This is the eighth of ten mindfulness practices designed to help you increase emotional balance and presence in the current moment.
Pain and suffering are unavoidable parts of life,
And it's a paradox that when we avoid emotional and physical distress,
They become worse.
This practice will strengthen your emotional resilience by increasing your capacity to turn towards discomfort rather than away from it.
The mindfulness exercises in this series were designed in a progressive fashion to develop your ability to participate in more challenging practices such as approaching and accepting difficult emotions.
An important first step towards emotional resilience is emotional awareness.
Knowing what we're feeling and being able to accurately label it helps us regulate emotions.
Dr.
Daniel Siegel referred to this when he said,
Name it to tame it.
However,
When we're overwhelmed or stressed,
It's common to not be aware of what we're feeling.
When emotions are difficult to identify,
We can look to the physical sensations in our body.
For example,
Feelings of unease in the stomach can equate with fear.
Heaviness in the shoulders or a collapsing of the chest can indicate sadness.
And wanting to hide by putting your hands to your face can signify shame.
When emotions operate outside our awareness or are unregulated,
We're more likely to act in ways that are inconsistent with our values.
This can create a recurring cycle of emotional distress.
There is evidence that sustained mindfulness practice strengthens the brain's prefrontal cortex,
Which increases our ability to approach unpleasant emotional and physical states.
This practice will integrate elements from Les Greenberg's emotion-focused therapy and advances in neuroscience.
We'll use a technique called pendulation,
Which increases our ability to tolerate and regulate difficult emotions.
We'll do this by alternating our attention between areas in the body that are pleasant with those that are unpleasant and challenging.
We'll increase emotional awareness by labeling and naming emotions,
And we'll practice acceptance by allowing them to be part of your experience for a brief time without pushing them away.
By repeating this process,
You'll increase your ability to tolerate difficult emotions,
Which is vital for emotional and physical well-being.
You'll also increase your capacity to become non-reactive to difficult emotions,
Which can represent a dramatic shift in how you live your life.
Let's begin by finding a posture that's comfortable for you.
Notice the sensations in your body where your feet make contact with the floor and where your hands rest.
You may push your feet into the floor.
Make contact with that sense of grounding,
That sense of balance.
Notice and become aware of your breathing.
See if you can find an anchor to the present moment,
Whether it's the breath or the grounding in the body.
Observe the sensations and notice that that anchor keeps you connected to the present moment.
We're going to check inside the body and locate a part of the body that feels good to you.
Maybe it feels pleasant or safe or at ease,
Or at the very least,
It feels neutral.
This may be in your legs,
It may be in your feet or your hands or any other part of the body.
It really doesn't matter where it is.
Just find a space in your body that feels either pleasant or neutral and let your attention rest there.
Notice what's there.
Observe and label any sensations or emotions that you notice.
Breathe in and out from this part of the body and connect with the feelings and sensations that you notice.
Now,
If there's a place in your body that feels challenging or where you're experiencing an unpleasant emotion or physical sensation,
Just let your attention turn to that.
Look at it for a moment and notice what you feel in your body.
If it's an emotion,
Try to name it and label it.
If it's an unpleasant physical sensation,
Just notice it.
If it's an unpleasant thought,
Observe it without getting caught up in a story about it.
Just allow whatever is there to be there for a moment.
And now,
Turn your attention back to the part of the body that feels pleasant or neutral.
Connect with what you notice,
Whatever sensations are present there.
You might feel relief from shifting your attention away from something unpleasant.
Maybe taking a break from that which feels challenging.
Let yourself connect with this pleasant or neutral part in the body.
Finding a sense of grounding,
Finding a sense of peace or relief.
Breathe into and out from that pleasant or neutral part in the body.
And now,
Turn your attention back to whatever it was that was unpleasant or challenging.
Let your attention go back to it.
Notice it.
You may even lean into it.
Letting yourself feel what is there in a small way.
Name it by labeling it.
Just allow it to be there without resisting it or pushing it away.
Turn your attention back to the part of the body that feels pleasant or neutral.
Take a deep intentional breath into that part of the body and let it go.
Notice what's there.
Observe this pleasant or neutral place for a moment.
And breathe into and out from this part of the body.
Return your attention back to what's challenging.
See if you can allow yourself to turn towards it and feel a bit of what is there to be felt.
If your mind wants to make up a story about it,
Just observe and notice the mind.
Notice the emotions and sensations without evaluating them.
Without getting caught up in a story about it,
Just noticing what's there.
Breathing into and out from this part of the body.
Turn your attention back to the area of the body that's pleasant or neutral.
Take a deep intentional breath into that pleasant,
Neutral part of the body and let it go.
Give yourself a break from the challenging emotion or physical sensations.
Observe and connect with the pleasant,
Neutral part of the body.
Breathe into and out from this part of the body.
Feeling the sense of groundedness and balance.
As we approach the end of the practice,
Hold your awareness on both parts of the body at the same time.
See if you can allow about 75% of your awareness to connect with the pleasant,
Neutral part of the body.
And hold about 25% of your attention and awareness on that which is difficult.
Hold these two together for a moment.
With a greater weight on that which is pleasant and neutral and grounding.
Shift your attention back fully to the part of the body that is pleasant or neutral.
Take a deep intentional breath and let it go.
Bring self-compassion and acceptance and unconditional kindness towards yourself for participating in this activity.
For allowing yourself to do something difficult by turning towards something that's really quite challenging.
Widen your attention back to what it feels like to sit where you're sitting.
Notice your body's connection wherever you sit.
Notice the groundedness.
The balance and stability as you breathe in and out from that neutral,
Pleasant part of the body.
Widen your attention to the environment around you.
When you're ready,
You can open your eyes and bring this connection and present moment awareness back with you into the present moment.
And carry it with you in the coming moments of your day.
