
Self-Compassion For Your Inner Child
by Ben Douch
This guided practice is for when you feel like you're struggling, and what you most need is self-compassion. It can be difficult to step outside of our inner critic, particularly when we most need to. But it becomes a little easier if we bring to mind the vulnerability of our inner child and offer them our kind and caring words. In this practice, Ben guides you through a heartfelt visualisation, evoking the image of your younger self and generating the self-compassion you need right now.
Transcript
This guided meditation is for when you feel like you're struggling and what you most need is a loving and generous response from yourself.
But that can be so hard to do when you feel like you just don't deserve it.
All the emotions and thoughts you're immersed in feel just too sticky,
Too strong.
Perhaps you're struggling right now,
Feeling rejected,
Abandoned,
That you've made a mistake,
Failed at something,
Feeling worthless,
Unlovable,
Neglected.
It's not easy to get the space needed within your mind and body to connect with a feeling of care for yourself,
But that's what we're going to do right now.
Generate that self-compassion you need and with it maybe heal some of those older wounds,
Those younger experiences which fuel how you're feeling right now.
In this practice,
The images you bring to mind,
They only have to be good enough.
They may appear with clarity,
With certainty,
Or rather fuzzy and unsure.
They may seem real or doubtful.
Whatever comes to mind is exactly where you need to be.
As best you can,
Be open to the practice and allow yourself to be guided.
You may wish to repeat some of the words which we offer to your younger self,
In your mind or out loud.
Feel free to do whatever feels right for you.
There are no rules here.
Settling in now,
See if you can find somewhere comfortable,
Sitting up or lying down.
Somewhere you can feel relaxed or focused on the mind and the body.
A place in which you can anchor yourself in the present and adventure into your imagination.
Let's begin with a couple of breaths to reset our habitual breathing patterns.
Just begin by closing your mouth.
Let's take a deep breath in through your nostrils,
Extending your belly and filling those lungs.
Then let it out with a sigh through your mouth.
And again,
Big breath in through the nostrils,
Expanding first the abdomen out to the sides and then up into the chest and then it all go with an airy out breath.
One more and this time we'll hold it in for a few seconds when reaching the end of the in breath.
Here we go.
Breathing in right up to the top.
Hold it for 5,
4,
3,
2,
1 and letting all that effort drop away.
Now close your eyes and allow your breath to find a rhythm which is soothing to you.
Allow it to find its own way.
Noticing the rise and fall of your body.
Just settling.
Testing in the spacious attention of the whole body.
Every limb letting go.
Nothing to hold onto now.
A softening in the eyes.
And flowing out through your face.
Shoulders letting go.
Arms resting.
Nothing to do here.
Knees in your chest and your belly.
Feeling safe.
Legs letting go too.
Breathing deeper and deeper into a light boundless awareness.
Bathing in this deep state of relaxation.
Now bring to mind a colour.
One which represents the feeling of compassion.
Feeling of kindness,
Of warmth.
Picture it in your mind.
Let it flow in.
Feeling every particle of your vision.
Expanding.
Growing.
Until it feels so full.
It gently starts to flow from your mind,
Through your body.
Feel the sensation of aliveness as it glides through every part of yourself.
This is your compassionate colour.
It will be with you throughout the practice,
Even when you aren't bringing it to mind.
We are starting to drift back in time now.
To when you were small.
No need to force this.
Just feeling your way there.
To a time when maybe you were just a couple of years old.
Or five,
Six,
Perhaps even a little older.
Whatever feels right.
A little version of you that wants to be seen.
Bring to mind a building in which you grew up in.
Just the first which comes to mind.
In one of the rooms inside this building,
You'll find your younger self.
Go search for them,
But give them a little space too.
You are standing at the doorway,
Looking in,
Just observing your younger self.
Feeling curious about them.
Offering your attention.
See them sitting there,
On a chair,
Bed,
Floor,
Maybe lying down.
Notice their posture.
Are they moving or still?
What are they wearing?
What's their demeanour like?
See their innocence,
So tender.
Their vulnerability.
This is you.
This is you just wanting to be loved.
With just your presence,
Without words necessary.
A feeling is evoked.
I see you little one.
You're not alone.
I'm here with you.
Notice your breathing in this moment,
Your equanimous,
Calming breath.
Your glowing,
Compassionate light gently flowing throughout the core of your body.
This strong and soothing breath.
Go over to them now.
Put your arm around them.
Feel what it's like to offer this caring touch to your younger self.
Maybe this evokes a tactile feeling,
Perhaps even a smell.
Hold them a little tighter.
Bring them a little closer.
And now,
Offer your voice.
Your healing voice.
How are you little one?
It's okay.
You can be however you need to be right now.
We all feel this way sometimes.
Life can be so painful,
So unpredictable.
Sometimes it's like this.
I know,
There's that little voice in your mind.
It seems so unkind.
It's actually trying to look after you.
But it's scared too.
Let it know it's okay.
You hear it.
And perhaps,
Just for a moment,
It can step back and allow you to feel what's there.
It's a little scary and it hurts.
It's okay.
I'm here with you.
I've got you.
I've got you.
You'll be okay.
Now squeeze them even tighter.
And as you do,
You notice the compassionate light starts to appear within them too.
Just faintly at first,
Almost translucent.
And you notice your soothing breath in harmony with that of your younger self.
And you say to them,
You're enough little one.
You don't need to be better in some way.
Life will present its challenges to you.
You'll make mistakes.
Feel embarrassed.
Question yourself.
But you'll be okay too.
You'll even learn something from these experiences.
Just like you are now.
And you'll grow.
And you'll grow and you'll grow.
You're enough little one.
You're enough.
Moment by moment,
The compassionate light within you both becomes more luminous.
Glowing.
You close your eyes for a twinkling.
And when you open them,
You see your present self through those young eyes.
You are embodying this younger,
Smaller you from all those years ago.
You're looking up into a wise,
Soft gaze,
An even softer smile.
This radiant being,
Shimmering a brilliant,
Compassionate light.
And inside little you,
A warm feeling,
A deep knowing is taking shape.
A knowing you'll be okay.
Your present self places their other arm around you.
This loving light emanating from your bodies.
A warm hug and a whisper in your ear.
Show me that beginners mind.
Show me how it is to be free.
To play.
And with this,
The room takes on the quality of an expansive,
Ethereal light,
Suffused with your compassion.
You both now just one being.
Whole.
Immersed within this humming light.
It's warm,
Radiating back at you.
And all around,
Gradually,
Iridescent embers emerge,
Thousands of them.
Like fireflies flickering in the boundless night.
Drifting.
Glimmering.
A light with your loving awareness.
A gentle smile forms on your face.
The beauty and the wonder of it all reflected in your eyes.
The feeling of awe,
The vastness.
You close your eyes with a feeling of expansion.
And lightness that you've never known before.
Unarising and lifting.
And letting go.
Letting go.
I've got you little one.
We are floating back now.
Gently returning to the present.
Dropping into your body and feeling what's there.
The aliveness.
And this deep knowing.
I'll be okay.
It's there too.
Compassionate embers still flickering.
They linger,
Ready to uplift others too.
Beginning to notice your breath.
This soothing yet vibrant breath.
The rise and the fall within your body.
The sensations from the tip of your toes to the crown of your head.
And all those paths in between.
An awareness of the sounds of the present within your body and in the world around you.
Letting you hear the bell in a few moments.
Gently open your eyes.
And as you do,
Silently remind yourself.
I've got you little one.
I've got you.
4.8 (136)
Recent Reviews
Matilda
December 2, 2023
I was severely abused growing up, this had me balling my eyes out. And I now feel connected to my inner child , thank you so much for a beautiful, well paced and immersive experience
Rebecca
September 25, 2023
Lovely, I needed that compassion and reassurance right now. Thank you 🤍
Janine
October 4, 2020
Very evocative and healing. Thank you.
Catherine
April 30, 2020
That was so beautiful, thanks so much. It was surprisingly touching and deeply healing as I started with quite a cynical mindset today.
Swastika
April 26, 2020
Just reduced me to tears and a semblance of assurance I have been seeking❤️🙏🏽 It’s been a while I have been trying to tend to my inner child needs. Thank you wouldn’t be enough.
Marian
April 25, 2020
Excelente. If I knew you would read Ben, I would have said that thanks to this meditation I recognized when, after a child, I forgot being compassionate. And thanks to you, I could remember how this felt and went back to that child, hugged her and took care o her and hence of me now as well in a more loving way. You have given me an enormous gift with this med. I m very thankful and look forward for some more. ❤🙏
Kim
April 25, 2020
I was so in that moment, it felt like 5minutes. Thank you 🙏
Marcy
April 25, 2020
That was an amazing journey you just took me on...I cried and cried, then smiled. Thank you so much❤️
Mithu
April 25, 2020
Thank you so much for the meditation. I am so grateful to you. You're a wonderful person who helped me to discover the wonderful person hidden in me. I don't know why after practising the meditation, my cheeks are wet but my lips are widened into a pleasant, innocent smile. My heart, arms, toes, crown everything seems so light. I am feeling so energetic and getting better ideas for my upcoming works. Thanks again.🙌👌🌷🌷💖💝
Barb
April 24, 2020
This is a wonderful meditation. It helped me connect with my younger, child self and offer healing compassion and reassurance about the life challenges that will be faced. . It’s really beautiful, thank you.
Aiden
April 24, 2020
I cannot begin to tell you how helpful this was. It has been a big step on healing my codependency even though it had me in tears! I feel like I’ve just seen how the last few seconds of my life in this body will be too. Such an unbelievable spiritual experience and possibly life saving in my healing journey. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for this.
