Letting Go Of Overwhelm

It's so easy to feel overwhelmed these days. This recording will help you let go of the overwhelm and feel peaceful again. It's wonderful to feel the anxiety fall away and feel yourself again. Peace of mind is our birthright.

Transcript

Hi,

This is Brooks and I'm talking to you today from my living room.

I like to move around and give talks in different rooms.

So,

Uh,

It makes more fun.

It's like I'm traveling within my house.

So,

Uh,

Today I had this thought to talk about letting go of being overwhelmed.

And it's really common to get overwhelmed.

I mean,

I think that's part of our mechanism.

It happens to us a lot.

There's just too much going on and we're overloaded and it's like a computer that crashes.

And everybody has a different level of overwhelm.

And sometimes we don't know we're about to become overwhelmed because the more we head in that direction,

The more we lose our capacity to really be aware of what's going on inside of us.

Like it makes things foggy.

And then when we get really overwhelmed sometimes we get lost in that too.

And then what we'll do is panic,

You know,

Which doesn't help,

Right?

But that's because we're overwhelmed.

And then we might feel guilty about being overwhelmed,

Which makes it worse.

It's like gasoline on fire.

So I think what helps sometimes is the recognition in the moment when it happens.

Like,

Oh my God,

I'm overwhelmed.

Everything is too much for me right now.

It's a gentle sense like,

Oh,

This is what's happening,

You know?

I don't want to blame myself for getting to this place.

Sure,

Maybe I could,

You know,

It would have been nice if I had taken a nap earlier or didn't try to do as much.

But things happen.

Life happens.

If you're cooking something in the kitchen and it catches fire,

To get upset yourself for the fire would get in the way of you putting it on the fire.

So it really helps to,

You know,

If it happens in the midst of overwhelm to recognize I'm overwhelmed.

And I like to say if it happens,

So there isn't this feeling of I have to do this.

If I don't do it,

Then I'm bad.

Because there's the funny thing about being a human being is we look for so many ways to put ourselves down,

To be critical of ourselves,

You know?

And it's training.

It's part of society.

Criticism is often considered the way to create change.

Not a very effective way,

You know?

Not very effective.

Compassion goes a long way for ourselves and for others.

It's not easy being a person.

There's a lot of great things about being alive and being human,

Being a person.

But there's also,

It's like a mixed bag,

You know?

Sometimes we're critical when it doesn't help.

And sometimes we get overwhelmed.

So this is a gentle reminder that perhaps in the midst of the overwhelm you might recognize,

Oh,

This is happening to me.

And it's like an injury,

You know?

To be overwhelmed is to be injured.

If we sprain our ankle,

It's like,

Oh,

Yeah,

I was going for a run and I sprained my ankle.

Okay,

Now I got to go to the doctor,

I got to tape it up or something like that.

It's like this happened,

You know?

A part of me got damaged.

That's why it hurts and now I have to take care of it.

It's the same thing when we get overwhelmed.

It's deeper.

It occurs deeper within us.

But it doesn't feel good.

It hurts.

It diminishes us.

And because it affects our thinking,

That's why it's hard sometimes to notice,

Oh,

I'm overwhelmed.

It reduces our clarity.

So that's why I like to be,

To introduce this as a gentle suggestion.

Because to say,

Oh,

I got to do this or if I don't do this,

Something's wrong with me.

It just adds to what ends up becoming overwhelmed,

You know?

When we push ourselves too much,

Things like that.

The striving to be perfect.

I guess not our fault for wanting to be perfect or to be all the right things.

You know,

We grew up in an education system where we're graded for everything that we do.

You know,

It feels good to get an A.

Feels crappy to get an F.

I know as a kid,

I got a lot of Fs and Ds.

C minuses sometimes like,

Oh,

Wow,

I broke out of the D level and I got to the C level.

I get excited,

You know?

But I did become very sensitive to criticism.

I think that's the case for a lot of us as a result of that or parents that are very critical.

So sometimes it happens that we want to be perfect in our lives to avoid criticism from others.

Just because that's how it felt from the past.

You know,

The past is over,

It's in the so what realm.

So what happens?

Oh,

Well,

It happens.

What can I do now?

Perhaps I can be kinder and gentler with myself in these new ways.

So that when I'm overwhelmed,

When I recognize,

Oh,

My God,

I'm like a chicken with my head cut off.

I'm overwhelmed.

Okay,

It's good to know.

I'm grateful for the information,

You know?

Thank you.

Wherever it came from,

Thank you.

And now I wonder what I could do to feel better.

That's the antidote to overwhelm.

I mean,

First is the gentle recognition.

But the second is like,

Okay,

I'm overwhelmed.

What can I do?

And everyone's going to have a different answer.

For some people,

It might be stop doing what I'm doing right now.

For others,

It might be,

Oh,

I'm going to take a break and go outside and come back.

Maybe I'm going to take a nap.

Or maybe I need a drink of water.

Or maybe I need to eat lunch.

Or maybe I need to use the restroom.

Or maybe I need to play with my dog.

Or do something fun.

Or whatever.

There's like,

That's seven answers out of innumerable answers that are possible.

But it comes from asking that question out of compassion for yourself.

I've injured myself.

I got overwhelmed.

Oh,

Well.

What can I do to help?

Maybe an answer doesn't come right away.

Maybe it takes half an hour.

Or a couple hours.

Doesn't matter.

Just recognizing what's happened starts the healing.

The compassionate awareness starts the healing.

And the overwhelm begins to dismantle.

And as that disorder begins to dissipate,

Peacefulness takes over.

A sense of space within ourselves begins to come to the forefront.

So overwhelm is really the lack of inner space.

You know,

We've lost that inner space.

Inner space is like a sense of awareness of what's going on.

When we get overwhelmed,

That awareness goes away and then everything's just loud and too much.

So as that awareness starts to,

That overwhelm starts to fall away,

The space,

That gentle healing space comes in.

And that's where we get our lives back.

So it's worth considering this and trying it on.

As with all this stuff that I talk about,

It's like you go to a store and you're trying a shirt.

How does it feel?

And the same with this stuff.

This isn't like you have to do this or you have to do it this way.

Maybe you come up with a better way.

Whatever works.

And thank you for listening.

Reviews

'like words with entire new definitions.. a wire tightly wrappped around n around in a ball..not letting go..yr words give pause..relief'

Brooks' comment on school grades and neverending competition brought up long buried stress in my body and mind.

As insightful as ever, thanks for making me feel normal 🙏🏼

Thank you so much, Brooks. This showed up at a time when I needed to hear all of this; I’ve been in a state of almost perpetual overwhelm for weeks now…& maybe on and off for years, partly b/c as a nurse during the pandemic it’s been impossible to function the way I’d like to and am expected to work…and those unrealistic espectations are coming from both inside me and from people outside. So have been really noticing and sitting w the awareness of how this is not working…& how deeply conditioned it is for me.
So your honest, authentic and wonderfully vulnerable talk have given me some ways to work w myself. And realizing that I cannot shift others’ expectations, I can only shift my own expectations. So there may be criticism or disappointment from people (like bosses and colleagues😬) and even from myself, but again you so clearly and gently touched upon that and so much more in this 10 minutes of sharing!

Am so grateful that even though you’ve shifted from the land of clutter busting you’re still sharing insight and wisdom here! It means a lot to me. Plus, I love your spontaneity!!
Enough rambling for now…I just wanted to more fully articulate how meaningful and helpful this was for me. 💜🌟🌳💞