
When something feels difficult,
It seems like it will never pass.
This practice is about learning how to stay with and turn toward the difficulty.
As much as we would like to know,
To control,
And to plan every little part of our lives so that it all works out in a way that creates more security,
Ease,
And happiness,
We cannot.
Life will always be impermanent and therefore always uncertain.
When it comes to difficult thoughts and emotions,
There is a tendency to resist or deny what is happening,
Often by finding something to distract us or to try to create pleasure.
Yet,
The difficulties still arrive,
And we never really know what is coming next.
Sometimes,
The best and most courageous thing we can do is turn towards the difficulty with compassion and awareness.
Sitting comfortably now or lying down with your eyes closed or open and centering your attention on the feeling of the breath.
Wherever it's easiest for you,
Just normal,
Natural breath,
Feeling the rising and falling of the belly or noticing the breath coming in and out of the nostrils.
Breathing in,
Breathing out.
Now,
As you're ready and as best you can,
Consciously bringing to mind a difficult or troubling feeling or situation from the recent or distant past,
A scenario that holds uncomfortable emotion for you.
Maybe sadness,
Fear,
Shame,
Or anger.
Perhaps not starting with the most difficult or traumatic thing you can think of,
But something that nevertheless triggers those uncomfortable emotions in some way.
Take a few moments to fully recall the situation.
Doing this isn't likely to feel comfortable,
But stick with it.
At any point,
You can return to following your breath for respite.
As you begin to recognize the emotion or emotions that arise,
See if you can simply allow their presence without pushing them away.
What bodily sensations accompany the emotions this scenario calls up?
Can you tell where in your body you feel these emotions?
When you observe the emotion or emotions,
Does your mouth go dry?
Is your breathing changing?
Are you clenching your teeth?
Is there a lump in your throat?
Whatever is happening in your body,
Noting it.
If you can feel the emotion in the body,
And we can't always do that,
It gives you a concrete way to disengage from the story and simply observe the emotions changing nature.
Bringing your focus to the part of the body where those sensations are the strongest,
And knowing that you don't have to do anything about them except be aware of them.
Once your attention has moved to the body,
Once your attention has moved to the bodily sensations,
Perhaps saying to yourself,
It's okay,
Whatever it is,
It's okay.
I can feel this without pushing it away or getting caught up in it.
Staying with the awareness of the feelings in your body and your relationship to them,
Accepting them with compassion,
Letting them be,
Softening and opening to them.
And perhaps noticing as you sit with them a while,
Do the sensations change?
Does the emotion change?
How?
Remembering that often what we are feeling is not just one emotion.
Grief may include moments of sorrow,
Moments of fear,
Of powerlessness,
Maybe even of relief,
Anticipation or curiosity.
Simply noticing all the different things you feel,
And knowing that sometimes it is hard to name a feeling.
So just being aware of the sensation of the feeling in the body.
Noticing here as well if there are any particular thoughts that accompany this feeling of emotion and sensation in the body.
Are the thoughts familiar,
Positive or negative about yourself or others?
Is there a voice that the thoughts arise with?
Simply noticing,
Paying attention to the moment by moment changing nature of your experience.
You may notice yourself resisting these difficult emotions and the bodily sensations that accompany them.
Or the thoughts that come as well,
Pushing them away and perhaps feeling ashamed of them.
Or maybe you find yourself getting pulled into them,
Replaying an argument or reliving feelings of rage,
Helplessness or humiliation.
If you feel overwhelmed by emotions,
Use awareness of your breath to anchor your attention back into your body.
This always helps you return to the present moment.
If you find yourself thinking,
I will always feel this way,
Or if I were stronger,
More patient,
Smarter,
Kinder,
I wouldn't feel this way.
Just noticing those thoughts as merely thoughts.
And then returning to the simple truth of this moment,
Sitting and being aware of your breath.
See if you can recognize that the emotion is a temporary state and not your total self.
Practicing staying with the feeling or feelings and untangling the various strands may lead you to realize that what you thought was a thick wall of unmovable misery is a constantly shifting combination of emotions,
Sensations,
Thoughts,
Always changing.
This perception alone can make the feelings more manageable.
So now,
Returning your awareness to the feeling of your body in the chair or lying down.
Just noting the sensations of contact and pressure with the surface beneath you.
Feeling the simple flow of your breath at your belly or your nostrils or your chest.
Feeling into the safety and groundedness of this moment.
And as you return into your day,
Knowing that you are growing and that you have the ability to bring your compassionate awareness to whatever difficulties arise,
Building a muscle of resilience and living fully with all that life brings you,
Its beauty and its challenges.
